Why do girls wear perfume? Because they smell and they're ugly

guess what I'm going to Spain on my holidays

BWAT

Where would you find a dog with one leg? Possibly in a vet's surgery, or in an animal rescue home or being cared for by a loving owner.

Hey

My wife and I have been married for ten years. She is a great care-taker and I couldn't be more happy. Then she asked me to make her a sandwich, I went to the kitchen and into the knife drawer...well I think you can guess what happened after that. I cut the meats, and I made her a sandwich.

How do you make a health inspector give you a good report? Throw his family into a pack of alligators.

Wanna know way i don't eat grapes? I hate Grapes.

Your mother is so fat that she got diabetes and later died of an unrelated illness.

Knock Knock Who's there? Gregory Pelnick

A Frenchman stays and fights

what do you call an evening with richard? a waste of time

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Sex

Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

Once upon a time, there was an ugly duckling. All the other ducklings made fun of the ugly duckling for being so ugly, and the little duckling felt bad. "Why do I have to be such an ugly duckling?," he asked. However one day, the duckling grew up and became........well, an ugly duck. Turns out he was just an ugly duck. The end.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his farmer was abusive.

Q. How is a monkey like a tricycle? A. They both have handlebars... except for the monkey.

Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

Person 1: Why don't you want to date me? Person 2: Because you are ugly Person 1: Why am I ugly? Person 2: Because you have bad features. Person 1: Why do i have bad features? Person 2: It's your genetics. Person 1: Why is it my genetics Person 2: Cuz that's the way god made you Person 1: Why? Person 2: Because god's god made you Person 1: Why Person 2: Because the god of god of god made you Person 1: Why? Person 2: That's the way the god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of god of (GOES ON FOREVER!!!) made you.

What is blue and invisible? Invisible blue paint

What do you call a bear eating another bear? A cannibal.

Why did the boy chuck a fridge at the other boy? Because he broke his toy train.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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