Why did the penis enter the vagina? They were trying for a baby

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Why didn't cancer cross the road? Because it was to busy taking my family.

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Old Mother Hubbard Went to the cupboard, To give the poor dog a bone: When she came there, The cupboard was bare, And so the poor dog had none. So Old Mother Hubbard was reported for animal cruelty

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Your momma is so dumb she'd starve if she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store. -Actually my mom has a pHD in Nutritional Science. If she were trapped in a fully stocked grocery store, she'd utilize that knowledge to maintain a balanced diet until a way was made available for her to return home.

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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Yo' mama's so fat she has type 2 diabetes.

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A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

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What do you call a man who has been run over by a car? An Ambulance

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Why did the little girl keep running into things Because she was blind

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Why did the catholic priest get sent to jail? Tax evasion.

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My parents died!

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What do you call kids born in whorehouses? Poor, poor children.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

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A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half of a worm in your apple. What's worse than finding half of a worm in your apple? Getting aids from that apple.

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what do you call a gay kid? KIRK, SAV, FRANK, or even KIRKLE THE TURTLE

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What do you call 10 Asians playing basketball? A group of friends hanging out and having a good time.

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what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

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your mom is so stupid that she is suffering from down's syndrome, and has a shorter life expectancy than normal people.

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What do you call an Aboriginal in a yellow sleeping bag? An organised man, ready for the harsh winter ahead.

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Q: If Hitler spots a jew, what will he do? A: You suck at history dude, Hitler is dead! Moral: What? You did not get the daily news?

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Q: What did the redneck say when he ran out of beer? A: I need more beer.

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Fire extinguishers are sexy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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