Yo mama is so fat, when she went for a swim at the beach, she had a GREAT time.

A man walks into a bar, he realizes his mistake and walks into the dentist next door where he had made an appointment to get his teeth cleaned.

What do you call a fucking idiotic douchebag with ebola? An ebloa paitent

Moral below, I understand you are one of us, but you are not supposed to act when I, your leader is spreading the message, if you want to risk harming the fundation behind your status as a shadow and its benefits, I suggest you cease signing your comments with moral. Moral the friendly neighbourhood r*pist: "Ruining the fundation behind the life of your choosing, will always end up ruining your chance to live and act freely, if you are a true shadow, then you will follow and obey"

Knock Knock. Go away!

well use a tissue!

What are the first three words in a Mexican Cook Book? Steal a chicken.

hellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohello

Want to hear a good joke? The NBA.

What kind of toy do you give to a dead baby? A death rattle.

How many feet are in a yard? It depends how many people are in the yard.

Knock, knock. The man knocking finds a note taped to the door saying "we'll be back in a week", the man proceeds to walk back home and tell his wife that they weren't home and that he'll return the rake he borrowed from them next week when they're back.

Why did Kelly never see Wass? cus she never looked in right places !!!

What do you call a low-fat banana? A nothing...

A man takes a prostitute to a hotel room, right? The woman is a federal agent, assigned to investigate high prostitution levels in the area. The man is promptly arrested, and now a large fine and up to 90 days in a correctional facility.

TROLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOLOL

If pro- is the opposite of con-, what is the opposite of progress? regress

you thought i was going to write a joke.. bitch

aaaa

How do you get money out of a Jew? You convince him your cause is worthwhile.

Whats better than pizza? Pepperoni pizza, if you like pepperoni that is.

what did the homeless man get for christmas? nothing.

What time did the tennis start? Tennish

Wow Nero, you never explained the process, its like I am at the ocean again, but dont lie, you still fear showers... Sorry its just not you when you lie to me, I know I should be more concerned about you, ill bring those old stuff, im tired, sleepy, I suppose thats your work huh Nero? Thanks, call it as a brother or what you want, but I really love you and wont ever stop doing so. Goodnight Nerochan, promise me you will take care of yourself, we all got a long life ahead of us, and I want to spend more time with you, if its fine for you and your wife.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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