What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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Whats Brown And Sticky?! My Shit!

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How do you make a baby fly? Hit it's mother in the stomach.

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What's funny about the holocaust? Nothing. Whoever thinks the holocaust is funny is a dick.

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W.N.B.A.

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Your mom is so poor that she collect food stamps is on welfare and lives in section 8 housing and cannot find a job that provides her a livable wage

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a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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What do you call a gathering of Asians? A chinkfest

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How do we stop world hunger? We must first ask ourselves: why don't people eat?

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whats silver and cries? a coin, although it can't cry because its a coin. So it's just silver

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How can you kill a blonde? Hack her to bits.

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There's an Irishman, a homosexual, and a Jew standing at a bar. What a fine example of an integrated community.

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What do you call a deer with no eye? NO IDEAR!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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A man walks into a bar and takes his seat. After a minute, someone shouts "133!" and this is followed by a couple of slight chuckles around the room. Later, "57!" is heard from the corner, followed by harsh laughter. After a while, someone shouts "66!" which is met by an uproar of uncontrollable laughter. The man, confused by the evening's events, asks the barmam what is going on. The barman explains, every joke has been told countless times so instead of reciting them, they are numbered and people call out the numbers. The man catches on to this, and therefore shouts "453!" which is followed by a deadly silence, because no one had heard that particular joke before, so 453 was just a number to them.

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your dad's gay. just let that sink in.

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? None. While they were figuring out who to change the bulb the bulb lit a spark and the house caught fire. Everyone but one died. The black guy couldn't change the bulb because the bulb was lost in the fire.

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whats worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it? being raped by justin beiber

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Why did Alice fail Maths? Because everybody else was Asian.

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What did the moon say to the sun? "I am the moon."

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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There is a British man, a Mexican man,and a American man on a boat. The captain sad the boat is carrying to much weight so the each have to throw off something they have to much of. The Brit throws tea, The Mexican throws tacos, and The American throws the Mexican.

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How can you tell if someone is gay? It depends, sometimes they can be flamboyant or not. Actually, one could be straight and still be flamboyant, that's what makes the world less boring. Everyone is different, there's no surefire way of knowing, unless of course they tell you that they're gay.

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How do you kill Osama Bin Laden? Get The Navy Seals To Infiltrate his compound.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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