hey i just met you,but this is crazy, my name is kony and i just took your baby

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says "Well, it's a long story but I tell you. You see, one day I was walking along the beach and I found a dusty old lamp. I rubbed the lamp and a big magic genie appeared. He told me I could have 3 wishes." The horse continues: "So I told the genie I wish I had a 10 billion dollars. I checked my bank account and sure enough it came true. My second wish was I wished for a beautiful wife. Suddenly a light came from the sky like an angel falling and I saw a beautiful woman and fell in love with her." The bartender says to the horse "Let me guess, so for your third wish, did you wish you were a horse with a long face?" The horse says "No that's not what I wished for." The bartender asks "What was your third wish?" The horse says "Well you won't believe me but I wished I was a bartender pretending to talk to a horse about some genie granting him wishes." After about 30 minutes of arguing with himself, other employees at the bar had had enough of the bartender talking to himself and called psychiatric personnel to escort the bartender to the mental hospital as his schizophrenia is getting worse.

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How many bodies can you stuff into a oven? Who tries figure that out? I'm calling the cops.

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican with an octopus? Nothing, two different species cannot propagate and gene splicing isn't advanced enough to separate the specific traits of an organism.

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What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red painting.

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Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can probably lift more than 80 pounds

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Hi

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WILSON!!!!!!!!!

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How do you make a black guy cry? You kill his family.

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Why did the blind man fail his math test? Because he had been raped and murdered. Going blind is a side effect of death.

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Wanna hear a joke..... Corey Jacobs Scrotum!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor Ah, come in!

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Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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Why did the man stop suddenly in the street? His unhealthy diet, alcoholism and smoking habit caused him to have a heart attack at the age of 56. He died because of it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue, You are reading jokes online, Go make some friends, or take up knitting because it has many benefits.

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what do you call a dead black man? dead

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Nobody likes you ya noob! (-_-) *sniff* MAN YOU SMELL BAD

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What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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I love you, you love me. Barney is fat and not entertaining.

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i threw my line in the toilet the fishing was pretty shity that day

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Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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