Your momma's of a reasonable figure and weight.

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Person 1) Yo mama's so fat Person 2) My mother died in a horrible car accident last week

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"So, how's life in North Korea?" "Well, I can't complain."

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Three blondes are walking through the woods when the come upon a set of tracks. The blondes stepped away from the tracks to watch the train as it went by.

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What's 1+1? 4.

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A person walks into a store. He goes to a worker an asks "were is the potatos?" . The worker says, there on that shelf.

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My sister has to take a dump

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Lets go Detroit Pistons!

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What's wrong with him? He lit the flashlight at both ends.

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Two muffins are in an oven. Although they both possess the extraordinary ability to speak, strangely each remains silent, apparently lost in their own thoughts. Thus nobody has any reason to think they are any different than any other muffins. Later after they've been baked and allowed to cool, they are sold to a woman who eats them along with a small salad. She enjoys their chewy, hearty texture, and lightly sweet taste. She is completely unaware of what amazing discovery has just been lost to science.

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What do You call a black porn star from alaska? By their first or full name depending on your relationship with them and the situation.

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what did rebecca say to sabrina ? CALL wass !!

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- Knock Knock. - Who's there? - You're coming with me.

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What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

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Lightening never strikes the same place twice. But it killed both my parents.

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A guy walks into a bar and asks a nice looking girl if he can buy her a drink. She promptly rejects the offer.

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Why does my girlfriend pee standing up? Because he is a man.

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Saddam Hussein is the father of the mothers of all cultchies.

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Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

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What did Jerry Sandusky get for Christmas? Raped in jail.

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What is the first step in making an ugly girl pretty? Shave her genitals.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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What's black and white, and red all over? A police car. Well, maybe it's not red all over. Just that little light on top. Oh, and the tail lights.

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Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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