Why is the world flat? I don't know ask the Native American who was curious enough to take his canoe, go out into the middle of the water and never come back.

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Yo momma is so dumb, the tests came back positive for mental retardation and she has been given an expected life expectancy of 2 years.

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A lady was walking to the grocery store as she was walking she saw a old lady with a dog behind them where two black merses and about 200 women behind the merses. The lady Rushes over and ask '' Maim i am sorry to bother you but i would like to know who you lost and how?'' The old lady paused for a minute and awnsered '' I lost my husband and mother in law, Well My husband had just walked in to the house and my new dog went and ferousiously atacted him my mother in law had been living with us at the time she the jumped in and tried to help him They both died because of blood loss'' The lady looked at her with simpathy and thought i feel sorry for her husband and his mother she then asked '' Can i barrow your dog'' the old lady looked puzzled and said '' Get in line '' The lady walked to the end of the line as the dog was Passed to a women and taken home then passed back. When the women got her turn she thought do i want to kill my husband then she thought yes

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A man walks out of a bar followed by the people he came with because they just announced "last call". The man is the designated driver for the night.

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what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

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Why didn't the white kid go to school? Because it was Martin Luther King day.

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Roses Are Blue I Have A Gun And Ill Sout You!

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What do eagles and ground hogs have in common? They both live underground, except for the eagle.

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. HAHAHAHA I have control of you I don't enjoy that picture.

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What happened to the boy when he did nothing? The game.

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Girl: How do I know if I'm Jewish? Guy: Are you Jewish? Girl: No. Guy: There ya go.

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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What did the man do when he dropped his bar of soap. He picked it up

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What did the chilean guy told to the other chilean guy? Hola!

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What do you call a mexican who steals toasters? A mexican toaster thief.

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Sex positions (and other related things), never took off... 1. The 96 2. The mission (impossible) position. 3. The Tangoers party (swingers? The fack is that?) 4.Nasal. 5. Bed waltz (requires amazing dancing skills and multitasking, now they just call everything for "bed waltz" to show off) 6.Blind Date take uno (hard to find two blind people and make sure they meet each other and have a good time by themselves). 7. GILFS take one (I mean there could be many hot grandmas out there, but "Guns Id Like For Shooting", was not too popular due accidents)

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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April showers bring may flowers, may flowers bring pilgrims, pilgrims bring diseases, diseases bring death, death brings... Well it's just death.

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What do you call a fly with no wings? Disabled

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Why did the man fall of his bicycle? Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Why was the hiker upset? He was plummeting 1,500 feet to the ground after tripping on a rock too close to a cliff.

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What's dried up and smells like potatoes? Potato ships and school french fries.

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Bill: Did you hear about the black guy that went to college? John: No. Bill: me neither...

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What's 9 + 10 19

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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