How do you get your little brother to stop kicking you? Stick his feet in the garbage disposal.

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what did one gagged man say to the other gagged man? nothing he was gagged

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I am back with more jokes! -Lets go Mets It is best to dislike this one

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what's the difference between an abortion clinic and my basement? there are more dead fetuses in my basement

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Your moms so stupid she ate all the food in the grocery store

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Yo momma's so fat, she had a heart attack and is currently hospitalized.

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An English man, Irish man and a Scotsman walk into a bar. And have a wonderful evening of multicultural entertainment and fun together.

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Why did the teacher ask her student about the test? Because she was in the hospital the day of the test because her husband was hit by a rail road spike and died but she was so devoted to her job she wanted to know.

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What did the alien say to the parachute? We're connected

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Why is the sky blue? Because bicycles have two tires

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How did the blonde die? She got swallowed whole by a 1,000-foot scorpion.

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What did the lion say to the Octopus? Nothing, lion's can't speak. And even if they did, the chances of one ever encountering an octopus are very slim.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Gestapo

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Q; Why did the gas station attendant scream when 3 black men walked into his store? A: It was his surprise birthday party.

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What did Tom get for Christmas? Gloves, but Tom had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? NOT TOM

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If the blue dog falls out of sample object, how many bananas does my mom eat? No, because markers can't talk

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Why did the duck cross the road? Hurricane Katrina

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Why did Hitler commit suicide? Because the Nazis were on the brink of losing the war and Berlin was shortly to be captured by Soviet forces.

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What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

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What do you call a man with a horse? A man

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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What did the African Man get in Africa Aids

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How do you stop a black man from drowning Get your foot off of his head

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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