How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a shoe sale at JC penny on the other side

what's the difference between a babie and a watermelon. one's fun to hit with a hammer. . . ht other ones a watermelon.

Once upon a time, You have a nice rack...

(Q)What do you call 4+4? (A) A math problem.

Costello: Who's on first Joe Girardi: Mark Teixeira

Morgan Freeman walks into a bar. Everyone is pleasantly surprised they are in the presence of a celebrity.

Why did the man jump off the bridge? He was clinically depressed and wanted to commite suicide

A man walks into a pole and freezes to death.

Men's rights

Why does LeBron James keep his phone on vibrate? Because he is often in the company of others and he does not want a ringtone to distract others from the current topic of discussion.

Whats the differance between peanut butter and jam? You can't peanut butter your dick into a chicks ass.

What's brown a sticky? -A stick

Why did the boy kill himself? Because he wanted to.

A man walks into a bar, he then falls unconscious and driven safely to the hospital.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Nick. Nick who? Nick Wyatt

A girl walks into a bar she is then drugged, raped and left in a back alley. To this day she still has psychological issues that are directly related to this event

Two men walked into a bar, the third followed close behind.

gesss what happen u promis not to tell anyone ok this is what happen !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOTHING

Want to hear an anti-joke?

It is cruel to want a "sky full of lighters" as, according to the Laws of Gravity, the lighters will eventually come back down to earth and incinerate everything below them.

A man walks into a bar. His alcoholism is destroying his family.

A blonde girl walks into a screen door. She is blind.

Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? Because she was lost in her thoughts about her dead husband, and how much he loved orange juice.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...