everyone's always talking about the emperor's clothes, don't they know this is murica

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a lamborghini? Dead babies are not sports cars

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because it felt like it, now mind your own business!

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knock knock.. who's there? ted? ted, who? STOP f***ing around, you got cancer!

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roses are red,violets are blue,faces like yours belong in a zoo,but don't worry i'll be there to,not in a cage but laughing at you!

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Two peanuts were walking down the street and one was asalted

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Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

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What do you call a gay jewish guy? Heblew.

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

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Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

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When my brother was hanging at YOUR cross, he asked "daddy" "Oh father why!" Then lightning struck and the weather went to fuck. Moral: WHAT KIND OF RESPONSE IS THAT YOU PIECE OF SHIT!?

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Q: why was the baker a coward? A: his own mother told him his potential would amount to nothing more than a baker and when a dinosaur came into the bakery he ran away

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What do you call a bicycle that likes threesomes. A tricycle

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Roses are red Here's something new Violets are violet NOT F**KING BLUE

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How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? HIV

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why was the little girl crying? Because her family was dead

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you know whats funny?! nine eleven!

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How do you protect yourself from fire? Kill an orphan and nail its bones to your skin.

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Your mother smells so bad that she scheduled an appointment with her doctor, who prescribed her deodorant soap and chlorophyll and suggested she see a therapist for her chronic self esteem problems.

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Whats fleash color flesh color and fleash color? a hodo rolling down a hill.

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How do you get a baby in a blender? Feet first so you can see the expression on it's face. How do you get it out ? Nacho chips!

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What's sad about the Holocaust? well i don't know ,it may or may not have anything to do with you and cause absolutely no sad emotions toward the subject. I for one don't care.........

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What do you say to a cat with a helmet on? Silly cat, you rhyme with hat but you shouldn't wear one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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