What did the cowboy say to the alien? Nothing, this is a dream. Wake up.

Roses are green Violets are yellow I have mental problems Doobah haga Blakatrabbit

Nock nock. Whose there? Interrupting cow. Interrupting cow wh. ( mmmmooooo)

What do you call a retarded man? Nothing, because it's inappropriate to call retarded people names.

Why was the blond looking at the orange juice box? Because she was reading the nutritional content of orange juice.

Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness ... Hello?

What happend when Chuck Norris did a push up? He did one push up.

Whats worse then reading the same joke over and over again? Getting mutilated by a cupcake.

What's worse than being raped? Finding out that because you were sexually violated, you are now a victim of unplanned pregnancy and have contracted AIDS and any number of other STD's from the horrible expirence that will forever haunt your nightmares.

Hey! did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she...

Q: What did the Miracle Whip say when the refrigerator door was opened? A: Nothing. Miracle Whip cannot speak.

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff.

Why was the asian so good with computers? Because he spent 8 years in college getting a doctorate in computer programming at the University of Hartford

"Oh yeah?!" "Yeah!" "You wanna go?!" "No, sorry. I got plans." (walks away)

I'm gay. Great me too.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

Why did the small child fall off a cliff? Because it was stupid

Why did the lion get lost? -The jungle is massive

Shit.

Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

Your Mama is so poor. I begin to worry about you and your familys' finacial situation.

why didnt the deaf man laugh? he was also mute

Knock knock. Who's there? I am.

Why does Michael Jackson like K-mart? He does not; he is dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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