What do you get when you cross a Mexican, a black guy and an octopus? I don't know but I don't like it.

Q. What's the difference between a movie star and a manikin? A. Nothing.

yo moma so stupid she went to the dentist for a bluetooth.

What do you call a guy so fat that he can't fit in a bath tub? A guy so fat that he can't fit in a bath tub.

Roses are red Violets are Blue Let's just screw

There are two muffins in a oven, the first muffin is chocolate chip and the second muffin is blueberry.

I was once a hamster.

What do you call a bunch of balck men running down a hill. A bunch of balck men running down a hill.

Why couldn't the immigrant who was brand new to America hold a conversation with anyone? He was mute.

Male penises.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

How to you confuse an Alzheimer's patient? Present her with a complicated nuclear physics problem.

What do a Fascist and a Democrat both have in common? Involvement in politics.

How many dead babies can fit in a dead horse 11

Knock knock Who's there? The police Ahh shit

Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

What's the only thing more horrible than trash can full of dead babies? A live one at the bottom. What's more horrible than that? He has to eat his way out. What's more horrible than that? He goes back for more. What's more horrible than that? This all took place in my garage while I was watching.

Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

What's brown and smells like shit? Brown colour. I'm synesthetic.

Why didn't Bill go to the party? He wasn't invited.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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