Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

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Your mother is so fat that when she jumps into a pool, she displaces a proportionately larger amount of water than people with normal body mass indexes or BMI

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Why did the lebanese man kill his own family? He had cancer.

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Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

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What do you call an African man with no legs? Murderer

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What do you get a man that has evreything? Aids

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Why did the leaf fall of the tree? Because it was fall

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Q: How did Helen Keller cross the street? A: She walked.

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Yo mama is so hairy she should probably start shaving.

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

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A Chinese man, an Italian man and a French man are sitting in a plane. They arrive in Los Angeles with a 23 minute delay due to atmospheric conditions

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Milkman. Milkman who? I've been coming here for 14 years and you don't even know my name? I helped take your mother to the hospital for crying out loud! I held you in my arms as a baby! And you don't even have the decency to remember MY NAME?! I'm sorry I don't live in a house that allows milk and other groceries to be delivered, I'm sorry that I wasn't born into a nice family with a nice home! I'm sorry that I have had to come here EVERY WEEK FOR FOURTEEN YEARS and you can't even remember my NAME! My name! I left my family for christmas one year to go pick up that elmo doll for you when you were a kid! I saved you from that burning treehouse! I helped you with you're 3rd grade science fair project and you won! YOU WON! We took a picture together that i have kept in my wallet. And i proudly say here's me and timmy. ME AND TIMMY! TIMMY! But no...you don't need to know my name. Well good day sir. You shan't see me again.

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Knock, Knock. Who's There? Its Greg. I forgot my keys, can you let me back in?

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What do you say to a man who just gave you a million dollars. thank you

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What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

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Why did Jack take a prune out for the evening? A healthy snack as part of a balanced diet.

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69.

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There were three brothers. Big, Harry and Dick. They were walking along the road and were all instantly killed by a drunk driver. Their names were never mentioned and their story was used as a promotion for the seriousness of drunk driving and should not be taken lightly.

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Your mothers so dumb that when she had to take a math test, she received a significantly lower grade than the rest of her classmates.

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:3

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why is stu taking so long to post a joke because he is autistic

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What did the man do when he went in the bathroom he took a crap wiped his butt and washed his hands and went back to meet his family at the dinner table

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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