what is brown and sticky? a stick

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Whats helped us not be mad at Osama Binladen. His death.

thumb_up thumb_down +82

Q. why didnt the boy get a christmas present from his dear grandmother? A. because she died on thanksgiving

thumb_up thumb_down +72

What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

thumb_up thumb_down +64

What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

Fuzzy Wuzzy was A bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy went through chemo. Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy was he?

thumb_up thumb_down +60

Person 1) Yo mama's so fat Person 2) My mother died in a horrible car accident last week

thumb_up thumb_down +60

What do you call 4 Mexicans hopping the border? 4 Mexicans in search of a better lifestyle from poverty.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

A Mexican and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks. Then they leave because it turns out that wasn't the bar they were meeting the Jew at.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

throbbing slobber

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Knock Knock Whos there? smell map smell map who?...really? I was in the middle of a phone call with my paraplegic wife's doctor, who was telling me that her condition has gotten worse and doesn't think she'll make it to the end of the month. You interrupted that in order to get me to say something that sounded like "smell my poo". Forget being allowed into my house, you should be worried about being allowed into heaven. Hopefully as you walk home today, someone will murder you.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people up*. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

The WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down +46

If you say gullible over and over again, it sounds like stupidity.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

A purple kangaroo hops into a bar. There is no such thing as a purple kangaroo. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

whats small, black, and crispy? a baby in a drier

thumb_up thumb_down +44

SPAMS!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A Poem that would be from a stocker: Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van and NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +44

69

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why did the man go to the restaurant? Because he wanted to get some food.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Roses are green Violets are yellow I have mental problems Doobah haga Blakatrabbit

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Whats 10+10? A mathematical equation.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops