What is ET short for? Extra terrestrial

How do you make a plumber stop sagging? Tickle his crack

Comedy.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are flowers, And daisies are too.

how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

Q: What is black and white, black and white, black and white? A: A Nun falling down the stairs.

What's the difference between roast soup and pea beef? Nothing because neither of them are physically possible; you can't roast soup and you can't pee beef

What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family

Why was the boy dad? Because he was taken advantage of by an older woman during ovulation and impregnated her.

whatdumb and gay stewart price

Why did the baker turn off the oven? He had run out of business

wow, that guy is such a buzz-kill. worse than Buzz Killington!

hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

What do you do when a guy pulls up in a van with piercings and a gay lisp, what do you do? Get in the van.

After waking up at the break of dawn, a man saw his dogs food dish was empty. In slight excitement for his dog to finally eat after his dish being empty all night, he called his dog in from outside, expecting him to go straight to his food dish like always. The dog walked by without noticing.

What did the Jew say the Black man after their meal? "Don't worry, I'll pay the bill."

Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

A woman tells her boyfriend that shes going shopping. Later that day the boyfriend sees her in an alley giving a blow job to a stranger so he says "What are you doing here?"

knock knock who's there your family just died your family just died who? -.-

A polish guy Is sick of being made fun of for his ethnicity, so he decides that he is going to act Italian thinking that no one makes fun of Italians. He stays home for weeks to practice this and one day walks out, up to a store and says"eh, get me some lasagna and zucchini !" the man at the store asks if he's polish.

My friend said that onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him with a watermelon.

A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

wanna hear a joke? woman's rights.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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