why did the little boy die? He had AIDS

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Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

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A man made a sandwich.

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Anti-joke.

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wat did one chicken say to the other bock bock

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Why was Mary mucky? Because she was dragged to a field and raped

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how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Not enough

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Wha'ts the funniest joke in the world? Written.

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What do you call a cow that's holy? Holy Cow

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What happens if you fall of a cliff You die

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What do you get when you cross a sheep with a lion? A dead sheep.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have cancer, Herp Derp

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What do you a call a person who can't fly. A person.

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What's the difference between a white man and a black man? The colour of their skin.

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How do you tell if a kitten is alive? Throw it at the wall.

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What rhymes with float,boat,moat,coat and goat but can not be on a boat, can not float, can not be in a moat, can not be on a coat and can not ride a goat? A zoat because it's not a real word and therefore is incapable of doing any of those things.

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Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll probably just land back on earth.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

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I see you driving 'Round town with the girl I love And I'm like, Haiku!

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Yo mama's so fat, that she died from obesity.

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Dave:Hi Mark:Hi

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What did the black person say when his white friend said "Nigga!"? "You know, I really don't get racist jokes like this."

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A blonde went to a hair dresser's one day, listening to a walkman. The hair dresser asked her what she wanted, and the blonde replied, "I need to get my hair trimmed, just make sure that you do not take these headphones off." The woman looked at the blonde, surprised, but did as she was told. While she was brushing the blonde's hair, she accidentally bumped the headphones, knocking them to the ground. As she bent down to pick them up, the blonde fell over, onto the floor. The hair dresser was very confused. She picked up the head phones and listened. This is what she heard..."breath in...breath out...breath in...breath out..."!

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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