What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

Why was the baby crying? He saw a black guy

Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

what's hard and pink going in a soft and wet coming out Gum

Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and due to genetics could not see well without the help of glasses.

The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

What's worse than missing your flight? Realizing that everyone who got on it died from a bomb

What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing becasue a mute is a person who cannot speak and a deaf man ould not hear the jumbled mumblings anyway.

Q: Why did Grandma fall down the stairs? A: Because she had a brain hammerage

why do asian people eat each other? because they are cannibles

Incey-wincey Spider climbed up the water spout. Down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came the sun and dried up all the rain. But sadly, the spider had drowned. [L]

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

Whats green has four legs and would kill you if it fell from a tree. Pool Table.....

knock knock. who's there yourdrive yourdrive who yourdriving me up the wall

What can little Billy play? The tumour, sorry I meant what will little Billy die from.

How do you stop clowns from throwing cinderblocks at your car? Hire a hitman.

Why are black people so good at basketball? Because they practise.

What would be the consequence of a terrorist detonating a 500 kT nuclear bomb in Manhattan? A ridiculous question. All enriched uranium in Pakistan is safe and out of reach of terrorists, their govt. has assured. Please ask about realistic scenarios next time.

Your doorbell is broken.

A young couple just gave birth to their first child and the doctor says, "I’ve good some good news and some bad news, what do you want first?" "Give us the bad news first", the parents reply. "Your baby has red hair", says the doctor. "Well whats the good news", ask the parents. "It’s dead", says the doctor.

What's yellow and can't Swim? A bulldozer

What is 1+4x : No i will not take my pants off!

Why was the woman sad? Because her son died.

Q: Why does the man smell so bad? A: He doesn't shower

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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