What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a Mustang? I don't have a Mustang in my garrage.

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Roses are blue Violets are red It's fascinating what genetic engineering can do

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Roses are red violets are green i can't rhyme bridge

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I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man with no feet... ...then I made fun of him and laughed.

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Why did the schizophrenic chicken cross the road? He had to go to the clinic, the poor dear.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms. Why doesnt she have arms? they got bit off by a shark. Knock knock. Who's there? Not the girl.

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whats big and can vibrate after you turn it on? A washing machine.

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two parrots are seated on a perch. One turns to the other and says, "Do you smell fish?"

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Why did the business man jump into a mud puddle? He didn't. He was brutally stabbed to death then thrown in a pigpen in an attempt to conceal the evidence.

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Mmmm, donuts

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Hey, did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No He didn't either.

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HAPPY NOVEMBER 2

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A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

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Chuck Norris

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52 Prostitutes in a bar. Challenge Accepted.

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How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

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Whats bigger than a tree A bigger tree

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What did the old Hispanic man say to the young black woman in the Laundromat? I don't know cause I goofed in school and didn't pay attention in spanish class.

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Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? With the technology of compact fluorescent light bulbs they don't go out for much longer, so the question is nearly irrelevant.

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What did the blind lady say to her cat? Nothing she doesn't have a cat.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't.

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Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

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What did Batman get for Christmas. Nothing his parents are dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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