What's the difference between a smashed watermelon and a dead black person? One is a minor slip of the hands and the other is a fatal accident involving a human being.

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Picture This, you are going down the freeway in a yellow four-door banana, going 75 mph and all 4 tires blow out, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? Theres no bones in ice cream.

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What did the sting ray say to steve irwin? It doesn't matter , steve irwin is dead, dead as a doormat.

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What is the opposite of Christopher Walkins? Christopher Reeves

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im gay

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There once was the worlds most important people on an airplane. All of them. They were a Boy Scout with a hiking pack, World's Oldest person, World's Smartest person, a Scientist who had the cure to cancer, and the World's Richest man. The Pilot told them that the plane was running out of gas and they would have to bail. But there was a problem, two people were going to have to die. They were only two parachutes short. So the Scientist grabbed one and said, "I'm the only one with the cure to cancer I've got lives to save." And he bails. Then the World's oldest person jumps out with a parachute saying, "I Still Have A Life To Live!!!" Then the Richest person realizes there is two parachutes left. He says, "I have the most money so I have to go because I could save America from going bankrupt." Grabs a chute and jumps. Then, the world's smartest person just happens to be so selfish and bails with the last Parachute. So the Pilot and and the Boy Scout were left. The pilot was kind enough to let the Kid go because he still had he longest life to live. But the kid said no, we could both go. The pilot said no you go. The kid was still being stubborn. And said No, we could both go, The world's smartest person took my back pack, there is one chute left, we could share it. And so they both jumped and landed safely on the ground. And that was the end of the World's smartest man.

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What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

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Roses are red Zombies are hungry and blue My brain is half-eaten And what about you?

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Why did the blond woman sell her water skis? She was in a horrible accident and will never walk again.

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A woman comes at the doctor.

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What do u call a boomerang that doesnt come back A stick

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What's big, hairy and smells like sweat? The big show after a hard days work in the ring.

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What is the difference between Switzerland and Sudan? One is in Europe the other is in Africa

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex.

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joe diragi makes paul look straight

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Row row row your boat Right to KFC Put some kool-aid in your cup And toast to you and me

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What is worse than finding a worm in ur apple Idk I am asking u

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What do you call a police officer who kills a black person? Innocent

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"Doctor do i have aids?" asked the worried 13-year old.

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What do you call a fat ethiopian. Impossible

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Why did they save the man in a burning building? To arrest him for arson.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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I stabbed a person. No seriously, I just stabbed them. There's no punchline. Just Just Stab wounds.

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what happend when a blind guy tried to save a guy from a fire big mistake they both died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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