there where 3 guys at a magic pool. if you jump in and say anything it appears in the pool. the first guy runs, jumps and says money!! he gets a bunch of money. the second guy runs, jumps and says gold!! he gets a bunch of gold. the third guy runs, slips says SHIT!!!! and lands in the pool.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: The farmer decided it was too cruel to fence in the animal, however getting run over by a car was a fate... not worse than death because it died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go hang himself.

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Whats the best way to take down a skycraper? -Crash a plane into it-

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What did the policeman say to the man accused of murder? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What do you call a blue duck that speaks? A dream.

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Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

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why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

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What did the Hungarian say before he went to bed? "I'm going to bed," but he said it in Hungarian.

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Why couldn't Ray Charles read? He was blind.

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What's worse than listening to a teacher talk? This joke.

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Q: Why was George Washington buried on a hill? A: Because he's dead.

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*Knock Knock* "Who's There?" "Delivery" "Oh right, I just ordered pizza"

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What did the Shark attack victim say just before she died from her injuries? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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fuck you you punkass piece of shit I hope you burn in my uncle's titties and ass rape yourself while screaming "make it stop!'. Then, I hope that you take a titanic needle and shove it up your lower kidney until it tears open and all your bodily fluids spill out into an ocean of shit. Also, I have 73 balls with a ballsack for each ball. So, I have 73 ballsacks.

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? -Its a chicken you dumb shit.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No.. Neither have they.

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What happened to the orphan on Christmas? he got raped

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Q. What do you call a small hen that can't lay eggs properly? A. A small hen that can't lay eggs properly.

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Why is Kim Jong Un so fat? Because he takes all the food in the country and sends his own people to live in concentration camps!

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Why didn't the boomerang return? It hit a baby

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why do blonds write TGIF toes go in first

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Whats the difference between a jew and a canoe? Canoes weren't killed by Hitler

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whats worse than finding out you have Alzheimer's? Finding out you have Alzheimer's

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops