Why can't you tell jokes in Base 8? Because 7, 10, 11

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Why did your girlfriend dump you? because someone brainwashed this guy into believing this nonsense.

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Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

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A man looks both ways before crossing the street he gets hit by an airplane

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Why did the fisherman go to Alaska? The commercial fishing business is strong there and it was a sound financial decision.

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What's wrong with the beetles? They suck dick

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why didthe man's computer crash? the man has a serious porn addiction

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I blackmailed his family with rape from Ronald mcdonald

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If Life gives you melons, then I think your dislexic

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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Why did the Jewish cross the road? He didn't he died in Holocaust.

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What did the husband say when his wife startled him as she appeared coming out of the kitchen? You scared me.

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Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He goes to the restroom and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. He goes to the restroom again and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. Guess what happens next? A. He goes to the restroom to urinate B. He buys another drink C. He flirts with a very attractive lady D. Goes home and masturbates

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A fat guy eats a twinkie.

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What do you call 1 + 1 = 2? i like boobs

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Sally." "Go away, Sally. I told you I am not interested." Kevin slammed the door on his colleague, as Sally proceeded to find somebody else and move on with her life. Kevin later in life became a drug addict, and got thrown in jail. Sally got married and had four kids, and while she feels bad for Kevin, she is happy with her life.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because it thought that it would somehow increase its chances of survival.

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why did the onion fall out of the bag? ...there was a hole in the bag so the onion fell out

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What do you call a black guy running from the cops? Nothing. He was out for his morning jog and he happened to run by the police.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Too get to the other side. Duuu no one crosses the road to get killed.

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What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

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What do you call a gay mexican on welfare? poor

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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A ship wrecks in the South Pacific ocean. Only one man survives. He swims to a semi-deserted island, and is later eaten by the cannibal inhabitants

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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