What is red and itchy? Something that itches and it turns red if you itch it to much

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Q: So what's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? A: The punchline of this joke,

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Someone stopped playing Skyrim.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's the difference between a soldier and a black man? A black man lives a normal life, probably working a full time job to bring income to his family. A soldier has seen his friends killed right before his very eyes, has probably killed, and most likely has night terrors accompanied by the sounds of gunshots and grenades. He will suffer trauma up until he dies of a heart attack in his mid 80's after experiencing a terrifying flashback of life in the war.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

When Chuck Norris runs, he doesn't even move a muscle.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did the Asian ace the test? Because she had worked very diligently, taken copious notses, and studied fervently until she had a thorough mastery of the topic.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why didn't santa deliver any presents this christmas? Because he isn't real

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many Jews can you fit in the car? 4 in the seats and 6 million in the ashtray.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why did jimmy's mom fall off the cliff? i dont know.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Want to hear an orphan joke? Knock Knock Who's there? Not the parents

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a boy with one eye and no arms. -Mean names.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the black guy cross the road? i have no idea but i hope he got to the other side safely.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Those who can't teach... Aren't teachers.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call a black airline pilot? Captain, you big racist.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What Did The Kid With No Arms And No Legs Get For His Birthday? A Walking Stick

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why doesn't Lebron James have any rings? Cuz he didn't win a championship.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is the square root of 69? 8.306623863

thumb_up thumb_down -9

your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Knock, Knock Who's there? Joseph. Joseph who? Joseph Brown. Oh, hello Joseph! Why don't you come in? No thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

So 2 guys are curious if there is baseball I heaven... So they say when either of them dies they have to come back as a spirit and tell the other man if there is baseball in heaven One of the guys dies and comes back as a spirit... He comes to the other man and says... I've got some good news and some bad news The man says what's the the good news? The spirit says the good news is there is baseball in heaven So the man says what's the bad news?? The spirit says... Your pitching Tuesday night!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How did bob survive the explosion? He wasn't at the explosion.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the 16 yearold pregnant girl cross the road? To get to the abortion center

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops