why was the woman making a sandwich in the kitchen? because at the age of 3 she faced the hard reality of being nothing more in life then serving her husband to the day she die

Why did the little kid fall down? He was pushed

When life throws you knives, you're probably dead

yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

*******A CELL JOKE******* Mommy Ribosome and Daddy Mitochondria are watching baby nucleus play around in the cytoplasm, when all the sudden baby nucleus falls down and breaks its cell wall. Mommy ribosome is like freaking out like, "OH NO< WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WE NEED TO TAKE HER TO THE E.R.". Then Daddy Mitochondria says, "The smooth ER or the rough ER???"

in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

What do you call a girl who denies that she is one? Justin Beiber

A apple a day is good for your overall health and you should schedule check ups with your doctor to maintain good health and avoid seeing him everyday.

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

Why do Christian protest against gay marriage? They protest because they believe gay marriage is a sin.

Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock? Who's there? Not Mary.

What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costume

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

69

a horse walks into a blender ow

A man walks into a restaurant and ordered a soup. Then, he called the waiter and said the soup tasted funny. The waiter said, "so laugh". the man then killed the guy and sips the soup while laughing.

Why was the African American man afraid of dogs? He had a terrible childhood memory of being violently dry humped by a german shepherd.

Q: What do you call a dad running down a hill? A: A mom running down a hill, I lied about the dad.

Why didn't the boy go to school? He was sick.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens aren't very intelligent and therefore it didn't see the possible dangers that could occur.

What do you call a bird with no wings? Dead

Alex Gedrose.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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