What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he died.

what is the difference between a white woman and a black woman.. i raped the black one

a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

why do i love my iphone because its a very versatile electronic device with many uses and i can get the anti-joke app

What has equally bad consequences as breaking someone's leg in front of the local authorities? Breaking your own leg on purpose in front of the local authorities.

Q: What dosent a Jew and a pizza have in commen? A: The pizza dosent scream when you put it in the oven.

One day I was walking in the forest when I saw a squirrel get hit by a van. It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

What happens when Batman Robin and Wonder woman go on a date? Somebody isn't getting laid.

When life gives you: High Fructose Corn Syrup,Citric Acid, Ascorbic Acid,Maltodextrin, Sodium Acid Phosphate, Magnesium Oxide, Calcium Fumarate, Yellow 5, Tocopherol, and less than 2% natural flavours... Make lemonade.

Q: why couldn't anyone hear hellen keller when she fell off a cliff? A: she was mute.

How do u know when someone is horny? look at there pants

Knock knock. Who's there? Ahmadinejad. Well then get the **** away from my door!

Do you know why I'm bored???? No why are you bored Because I am

My friends told me they found a dead women....they said they pissed on her........that was my mom

What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

Jack and Jill ran up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and died.

Where is the best place to hold a bridal shower? The Kitchen

why did the man walk into the metal pole? because hes blind and suffers from cancer.

Where did Lucy go after being hit by a train? Well, the results of this question are somewhat difficult to pinpoint, but here is a generalized ratio model. 47% of Lucy went underneath the trains wheels and was left behind, crushed into the railway sleepers. 33% was thrown aside and discarded around the SIDES of the track. 19% was carried on the front of the train, into the next station where it fell off as soon as the train stopped. 1% was found in Mount Everest.

What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? The black man has a family of four and is working 12 hours a day at a minimum wage job to afford the high rent, the utility bills, and to buy the pizza to feed his family.

Man: Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains........ Doctor: You clearly have Alarming mental issues perhaps a psychologist would be the right person to discuss this matter further

Shit Happens....or sometimes it doesn't! As the person is taken to the hospital with severe constipation.

A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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