why was six afraid of seven? prison changes a person

Knock knock who's there? Screw this Screw this who? Im screwing this like ur boyfriend screwed you!

What do grass and cows have in common? They both say "moo" except for grass

A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected: a half-gallon of 2% milk, a carton of eggs, a quart of orange juice, a head of romaine lettuce, a 2 lb. can of coffee and a 1 lb. package of bacon. As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier. While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, “You must be single.” The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict’s intuition, since she was indeed single. She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status. Curiosity getting the better of her, she said “Well, you know what, you’re absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?” The drunk replied, “Cause you’re ugly.”

What do you give a sick bird? First-Aid tweetment.

In a joke book: So a man walks into a bar. Suddenlly the universe around the author crack. Unable to sustain the infinite potential of punchlines, the author tumbles through an empty void amongst shards of his broken reality.

Q: What does a Jedi say when another Jedi farts? A: Who sabered the cheese?

Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

Hey I just met you and this is crazy, but i have Alzheimer's. Hey i just met you.

Q: Why did the black man break into the house? A: Because he was poor and couldn't afford his daughters cancer treatment.

What's worse than losing something? Dieing.

You: Why did hitler go to hell? Them: Why? You: You're an idiot.

Hey we just met And this is crazy But my name's Kony And I stole your baby

A plane full of atheists, with one Christian, crashes into a field over Ohio. Everybody but the Christian dies upon impact. Amazed, a news reporter on the scene of the crash, asks the man, "How did you suvive this tragic event?" "I had a parachute." Responds the man.

a horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks why the long face? the horse, incapable of understanding any human dialect, promptly shits on the floor and leaves

What's black and blue and hates sex? The unfortunate child in a pedophile's basement who the police have yet to find.

What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing, the holocaust was a tragic event in human history.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has Obsessive Complusive Disorder.

What did the cat say to the chicken? Meow

the world flooded and everybody died how did they die? the all fell into lava!

Your mom's so fat that her doctor recommended that she exercise regularly and foods with nutritional value!!!! Oh burn!!!!

muffled-thud muffled thud who's there? Jeremy Beadle.

Why did the kid fall off the swing? He had no legs.

Knock Knock, Who's there? Billy. Billy who? Billy your next door neighbor, I need to borrow some sugar. Ok, come in.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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