Whats worse than a dead dog? 5 dead babies and a dead dog...

What did the retard say to the other retard.. hey timmy how was work?

Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

Q-What do you call a woman in the kitchen? A- A woman making me a damn sammich thats what.

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

What's black and blue and afraid of sex The twelve year Old boy in my trunk

Bob: Hey, hey Jim Jim: Yeah? Bob: Remember me. Jim: ...okay?? Bob: Knock knock Jim: Who's there? Bob: I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA FRICKIN REMEMBER ME!!!

What do you call an blank test? an F

whats stupid and likes dumb jokes? you.

What did the child who tried to hang himself, but wasn't heavy enough to achieve breaking his neck do? Died slowly.

the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

I would have made you laugh, but that is not the point is it? Moral: What do you expect from the 4th most pointless invention?

knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

What did the dog say to the house? Roof

why was the girl in the corner with a knife? she's an emo

Q: If it takes a chicken a day and a half to lay an egg and a half, then how long would it take a monkey to kick the seeds off of a dill pickle. A: I don't know. That's a stupid question.

Womens rights

What do you give the person who has everything? A 20$ gift voucher

Why did Tim sit on the chair? Because potato.

Why Didn't LeBron James go to College? He was really good and decided to go to the NBA straight out of High School.

Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he was late for a meeting

I know Mandarin, He's a good friend of mine

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Because they're dead, they cant screw in a light bulb. Even if they were alive, it would be highly improbable that a baby could screw in a light bulb.

Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...