Why did john have to have back surgery He needed his back "screwed" up

Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers and the middles for you

Why did Hitler Kill his self Answer- He got a gas bill By Lewis

What happened when the chicken crossed the road? I got feathers stuck in my cars grill

Two guys are on a bridge. One commits suicide, the other one is called John.

Why did the woman fall off the skateboard? She hit a rock.

Snarf Nuggets

Yo mamma is so old that she died.

-What do you call a pyromaniac on a golf course? *** I backed over your cat. -A FIREHAZ- wait what?

Q.Why was the fat man sweeting A. Because he just ran and his body is trying to maintain thermal equilibrium

Whats worse than being hit by a bus and dying? Being hit by a bus and listening to Justin Beiber in a hospital bed.

What do you call a black man that steal from your shop? A thief

A rabbi walks into a bar, in traditional Jewish garb. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Sorry, you'll have to leave". The Jewish gentleman says "Why, don't you serve Jews in here?". The bartender replies "Of course we do, but we just found asbestos in the walls and we're closing for remodeling." The rabbi politely apologizes for making misplaced assumptions about the bartender's place of business.

What do you call a deer with one eye? Injured.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

I like big butts and I cannot lie. You don't know that. I may enjoy skinny butts. I may be lying.

Why did the jelly baby go to school? Because he was brought up in a middle class background and wanted a full education to further his future career

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Becasue she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Why was the young child dead in the middle of the road? His mother wasn't there to prevent him from chasing the ball across the road, and therefore, he ran in front of a truck

What's the difference between a battered woman and a regular woman. There is absolutely no difference...

why was the guy crying at the bar his house got bombed

A black man, a Mexican man, a Jew, an Asian man, and a white man get into a fight. Who won? Well since their dispute got all the way to a fight, I guess nobody really wins.

What did the lady say after she returned home from the grocery store? "Oh no! I forgot the milk!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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