How did the girl cross the road? --she didn't, she died trying because she was blind and didn't see the sign that said "Don't Walk"

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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REHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHABREHAB

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What do you get when you mix Lil Wayne and Lil John? A full size John Wayne

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am Jack Bauer, Where is the nuke?

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A man cheats on his wife and ruins his marriage of 24 years.

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Why was the black man chasing the little girl? The black man was the adoptive parent of the little girl and they were playing tag.

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Why didn't the politically-correct lawyer laugh at his black neighbour's jokes? He had an incapacitating malady of oralfacialoaralysis rendering him unable to laugh or smile

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Why did octopus cross the road? Because the road was underwater

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One girl said to her friends, "LOL guys wait for me." She ran to a pile of corpses. The girl was about to lose her sanity as she was in denial when her friends had died. She held hands of two of the corpses and smiled and pretended everything was ok.

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Yo momma is so fat I really feel sorry for her.

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Q: Why did little Johnny not like little Suzie? A: He was a homosexual.

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hi

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Man frantically runs into a bar, he suffers brain damage and cannot remember anything about his life. Though he tries to make everything go back to the way it once was, he and his wife grow distant and their family falls apart.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

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Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

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What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

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a jewish man with a boner walks into a wall what does he hit first his cheek due to the fact he was looking at an attractive woman

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Why did the girl scream? She was being raped.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller read? Tree sap.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

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What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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