roses are red violetes are blue you need to shut up or I will kill you

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Milk, milk, lemonade, around the corner there is no god and everybody hates you.

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jess yawns with no hands in front of her mouth. true story.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He said it was a great place to retire.

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what is red and looks like blue paint? red paint.

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Q: why did sally fall off the swing A: she had no arms A:knock knock Q:who is there A:not sally

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hahaha

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Women's Golf

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Knock Knock. Go away!

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Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

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Why did the old man step on the caterpillar? For fun.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and and no legs in front of a door? A: A quadruple amputee.

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ME: HEY ZACH DO YOU KNOW WHO LIKES YOU................... ZACH: NO!... WHO.... ME: DO YOU REALLY WANT TO KNOW??? ZACH:....YEAH!!!!!!!!!! ME: OKAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY NOBODY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? seriously all my friends r Dbags n break the door down...wow ur polite....um ok WHO'S THERE? THE REAPER oh sh** dude! NO ONES HOME! "in other news this evening, two local men found dead on theyre living room floors. Police say the front door was smashed in...an obvious sign of forced entry. The two men were apparently reading a webpage called anti-joke before suddenly having an unexplained heart attack and dieing....heh heh hey nancy...why did the chicken cross the road? because he thuroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic." "HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.......GASP! GA FA! GAA *gargle*" "wow...in other OTHER news i just killed nancy...."*runs* JOKES KILL >:}

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What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? One crawling out of the bottom licking its lips.

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why was the asian kid found dead? he failed an examen

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what did the ninja say to the watermelon ? nothing

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what do you call a cucumber that is wearing a dress.... an asian lady

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Q:Where does a woman work at if she has a job? A: IHOP!!!

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Why did the black guy jump into the pool? Because he wanted to go swimming

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Why did the man jump off the bridge? He was clinically depressed and wanted to commite suicide

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Brittney Spears

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What did the cheese say to his friend, who was also a cheese, before the cheese took a picture? ''Cheese''.

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Costello: Who's on first Joe Girardi: Mark Teixeira

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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