What did the doctor say to the female car crash victim? Nothing she was dead when he walked in the room.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he died.

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A man walks into kindergarden class with a beer. He then gets arrested.

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Why did the man drink water? Because he was thirsty

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Chuck Norris walked into a bar. He was greeted with much respect considering he was a talented actor.

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Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Dyeing of cancer.

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How do you stop a black person from drowning?.. Take your foot off his head

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A man buys a prius

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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If u see a guy with a buzz cut and earrings what would u ask? R u a girl with cancer

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What is white and square? A ping pong block

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What is funny about a child with down syndrome? Nothing.

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why did the zack fall off his bike because his mum thew a frege at him

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What us black and white and read all over The newspaper

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why was 6 afraid of 7? cause 789! no, not anymore, didn't you hear? 6 and 9 got together last night and 8 eachother.

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If you have 24 hours to live what would u choose to do? I would choose to take stander ised testing b/c it feels like it's forever.

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Its a long story, I got two balance nerves, I technically got four ear drums (relax you cant see it nor anything,neither can doctors without weird unpleasant stuff), I got about twice the number of synapses as regular people, and well, that makes me pretty damn good at some things, and a total retard at others.

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Your mama so stupid She has a 3rd grade education

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at it.

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAA

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Why couldn't the man walk? He didn't have any legs.

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How do you make a clown sad? Kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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