Fool me once, shame on you Fool me twice, shame on me Fool me 3 times, oh now you're just being a jerk

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what did the Nazi say to the Jew? I hate you

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation can be known as fishing for compliments or reassurance of your value as a human being. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

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Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had leukemia

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Why did ned fall out of the tree? Because he was hit by a koala.

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Wanna hear an inside joke? Cancer.

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how many jews did hitler kill during the holocaust? too many jews

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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What do you get when you mix a teenager with a tanning bed? Cancer

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KARL KARASHIAN - FACEBOOK

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What's brown, smelly, and will never have a job? Poop.

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What did Abe Lincoln say before he gave the Gettysburg Address? No one knows, its not documented.

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What's the difference between a bagpipe and an onion? No one cries when you cut up a bagpipe. Posted by: BerserkSpoon

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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What is green, slimy and has 8 legs? Uncle Martin

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Nero, thank you for this opportunity, I desire to join the shadows, I left a thumbs up. Michelle

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Today, my friend threw a lemon at me very hard and hit me in the testicles. FML

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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what do you call someone that is dying of malaria? someone that should consider visiting a doctor.

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Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

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Why was a black person on the run, being trailed by police officers? They were all late to work; their work places were coincidentally situated near each other.

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A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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