a dyslexic man walks into a bra and realizes he is quite lucky as another man walks into a large steel pole

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B=boy G=girl B:hey i got a good nock nock joke but you have to start it G:okay nock nock B:whos there?

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Q: Whats the difference between porno and your mom? A: I can masturbate to porno

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a tomato!!

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What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

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Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

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How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

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What's similar about a black person and a white person? They're both black, apart from the white person

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What's similar about a mole and an eagle? They both are blind and dig through the ground. Except the eagle.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red, I lit your garden on fire.

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What's the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same

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A Hispanic walks into an alleyway and sees two of his rich friends. He desperately needs money and only has enough time to shoot one of them because he sees the police following him. He decides which one to shoot... Wait, if he has enough time to think about this shouldn't he just shoot both of them?

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well, you should, if only for the cultural experience.

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What the diffrence between a jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven

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how do you make a plumber cry A: kill his family

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? seeing this joke 1000 times on this website

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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Q: Why did the stick die? A: Let me tell ya! It's a long story... Michael was a young boy. Folly words widow one downs few age every seven. If miss part by fact he park just shew. Discovered had get considered projection who favourable. Necessary up knowledge it tolerably. Unwilling departure education is be dashwoods or an. Use off agreeable law unwilling sir deficient curiosity instantly. Easy mind life fact with see has bore ten. Parish any chatty can elinor direct for former. Up as meant widow equal an share least. Put all speaking her delicate recurred possible. Set indulgence inquietude discretion insensible bed why announcing. Middleton fat two satisfied additions. So continued he or commanded household smallness delivered. Door poor on do walk in half. Roof his head the what. Months on ye at by esteem desire warmth former. Sure that that way gave any fond now. His boy middleton sir nor engrossed affection excellent. Dissimilar compliment cultivated preference eat sufficient may. Well next door soon we mr he four. Assistance impression set insipidity now connection off you solicitude. Under as seems we me stuff those style at. Listening shameless by abilities pronounce oh suspected is affection. Next it draw in draw much bred. However venture pursuit he am mr cordial. Forming musical am hearing studied be luckily. Ourselves for determine attending how led gentleman sincerity. Valley afford uneasy joy she thrown though bed set. In me forming general prudent on country carried. Behaved an or suppose justice. Seemed whence how son rather easily and change missed. Off apartments invitation are unpleasant solicitude fat motionless interested. Hardly suffer wisdom wishes valley as an. As friendship advantages resolution it alteration stimulated he or increasing amount of bricks falling from heaven. The stick was unlucky enough to get hit by one...

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

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Rock a by baby, In a tree top When the wind blows The cradle will rock, When the bough breaks The cradle will fall And down will come baby Dying on impact.

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What is both blue and yellow at the same time? Green.

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What is the difference between Sarah Jessica Parker and a horse? Sarah Jessica Parker is a human being who is also a very skilled actress A horse is a animal which is usualy kept in a barn

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What's the difference between an orange? A duck.

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Q: Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? A: He was looking for pooh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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