Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

why did the computer crash? it didn't

What do grizzly bears and people have in common? Neither can survive in outer space, due to depressurization, lack of oxygen, and absence of basic survival needs.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing.

Why was the little boy late for school? Because he was hit by a truck.

What did the ocean say to the other ocean? - nothing oceans are inanimate objects that are incapable of talking.

What's the difference between katchup and musterd A very long list of things that I don't want to read

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

A panda walks into a bar. He eats but then is tranquilized and taken back to the zoo.

I had my period 3 days ago.

What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, whereas Michael Jackson was a singer.

I told a priest that I would never believe in anything greater than myself. He said I had the God complex, that I was grandios. I stared him in the eye and asked, "how highly do you think of me? Thank you" and left.

Whats blue, flies with wings, weights over two tons, and has a rocket engine with six eyeballs? *hayball rolls* Moral: Im the one asking you...

Why do black people love menthol? Nobody knows.

knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

Why did little john fall off his bike? Somebody threw microwave oven at him.

How did Jimmy get hit by the car? He dropped his Ice cream cone.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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