What did the Pitchfork say to the Gremlin? Nothing, because its a pitchfork, and gremlin's don't exist.

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A boy has a penis, a girl has a vagina.

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Why was the man white? Because he wasn't black. All credit goes to Caravel.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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Why did the Chinese man cross the road? To get to the Chinese restaurant.

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Did you hear the one about the avalanche that crashed into the bar? It was such a tragedy.

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What's the new green? Green

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What has a pie and my hand got in common? It's got meringue on it.

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Why isnt there any mexicans on star trek? Because even in the future they dont work.

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer what did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that long.

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What do you call something with no legs? A Cripple.

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Tomorrow, today's yesterday.

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Why can't Lake Mossman find his penis? Because he's a fat ass, and he doesn't have any arms.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personalities So do I

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Roger D. ASS , stops, has a ponder , and walks out of a s.t.i clinic ,without being seen

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knock knock... who's there? your grandmother, now please let me in it's very cold outside. *you now proceed to open the door for your grandmother as she is elderly and you dont want her to freeze

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Becuase the farmer has recently gone blind due to old age and he acidently left the gate opened and the chicken happened to walk out

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an englishman an irishman and a scotsman walked into a bar there was no welshman. they didn't phone him due to his uncontrollable thirst for violence

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If life gives you lemons, don't accept them because you have a citrus allergy.

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"DUDE! THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR LEG!" "SERIOUSLY!"

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How do you prevent a drowning..? A: You don't throw the black man in the portwater

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What do you call a skeleton in a closet? The hide-and-seek champion.

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Homosexuals are gay.

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Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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