What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink? What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink?

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Why is that man such a perv? I don't know. Ever since I let him see my boobs, he has had this undying obsession with sex. So, I guess that, as society would classify him, he is a sex addict. He will do anything for it, even if he needs a man to get it. I feel terrible about starting his obsession, and plan to take him to therapy next week for the sake of his health.

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what did the black man eat for dinner? whatever his wife makes for him to eat

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How did the man rape the woman? With his penis.

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"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

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Pickles

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What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

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Roses are blu Violets are red Im colored blind

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Why did the Chinese man fall down the stairs? He was shot in the face.

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A tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it... Fall on top of a woman and crush her to death

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

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What's brown and sticky? Shit

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Mom: Are you going to jump of a cliff just cause your friends are? Kid: You got married to dad cause you were the last lonely whore left of all your friends. And you wanna talk to me about peer pressure. Mom: Go jump.

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Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? Because his parents are dead.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. There is an entire spectrum of the world I am not privy to.

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whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

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How many arabs can fit in a 2007 honda accord? legally up to 5

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How did the leukemia patient die? He was shot in the leg repeatedly until he died of blood loss.

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I'm sorry but your child seems to have fractured his spinal column and can no longer control any part of his body below his neck.

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they are all dead.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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Why black guys are the fasttest runners? Because the slowers are already in prison

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Do you believe in Santa? Cuz i don't. Kookaburra

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My wife has terminal cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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