Life gave me onions. Onionaide Sucks

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Why did the baby crawl onto the road? because a sick bastard put a bottle of milk there knowing that a bus would be going through that route soon.

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What do Chinese kids have that African kids dont? Chinese citizenship and at least one Chinese parent.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

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*ring ring ring* hello? This is a robbery... Dum dum dum.... (hangs up) *beep beep beep*

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What do you call a black man that likes potatoes? Whatever his name is.

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Why did the black guy love his new shirt? Because it was 100% cotton

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What did the latino say when he was struck over the head with a shovel? "ouch"

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How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

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What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

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I couldn't afford haircuts so I purposely contracted cancer.

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what reason a man dont cry when the dog of his own childs dies? *guess the answer now a) he killed it b) he didnt like it c) a + b

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So last night I was f**king my girlfriend and I flip her over and f**k her up the ass. Later we're sitting having a cigarette when she says, "you know it was pretty presumptuous of you to think you can just flip me over and f**k me up the ass." And I said, "presumptuous!? That's a pretty big word for a 5th grader."

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how do you get rid of diahreah? Shove pepto bismo up your butt.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Knock, Knock Knock, Knock who? Knock, Knock

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? They are different species... do i really need to explain the difference??

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Boy: Doctor! Doctor! I can't see my legs Doctor: It's because you're blind son

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

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What's love like? Some people say it's like a lotus flower, others say it's like an orchid... Personally I'd like to say it's like a fire at the bottom of you're soul-- like when people sin and go to hell... that fire burns forever???

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A Jew doesn't walk out of the Holocaust.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whose. There? Not Susie.

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Basically copying you.

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Men's rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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