Lucas talks to mom she says hi

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What's red and hurts you? A brick.

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, building up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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How did the car get a dent? Terrorists bombed the house next to it

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A couple arrive at a Halloween party for nudists. Then they enjoy the themed decor and food.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

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Where did the little boy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Who is a pussy? Jeff Misner

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What does a witch put food in? A lunchbox

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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A blonde, a brunette and a red-head find a mirror with a message on it that says "Stand in front of the mirror and say something you think is true. If it is true, I'll grant you a wish. If it is wrong, you'll be sucked inside the mirror and be trapped there forever." The blonde, who is standing in front of the mirror, says "I think this is a stupid joke." and nothing happened.

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What's funnier than a chicken? nothing.

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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Q: what do you call this?: the boi wuz ridin the scool bus and it crased in a wal. A: grammacally flawed

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what has one ear, one leg, one eye, one arm, and is Jewish half a Jew

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A pedophile walks into a daycare

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A kid walks into the car and the dad says, "Wear your seatbelt".

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Jumping out of an airplane is a once in a lifetime expeirence.

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A preposition is a bad thing to end a sentence with.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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Hope you all drop the soap in prison

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to fix a lightbulb? Lets go ride bikes.

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why was little bobby sad? he accidentally super-glued Jupiter to his forehead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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