- Anti Joke

What's black and white, and red all over? A police car. Well, maybe it's not red all over. Just that little light on top. Oh, and the tail lights.

I like my women like I like my coffee... In a cup.

What do you call a guy with no arms, no legs, and floats? Nothing, its rude to make fun of disabilities.

An English man walks into a pub.

Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

What happens if you fight Chuck Norris? You might lose or win.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Earlier that morning the farmer's daughter had inadvertently left the gate to the yard open as she was preoccupied by her worry over a maths test set for that day. She hadn't studied for the test as she was still deeply distressed over her fathers recent heart attack. This, coupled with the added burden of household chores now delegated to her because her mother was out trying to get the west field prepared for sowing, had made her quite forgetful and distracted of late. Whilst several chickens escaped, only one strayed so far that it actually encountered the road facing the farm. After crossing the road and gorging itself in a soy-bean crop, the chicken was struck by a furniture remover's van as it attempted to make its way home. Several hours later the dead chicken was spotted by a Community Mental Health Worker who was doing his bi-weekly rural clinic run. The chicken, being a bantam, caught the eye of the Mental Health worker, who was a keen trout fisherman. "Cool" thought the mental health worker- "those feathers will make for excellent trout flies". He stopped and plucked a handful of the most iridescent blue, green and orange feathers and placed them in an envelope. He rolled himself a cigarette, sat on the trunk of his car and admired the clouds. "God, I love this job", he muttered to no one in particular.

Have you heard any anti-jokes? ... Are you Jewish by chance?

What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

How did the lawyer survive the airplane crash? He didn't.

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Women have the right to vote.

What happened when a Black man ran into a white supremacist? They exchanged insurance information

Susie has Autism

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven

There was a blonde, brunette and a red head on an island. The blond was on holiday, the brunette lived there and the red head was there on business, it was a very large and industrial island.

What did batman say to robin before they entered the batmobile? Get in.

Why was the black person promptly escorted out of the bar? He was under 21.

Darth Vader: Luke, I am your father! Luke: Nooooo! Darth Vader: Yes.

Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: "Where's my tractor?!"

How many gays does it take to change a light bulb? 1, even if hes not happy im sure he would still be able to change it.

99% of teenagers would cry if they saw justin bieber on the top of a skyscraper, about to jump. However, there is 1% who would be sitting in a lawn chair at the bottom screaming, DO A BACKFLIP!!!

A bass player walks past a bar.......... "hey, it could happen"...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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