A man shaves at least 3 times a week, yet he has the longest beard in town, how is that possible? He shaves his head because he's embarrassed about his rampant and patchy balding.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

WHat is the one thing an alcoholic needs everyday? Rehab.

thumb_up thumb_down +78

what is white and sticky a stick from a birch tree

thumb_up thumb_down

What is black and white and red all over? A black, red and white picture

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock, knock. Who's there? FBI. FBI who? The FBI. We have your house surrounded. Pervert.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is brown, white, and red all over? A part asian part white guy covered in blood after having her girlfriend have her period while they were having sex in a club in alaska near a military school that was abandoned and is now haunted but justin bieber took care of that.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How many dead jews can you fit in a hole? Ask hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

hahahahaha thats not funny

thumb_up thumb_down +16

My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's three times as dangerous than a war? Three wars.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I was watching Fox news.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Two sausages were in a pan. One says "Wow it's hot in here!" the other says "OH MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the 5 cent store clerk say to the customer? That will be 5 cents.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's big, an instrument, has black and white keys, and is located in the bathroom? I don't know. A piano. But why in the bathroom? Don't tell me how to furnish my house.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's the difference between Batman and a black man? Batman is a fictional superhero and a black man is an ordinary man of African descent.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why are black people so good at basketball? Hard work and determination.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was Harry arrested? Because he stabbed multiple children.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A poor boy receives his first wrapped present in his entire life. Why did he hate it so much? Because it was a copy of "Mien Kampf" Is he Jewish? No, he actually does know what "Mien Kampf" is because he is poor and cannot read.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? None, you don't have to be jewish to change a light bulb

thumb_up thumb_down +14

I remember my first "I remember my first-" joke

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a bed? A: The victim of a serious car accident in a hospital bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops