On a scale of one to 10, F*ck yourself.

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What Do You Call A Fake Noodle? ----An Impastaaa!!!!!

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Why did the car stop? It ran out of gas.

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Yo mamas so fat We are all concerned for her health

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why did the platypus fall out of a tree it couldnt even climb up the tree

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Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

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An apple a day keeps a check next to the "I ate an apple today" box on my "what I did today" daily checklist.

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What do you call a lazy good-for-nothing who can't succed at anything, steals your money, and who is unskilled in every way? A women

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What did the deaf Jewish Rabbi say to the Italian Priest. What?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Who gives a shit

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick!

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What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

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A kid walks into a ctholic school and asks about the therory of evolution.

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Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

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Why was the hiker upset? He was plummeting 1,500 feet to the ground after tripping on a rock too close to a cliff.

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Your mom is so...wonderful.

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Two blonds are driving to Disneyland. While there driving they see a sign "Disneyland: left" So they started crying and headed back home.

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How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

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What did the elephant say to the whale? Nothing, neither can talk and they live in very different biomes.

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Knock Knock Who's there Nobody is here. This is just a feeble attempt of your subconsious to convince yourself you have someone who cares about you in the least bit to mask the horrible wretched pain of loneliness and suffering that is the enternal damnation of your life.

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The police, we have several warrants for your arrest.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh

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Why do so many people troll on the internet? Because Hitler was awesome!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops