What did Sam say when the basketball hit her face? Ouch.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "For Christ's sakes, Grandma, put your pants back on!"

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Whats the difference between your mother and a mallard with a cold? There are far to many differences between humans and birds to consider for this question. A small list might include wings, feathers, and mating habits to name a few.

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A father of 4 commits suicide. his kids celebrate shortly after.

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The geese of Growmore

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How do you keep children off your front lawn? You molest them.

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3 black men walk into a bar. They order their drinks, tip the bartender, and could not have been more courteous.

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A squirrel got killed by getting hit by a truck haha its funny cuz the squirrel died

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what is patrick wilson? smart

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From SpongeBob SquarePants "Hey Patrick, wanna know what's funnier than 24??" - SpongeBob "What?" - Patrick " 25!!!!" - SpongeBob There are a lot of things that are funnier than 24 though.

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What do you call a monkey? A monkey.

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You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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A tree walks into a bar. But it is a dead tree so it actually didn't

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josh simpson has cancer

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Commie. Commie who? Commie Johnson. We went to high school together.

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what is the square root of pi? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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A blind man walks into a bar....and a chair....and a table....and a wall....and a person... etc.

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Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

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A black policeman and a white policeman work different shifts, one is during the day and one is at night and the both get equal pay.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream on the floor? Getting the end of your penis stapled

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Yo mama so fat that her weight is starting to tear her and your father apart.

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A Horse walks into a bar. Bartender:why the long face? Horse:I have terminal cancer.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

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Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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