Why couldn't the Little Boy hear his mother yelling at him? Because his mothers died

Q:Whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead baby? A:The dog has skidmarks in front of it -RDV

Why did the hooker go to the bathroom? Because she just exchanged sex for money and was cleaning herself up for her next trick.

Women's Golf

What do you do when you see a black man? The same thing you do when you see anybody.

hi ....................... oh i thought this was a chat room !!!!!!!

thomas hall= fuckin dikc

what is red and looks like blue paint? red paint.

Why did the old man step on the caterpillar? For fun.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and and no legs in front of a door? A: A quadruple amputee.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas don't scream when you put them in the oven.

What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF! What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF HOLDING ITS BREATH!

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

Knock knock! Who's there? It's me, Allison. Oh, come in!

What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

What's the best part about seventeen-year-olds? There's seven of them.

a women picks up her phone and screams! There were 3 missed calls from her mother-inlaw

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

Q; Why does paint dry? A; Because plankton are single cell organisms

Did you hear about the black man who went to college? Me too! I'm so proud of him!

Three black guys walk into a gym and play a rigorous game of basketball for an hour

A depressed gay teenager goes to his boyfriend’s house. Why and what happens? Shaun was often discriminated against for being homosexual. He always tried to be positive and a good person, but when his parents disowned him, Shaun couldn’t help but feel alone and unloved. Upset, Shaun went to his boyfriend’s house to seek comfort from his lover. Sunny, his boyfriend, immediately told Shaun that he loved him and things will get better for both of them. A year later, Shaun rebuilds his relationship with his old family and they apologize for their lack of understanding. Sunny and Shaun are very close emotionally, and wish to get married. However, they live in Texas, where marriage is outlawed. Shaun’s family agrees to help aid the couple financially in their marriage. They help Sunny and Shaun move to New York City where they had a successful gay marriage and pursued their dreams of becoming a video-game character designer/artist and a professional hop-hop dancer, respectively. They adopt their first child two months later and raise their child positively, and adopt her younger sister five months after that. The two daughters love their two dads and grow up to be a successful NASA scientist and a talented singer, respectively. Sunny and Shaun live a long, happy life together filled with love, happy, and joy. They die peacefully in their nineties.

What did the teacher say to the student? You did very poorly on your homework and will never succeed. The student was black.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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