What's green and has wheels? Grass, I was lying about the wheels.

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roses are red violets are blue they are pretty and you are not

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what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies? girl scouts

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What's worse than shoveling dead babies??? Using a pitchfork...

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Guy 1:Whats the difference between a towel and toilet paper? Guy2: I dont know Guy : SO IT WAS YOU!

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A man walks into a bar. He has a serious drinking problem and is destroying his life.

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Fine, this better be worth it, this is no time to be a jackass Nero.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He decided to sail to Portland. He cast off and was never seen again.

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What did the muslim get for christmas? Nothing.

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Why was the teenage girl pregnant? She got raped by her dad.

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What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

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Q:Whats worse, being chased by a chainsaw or being dunked on by LeBron James? A:Since a chainsaw has one of the sharpest metal blades know to mankind, it would be the chainsaw. Although this reguires effort, it is a known fact that Lebron James has been dunked on by some kid at Xaiver, so I would think the chainsaw would hurt more.

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So Jimmy's phsycology teacher is trying to think of beginnig lessons for her phsycology class. so she gets up and says "class, i want u anyone who thinks they are stupid to stand up." nobody stood up. then Jimmy stands up. The teacher says "Jimmy, u think u are stupid?" Jimmy replies "No, i just felt bad with u standing up all alone."

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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How did the dog die? He was put down.

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Ferrari ? I don't have 10 dead babies in my garage.

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What do you call a duck In Africa ? Screwed

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A clown a hockey player and a...........what the heck that's all I got.

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What did Batman say to When they were heading to the Batmobile Robin get in the batmobile.

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Phew, I was like thinking all like "I am really into this guy, we can like chat like this and stuff too right?"

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how do you upset a black guy kill his family :)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno, that's why I asked you.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because no cars were coming.

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Son : daddy ,I got punished in school today. Dad :why? Son: My teacher pointed the scale towards me saying -"At the end of this scale there is an idiot"..... I just asked "WHICH END ?.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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