A kid finds a bag of heroine. He is a good Samaritan and asks the nearest junkie if it belonged to him.

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Knock Knock. To get to the other side.

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-What do you call a pyromaniac on a golf course? *** I backed over your cat. -A FIREHAZ- wait what?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

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what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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If you know someone with the last name Schmidt. ALWAYS ask him to take a Schmidt on your chest

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Boy: Is your body from McDonalds ? Girl: Aww is it because your lovin' it? Boy: No, it's because your greasy and fat!

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http://www.fotokristall.narod.ru/mov0001.swf

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A black man walks into a store with a ski mask on... what does he do?? he buys skiis.

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Q What did Stevens mum say when he asked to be an astronaut A no your heads too big

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I baked a pie once. Guess what flavor it was. PIE FLAVOR!

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

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whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? i know how to make a pizza

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So, a black guy walked into a bar. "Ouch," he said.

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Knock Knock Who's There Carly Carly Who Hey I just met you, and this is crazy So here's my number and call me maybe

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What is big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater.

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what does a granny look best in? 1950

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Two Naked men jump off a cliff. Three months later, an entire pack of Cub Scouts were enrolled in group therapy. It's ongoing.

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Why did the man cross the road? To attend his wife's funeral.

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UNICORNZ R PURPUL

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Q. How do you get a dinosaur off a slide? A. You tell him he hasn't lived for billions of years.

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How do you make a dyke moan? Insert a BEAVER in it!

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What's black and is hanging from a tree in my backyard? Avocados.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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