I honestly have no idea what is upsetting you, why would I lie about my name? Please don't leave, you do remember me don't you? Can I call you over?

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How do you make someone laugh at a funeral? Laughing gas How do you make someone cry at a birthday party? Tear gas How do you make someone high at a wedding? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - There are many ways to get high in a wedding. Gas is not the only option.

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You have 37 candy bars and you give your friend 12. What is the square route of the sun? Yes

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Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

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A black man walked into a bar. He cashed in big on workers comp.

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What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophob? a blowjob

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A: Hey ask me if Im a fire truck? B: Are you a Fire Truck? A: No why would you ask that?

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There once was a man from Peru, who dreamed he swallowed his shoe. But it turns out his dream was real, and he died because he could not digest a whole shoe.

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Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? Ones fun to jump on, the others just a trampoline.

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Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

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whats red and can fall on you blood from a hunted duck.

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What happened to the boy who tried to cross the road? He got hit by a semi-truck and died.

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What's the difference between a dead baby in my garage and a Ferrari in my garage? I don't have a Ferrari.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

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Whats black, white, and read/red all over? What? Michael Jackson after his surgery.

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What's white on top and black on bottom? Society.

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Why didn't the baby drive the car? Because its a baby.

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What do Molly and Sharon have in common? They both annoy me.

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How many fingers am i holding up? 4

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Where did Sally go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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A kid finds a bag of heroine. He is a good Samaritan and asks the nearest junkie if it belonged to him.

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Let's make like your mother and walk out on your family during pre-adolescence.

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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A: what does hellen keller say to her mom? B: nothing. she cant speak due to her lack of hearing and visualizing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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