How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what did hellen keller name her dog? answer: unnumnumnum

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Your momma is so fat, her doctor recommended exercising more and eating healthier.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A black man walks Into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Dave:Hi Mark:Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Wanna hear a funny joke? Sure. Me too, do you have any?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why does LeBron James keep his phone on vibrate? Because he is often in the company of others and he does not want a ringtone to distract others from the current topic of discussion.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than Patrick in a blender. Uuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, idk.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

I've lost my electron!! Are you sure? Yes! I'm Positive!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed off his entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

glasses, jacket, shirt They call me glasses, jacket, shirt man. I never leave the house...without my brodies. hehehe hahaha hohoho!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: Why did Sally not like her trip to Hawaii? A: A volcano erupted and killed her whole family.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A black guy pulls into a KFC drive thru and orders some chicken. The cashier tells him that they are out of chicken, so the black goes to McDonald's instead.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

willie revilame

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was the woman arrested for trying to have sex with a miner? Because he was on the job and her advances were completely unwanted.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did Alex fall off the swing? he had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -24

knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q:Why did the kid drop his ice cream A:He was hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One of them I like to eat, and the other one is a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Knock Knock. Who's There? The Landlord. Your rent's late.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you call a baby in a blender? The newest Doritos dip.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops