what is the difference between the dead baby and the sandwich? i don't put my penis into the sandwich before i eat it.

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What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

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What did the penguin say to the tiger? I'm in the wrong country.

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What's stupid a light bulb.

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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Boy: Knock Knock! Girl: Who's there? Boy: It's me, John. Girl: Oh, come in!

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what happens when u mix a car, a blimp and a plane? I don't know.

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Why did Sally Drop here ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock Knock? *who's there* Not Sally.

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What do you call a smart blond? There aren't any so there shouldn't be a name for it.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I believe you've seen enough of these already.

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Life is like a bucket of wood shavings. Except when they're in a pail. Then it's like a pail of wood shavings.

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I pooped my pants

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first one says, "Pass the soap." "No soap, radio," replies the second one. "Oh, you want me to turn on the shower radio?" "Yeah, it's too quiet in here. I could use some tunes." The first polar bear turns on the radio. "Now pass me the soap, please," he says. The second bear passes him the soap, he washes his face and neck, and then they both get out and towel off. The second bear switches off the radio before they leave the bathroom.

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What is the biggest lie in the world How the **** should I know

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how do you make the president cry ?? shoot his family !!

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Wizard: If you could get any one thing in the world, what would it be son? Son: Another father that grants more wishes.

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How did the girl with no arms fall out the window? I pushed her.

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Q: what did the emo girl use to check her email? A: A computer.

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what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

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Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawer? we are both lawyers

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how do you tell the difference between a jew and a muslim? you ask them what their religion is.

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What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

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What in the world is that thing in her butt!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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