Cleveland winning something

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Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho!" Asain Santa Claus, "Hohohohohohohoho!" Pedophile Santa Claus, "Ho ho ho! Come and sit on my lap children!" Dyslexic Santa Claus, "Oh oh oh! Merry Shitcrams!" Narcopleptic Santa Claus, "Ho ho..." *snores*. Black Santa Claus, well, I wouldn't like the idea of a black fat guy breaking into my house, eating my cookies, drinking my milk, and leaving presents under my tree. Would you?

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Bin Laden comes out of a cave

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To hold their pants up.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? They threw a fridge at her.

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What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

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Why don't I ever lmao? Because my ass got bitten off by a bear.

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if quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? testicle

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How do you kill a blue elephant? How? With a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? How? You hold it's nose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a orange elephant? How? You can't, they don't exist. How do you kill a white elephant? How? You tickle it till it turns pink, then you hold it's noose until it turns blue, then you shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Q: Why did the paraplegic go to the gym? A: to watch his friend work out

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When Jesus came back from the dead the first thing he said was "It was just a prank bro!"

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A duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said the the man running the stand hey ba ba ba got any grapes? the man said no but i got some shut the F*CK up!

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How can you tell if a woman is dead? She has no pulse.

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Whats why was the 18 year old boy scared of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

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A welsh guy walks into a pub. This something any average guy would do.

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What did the man say to his son? Hello, son.

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Did you hear that Hellen Keller went driving? Now she's also paralyzed.

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-Knock Knock -Who is it? -Your father, i forgot my keys.

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What happened to the guy who dropped his soap in the prison shower? His friend picked it up for him.

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what is worst than finding a worm in your apple? finding half a worm in your apple

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Three blondes are walking through the woods when the come upon a set of tracks. The blondes stepped away from the tracks to watch the train as it went by.

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A blonde has a headache, so she goes to the doctor. The doctor prescribes some Advil, she takes it, and then feels significantly better.

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I walked in on my daughter masturbating. The whole ordeal was very uncomfortable, but I sat her down at the dining table to discreetly explain the necessity of locking doors.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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