What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Q: What did the Miracle Whip say when the refrigerator door was opened? A: Nothing. Miracle Whip cannot speak.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why does my girlfriend pee standing up? Because he is a man.

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Hey! did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she...

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Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

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whats slower then a turtle A FATTY

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a boy walked into a pet store to get his bird some food. they were all out. the bird died.

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Two women were sitting in silence.

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Why is Joe white? Because he's white.

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Mmmm, donuts

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Why are "Polish" and "polish" spelled the same? The word is a homophone.

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Two muffins were in an oven. Neither of them said anything because they are inanimate objects. After they were finished baking, they were pulled out and set to cool on a counter to be eaten at a later time.

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Rosea's afre rewd Voleasts a/ere bluejw I ahve parkinson's dise'ase it ttook 4 hoiurs to w'irite this

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. - You don't need to because N and O are already together. - Then maybe a cyber-relationship would work. - Why ? - Look at your keyboard, U and I are next to each other.

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Why did the white man rub the black man's hair for good luck? Because it's good luck to rub a black man's hair.

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Hey, did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No He didn't either.

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What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

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Why did the passenger plane crash? Well, if not mechanical failure or human error, probably because a bomb was detonated onboard.

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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AROUND

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? The Police, your family just died in a car accident/

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Your life That's the joke

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Who is Red and White and comes on Christmas? A Russian Candy Cane

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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