Why did Peter go to the dentist? Because he had to go to the dentist!

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What do you call a guy being followed by about 30 others with high powered rifles? A military general serving for his country.

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What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

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Why was little Jessica missing?? She was stuck in the freezer.

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Your Grandma and your mom drove off a cliff, who survived? Both of them, they didn't drive off a cliff.

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Two elephants walk off of cliff.... BOOM BOOM!

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Why did the orange put on the sun block? Because it was afraid of turning into a TAN-gerine!

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Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

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what is orange and sounds like a parrot? an orange parakeet

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An asian and white guy walk into a bar, the white man says to the asian "Do I know you from somewhere?" The asian says. "Yes, I used to go to college with you." The white man remebers him, and they catch up on life.

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your mom is so fat that she should probably try a deit in the neer future.

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Why did the girl get run over by a bus? The bus driver was blind.

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Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

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A teacher notices one of her students clutching a cat. She asks him why. The boy, tearfully, explains that he heard his father tell his mother that he was going to eat her pussy when the kids left for school. The teacher laughs and, the class being 10-11 years old thereby at an age approaching biological curiosity, decides to mix this in with a sex education video she was planning on showing them a few weeks later. She then phones the boy's parents who come to collect the cat while reassuring the boy that it is in no danger. The cat was popular with the boy's classmates and they would often go to visit him as a result. Many years later, just after the boy started attending university, the cat was put to sleep at the age of 13 due to liver cancer. The boy placed a Facebook post in honour of his feline friend, which was spotted by a former classmate of his in a routine search who happened to be attending the same university. They ended up reacquainting and beginning a sexual relationship, which was how the boy lost his virginity and eventually blossomed into a 37-year marriage resulting in three children.

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Knock Knock!! . . (There is no response as nobody's home)

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What do you call a man with a bad haircut? A man with a bad haircut

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why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a women

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I like my coffee the same way I like my woman with big tits I lied about the woman

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why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

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1234 5

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"Docter, docter, I think I have cancer!" "I don't really care."

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how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

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What do you get when Justin Bieber mates with a beaver? Nothing, the species are too genetically different to produce offspring

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What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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