A man walks into a bar He goes to drink away the fact that alcoholism is tearing his family apart and that he lost custody of his three-year-old son that same day

I am pleased and honored to hear you speak that beautifully straight from your heart Nero, you are without equal, unmatched. And he who is unmatched, also stands alone.

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbour. My neighbour who? Timothy, welcome to the neighbourhood!

Why does Michael J Fox have such good handwriting? Through years of hardwork, perseverance, and rehabilitation.

Have you heard the one about the dead guy? Neither has he.

A black man walks into Best Buy and buys a Television full price.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Doesn't matter. He was hit by a semi truck.

Why did the rooster chase the chicken? - They were playing tag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What's funnier then a dead baby. Two dead babies.

THEN WHO WAS FONE?

What's sad about three black men driving over a cliff?

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Blonds are cute and so are u.

How do you know when your sister's on her period? Your dad's dick tastes like blood

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

why did the chicken cross the road? i don't know u tell me

How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

What's the difference between a lesbian and a Pringle ? One is a snack cracker, the other is a crack snacker.

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I used to be an adventurer like you...but then I was diagnosed with cancer.

Q: What do you call a fly with no wings. A: Dying.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, and died of cancer

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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