Why did the chicken cross the road? He is suicidal and should probably get help.

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Who lived in a pineapple under the sea?

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Q. What did Nelson say to his men before they boarded ship? A. "Board ship men"

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whats funny about female tennage life? SELF HARM OOOOO YEAHHHH

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How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree? Get a ladder and help her down.

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One day a young gentleman was walking down the street. He sees a wounded dog laying there on the sidewalk. He goes to tend to the wounded animal. It bites his hand. He rushes to the hospital and tests positive for rabies. The man has to be vaccinated and the dog terminated.

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A coach walks into the team dressing room at halftime; his team is down 42-0. He screams at the players, "You guys are playing like a bunch of grannies. No offense"

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why am i so pretty? because god blessed me with good looks

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Q: what did humoure say to lie A: u must be tellin a lie

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What did Helen Keller say to the little boy with cancer? Hudd Wahher shelper, ghh o.

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Joker: Why so serious Man: My mom and dad just got hit by a car, and you just stabbed my friend in the face with a pencil. Joker: Oh well im sorry to hear that.

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What happens after Madeline McCann disappears. Jokes.

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How did the semen cross the road I put on the wrong sock this morning

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How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

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Why doesn't the black man have a job? He's working on his masters degree.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. Seeing a black pilot is not alarming. If their middle-eastern, however, you have more of a problem.

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A Mexican, a Chinese man, and a cowboy are on a plane. The plane is crashing, and they need to get rid of anything to make the plane lighter so thet can glide to safety. The cowboy throws out all of his boots and says we have to many of these. Then the Mexican throws out all of his taco shells and says we have to many of these. Then the Chinese man throws out the Mexican and says we have to many of these.(:

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Why is six afraid of seven? Seven has an extra penis.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? He needed money to feed his family and to pay for his daughter's college education.

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A man invites his Irish friend to his house. "Would you like something to drink?" the man asks. "Just kidding, we don't have any drinks." Later, they die of dehydration.

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Do you know why i dont write poems Because i thought that violets were violets OTARTS...WAS...HERE

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What do you call it when you almost win? You lose.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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