Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What do you get when you cross a monkey and a fish? An unlikely premise upon which to base a joke

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Man is even more eager to copulate than a donkey – his purse is what restrains him

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What happens when a super saiyan eats a fully grown pineapple? hehe xd

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How many inches of snow are there when the fireplace burns for 10 minutes? Red chickens

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What's the difference between an airplane and a cantaloupe? What? Wow your a dumby head.

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KILL WHITEY

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What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

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It is cruel to want a "sky full of lighters" as, according to the Laws of Gravity, the lighters will eventually come back down to earth and incinerate everything below them.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. I don't know, I've had a bad day, I can't think straight. Why do you keep asking me these questions? Always talking at me, everyday it's the same - why can't you just shut up?! I would be better off dead, then it would stop, this suffocating blackness. I need to escape...I'm going to do it tonight...pills, something like that...I don't care any longer. Goodbye.

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How many Germans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 5.

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A black man walks into a Subway restaurant, and goes up to the counter. The cashier already knows that he's going to order the chicken, but how does he know? Because the black man is a regular, and orders the same thing every time.

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When Life gives you lemons... Squeeze the juice right back into Life's eyes!

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Roses are red violets are blue next thing you know my D*** is in you

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what's white and goes up? a retarded snowflake

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What does the kid with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A: arms and legs

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I find Holocaust jokes hilarious, Anne Frankly I know a few...

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What's funnier than cancer? Just about anything. There's nothing funny about terminal illnesses.

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Yo momma so fat, when she turns around, people give her a welcome back party!

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If Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and Charlie Sheen were in a room together and you had a gun with two bullets, who would you shoot? Well Hitler and Bin Laden are already dead, and Charlie probably wouldn't die. Plus, I honestly don't think I could bring myself to shoot someone.

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Why are you asleep? Because I'm tired.

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Yo momma is so fat that she is in the guinness records

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Question to make it sound like a racist joke? Politically correct answer that should not offend anyone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops