What did the redneck say about his missing tractor? Where's my tators.

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.

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How do you make lady gaga angry? punch her in the face and throw her off a cliff

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Three blind mice walk into a pub. They are all unaware of their surroundings, so to derive humor from it would be exploitative.

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your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? Whatever his name happens to be.

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A man walks into a crowded bar and orders a beer. The bartender doesn't hear him due to the background noise of everyone talking and the man has to repeat his order.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? No, this is Patrick.

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Two, one to change it and the other to hold the ladder so the first man won't fall and hurt himself.

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How many lemons does it take to fix a lightbulb Lemons can't fix lightbulbs as the don't have a mind,heart or any limbs.Think about that crap.

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a 12 year old walks into a bar she orders a drink and dies she then walks out of the bar

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

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Knock Knock. No one answered, as the person of residence was not home.

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What does an Eagle and a Mole have in common? They both live underground. Apart from the Eagle.

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roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

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An Irishman walks out of a bar.

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what's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Q. How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? A. 17.

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what is the difference between a cow?? there is no difference, you can't make a comparison between different object when there is only one object beïng named.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and have a wonderful time at what many people believe to be the most magical place on Earth.

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Why couldn't Ray Charles read? Because he was blind.

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theres a mexican women and a black man in a car....whos driving? nobody sadly the driver was shot.

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Jeez Bill, how drunk was I last night? You took my pet parakeet, threw it at my daughter's piggy bank and yelled "ANGRY BIRDS!!!!"

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A woman is terminally ill in the hospital and her family is trying to decide what her last meal should be. Her older sister suggests tea and the idea is accepted enthusiastically. The other sister suggests making jasmin tea and the ill woman's son also suggests toast. The woman's husband looks down at the orange he had just peeled for his wife and looks up at the rest of them. moments later he shoots the three of them and then himself. All were found dead. http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/local/2012/01/11/food-tiff-ends-in-deaths.html

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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