Your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it says 300 lbs.

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what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

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Q. How do you make an atheist appreciate life? A. Break his legs.

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Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road? it said WALK.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? it was dead.

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Why did the dog run away from home? His house burned down and his owners were killed.

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out that because you were sexually violated, you are now a victim of unplanned pregnancy and have contracted AIDS and any number of other STD's from the horrible expirence that will forever haunt your nightmares.

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why does andy thomson speak that slow because he speaks that way

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A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

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knock, knock, TRICK OR TREAT

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Whats long and hard? a pole

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Why did the passenger plane crash? Well, if not mechanical failure or human error, probably because a bomb was detonated onboard.

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what do you call the one eyed man in the land of the blind? You call him an outcast

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Wanna go for a bike ride??

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What do you call a racist guy surrounded by a gang of black pepole? Dead.

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Saddam Hussein is the father of the mothers of all cultchies.

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go go gadget

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Why did Ashley run out of juice in her house? Because she drank it all!

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Three blind mice walk into a bar, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? The Police, your family just died in a car accident/

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Why was Bill Clinton such a good president? He went to ifreeclub.com

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Example of a pro gamer: A kid who gets all F's in gradeschool, dosent goto collage, gets fat, dies alone.

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Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

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You know what's worse than finding a worm inside an apple? finding crack, too late to spit it out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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