Roses are red, Violets are blue, Dandelions are yellow, and so are sunflowers.

Why can't an elephant smoke cigarettes? They do not posses the fine motor skills.

Knock knock Who's there? Adolf Adolf who? Adolf Hitler. Are you a jew?

I was walking on the beach when I heard a man yell "Help, Shark, Help!" and I laughed, because I knew the shark wasn't going to help him.

Why was poor justin killed His mother kicked him into a pool of blood-thirsty aligators.

Hey, want to hear a joke? Women's Rights

?2 guys walk into a bar. One gets a beer the other get water.

Whats sad about a black women killing herself? She was my mother

Kid: Teacher, what do you hate more than supervising people in detention sessions at this school? Teacher: I am a vegan. Hence meat is relatively dispicable and I abhor it in general.

What's funny? Women's rights.

What is a girl with one leg called ( iliene )

A farmer goes out to the coop to feed the chickens. They're all dead.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? I stapled it to the first monkey!

How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her an anti joke

Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducked.

why did the blond cross the road? she doesnt know either

What did one deer say to the other? Nothing. The second deer was killed while they were eating and now the first deer is scarred dot life.

So Mel Gibson walks into a bar, and then everyone left.

Example of a pro gamer: A kid who gets all F's in gradeschool, dosent goto collage, gets fat, dies alone.

Q: What kills millions of people each year and sneaks up behind you unexpectedly? A: HIV/AIDS

how do you get 100 dead babies in a bucket? use a blender. how do you get 100 dead babies out of a blender? Doritio's

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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