why did the the chicken cross the road? because some sad,board people wanted to make a joke

there's 4 men, a rabbi, a priest, a monk, and a captain. they all go on the captain's ship for a cruise with a couple hundred people. this was during the cold war, and the ship was mistaken for a war ship, and the russians missled it. the monk says: "we have to get everyone off the ship!" the rabbit say: "NO! the women and children need to get off first! And we should also hail to Satan!" the Captain says: "OMG! It's a talking Rabbit!" the priest then stops the rabbit to death!" the rabbi says: "The rabbit is right! But just the children!" The Captain says: "Screw the children! this ship is going to Hell, we have talking animals saying we should worship the devil!" the priest says: "Do you think we have time" the monk, the rabbi, and the captain stare and beat him to death.... "Well, he was already going to Hell" the Monk says. But during this entire time the ship has been sinking and another missle blows up the ship. Everyone dies, except for Sean Conery...and Chuck Norris.

Why was six afraid of seven. It wasnt because numbers cant possible show emotions. I

Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

Whats funnier than 2 dead babies? Seinfeld, and I hate Seinfeld.

If she is under the age of 18 years old and is identified by your state as a minor, shes too young for you bro.

Why did the baboon fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? A disgusting halfbreed which prays daily for its own euthenasia...

Why do women have boobs? So they can feed their newborn children without paying for expensive formula

God said "let there be light" Chuck Noris said "say please

What happened the the blonde that went swimming? She cooled off and enjoyed a hot summer day.

Jews

Why couldn't the emo kid finish reading his book? Because he was on the titanic when it sank.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

Two horses were in a field. One said "this is a good place to hide". The other said, "well, let's hope they don't Findus here!"

I tell the Doctor I'm having pains in my chest. He says that sounds serious and admits me immediately to the hospital.

i put the STD in S.T.u.D all i need is U!!! F_CK all i need is U!!!!!!! o.0 lolzzz

When you give your homecoming date flowers, you're really handing them a bouquet of sex organs

roses are red violets are blue my poems mite be ugly and so are u

Grammer is very important

What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo

Ask me If I'am a tree are u a tree? no.....

What happened to the man who lost his left arm, left leg and eye in an accident? I expect he claimed insurance, assuming he was prudent enough to insure himself, or his workplace complied with legislation.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? It's illegal to eat the Jew.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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