Friend's sister: how many seconds are in 12 o'clock Friend: alot Friend's sister: WELL THEN 12 O'CLOCK IS A REWERJAJSBDKDJDHRJRJFHFKRJRIDBDKSBSDJ *slams door*

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How do you get blood from a stone? Put it in a snowball.

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whats black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down a hill whats black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him

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Roses are red, Violet are blue, SURPRISE!!! Im about to rape you.

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What did the monkey say to the African American? Monkeys cannot speak, therefore it would not be able to communicate with an African American, who is an equally respected member of the community, in an efficient way.

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What do you call it when a black guy runs down a hill? A male of African descent sprinting down a geographical landform that extends above the surrounding terrain.

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Q: whats worse than ten babies in one trash can A: one baby in ten trash cans

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Customer: "I can't turn my computer on." Phone support: "Do you have power?" Customer: "Yes." Phone support: "Do you have fingers?" Customer: "No."

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Why didnt sally throw out her lunch? Her mom had a miscarriage, she was never born.

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Q: How do get a person to leave you alone ? A: Suck out his eye-balls stuff them in your ears to muffle the sound of his screaming as you head-butt him into a fine paste. Then proceed to spread or squeeze sed paste on to delicious food substance and eat sed delicious food substance. Then carry on with the rest of your day like nothing happened. (P.S. Just ignore any letters about court cases or arrests)

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why was the cat black it was a black cat

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Yo mamas so dirty she has to take showers regularly so the stench of her pungent body odor is at a minimum.

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Why is it called a tea kettle Because it is a kettle and you make tea in it

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*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean? Dead.

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What's the difference between a Pimple and a Priest? One waits till you're 13 to "come" on your face.

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whats better than 7 babies in one trash can 1 baby in 7 trash cans

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HNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGH

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violets are red my name is bob this poem makes no sense microwave

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Why was Bill Clinton such a good president? He went to ifreeclub.com

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4

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What is the difference between a black guy and a road? One you put tar on and the other one is a road

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

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A bear and a rabbit both take a dump in the woods below an old oak tree. They look at each other, smile and nod their heads in acknowledgment of one another. The bear is first to let go of his rather large load and a loud THUMP is heard throughout the woods. Shortly after another and then another. The rabbit looks at the bear for a moment then turns closes his eyes and begins to strain. Finally the sound of what can only be described as a machine gun rattles through the wood. Looking impressed the bear looks over at the rabbit as it pops off its last few pellets. When the rabbit is finished the bear asks "Do you have a problem with the shit sticking to your fur?" The rabbit thinks for a moment then looks at the bear and says "Umm... No, not really." So the bear uses the rabbit to wipe his arse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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