What happens when a PC gamer without a mic rages? ASDKFHQIUEWHASKZNF9324Y8PTWFSDIUHASDFADSFUFKASJDF843QADKJVNCXT%$W(ESDHDSFAAASDFASKLDFU8EWADSdsfalsdkjfhuewanzxcAJSKDFUIEW

How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? I don't know considering it was never done before, and that the size of the pancake would have to be taken into account. Although I would suggest you use a better material like wood, plastic, or metal.

A local police officer pulls up to tell you something. Listen carefully: Three zebras have been spotted crossing the Mexican border. He goes into his truck, pulls out a can of marbles, peanut butter, seven velcro straps and a rhino horn covered in glitter. Your mission is simple: Kill the zebras using your equipment. You will be rewarded if you have enough peanut butter to make a sandwich after. Go now... Get it done.

There are four worms moving in a straight line, one in front of the other. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied.

What do you call children with no arms or legs ...their names

I'd love to submit an anti joke, but unfortunatley I don't own a computer.

what worse then stepping on a lego? watching your son kill your wife

Q: What's worse than being forced to eat your veggies? A: Being forced to kill your parents with a carrot.

How do you get a fat man to go outside? Blow up his house

Q. What did the atheist ask the pregnant woman? A. You gonna eat that?

Q:What do you call chocolate without a gag reflex? A: Choc-o-late (Choke a lot)

How do you make a mimer to speak? Shot him in both knees and cut of he's ear

What's the differnce of victims of Brady and Hindley and a pile of dead babies? Some were born dead and others were raped then killed. Kelvin Yang.

How do you kill a blonde woman? Shoot her in the head

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

Q: Whats the difference between a Jewish man and a pizza? A: Jew's are humans and can feel emotions, as for pizza's can not feel emotions, because they are pizzas.

Q: What did the black man say to his Ex wife after she placed a restraining order on him? A: nothing, he was no longer allowed contact with her of any kind and thus could not converse with her

Two ducks are in a bathtub. One duck says, "Hey, pass me the soap." The other duck says, "What do I look like, a type writer?"

why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey wahy did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it thought it was a game why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? because it had no arms why did the little girl fall off her bike? she got hit by three monkeys and a refridgerator

Why can't Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish

How dou you find the population of mexico? Take a census....... By throwing a dime in the street!

Heyy everyone text this number 320-510-3277 Kay ask him why he poops the bed at age 17 .. His name is mike geier.. Haha

A black man walks up to the cashier with twenty buckets of KFC and seventeen gallons of grape Kool - Aid. The cashier says, "Do you want a bag for those?"

Let me tell you a story kids about Bill. Now bill seemed like any ordinary guy, he had a job a wife kids and he even coached the little league baseball team for boys. Well he had all the kids come to his house to celebrate the championships,they won, and he accidentally killed a kid while trying to hit a pinata. He had to kill the rest of the children to hide evidence so he killed them all quick and buried them in a 6ft. hole in his basement where they lay for 9 years today.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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