What did the Black man say when he just got home from work? "Hi honey, I just got home from work."

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Q. What did the monkey say to his little brother? A. Nothing. Monkeys are physically incapable of speaking, therefore it is impossible for them to communicate using the human language.

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A man walked into a pub, and enjoys of a couple off pints. Some time later he loudly asks the gentleman next to him: Do you know about this thing called Fightclub?... The bartender had to call an ambulance, you don't talk about fightclub

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How do you make a baby float? Two scopes of Ice cream and two scopes of baby.....and the holocaust.

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I saw a stray dog the other day So I petted it and got on my way.

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What's grey and can't swim? A castle.

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Where can you find a Muslim with a boxcutter? At a UPS.

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What do you call a man whos had his arms ripped off in front of you? An ambulance, because with an injury such as this, you can die anywhere between 10 and 45 minutes

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What did the Johhny say to the black man when he saw him buying a watermelon? Nothing, Johnny is mute.

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A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

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Q: What do you say to someone who makes fun of you and is bigger than you? A: Nothing, you just punch him in the toe and run away

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Excuse me, I have a shitload of stuff to do, so you are Eliza huh? I thought that was just one person conveying something to someone. Anyway, what is your name? My name is actually Nero, but you do not strike me as an Eliza, first name is more than enough. You know, if you dare, Ill be back shortly, I was gonna shower but then again, I haven't moved at all today, so yeah. Saved you? I have never saved anyone well, excuse me then, see you around, worry less about people bothering with us chatting, hell they might risk learning something (not a chance, people here are fucking jackasses, with one exception, and I do not mean me this time).

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. Due to the height of the fall, one of his ribs pierced his heart and he also suffered extensive head trauma and internal bleeding due to the force when he hit the floor, where he lay in agony for several hours before dying a slow, painful death.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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What did the grizzly bears have for lunch? Fish and tourists.

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what did the pizza say to the bread? nothing pizza cant talk

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What is the difference between being a serial killer and a doctor? I'm not a doctor.

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Did you know that you can drink lava? You can only do it once though.

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What did the tractor say when he lost his farmer? Where's my farmer??????

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yo mamas so ugly she makes blind children cry

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this is not a joke

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If you like this, it will have one extra like

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Knock knock Who's there? Bill Oh hai come in

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What happened to the guy who got bullied? He commited suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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