If I have 12 backpacks and Jimmy has 91 pancakes, then how many marshmallows can cover the roof of this building? Purple. Because Aliens don't wear hats.

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whats black and has 3 legs? a spider with 5 missing legs.duh.

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What happened to the chicken crossing the road? She found a male chicken, had many babies and lived happily forever after.

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Too bad, because UNTIL YOUR FUCKING "POWER OF HUMAN KIND" CAN SUMMON UP A FUCKING EYEBALL! NOTHING WILL MAKE UP FOR THIS SHIT! "Oh, my the good old phonebook, I will... Now... try... to... seduce... you... with... my... "goodness" As far as "oh I know where you live", well nobody here is hiding fagface! So you come out of your "darkness or shadows or whatever" and let me stab out both your fucking eyes! And we are STILL NOT GOOD! And yeah, have your faggots stop calling themselves Nero.

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Knock knock. Who isn't there? Not me. Don't come in. I won't.

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What do you call Bilbo Baggins when you use him for pleasure? Dildo Baggins

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

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John Katzenbach were drinking a soda... He is the author of The Psicoanalist

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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Why did the girl fall off of the swings? Because I threw a refrigerator at her.

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Question: What do you call a Black person who cooks food at a fried chicken restaurant? Answer: A chef

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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How do you treat lice Avoid getting them

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Q : Why was the little girl crying? A : Because she tripped and hurt her knee.

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Where does Elmo live? In Sesame Street.

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knock, knock! No answer, they probably can't hear you, use the doorbell.

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Did you know that in the country of Nigeria, every minute, 60 second passes?

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Why was the 2-year-old girl found dead in the swamp? Her mom was Casey Anthony.

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What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

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What's red and a cow? Red cow

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Why didn't Jimmy go to school? Because his school was nuked.

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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