What is the difference between Terri Schaivo and a basket of rotting vegetables? The rotting vegetables aren't edible.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass...I was just lying about the wheels.

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What did the man say when he dropped an apple on his foot? That might have caused some minor discomfort had I not been wearing shoes.

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Q: Why did the cat roll down the hill? A: It had no legs

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WHY DID THE KID RID HIS BRICK HE WAS BLIND

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does your face hurt? yeah, neither does mine.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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Knock knock! Who's there? It's me, Allison. Oh, come in!

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What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

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What did the mole say? Nothing

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What's brown, dusty, and full of male? My asshole.

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Your dad is so dumb he tried to put M&M's in abc order

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What's the best part about seventeen-year-olds? There's seven of them.

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Your mom is so fat she should be concerned about her increased risk of heart failure.

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why was the asian kid found dead? he failed an examen

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What do you get when you multiply a trillion times a billion times a quintillion? A huge ass number.

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Rose's Are Red Violet's are Blue You Should Be In A Zoo Dont Worry Ill Be There Too But I Wont Be In A Cage With You Ill Be Laughing At You.

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Why did the todler fall over? He's an iraqi child and has ben shot inboth legs being readied fro public excution for fighting on the opposing side a.w. j.p.

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What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Finding a repeated joke about no armed susy falling off a swing.

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why did the bananan explode? it was a grenade

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what's the difference between a babie and a watermelon. one's fun to hit with a hammer. . . ht other ones a watermelon.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What happens when you are caught in the serious offense of killing somebody with intent? You get in trouble.

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What do I smell like to you?? Crap.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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