What is white, wet, sticky, and gets squished out? Glue obviously, wait.... What were you thinking of?

An Aussie, a Mexican and an Asian walk into a bra. You read that wrong.

knock knock whose there open the door open the door who just open the door so i can come inside

How do you get a hot blonde to do your laundry? At knife point.

roses are black violets are black i am blind

my uncle tommy is super religious. last month he's walking down the street, he gets mugged and shot in the chest. now miraculously (and i mean miraculously), he always keeps a bible in his left chest pocket. and he had something to read as he bled to death.

A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

Why do people make antijokes? Because they can

Why did the owl visit the hospital? His mom was dying of luekemia.

BILLY BOB JAM:KNOCK KNOCK!! BOBERT:WHAT!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WOULD I EVEN CARE?!! BILLY BOB JAM:PIE BOBERT:WHY WONT YOU SHUT UP BILLY BOB JAM ORLANDIO STEAK?!!?!?!GET ME OUTTA HERE AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

bunnies are fluffy just like yo mama

Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

So, a black guy walked into a bar. "Ouch," he said.

Why did spongebob eat Patrick Because he was hungry

How are a dead chicken and a woman alike? They both belong in the kitchen

A blond, a brunette and a redhead are all trapped on a desert island. They work together and manage to survive until help arrives.

Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

A man comes to a fork in the road. He then looks around then proceeds to pick it up, puts it in his pocket, then continues walking down the road as if nothing had happened.

What's the difference between George Washington and Wiz Khalifa? George Washington died many years ago.

What do you call a man with short legs? Whatever his name is

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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