What's the diference between an African guy and a lion? Nothing. But the lion will probably eat the African guy.

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One man said to another 'I think I'm going to have a chinese tonight.' the other replied 'it is wrong to eat people, even if they are chinese.'

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What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

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I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus, the divorce papers were filed soon thereafter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ben. Ben who? Ben Dover.

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Two muffings are in an oven. One leans towards the other due to rising of the batter and says nothing. The other cupcake, unable to yield the cognitive process to speak utters nothing and cooks to an internal temperature of 175 C.

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I am black.

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What's the difference between a black man and water? All black men have water in them, but not all water has a black man in it.

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Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

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How do you make a bowl of cheese? First you get a bowl. Then insert the cheese.

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When life gives you melons, you know you're dyslexic.

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What happens when you mix 3 pounds of baking soda, 2 dozen cans of Mr. Pibb cola, and a live tortoise? It makes a terrible mess and your wife gets upset at you for getting the house so dirty. She refuses to clean it up.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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What did the pedephile do to the young boy? Smiled at him, said hello, and kept on walking.

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Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Neither do they

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What's worse than the holocaust? The Russian Revolution

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Real jokes.

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Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

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Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

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Whats long and hard? a pole

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Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

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For as long as i can remember, i've had memories

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I won the game.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops