I feel like am motherf***ing stuck in this dock and it makes me wana quack like what the hell is THAT!

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When life hands you lemons, make lemonade. Well, life isn't a physical being so chances are low that it will actually hand you lemons.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I am homeless, Can I have some food?

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dead cat.

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Why did the Black Man only eat one apple a day? He was trying to stay healthy. On an unrelated note he was under the poverty line, and addicted to an illegal substance. He does not represent African-American society very well.

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tommy is retared

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There was this guy who walked in the bar with one shoe. The bartender asks what happened. The man said the shoe didn't fit. So the bartender ask where is the other shoe. The man said he threw it away. The bartender looks in the trashcan and sure enough he sees his other shoe. The bartender says "This is the same size as your other shoe. Why are you wearing one shoe?" The man says "I'm just playing a prank on you. There's a hidden camera over there and over there. Is it okay if I can put you on YouTube?" and the bartender says "No."

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why did the mexican beat your ass larry clark III because you live in a apartment with your mom and dad who are black your dad has a truck your mom recked her car

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What do you give the person who has everything? A 20$ gift voucher

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

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What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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Why did the man remain calm when the judge passed the death sentence? Because he was in another country and had no connection with the case.

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A man walks into a bar. What does he say? Ouch!

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What did the pornstar do after the film shoot? Called her parents and said she had a good day at work as a receptionist at a law firm. She is too ashamed to admit her real profession to them. She then cried profusely.

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Justin Bieber is a talented singer.

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I'm not wearing underwear Why not Cause I have built in underwear

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Why were there bones on the moon? The cow diden't make it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Goodbye to the people who hated on me

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How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? Well none today because today is Saturday... maybe tomorrow

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I'm innocent its all Taggart he's the one instigating.

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first

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what did the girl said to the stalker? i dont know cuz if i did, i would be a stalker

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Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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