A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It didn't, a cookie is a food, therefore it doesn't have working organs.

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What do u say to a blond when she says what a name. i love u baby i hate u baby.

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Q:What did the robot say to the boy? A:Nothing the robot malfunctioned and started choking the boy, despite the towns best efforts they could not release the death grip on the boys throat, after the robot was done choking the boy it exploded killing 99% of the population in a 5 mile radius.

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What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What happened to the baby in the microwave. I don't know I was too busy masturbating off to it in my clown suit

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Obamacare!

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dad was a serious alcoholic who refused to go to rehab. Being an alcoholic constantly led to him beating the boy and his mother. Eventually, the boy couldn't handle this anymore, and he committed suicide. Realizing what he had done, the father also committed suicide. The mother is now locked away in a mental hospital, for she couldn't hold grasp of the deaths of her husband, and her son.

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What's big, red and eats rocks? A big, red Rock-Eater

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how do you stop a train? you cant..

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What is worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings.

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Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

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roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

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How many flies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2.

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Three men walked into a bar. Despite the fact that the bar was not an oblong piece of solid material as many would assume, the men entered through the tavern door simultaneously and found it most uncomfortable and awkward to be squished up against each other for several moments.

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What's white and flies around ? A seagull. What's black and flies around ? A seagull in the darkness.

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whats worse than drinking bad milk? tea bagging a bear trap

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One time I walked into a fat kid..

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Did you know, that every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes?

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What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

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wow, that guy is such a buzz-kill. worse than Buzz Killington!

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A little boy came runing to his mum' mummy...can a little girl have ababy? Mom reply no...so, the boy ran out and told his frnd 'we can play naked again'.,

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What's bigger than your penis? The Empire State Building.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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