What did the Atheist say in the church? His best friend's eulogy.

The AIDS patient was gay

A man came up to me and said," you suck" You know what I told him "YOU SUCK!"

why was the Jewish child sad? He was recently abandoned by all his family.

why did the banana go to the doctor? answer: he wasnt peeling well lollolololloololololololololololololooolololololololol i just fell of my dinosaur

Whats worse than being a jew? Having all of your friends viciously murdered at a party that you weren't invited to.

Why did Larry fall off his bike? He was hit in the head with a brick...

What do you call a black man driving a bus? By his name

There are two lawyers about to enter a court room. They look at each other shake their hands and then the defending lawyer smiles and says "I'm Jewish your f*cked"

Did you know Dr Pepper isn't really a doctor?

Alright so an elite group of Navy Seals walk into a mansion. They open fire on Osama Bin Laden and kill him.

How do you make a plumber cry? Make his family cry!!!!!!!!!

Why were the police chasing the black man? Because he was in such a poor financial state that the bank foreclosed his house and now he has no source of income and therefore no way to purchase basic living requirements, so he was forced to steal in order to provide food for his family.

"Hey, why won't you let me through?" "These tickets are fake." "No they aren't. LOOK OVER THERE!" The guard turns around, and then turns back. Minorly inconvenienced, he arrests the man immediately, upon which he is sent to jail and anally raped multiple times.

What do you say when a black girl asks you out? No!

Why did the man drink his own piss? Because he was Bear Grylls

Why did the Nun refude to say Thank You Father? Because she was raped by her father as a child.

Why did the 15 year old girl not enjoy her taco? Because the man making her taco was kid napped and replaced with a female that forgot to put cheese on it.

How did the Mexican get across the boarder? He applied for a student visa. He was a promising young scholar who had no trouble being accepted to a prestigious college.

Why did Kristi drop her chap-stick? Kristi was of the many children held in hostage of the Jewish heritage during the times of Hitler's wrath. At the Concentration camps they were not given the opportunity to maintain a healthy, average diet thus decreasing her body strength. No longer could Kristi hold her chap-stick - alas her frail little fingers slowly released the cylinder shaped tube and hopelessly watched it hit the ground. As it hit the ground, a cloud of dust swept over Kristi's body. At the same time Kristi was taking a big whiff of fresh air (just kidding, the air at concentration camps were not fresh - it reeked of acid) she accidentally inhaled the dirt which fled through her body and made her faint. She woke up and it was a dream, lol.

You're a fat chubby McChubchub fatty fatchub because your fat chubby McChubchubfattychub poop is on your fatty fat Mcphat face of fatchubness because you are the fatty lord of McChubby fat kings.

If life throws you lemons Catch them

Why couldn't the mexican buy a boat? Because he couldn't afford it

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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