What did one manicotti say to the other manicotti? I doubt we'll ever know.

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What's cooler than ice ? Liquid oxygen.

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A woman goes into the supermarket and buys a single banana, a canned meal for one and some ice cream. While paying for her items, the cashier looks up at her and says "I can tell you're single" "Oh yeah? How'd you know?" The woman asks. "Because you're ugly as fuck." Replies the cashier.

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how do u get a clown to stop smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKY’S. PRETTY MUCH USELESS BUT MAKE YOU SMILE WHEN YOU PUSH THEM DOWN THE STAIRS. Source: http://www.pingzic.com/funny-whatsapp-status-to-make-others-laugh/

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had a gun...

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Your mom is so dumb that all of society says she was poorly educated.

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Why are you bored? because fungus grows in your eyeballs so you try to stab it out but you end up blind and dead lol

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Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

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Wade

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if your having trouble coming through the back door, try a Butterfinger

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Why didn't the man stop at the stop sign? He was violently killed turning at the last intersection

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Nobody. Go make some friends.

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If life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic

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You know what they say about big feet... Wow, those are some big feet.

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What is the hardest part of a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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What did the turtle say to the hare? Nothing. Animals can't speak.

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Why couldnt the man stop dancing? He had Parkinson's.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Q. What is worse than a worm in your apple? A. Hitler

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knock knock Who's there? Will Nealis Will Nealis who? Will nealis continuously finds himself crying himself to sleep as reality begins to smack himn in the face revealing to him that nobody has, does, or ever will like him. He is also informed that the reason his parents left him is because he is such a flaming ginger, his nasty face ruins the atmosphere of any room he walks in to. he has been adopted by a lovely gay couple and he takes after both of his fathers very much, in the aspect of enjoying massive animal c o c k in his mouth as well as having threesomes with his dads. will goes to school everyday and is tormented for being homosexual, so when he goes home hie parents beat him....off and have lemon partys with wills grandpa as he watches and masturbates vigourously.

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What's brown and sticky? a stick.

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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