What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand? What you probably have is a lawyer on holiday with his children, allowing himself or herself to be buried in order to please said children.

what's retarded and has red hair? You. ;)

Life is like swimming. When you drown you die.

FUCK YOU SAY FUCK YOU SAY SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH THATS WHAT I FUCKING SAID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A boy and a girl are playing catch. Why did the girl drop the ball? She had no arms. So why did the boy throw her the ball if she had no arms? Cause he's a Dipshit

ill have a no.9 a n.9 large

what looks like a bug, lives in larch mount and lives in a mansion? Aodhan Hearty, lied about the mansion... he lives in a web with his buggy family

Boy: Doctor! Doctor! I can't see my legs Doctor: It's because you're blind son

A blind man walks into a bar and a table and a lady....

A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a light bulb? Only one and it is politically incorrect to assume otherwise.

Q: What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? A: They both have handlebars except for the duck!

Why did the bird fall out of the sky, It hit one of the random green pipes.

A Catholic Priest, an Anglican Priest, and a Rabbi were in a train carriage together because they got a package deal to go to a conference on religious tolerance. Good for them.

What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

Why do black people like chicken? It's usually fried.

You're Mother's so fat, she sat on a chair, and it broke.

Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

What do you call an elephant mixed with a rhino? A freak.

A baby crawls into an abortion clinic.

What do Sandusky and micheal Jackson have in common? They are both white.

if you give somebody a dollar and they give you a different dollar you both have a dollar

Why did osama bin laden cross the road? To commit suicide

What does "Ford" stand for? Nothing. It's the name of the company founder, not an acronym.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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