What do you call a banana that's about to be eaten? A Banana

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how many dicks can you fit into mia khalifa's ass

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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your momma's so ugly that she currently deals with an overwhelmingly self consciousness view of her appearance to the point where she has contemplated suicide and it is in your best interest to seek her medical help in order to preserve her heath and overall well being.

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What did the cow call the hen? A hen, what else would you call it?

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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I enjoy telling anticlimactic jokes Very much.

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Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

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Two women are sitting next to each other in a bar minding their own business.

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What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

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Why did the woman scream when she saw her brother? Because he had just come back from fighting in the Iraq war and she was extremely happy to see that he's alright

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Whats lemon scented and you shouldn't drink? Bleach

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting c- Moo

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Why did the man die in his office? Because a storm five miles away took down a power line that fell onto a truck igniting the fuel in it causing an explosion that started a forest fire that burned down another power line causing a spark to fly out of the man's phone and into his ear, killing him instantly.

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Your mother is so fat that when she went to get weighed she was diagnosed as clinically obese and later broke down into tears.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Yes.

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what does the pope have against homosexuals a whip

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A man walks into a bar, muttering to himself. People stare at him because his severe Schizophrenia makes him stand out in social situations.

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This dog can only sniff marijuana.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. This of course is impossible, as his ailments prevent him from walking.

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How do you kill a ninja? Shoot it.

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When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

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There's a 4 door kayak going down the street and it loses a wing. How many doughnuts fit in a dog house? And remember its not yellow, because snakes don't have armpits.

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What has eyes but can't see? A blind person.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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