A Mexican and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks. Then they leave because it turns out that wasn't the bar they were meeting the Jew at.

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What's 1+1? 4.

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Your mom is so fat that it's becoming a serious health concern...

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What do you call 4 Mexicans hopping the border? 4 Mexicans in search of a better lifestyle from poverty.

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roses are red facebook is blue you look f**kable so i'll add you by: matt

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it is common to find chickens and other wild and/or domesticated animals roaming through the streets in a multitude of countries.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

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Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road? it said WALK.

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A man is walking on a beach when he finds a golden lamp. He rubs it and a genie comes out. The genie tells the man he will grant three wishes. The man wastes his wishes on material goods that do not bring him happiness.

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The WNBA

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out that because you were sexually violated, you are now a victim of unplanned pregnancy and have contracted AIDS and any number of other STD's from the horrible expirence that will forever haunt your nightmares.

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why does andy thomson speak that slow because he speaks that way

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Lightening never strikes the same place twice. But it killed both my parents.

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What do you call a racist guy surrounded by a gang of black pepole? Dead.

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What do you call someone who's black? A person you asshole.

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Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

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Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

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nice shorts.

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What runs faster than a dead baby? Almost everything.

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Why does my girlfriend pee standing up? Because he is a man.

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Saddam Hussein is the father of the mothers of all cultchies.

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What do you call a diving-board factory worker threatening to jump off the roof? Names.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Nobody. Go make some friends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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