- Anti Joke

a woman votes!

A very depressed man walks into a bar, sits down, and gives the bartender his credit card and says, "Keep giving me beers until I pass out." The bartender asks, "What's wrong Buddy? You can talk to me!" The depressed man explains that he was fired, his wife has been cheating on him for the past 2 years, both his daughters ran away and became prostitutes, his mother died after choking on his father's Genitals and the father had just been diagnosed with both brain and testicular cancer and will die within the week, his sister was kidnapped and sold into a sex slave market and has been missing for the past year, his brother confessed to being gay and committed suicide with his lover (male) after learning that their state did not accept gay marriage. He pauses to drink his beer, then continues on to say that he has been convicted of sexually assaulting a child even though he was innocent, his dog had just been run over by a tractor trailer with no physical body left to bury, his cat had gotten stuck in the garbage disposal and he turned it on without knowledge that the cat was sleeping inside. The man looks at the bartender and started to laugh and cry at his misfortune, he then said,"... And to top it all off i just spent the past 2 hours explaining this to a deaf bartender!" The man then went home and hung himself on the telephone pole outside his house. At the funeral only the bartender,who attended, spoke on his behalf, reciting the man's terrible life, then ending by saying, "This man death has motivated me to search for a cure to this rare Delusional Disorder."

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

If life throws you melons, you might be dyslexic.

A man walks into a bar, Esept it wasn't a bar and he was running.

How do you get twenty black men in a tiny car? Saw them into pieces.

What do you call a drunk cannibalistic Jew? A HeBrew!

Seeing you happy is what makes me happy Nero, it has always been this way.

Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

What did the teacher say to the kid who got a 0 on a multiple choice spelling test? Wow your really dumb. Idiot

What do you get when you jump into the Red Sea? Wet.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Your mom.

What do you get when an elephant and a penguin have a baby? Dunno, it's seems highly improbable.

What is the difference between John and John Nothing

What do you call sad communities that have to share resources? Communists.

George Washington delivered a short speech to his troops before they crossed the delaware river. Here it is: "Get in the boat."

Why did the black guy wear a hat? To keep the sun out of his eyes

What is brown and sticky? A stick

How did the blonde die drinking milk? She was severely lactose intolerant.

press a,s,d,f,g,h,j,k,l feel like a pianist

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? You take your boots of before jumping on the trampoline!!!!!!!!!

women's rights

What do you say to somebody that wont shut up Shut up!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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