So, I was eating out this girl Until I tasted something like horse semen. So I looked up at her and said; " Ah grandma, so that's how you died ! ".

What's the difference between me and a ghost? Ghosts aren't Dolphins!

roses are red violets are blue I forogt what I was doing where am I?

How do you stop your baby crawling in circles? Pick it up and smother it.

Drunk guy... Hey i just maybe And this is number But here's my crazy So call me met you

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Two apples are hanging from a tree. They are both picked, sold, taken home, washed, and enjoyed by a family of three.

Whats the difference between a horse and a snake? A snake is poisons, a horse is not.

Hello, this is Chuck Norris speaking.

A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

want to hear a dirty joke tommy fell in the mud a clean joke he took a bath with bubbles bubbles was his neighbor

A simple country boy and a hugely attractive young blonde sit in the same train carriage. They exchange greetings and pleasentaries, but are quiet for the remainder of the journey.

A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

girls basketball

Knock Knock. To get to the other side.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was holding hands with the first. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It saw a banana. Why did the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? It slipped. Why did the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? It thought this was all a game. Why did the sixth monkey commit suicide? All his friends were gone.

Mahmy

What do you call it? Whatever it is.

What do you call a guy wearing a white leisure suit? Mister Rourk? No, you call the dud wearing the white duds.

what do dead babies and turkeys have in common? you eat them on ocasions

Today is March 22.

What do you call a black priest? a priest, you racist

Why do women go to the bathroom together? To clean their filthy pussies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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