If it looks like chicken and tastes like chicken but Chuck Norris says it's beef, politely correct him. He is actually a very sensible fellow and will probably thank you for doing so.

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Why did the man die in a car crash? Answer: He was not fallowing the traffic laws and therefore risking the life of himself and others. This may have resulted from the possibility that he was under the influence of alcohol, he was under the influence of drugs, he was emotionally unstable from a bread up, he was emotionally unstable from because of an abusive family, he was emotionally unstable from losing his job, he had an abusive childhood, he was emotionally impaired, he was high from lack of oxygen, he wanted to wear a blindfold, he didn't like his car, liked to spin the steering wheel a lot, he thought the gas was the break, or he just didn't like traffic laws.

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Once a man asked a lady working at the supermarket, Can I see your avocados? She kindly walked him over to the rack where they were being held.

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why couldnt the baby walk through the door? because it had a javeline through its head.

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A prostitute has sex with a man. She gave him herpes.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Who the hell are you?

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why did the alien eat the cow? peer pressure

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Whats worse than getting knocked up? Finding out your Mother is a drugy living on the side of the road and your Dad is an acholic who diesnt care about you and realizes you might turn out the same way.

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A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar and have a friendly argument over their religious beliefs.

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Q. Why did the teacher trip and fall? A. Because his left foot was gnawed off by a camel, and he often finds it difficult to walk.

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Why was six afraid of seven? It wasn't. Numbers are not sentient and thus incapable of feeling fear.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van.

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Why couldnt the man stop the car rolling down the hill? Because he had no legs.

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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i hate when mothers said " clean your room" me " why " mom " because we have guest coming " me " oh i am sorry i didn't know we are all gathering in my f**king room

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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3 men check in to a motel. They all decide to leave given the eminent danger of being the butt of a homosexual joke.

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer .

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Why did the clown fall out of the helicopter?? Gravity

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poop is very very yummy.

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Roses are black Violets are black Im Helen Keller WWWHHAATTTTT!?!?

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how do you kill a blond? give her a gun and tell her it a blow dryer

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why do chairs recline Because they were built that way!!!!

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People shouldnt make fun of holocaust jokes..my grandpa died cause of it! he fell off the gaurd tower

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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