What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

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Q-Jetski A-How is olive oil made?

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The 80's called. They need their couch back.

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There was a girl who was allergic to peanuts she ate peanuts and died the next day. She got hit by a bus.

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Flab

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The Walmart Scooterwhale (Terracetus obesitus) is the only member of the cetacean family to live in a terrestrial environment. Commonly found in large-scale grocery stores all across North America, it subsists mostly on fattening junk food, microwave popcorn, and beer.

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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Your momma's so fat: She feels uncomfortable in public due to current trends in ideal body shape and aesthetics of beauty.

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I cant find my anti-jokes this is also one

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What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

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marshal sterio had sex

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#Cutforbieber - Cole g.

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What did chad do when his friends came over? I'm not much of a fiction man personally.

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Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

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Why can't Jimmy walk ever again? Because when he was 12 his father mistook him for a plank of wood a sawed his legs off. We may realise here that this prohibits him from walking.

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MR MC CANN WHATS THE ANSWER

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Me- hey hitler you lost soemthing. hitler- Vat? Me-world war two.

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An Iranian, a Mexican, and an American are on an airplane. The plane is too heavy to take off, so to lighten the load, each person has to throw off something their country has a lot of. The Iranian throws off a nuclear bomb. The Mexican throws off a sombrero. The American throws off an apple pie.

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Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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Why was the girl crying? DEEZ NUTS!

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a potato a chicken and a rooster ate a cat and you just wasted your time

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Polly went out for a cigarette. Then she was raped.

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What do you call a white sheep with no legs? A cloud What do you call a black sheep with no legs? A shit.

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Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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