Michael J Fox may not be able to draw a perfect circle but he sure can jerk off like a champ

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Knock knock Whos there A dead boy a dead boy who A dead boy who started tobuy drugs and didn't have the money for it and his family loved him and he was going to go to college

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roses are red violets are blue i'll be back in an hour or two

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's blind. Also, she's been dead for 43 years.

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what rhymes with pirates? not Somalia because i don't consider a inflatable boat a pirate ship.

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What do you call a white man in the middle of Mexico City? Dave.

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What do you get if you cross an angle with an antelope? An anglelope.

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Knock knock --Come in.

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If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

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Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia, and don't have any friends

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Why did the man cross the road? His mother had recently passed away after a 12 year battle with lung cancer and is visiting her tombstone.

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An owl and a squirrel watch a farmer walk by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing because owls are not capable of human speech. The owl then eats the squirrel because the owl is a bird of prey.

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

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Why did Bruno Mars explode? He caught a grenade for ya.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot's house... Knock knock Who's there? The Chincken

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Why does the sultan of Turkey wear red suspenders? So that his pants wouldn't fall down.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. That is highly improbable, due to the fact he is in a wheelchair.

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What's sad about four black people going over in a cliff in Cadillac? It was my Cadillac.

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Contrary to popular statement, "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade," you technically can't do this because of the need for water and sugar to make lemonade. Secondly, life can't technically hand you lemons because life isn't a physical thing that can hand you lemons. So really, you don't even have to worry about the second two ingredients.

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What do you call an asian man driving a plane? Well you can't drive planes

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What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They're both Tom Cruise.

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Where's my tractor?

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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