Wanna hear a funny joke? I can't think of one at the moment...

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Knock knock. Who's there? Falafel. Falafel who? I falafel. You feel awful? Ha, ha, ha! Oh, what a kneeslapper! Oh, God! Thanks for the laugh, I was feeling a little down and I... No, I just meant I ate a falafel. Oh. Yeah.

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A man walks into an airport. He is sexually taken advantage of by TSA employees and suffers from severe depression for years after, eventually becoming gay and divorcing his wife. He then goes on a quest to discover the name of the man who took advantage of him. Once found, the man kills the employee and his family, commits acts of necrophilia upon his corpse in a slightly erotic display of revenge and stalks airports for the rest of his life, fruitlessly attempting to quench an insatiable bloodthirst for TSA workers.

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What would you call a guy with no arms or legs in the water ? Well you would probably call for help, because he would be drowning seeing as how he has no limbs.

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I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the divorce papers were filed soon thereafter.

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How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

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you know what hurts, a revolver bullet in your brain.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Irrelevant. The road is no place for chickens.

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Ask me if I'm a duck. Are you a duck? No.

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oh whatever Greece isn't going to leave the eurozone shut up about it already

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what is the most efficient way to scratch your balls? hire a leprechaun slave.

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Knock Knock! Come in the door is unlocked. I have cookies!

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If a blonde and a brunette are both falling out of a building, which one will hit the ground first? The brunette, she jumped first.

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Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

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Knock Knock Come in!

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What 2 differences does a potato have in common? They both have very thin skin.

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Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

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the awkward when you said "moment" in your head

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What's worse than winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Whats the difference between dinosaurs and skittles? Dinosaurs were killed out hundreds of thousands of years ago when skittles on the other hand are sugery candy that people eat when they are craving a sweet treat

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What did rosa parks get for christmas? -Racism

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What's the first thing that goes through a persons mind when they get shot in the head. The bullet.

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? Seven brutally abused and raped 6 as a child.

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Yo Mama's so fat Everyone is very concerned for her Health.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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