Why don't seagulls live in the bay? Because then they'd be bagels

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If life gives you lemons, steal the declaration of independance and use the lemons and a hair dryer to reveal the numbers on the back. Then enbark on an epic journey that ends with the discovery of the templars treasure. Lastly, use the money you earned to buy some lemons and make some lemonade.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your son has been in a car accident and has died.

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You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

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What would you call the Flinstones if they were black? Niggas

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SHUT UP JP

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You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

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What do you call two black men riding on a tandem bicycle? Best friends.

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roses are red, violets are red, ive been shot in the eye with a pelet gun, please ,please help

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A couple was arguing about how the man was cheating and he was in "The Doghouse". There clever son pointed out that they didn't own a dog.

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why did suzy get hit by the bus because she got dumped into the road and she had no legs

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what is the differnce between my truck and chuck norris? i eat my own poop.

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VAL SUCKS

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Guess what? AIDS!

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A whale walks into a bar, everyone says Hey, Ashely!

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The club cant even handle me right now Because theyve reached their limit of people allowed in

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Penis.

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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What do a spoon and a platypus have in common? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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Why did the priest fall onto the alter boy? Because he lost his balance

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What do you call a Mexican hockey player? A hockey player.

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Why did the kid want money? So he could buy pokemon cards.

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How to stop a baby from crying? Hit it with a brick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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