What's the difference between a Mercedes and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Mercedes in my garage.

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What did the drummer say to other drummer? "Hey, I'm a drummer too."

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A preposition is a bad thing to end a sentence with.

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What do homeless people get for Christmas? Nothing, they are homeless.

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husband : honey , can i have stuff candy wife : no husband : can i have milk and cookies wife : what kind of milk wink wink husband 2% you pervert

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What did little Robbie get for Christmas? AIDS

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What happens if you're in the middle of counting towels? You finish counting your towels.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Nick. Nick who? Nick Wyatt

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Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

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What does a man like. food.

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knock knock come in

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Whats worse than than Holocaust.? Finding two worms in your apple.

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How did the guy drown if he wasn't in water? A shark threw up on him

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A Quadriplegic walked into a bar,

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A mushroom walks into a bar, the bartender says, "We don't serve your kind." the mushroom asked why, the Bartender said, "Because your under aged"

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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

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What's similar about a black person and an apple? Nothing, an apple is a fruit. It has nothing to do with hanging from trees.

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What did one wall say to the other? Nothing, walls don't talk.

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chuck norris

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what was the dying mans last words? im dying

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Q.)What did the man say to the toilet A.) Hi Jon

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Your mother is so fat that unfortunately she can not fit into her picture for her passport and is not allowed to leave the country to go visit her dying mother.

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What do Ed Milliband and David Milliband have in common? They are brothers.

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Knock Knock Business Man: Who's There? Al Qeada Business Man: Al Qeada who? Al Qeada is flying an airplane into your building Then a commercial airplane flew into the oddly placed door on the 95th floor of the North Tower. That's how 9/11 happened. Have a nice day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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