A hippie gets on a bus and greets the bus driver in a nice fashion Once the bus stops at his bus stop he thanks the bus driver and gets off the bus

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Knock knock! Go away. I'm busy masturbating, and it would be extremely awkward if you were to entire my residence at this time. Please return at a later hour.

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What's similar between my butthole and shampoo? They both smell good, except for by butthole.

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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What did the ethiopian give his wife for her birthday? HIV

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If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had several drinks, conversed animatedly, and heartily enjoyed themselves.

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Q)A man and a women are hiking on a mountain trail. A bear appears. What do they do? A) Die.

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Two Drunks walk out of a bar. They look down an alley and see a dog licking his balls. The first drunk says" Man, I wish I could do that." The second guy replies " Well you better pet him first."

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what do you call a black pilot? A) a pilot

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Your Mom!!!

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot

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America Votes

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What has two legs, takes away your money, and causes depression? A Democrat.

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your mom's so fat that even the biggest case of cancer couldn't brake through her flubber its so big

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A cat walks into a bar. What's the first thing it says? Absolutely nothing. It was knocked out.

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A man walked into my repair shop asking why his TV didn't work. I told him it was broken.

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What's black and self-describing? The words of this joke.

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Q: Why did the Jew have to go to a concentration camp? A: Because he was Jewish

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, It's not my fault, I found you in a zoo!

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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What did America get on the 11th September? 9/11

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What did Liberia say to Texas? Tag, you're it!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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