What's the difference between a train and a lamp? A lot

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Q:What do you call a dog with no legs? A:It doesnt matter he's not gonna come

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What did Pikachu say to Ghandi? Pika Pika

thumb_up thumb_down +31

I'm gay. Great me too.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What's the worst thing about being homeless? Not having a home.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

What has human male genitalia? A human male

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did Gene give Carla for Christmas? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A kid with no arms or legs is stuck in the desert. Sucks to be him.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what do you call someone that is dying of malaria? someone that should consider visiting a doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Knock knock Whos there? D D who D's nuts!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Hey I just met you And this is crazy I have Alzheimer's Hey I just met you

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A black guy and a white guy are sitting in the bar. Later they will probably return to their respectable homes.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the mechanic sleep under a car? He had narcolepsy.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

whats worse the being in a car crash? finding out that your mother and father were in the other car and were fatally injured.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

what is a vampires favorite dessert? a used tampon

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock Knock? Whos there? akward neighbor. akward neighbor who?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A bar walks into your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why is the world round? Because oranges are purple.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

a banana

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Hello, ladies, look at your man, now back to me, now back at your man, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped using ladies scented body wash and switched to Old Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re on a boat with the man your man could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an oyster with two tickets to that thing you love. Look again, the tickets are now diamonds. Anything is possible when your man smells like Old Spice and not a lady. I’m on Sarah Jessica Parker.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Slavery

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops