Whats the difference between an elephant and a tomato. You put tomatos in a salad.

How many Legos can you stick up your nose? I'm sure its very painful and considered stupid so don't try it.

What did the doctor say to the man on the nice day? You have cancer. How nice the day was is irrelevant

What happened after four homosexual clowns all squeezed into a little toy car simultaneously? Children and parents alike were amazed by this feat, and considered their $5 entrance fee very well spent.

What did the penis say to the vagina? Nothing, genitalia can't speak.

What do you call a rich black man? A auntrapanour who simply enjoys making more money than any average person

Q: Why did the kid cross the playground? A: To get to the other slide

Your momma's so fat, she has just been diagnosed with Chronic renal failure.

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

WHAT THE BABIES?!

what do you call a bomb in a plane? A dangerous threat to lives

Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange Who? Oranges are very good for you and enriched with vitamin C that is apparently good to intake when you are experiencing cold/flu like symptoms during the winter season and your doctor won't give you medication because you aren't sick enough and you already ask for medication to much because you think you are always sick with something. That's what happens when you're a hypochondriac.

What's funnier than 24? 25

why did the baby bird fall out of the nest? while the mother bird was away a cat knocked over the nest. needless to say the baby bird died.

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

How much weight can an ant carry up a mole hill? Ice cream has no bones.

what did the boy say to the girl? make me a sandwich.

Q: Why did the paraplegic go to the gym? A: to watch his friend work out

What do you get when you throw a bagel at a chicken? One less bagel.

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was tired of hearing that joke

why did the clown fall off the swing because he got shot in the face

Knock, Knock Whos there? Docter Docter who? Yes its me, Craig Who your docter, I have the test results back Im afriad its positive,you've only got a few months left

How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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