What did the boy and girl do at the wedding? 69:)

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steves legs

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What is a bear's favorite televison show? It doesnt have one because it is a bear which makes watching television an illogical fallacy.

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A man walks into a bar. His alcoholism is destroying his family.

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How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen snort? Enough to kill 3 and a half men.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Why couldn't she get back up? She blew up

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What happened to the adventurer ? He took an arrow to the knee and became a guard.

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Q. Why was the dad sad? A.His favorite team lost in the championship.

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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A Quadriplegic walked into a bar,

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because it was a rather hot day and his attention was momentarily directed towards something else.

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How do you wake up your snoring friend? Cut his feet off.

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A man was walking outside at night and he heard thunder and saw lighting so he took out a metal pole.

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Why were the black man's balls so big He had testicular cancer

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A guy walks into a bar. He's thirsty and wants a beer.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Pump up the pasta You need bigger boobs

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

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what did the cat say to the monkey meow then he got hit by a car

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One day a boy asks his teacher what blue velvet is then the teacher says "we don't ask questions like that in my class go to principal's office now"so the boy goes to the principal's office and then the boy asks "what is blue velvet"then the principal says"no one says that in my school get out" so the boy goes home and asks his mom what is blue velvet then his mom says you don't say stuff like that in my house get out!so the boy see's the Mayer. So the boy asks the Mayer what blue velvet is then the Mayer says no one says that in my town get out of my town! So the boy see's a man and the boy goes to the man and the man asks what happend to you and the boy says well I got kicked out of school kicked out of my house and got thrown out of town just because i asked what blue velvet is! So the man tells the boy that there is a lady across the street. So the boy is in the road and then the boy gets ran over and dies. So the lesson here is look both ways before crossing a street

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Bob and his family were looking forward to going to an all inclusive holiday to Spain. When they got on the plane, a bomb went off, causing Bob to realise that he was never going to see his family again, and that they were about to suffer a horrific, painful death.

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What is the color of your spleen? I dont know i'm not a doctor

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What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Why did the little boy stop looking for his ball? Because he found it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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