What’s the difference between Cool and Kool, the way you spell it

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Is your refrigerator running? If so, it sounds like you've got a well manufactured, correctly working appliance. If not, you might want to either have a technician come over and look at it or you should simply replace it with a working one.

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch names

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Your momma's so fat that she has a body fat percentage of 37 and is clinically overweight.

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teacher: what comes after 69? johnny: mouthwash teacher: get out.

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If there are 2 narwhals and two apples, why is each of the narwhals happy? Because each is a narwhal.

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A preschool teacher told his class to draw a squirrel. One child proceeds to break into tears. The teacher says "what's wrong Johnny?" Johnny said "my whole family was slaughtered by a gang of squirrels!" this upset the teacher

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if life gives you lemons...chuck them back and say i wanted muffins instead!!!!

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how do u fit 20 jews in a car? 2 in the front and 20 in the ashtray

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Why did the father not text back? He died in a car crash

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How did poor Miss Suzy get her poor little baby to stop crying? She cut off its head, burned its body, and sacrificed its ashes in a bizarre Satanic ritual that involved having sex with a heifer. (Miss Suzy was a Satanist priestess.)

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Why didn't Billy's parents get him any birthday presents? Billy was an accident.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Beluga Whale walk into a bar. The Priest says: "Well because today is a holy holiday, I'll take a glass of white wine to celebrate." The Rabbi says: "Well, because today I have to kindle thy sacred light, I'll have a glass of merlot." The Beluga Whale then says: "Ooooooooorrrrooooooommmmmmmm....."

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violets are blue, my name is Dave. this poem makes no sense. microwave.

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A man walks up to a horse and asks, "why the long face?" The horse stares back at him, blankly. The man then sits and ponders his life, sad that he now tries to communicate with horses and realizes that his eccentricity is probably the reason his marriage failed.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The more you know

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What's blue and smells like sky? Sky

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what has a huge nose and is jewish??? Henery Miller!!!!!

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Why did Jake have a bad spring break? Because he got hit by a car and died

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Yeah i'm into fitness, Fitness whole pizza in my mouth.

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A duck walked up to a lemonade stand. The owner of the stand marveled at how close such an adorable duck was to him and proceeded to sell lemonade undisturbed.

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What do you do if there's a black guy bleeding on your lawn? Help Him

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Q: Why did the man die of starvation??? A: He didn't eat for 3 days!!

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How do u bring a dead person to life? U dont.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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