What is the best time to go to the dentist? During office hours 2 or 3 times a year to ensure optimal dental health and hygiene .

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Knock knock Who's there? Bill Oh hai come in

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you get a Black Person out of a tree? Well, if he is stuck call 911 itmediatly!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant scorpion.

thumb_up thumb_down +6,091

your dad called night and told me your grandpa died.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why can't Amy winehouse drive? She's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are yellow Grass is green

thumb_up thumb_down -19

-How do you befriend Tom Hanks? -Kidnap his son

thumb_up thumb_down +67

Your mom is so ugly, that her job prospects are affected negatively, and your family suffers as a consequence.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the man shoot up the movie theater? Because he spent his whole child hood playing Call of Duty Black Ops II, Left 4 Dead 2, and Minesweeper. And video games, are the only thing that would rive someone to shoot up a movie theater.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

So a jew walks into a bar!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What are astronauts called in Soviet Russia? Cosmonauts

thumb_up thumb_down +18

1: Knock. Knock. 2: Don't come in I'm naked.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the little girl cry in school? Because she remembered her parents were both in prison. She is in a state run foster academy.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: what is long hard and full of seamen A: a submarine

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why did a latino decide to eat green apple? i don't know that's what i'm asking

thumb_up thumb_down +50

A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

thumb_up thumb_down -30

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "Yeah, but you make a really great sandwich!"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops