I walked up to my friend who's a drug addict holding a can of coke. I then told said friend that I liked the smell of coke. My friend then went on to snort 27 Kilos of cocaine.

What do you do when a elephant is sitting on your fence? You hit it with a fridge

Why did the dog cross the road? He saw a fish.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

HOW LONG is a Chinese name?

What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

How do you get a Mexicans attention? By calling him by his name.

How do you teach an asian baby to read? Enroll him in a good pre-school and practice regularly.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It got shot. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

How do you make a mimer to speak? Shot him in both knees and cut of he's ear

What do you call a pregnant girl? Your Ex

knock knock whos there? your mom really? well whats she wearing a refridgerator.

What did the boy with no srms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer

You just wasted time of your life reading this, and perhaps even more wasted time thumbing this down.

Why did the swing fall off the girl? I have dyslexia

Two arabs fly into a bar.

Doctor, I keep imagining Doctors. *hayball rolls*

Where does Elmo live? In Sesame Street.

When Rocky teased Johnny by saying : 'Your momma is so fat , she looks like a hippo.' , He did not know Johnny's mother was suffering a terminal glandular problem combined with an agressive cancer..

Instructions to make origami. 1.) Staple bagels to face 2.) Ask someone else to do it. 3.) Hang yourself because you are too stupid to figure it out yourself

You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

Guess what? AIDS!

Why dont jews eat pork? Because the torah doesnt allow cannibalism

Well, I have to go eat again "Axel Knight". See you around soon enough, just give me a call if you want me around... Hopefully I find a fucking telescope so I can read the code on the chip thingie... Damn I am hungry. See you around sugartits.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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