What would a prostitute do if she was given a million dollars? She would probably diversify her portfolio. First, she would pay her rent. She would buy some groceries and a present for her mother. She would then invest it in stocks and low-yield bonds. She would they buy a vehicle. This win might not affect her continuance in her job.

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I had a friend named Joshua, he died of AIDs, cancer, and several other diseases.

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Why was the boy eating lunch by himself at school? Because his only friend was hit by a train.

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2 nuns were in a bathtub. One says to the other "Could you pass me the soap please?" The other replies, "What do you think I am, a radio?"

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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ask me if im a tree are you a tree? yes.

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What did the lady find when she walked through the door? Her husband stabbing himself to death because she ate his cornflakes

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A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar and ask the bartender for a drink, but in response the bartender politely points out that there are probably people in need of their assistance at their respective place of warship.

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Girl : What's a anti joke ? Boy : it's you .

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How do u turn on a lamp? Flip the switch

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How can you upset Helen Keller? In Braille spell out that she can't see or hear the hunger games

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A watermelon doesn't scream when you cut it open.

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Which does does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

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Charlie Sheen is winning

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three men walked into a bar, two walked out... One walked into a metal pole and died

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why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken so it will wonder when not properly fenced in

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My girlfriend dumped me because I'm patronizing. That means I treat people like they're stupid.

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a man walks into a bar, and says "can i get a beer please?" the bartender hands him his beer, and as soon as the man starts to take a drink, the man dies of a massive heart attack because of his unhealthy lifestyle

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Miscarriages.

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Why was the little girl sad? Because she was brutally raped up the ass

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How did the chicken get to the other side? He didnt, he got ran over.

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"Knock, Knock" "who's there" "John doe" "John doe who" "I told you my my name was john doe"

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There was a curtain who sneezed and then asked you for a tissue. He was in a room with two chairs a coffee table and a 37 year old bookcase, why did he sneeze???? Because he had a cold!!????

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why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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