Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't like anyone who is not a straight, white male.

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I like my women like I like my pancakes: Flipped over, inanimate, motionless, and covered in my syrup.

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Why did the terminal cancer patient die? Because he fell of the stairs with his wheelchair.

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What happens if you roll a nickel down a street in Mexico? It eventually stops and lands on its side.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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How did the man die? A gorilla raped him

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Arrow to the Knee

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? He was chicken.

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What happened to the boy after he ate a piece of Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

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What did Stephen Hawkins say to President Obama? He didn't his computer did.

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look at this bag of air it has some chips in it

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What do you call an Islamic man fling a plane? A very frightened passenger who took over flying the plane when the pilot collapsed due to a heart attack

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What happened to the little boys house? It burned down. How did the boy die? In the fire.

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A Rabbi walks into a bar. He payed for his drinks, tipped the bar tender, drank a few too many so he got a cab home.

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Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk and leave. 2 hours later there's a newscast about two drunken men who died in a car accident. It wasn't them, the newscast about them came shortly after

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Did you hear about the guy who got his entire LEFT side ripped off? He's dead.

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Q: What genre is the bible? A: Si-fi

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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Why is the average lifespan of Black men in the U.S. only about 52? Hundreds of years of oppression and a lack of nutritional, liberal, and vocational education have put them in a position where gathering the resources necessary to live a healthy and safe life are greatly is incredibly difficult.

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what does lady gaga have that some people dont have? a penis.

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Why does 1 + 1 = 2? ....seriously P

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The French guy and the Italian guy got in the bar at the same time, but they didn't talk as they didn't know each other.

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What do you call five dogs with no balls? Five bitches.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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