What did the pig say to the banana? Oink.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am.

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Man: Drink this. Man 2: Ok. (Drinks it) Man; You drank a powerful substance that is 20000 times stronger than hydrochloric acid! Man2: Oh FUCK! Kelvin Yang.

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What is the first step in making an ugly girl pretty? Shave her genitals.

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What do divorce and a loose bear in a zoo have in common? They both tear families apart

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other one's a watermelon

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What is worse then Hitler? Shelly's Cooking.

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Why did our black president put a porch swing on the white house? He likes to swing.

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Whats blue, sticky and glows only during the morning? IDK -Lets go Mets

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Two gay men in a hottub. They relaxed for about half an hour before getting out and going to the bed, where they fell asleep.

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A man is walking down the street when, on the other side, he see's another man, with what appears to be an orange for a head. Unable to contain his curiosity, he approaches and enquires: "Excuse me, but I couldn't help noticing that you have you have an orange for a head..." "That's right" says the man with an orange for a head. "I met a magical genie one day who granted me three wishes..." "Amazing" says the first man, "Please continue". "Well, for my first wish, I wished I was incredibly rich, and that every day, I woke up in a four-poster bed full of used bank notes, and a statement with twenty zeros". "Did that happen?" askes the first man. "It did indeed", replies the man with an orange for a head. "I'm probably the richest man in the world". "Amazing!" replies the first man. "What did you wish for next?" "For my second wish, I wished to be incredibly attractive to women, and that every day, in my four poster bed full of money, when I awoke, there would be three of the most beautiful, naked women imaginable." "Wow! Did THAT happen?" "Of course! To be honest though, that gets a bit of a bind - walking around is a bit difficult these days, in fact, I'm on my way to pick up some cream." "No way, that's amazing!" says the first man. "What was your third wish?" "Well..." replies the man with an orange for a head, "For my third wish, I wished I had an orange for a head."

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a fat man eats porkchops all day ling shit a just craped my pants

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nock nock " whos there" , "open the door and you will see

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In Soviet Russia! People were much more finacially secure than they are now.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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A man walks into a bar.

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No entiendo PORQUE cada día amanezco

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A lady goes into the store to buy potatoes. Then she eats them.

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Gifted Education classes learning social studies curriculum.

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why is there a hole in the wall, i hope a prehistoric mole doesnt come out of that hole in the ball CC

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DONALD TRUMP DIES

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What's worse than listening to a teacher talk? This joke.

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What do you do when you see a black man? The same thing you do when you see anybody.

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Who wears a forest ranger's hat and carries a can of kerosene? An arsonist who happens to be a forest ranger.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops