I walked into a bar the other day and ordered a double. The bartender brought out a guy who looked just like me.

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Q: Why does the chicken cross the road? A: To get hit by a redneck.

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Put chromosomes in advertising. Because you know, Sex Cells

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What do you think when you see an asian woman behind the wheel of a car? She's very attractive.

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What's black and hangs from a tree in my yard? A tire, and it also happens to be a swing.

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What is the difference between a group of magicians and a cheerleading squad? One has a cunning array of stunts.

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A man goes to a gas station to pump gas in his car. After about 7 minutes, he leaves.

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Knock knock Who's There Sally Sally who? Sally who .got hit with a fridge and fell off a tree because I have no arms. Sorry, I do not know you.

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How come Billy can only swim in circles? His right arm and right leg were amputated because he scraped his left arm.

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Why did the mans nuts itch he had crabs

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Why was the boy dad? Because he was taken advantage of by an older woman during ovulation and impregnated her.

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Jimmy wet his pants in class during geography class. The teacher asked: "Oh Jimmy, why did you do that?" Jimmy answered: "I don't know" Everyone laughed at him and Jimmy went home very sad. And with wet pants.

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The iguana is the only mammal capable of photosynthesis.

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Photons have mass? i didn't even know they were catholic.

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Why did the Asian guy's condom slip? Because the condom was put on the opposite way.

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I couldn't decide whether to buy a pepperoni or a meat feast pizza? So i got neither and my two year old son died of starvation.

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why would you thank the KKK because they killed the president

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Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. No he doesn't.

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Justin Beiber walks into a bar. The bartender does not serve him because he is not the legal drinking age yet.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

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A jew, a catholic and a muslim walk into a bar. The catholic man dies of a massive heart attack and the other two men mourn their friend for weeks.

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A Jewish man with a 20 mile boner walks into a wall. Which body part hits the wall first? His nose

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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