What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your carmel apple, which costs about 35 cents more on average.

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A man walks into a casino, and when he walks out his family has no home.

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Have you ever treat woman like sandwich? Elephant and walrus said Jews are troubles. If six plus nine is five, chickens will eat you, saturdays.

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roses are red, violets are blue. Barack Obama says, nice to meet you.

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how do you make a cripple depressed? stairs..

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JUST KIDDING^

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Q: Why is Rosie odonell fat? A: Because you are sexual attracted to small children.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

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Why did the man go bra shopping? Cause he is a single father and his teenage daughter needs a new one.

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I am not Moral Man. Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUU

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What's do a woman's vagina and a camel's toe have in common? Other than being parts of two mammals, they have nothing in common.

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What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

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Why did the Asian man open up a Sushi restaurant? Because he had a fetish for cumming in sushi and giving it to strangers.

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why does a man walks into a bar? it was a metal bar so he probably was retarted

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Nah, could not care less about how I sound on "The network", its just that I spent all night finishing the core concept to my new novel, and all the capital letters and stuff sound like Jim Carrey in my head as I type. So Redcunt, where you going? When you coming back?

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead.

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What do you call a guitar with only one string? A guitar.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? The IRS.

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How do you get an elephant into a fridge? You can't - elephants are too big to fit in fridges. How do you get a giraffe into a fridge? You can't, see above. If there is a raging fire in the jungle, which animal will survive? Most likely the parrots and other birds, as they can fly away.

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Your mama's so stupid, she gave birth to YOU.

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A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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Why don't lesbians use dildoes? Because they look just like a big penises.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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