God and Allah are having a metaphysical picnic, God says to his fellow deity: "Why do you think so many humans have been killed in our names?" Allah muses upon this for a moment and replies: "Because they think we exist."

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why shouldn't you get a clown angry? Because they'll yell at you.

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What do you get when you cross a taco with a a bungee cord? An inedible taco.

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a man cries out to god.... and god does't reply.

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So this guy's taking a hooker back to a hotel room, right? The woman turns out to be a federal agent investigating prostitution in inner-city inviornments, and the man is promptly arrested. He is now subject to a large fine and 90 days in a county jail.

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whats first than finding a worm in your apple? a blonde who asks you why there is a worm in your apple

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Republicans

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You are in a room with hitler and bin Ladin. You have a gun with 1 bullet. Who do shoot? Don't worry you don't have to make that decision. They are already both dead

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What do you do when you see an epileptic having a fit in the bath? Take him out of the bath, make sure there is nothing they can hurt themselves on, put something soft under their head and loosen their clothing if it’s constricting their breathing.

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ME NAME IS JEFF

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What do you call a black man on a bike? Environmentally friendly.

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What is Corey Jacobs favorite kind of sandwich? Big Jumbo Kahona Burger!

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What do you call a shop dedicated to selling watermelon, fried chicken and corn bread? A poor business model.

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why did the man come out of the closet? because the dark scares him and it smelled like moth balls

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

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A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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My mom told me to shut up because I was screaming as I was strangled.

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A pengiuin walked into a bar. Just kidding, it waddled at an increasingly fast rate.

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Why did the Hindu eat the Mongolian? He tried, the Mongolian raped him.

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Why did the pirate say to the donkey? Rrrrrrrrrrr you a donkey?

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Why did the Jew have so much money? He had a good education and therefore, a high paying job.

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knock. knock. whos there? BOWLING SHOE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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why didnt the deaf man laugh? he was also mute

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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