What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

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Your mom is so fat, she has diabetes.

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whats red and looks like a bucket a red bucket whats blue and looks like a bucket a red bucket in diguise

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ME: HEY ZACH DO YOU KNOW WHO LIKES YOU................... ZACH: NO!... WHO.... ME: DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW??? ZACH:....YEAH!!!!!!!!!! ME: OKAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY NOBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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An Arian man walks into a German-owned bar and asks to use the restroom. The bartender sees this acceptable and allows it. Soon after, a Jewish man asks the same question, but this time the bartender said no. The Jewish man thought it was an outrage and demanded why, so the bartender calmly explained to him that the Arian man was still using the restroom and that when he was finished the Jewish man was free to poo as he pleased.

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My friend said that onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him with a watermelon.

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What is brown, smells like shit and on fire? A muslim after the bomb vest malfuctioned!

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Whats gets stiff when you have sex with it? A dead body.

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Did you hear about the anorexic with the yeast infection? Apparently she's really good at math, and if she can overcome her afflictions she wants to become an accountant one day.

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A: Want to hear a funny joke? B: Nah, I'm okay

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Q: why did suzy fall off the swing? A: she had no arms. Knock knock. Q: who's there? A: not suzy!

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When does the Trogdor come? In the Niiiiighhhttttt.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

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What do you call 400 black men rolling down a hill? 400 black men rolling down a hill.

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What is red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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roses are red violets are black why is your chest as flat as my back

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What do you call two men having sex with Oprah? Group sex.

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Why are white people typically not as good at basketball as black people? They don't have the hard work and dedication as those who are better.

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gay marriage.

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whats the oposite from anti-jokes? uncle-jokes. LOL

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Person 1: Knock knock. Person 2: Come in.

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I walked into a dark ally at night and ran into 2 black men They severely beat me then while unconscious brutally raped me. I then spent 5 weeks in the hospital in a deep coma.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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