Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he already ate his dog.

A Christian, a Sunni Muslim, and a Shi'a Muslim walked into a government building. Turns out, they were Lebanese, so this was a normal occurrence. Thus, to draw any humor from it before first taking into account the weaknesses of your own government would be both unwise and unfair.

Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

why did the chicken cross the road

Why was the black man escorted out of the bar? Civil rights is still a real issue in this country and must be solved.

Why did the black guy eat KFC? Cause he was hungry.

Q: Why cant Helen Keller drive? A: Because shes dead.

What did the Muslim do after his friend told him a funny joke ? Laugh.

What do you call a blond in a library? A girl that likes to read.

how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

How do you get a Jewish man out of a pool? Ask him politely, for I'm sure he's a pleasant and reasonable fellow.

You know what's really long? The bread lines in Africa

What happens when you cross a Labrador and a Poodle. A species of dog that has been cross bred.

What is black and white and red all over? A half eaten zebra carcass.

hi

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

What do you get when you mix a crap with a fart and a slug? Urmom

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

A blind man walks in a bar I mean like a metal bar But it didn't hurt He only laught

Why can't vegetarians eat mushrooms because I can't urinate over a scotch bonnet :/

A man and a woman are happily married. The die

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...