Jacob licked out his buthole again. It was becoming a usual thing for him to do, it suddenly became one of his hobbies and wanted to lick more, so he started licking MR. Macs

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Yo momma's so fat that when she went to Seaworld and a whale saw her, looked away, and continued on with its daily life.

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Why shouldn't you tell a joke during an earthquake. Cause it is not the time nor the place to tell a joke

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Why do women get pregnant? Beacuse it hurts and they deserve it.

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CHORGLUND

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What's the difference between a park bench and a black man? Nothing. They're both capable of supporting a family of three.

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Why did the child get cancer? Because there was a family history of it.

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One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Is this the krusty Crab? No you idiot this is a phone!!!!!

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Why couldn't Jenny speak right? Cause she had autism.

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Knock Knock Whos there Reality* Knock Knock *Opens Door*

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Whats invisible and smells lile carrots? Rabbit fart

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican, a black guy and an octopus? I don't know but I don't like it.

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Why could't Jerry go to school on the Wednesday? Because he died on the Monday.

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Situation: A bear is cutting a sunflower's hair Question: How many kangaroos does it take to do surgery on a meatball? Answer: Tomato. Because zebras eat twelve kiwis in a factory every February 29th.

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What is the best way to run a race? Start out fast, run fast in the middle, and finish fast.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm homosexual And so is my boyfriend Jeremy, with whom I have shared countless evenings of joy and laughter.

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Hey what did you do on The weekend??? I got hit by a bus!

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What do you call a black man with pantyhose on his head. A white guy in the dark with black pantyhose on his head

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What is small, black and has 18 legs? A centipede with 82 legs cut off.

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knock! knock! Who's there ...So y do you have a peep whole?

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What do you call a wine-o? A Alco-colic.

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Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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