Why didn't the woman cross the road? She died from breast cancer.

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Whats ironic about the Facebook "like" button? Nothing

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A man took his son out to play catch. The boy didn't even try to catch the ball. After that the man took his son to the amusement park to have fun. The boy didn't even try to have fun. Then the man took his son to the burger place nearby. Once again the son didn't even touch his food. Finally the man lost his temper and beat his seemingly ungrateful son and cried over the fact that his son was mentally retarded.

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where are the maternaty clothing in walmart???? The C section

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Why couldn't Ray Charles read? He was blind.

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what looks like a banana? a penis

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he died.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Nothing, shit went down so bad.

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*Guy and Jar of Chunky Peanut Butter* Guy; "Hey you're chunky" Peanut Butter; "I know"

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You can't choose your family, so choose someone else's.

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You see that dog over there with no tail? You know what that means, don't you? What? Someone cut it off.

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Q: What's worse than one dead baby at the bottom of a trash can? A: One dead baby in ten trash cans.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm gonna f*ck you with a rake.

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Q. Why was the little boy sad? A. He had a frog stapled to his face.

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A father and son get into a car crash. They go to the hospital and both the father and son are unconsciuos. The doctor comes in to the son's room and says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son. How could this happen if the dad is knocked out? It was a gay couple.

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Man: get back in the kitchen! Women: no Man: ok

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what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

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A woman tells her boyfriend that shes going shopping. Later that day the boyfriend sees her in an alley giving a blow job to a stranger so he says "What are you doing here?"

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What happen when a penguin walks into a bar? That is an almost impossible occasion. Penguins first of all waddle not walk and they only live in Antarctica and zoos, therefor they will not be able to enter one unless Antarctica becomes populated.

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A black guy, an asian guy, and a white guy jump off a cliff, who lands first? Well, newton's first law states that every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. So it depends on who weighs the most.

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Face...the other white meat!

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Jax vs Pig Jax: HOHAHOHOHAHOHAHOHA... Etc Pig *spinning head like neck is gonna break off* Shao Kahn: FINISH HIM! Jax: GOT YA! OH YEAH... BEASTIALI*Y, BEAST*ALITY? AGAIN?

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I pulled a disabled girl in the pub last night. The handle on her wheelchair was caught in my jacket.

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Why did the mans nuts itch he had crabs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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