How do you get a one-armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

question:How do you call a Russian with Ak47. answer: Spetznaz

hi

What's worse than eating a rotton fruit that makes you sick?? Getting raped by a giant jackalope and then being left for dead in the middle of nowhere and being found by an old pedophile whose van ran out of gas and then running away only to find some water but while you were drinking it you got grabbed and dragged under the water by an octopus who has wandered off many miles from its home and then dying because humans don't have gills

Hey man. what? squidbillies.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

What's the main reason for divorce? Marriage.

Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

Why did the black man jump off the cliff? Well , you see, this black mans name was yargle, and during his high school years, people always made nicknames for him some of which were fat yargle, yargaryar, and bottomyarg. He thought to himself that wanted revenge, So he killed the entire population of earth. Oh ya, and since he was the last human, wirhout possibility of reproduction, he went to the store and bought a can of soup

how do you scare a deaf person? you yawn

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

What is red and tastes like parsley? Red Parsley

What do you call a frog with a bow tie? Cute!

What does a duck have in common? The further it flies the more.

thomas the train walked up to an old man and said nothing. mostly because trains cant walk, and they cant talk.

Knock knock Who's there The police "people began to jump out the back window"

[Jewish Joke] Some Guy: OOOOHH I GET IT Me: Anne Frank-ly, how did jew nazi this coming?

Why did the fisherman die on a fishing trip? He had a heart attack.

Why did the mass murderer abandon his killing spree? He found out it was illegal.

Why was the Librarian mad at the laughing kids?? they were laughing cause someone shot her.

Your argument is invalid, but I will allow you your opinion nonetheless.

Why is jim gay? because he likes men

why did the stupid blonde run straight into oncoming traffic? because there was a small child there that could have been seriously injured.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...