What happened to the homeless man at midnight? He took a shit on the ground

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roses are red violets are blue. they both smell like flowers

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What's worse than a car going backwards on the highway? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

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A family walks into a talent agent's office. They do a cute family-friendly performance that they call "The Aristocrats."

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Why is a jewish man so tall? Genetics

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Why did a hipster walks into a health food store? To buy some healthy food.

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Why did the blond crave hotdogs for breakfast? She was likely suffering a sodium deficiency from violently throwing up the night before.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock Who's there Not Sarah

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What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

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So a man walks into a bar... ouch

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What did the orphan wish for Christmas during world war II? Parents What did he get? Bombed.

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What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Be sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

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There were three elephants in a bathtub. One said, "Pass me the soap." The other one said, "What do you think I am? A Radio???"

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how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

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What do you get when you rub 2 redheads together? Fire.

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You know what's good for shoulder pain? If you ice on for 20 minutes then off for 20 minutes repetitively three times a day

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Why did the black man fall down? A guy pushed him.

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How do you keep an idiot in suspense?....

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yo momma!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

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Why does Rupert The Bear wear checkered trousers? Because he's a twat.

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette was stranded on a deserted island. A genie appeared and said nothing, because genies doesn't exist

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops