knock knock father: who's there? young man: it's I, your son. father: ....... what? young man: dad let me in, I'm sorry! father: i don't have a son.... young man: but.... i love you... father: get off my porch, my son is dead to me. (whimper, fading footsteps)

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Knock Knock. Who's There? I have cancer.

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Every week or so Chuck Norris does his laundry.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? It varies. Alzheimer's is a very slow progressing disease, and many people suffering from it are capable of a wide variety of a number of everyday activities.

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your mom is so fat, shes not skinny

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Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy, was he? No, because he had cancer.

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What did one wall say to the other? Walls don't talk.

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Why was the man full? He ate a meal.

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Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a V, one side is long than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side

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What do you call a gay African American Jewish German flight attendant who is addicted to many hard drugs? His name.

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A man walks into a doctor's office. He is diagnosed with cancer. After three years he dies.

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What do you do when your speeding and a cop is right behind you? make a complete stop and hope for the best

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How do you piss off a blind person? Tell him to piss in a round room.

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What's worse than discovering a hornet's nest next to your house? Being raped.

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Roses are car Violets are giraffe this poem makes no sense microwave

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Why did Sandra fall of the swing? She had no arms... Knock Knock Who is there? Not Sandra

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

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How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

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what did the woman say when the guy told her he liked her christmas tree? thank you.

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What was Hitlers first toy? An easy back oven.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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How many drugs does it take for Eminem to sing in a live concert? Enough.

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What do you call a guy who likes men? Gay

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It should only take one person to do this job regardless of hair color.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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