What did Jerry Sandusky get for Christmas? Raped in jail.

A guy walks into a bar and asks a nice looking girl if he can buy her a drink. She promptly rejects the offer.

There's a American, Mexican, and a Canadian stranded in the desert. They couldn't find any food, water, and shelter. They were all really hungry and thirsty. Later that day the Mexican dies from a very bad infection on his neck.

Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

Q: Whatcha doin?? A:Ur mom. . .

Q: how many Pollocks does it take to paint a house? A: 100. 99 to spin the house and 1 to hold the paint brush

A black guy and a Mexican jump off a bridge. Who dies first? Nobody cares.

A kid with no arms or legs is stuck in the desert. Sucks to be him.

What is the difference between a baby and a tampoline? You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

whats the difference between a dog and a cat? ones a dog.

Why did the boy miss a day off school? He was in a coma

What's green and eats rocks? A green rock-eater.

They say under Chuck Norris's beard, is just a chin.

Shit.

I have the heart of a child... in a jar on my desk.

Man: Drink this. Man 2: Ok. (Drinks it) Man; You drank a powerful substance that is 20000 times stronger than hydrochloric acid! Man2: Oh FUCK! Kelvin Yang.

If a midget is mentally retarded and always late for work, is it okay to call him a little tardy?

3 black men walk into a bar. They order their drinks, tip the bartender, and could not have been more courteous.

Why can't Hank swim? Hank is a rock

What do divorce and a loose bear in a zoo have in common? They both tear families apart

Why was the black man sad? People were frequently talking and whispering about his dark colouring behind his back. Also he had no legs.

milly, milly, milly, cat

What did the pig say to the banana? Oink.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other one's a watermelon

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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