What the kid with no arms get for christmas? A baseball and a glove to go through with his dad

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call it, he isn't coming. Posted By: Lram

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How do you confuse a blond? Begin talking to her about a subject that's not in her field of expertise using complicated technical verbiage and jargon.

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What's the difference between a hippopotamus? An orangutan.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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why couldnt hellen keller drive? cuz she was blind

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What's worst than the Holocaust? No Wi-Fi

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Why couldn't the morbidly obese lady order a cheeseburger? A: Because it wasn't on the menu

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A man is talking nonsense at a wall when another man walks up to him. "Why are you talking at a wall?" "I'm trying to appease the mighty wall god Kaleothayrhonka." "Cool, let me join you!" And they both talk at the wall for hours on end because they are stupid that way.

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How do you make a girl happy then sad within 5 seconds? Buy her a pony and then shoot it

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What's black and makes me food? A microwave.

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how long does it take for a black woman to poop? women dont poop, especially not halle berry

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Where's my tractor?

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Why did Ralph fall off the swing He was distracted because he had a perfect view of the twin towers when 9-11 was happening

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Their, they're, there You're, your

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There is an Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman and they are climbing up a mountain, when they reach the top and decide to climb down again.

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What do you get when you cross an African-American, a bird, and ice cream? I don't know.

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What did the priest say to the nun? ... I don't know, I wasn't there.

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo Boo hoo? Boo hoo your parents are dead.

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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A black guy, a Mexican guy and a Jew walk into a hospital. They are all undergoing the same chemotherapy treatment.

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You have three biscuits. Your friend eats two. How many biscuits do you have? A: 3 Your friend is bulemic so he throws them both up, so you still have them.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Because I'm colorblind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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