What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side of the road because apparently their was something on the other side that appealed to the chicken. It was probably your mom.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a pedophile

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What do you get if you cross a man and a horse? Severe internal bleeding.

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Dear Jim, I have a problem with my Hymen... "Jim'll fix it for you..."

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots? It depends on what his name is.

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A man walked into a bar. "Ouch"

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Q; Why did the gas station attendant scream when 3 black men walked into his store? A: It was his surprise birthday party.

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What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

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Knock Knock? Who's there? (No answer)

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What did mr. Mackey say to his class. It's easy mkay

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A chink walks into a bar. She is spotted by the secret police and instantly deported. Vote UKIP

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Person 1:"Knock Knock" Person 2: Whos there.... Wait why did you literally say the words "Knock Knock" Person 1: I have no idea

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A Muslim, a Jew, and a Christian find a magical lamp with a genie inside. He offers each of them one wish. The Muslim wishes that people didn't look at his people as terrorists. The Jew wishes that the Holocaust never happened, and the Christian wishes for world peace. Actually this didn't happen, Genies don't exist.

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What is the delicate way to start talking about your penis? ...that wasn't it.

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How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was mauled by a tiger.

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what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

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If i could rearrange the alphabet, i'd put my penis in your mouth

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hi im tom. whats your name? joe. hi im tom. whats your name? joe... tom has short term memory loss.

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Why doesn't my mom make dinner anymore? she died in a fire on my birthday.

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2 Penises

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What is black and white and red all over? A nun that just fell down the stairs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops