what's brown and sticky A stick!

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Two penguins sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap." The other says, "What do you think I am, a clock!?!?"

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Why did the murderer buy a lizard? He thought that they were cute.

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Why can't vegetarians eat mushrooms because I can't urinate over a scotch bonnet :/

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Why did the chicken cross the road? like most animals that wander onto the road, it was completely unaware that the road can be very dangerous. It didn't go onto the road on purpose, it simply treated the road as if it was just like the rest of the ground.

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What's blue and smells like yellow paint? Blue paint.

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A Dyslexic man went to a posh, bought a badnana, and put it no his neck, and lawked around twon.

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What do you call a kid with headgear and one leg? Names.

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why did the girl cry while watching starwars? She was being raped

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Justin Beiber's Talent.

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Whats white and all over my room? paint

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What looks like half a loaf of bread. The other half

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A fat guy at starbucks, waiting for his regular 160lbs breakfest. why is the 10 black kid crying? he's hungry and there is no starbucks in somalia .

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Everyone lies about agreeing to the terms of service... look, I'll do it right now! because i have to click it in order to post the joke.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing set? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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You know what they say about priests with big rosaries? I don't know, it's in Latin.

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What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

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What's the difference between a freezer and a baby? A freezer doesn't scream when I pack my meat into it.

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Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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Whats the difference between Rolf Harris and a pedophile Whoops I didn't quite think this one through

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? because 7 brutally beat and raped 9

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What did the kid with cancer get for Christmas? A visit from the Make a Wish Foundation and the opportunity to see her favorite band in concert. Unfortunately, she was very ill from the chemotherapy, and was unable to really enjoy herself at the concert. She passed away several days later, surrounded by family and friends.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have cancer."

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What's worse than 10 babies in a trashcan? One baby in 10 trashcans.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops