Shit.

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your amazing just the way you are... even though you have aids.

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What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

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What has human male genitalia? A human male

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Why did the boy miss a day off school? He was in a coma

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he lost his grip on the branch and was unable to reach another before reaching the ground.

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What do you call a dragon that doesn't breathe fire? A Griffin.

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There are three men in a canoe traveling upstream. One wheel falls off. How many pancakes fit in a doghouse? 9, because ice-cream has no bones.

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A baby seal walks into a club. And is brutally murdered for a hunting round.

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where's waldo? in a picture book.

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Sea World Japan.

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What's better than winning the lottery? Winning it twice.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 1

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What do you call an insect that has 8 legs? A spider.

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I had sex with the Earth, and out came global warming...Imagine what will happen if i had sex with Obama?

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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What does does an elephant and a grape have in common? They are both grapes except for the elephant.

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25

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What did the boy with Aids pray for? A gun

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Waking up with a snapping turtle up your butt.

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Why did the chicken cross the road it was out of its coop

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Come in!

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What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

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A man is walking down the street when, on the other side, he see's another man, with what appears to be an orange for a head. Unable to contain his curiosity, he approaches and enquires: "Excuse me, but I couldn't help noticing that you have you have an orange for a head..." "That's right" says the man with an orange for a head. "I met a magical genie one day who granted me three wishes..." "Amazing" says the first man, "Please continue". "Well, for my first wish, I wished I was incredibly rich, and that every day, I woke up in a four-poster bed full of used bank notes, and a statement with twenty zeros". "Did that happen?" askes the first man. "It did indeed", replies the man with an orange for a head. "I'm probably the richest man in the world". "Amazing!" replies the first man. "What did you wish for next?" "For my second wish, I wished to be incredibly attractive to women, and that every day, in my four poster bed full of money, when I awoke, there would be three of the most beautiful, naked women imaginable." "Wow! Did THAT happen?" "Of course! To be honest though, that gets a bit of a bind - walking around is a bit difficult these days, in fact, I'm on my way to pick up some cream." "No way, that's amazing!" says the first man. "What was your third wish?" "Well..." replies the man with an orange for a head, "For my third wish, I wished I had an orange for a head."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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