A dyslexic agnostic insomniac stays up at night wondering if there's a dog.

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"Hey hey hey, did you hear the joke about the guy with terminal cancer?" "No." "Sorry to break it to you then."

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One time at band camp.............tha'ts it........

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Roses are red Roses are also white and Violets are Violet not blue. Also I'm a realist and your grandmother is going to die soon

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dog

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Why did the boy get teased? Because his name was spelt wrong (k)urtis

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why so serious? because your too serious.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing ? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Well it cant be sarah

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A drunk man into a bar. He is ripping apart a family

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What do a duck and a tricycle have in common? They both have wheels. Except for the duck.

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a young boy with no arms or legs log rolls himself outside where he gets struck by lightning

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My new friend, aka future fuckbuddy asked me what I do for a living. I told her, I write books. She asked me if I had gotten anything published yet. I told her: EXCUSE ME? DID I SAY I WAS A PUBLISHER? She laughed, for some reason... Good enough of an Antichri... Antijoke.

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An Irishman walked into a bar, except he would call it a pub, because there are slight differences in vocabulary in different regions, 37 minutes later he walked home safely, fed his cat, read some pages of a book he had been reading, turned the light off and went to bed.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms; *knock knock*, Who's There? Not Sally.

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Is your refridgerator running? because if its not, you should probably have it looked at by a repair man,

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The Pope walks into a bar. The bartender says, "what'll ya have, Pope?" But the Pope's grasp of English is tenuous at best, so he mumbles something in Latin. The bartender doesn't know any Latin. The Pope gets frustrated and leaves.

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Why did the hamster run around the wheel.? Because he lived in a small cage and had nothing better to do.

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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How do you know when Taylor Swift is dead? When you don't hear Boyfriend songs anymore

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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What's the difference between a whale and an elephant

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i'm hard

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Q: Do you know what you can make when you have enough cents? A: Dollars

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a guy walks down a street when he sees a bomb he walks away

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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