Sarah got hit by a bus.... Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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GONNA

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Bond. Bond who? James Bond. na-na NA NA na-na na

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whats 2+2? 69 LOL

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face. The horse replies, neigh.

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I'm dressing up as a shia for halloween

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horrible joke I I I I I I I VVV

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Why is it hot outside? Because God made it so.

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when i start seeing A TON of black people what does that mean? im color blind

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Why did little Jimmy drop his ice cream ? He got hit by a bus.

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How do you estimate the number of jippos in an area? Take the dole's numbers from that area and measure how far away they are from the nearest council landfill site.

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A dog walks into a bar and falls on his butt beacause dogs cant walk.

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Why did the the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't be late for his annual check up at the clinic across the street.

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How did Helen Keller's parents discipline her? Hopefully not too sternly. There's not much trouble a blind and deaf girl can get into, one would imagine.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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How do you catch an elephant? Dig a nice deep hole in the ground, and fill it with ashes. Next, line the outside of the hole with peas. When the elephant comes to take a pea, kick it in the ash hole.

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TOFFEES HEAD LYING IN THE GRASS

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What do you call a Serbian-Australian man with no arms, no legs, and two feet. Nick Vujicic

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was Dead.

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If a black person gets a tan, what do you get? A burned black sausage.

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What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney Loves you.

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How do you stop the neighbors kids from jumping the fence into your property? Molest them.

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How do you entertain a bored pharaoh? (written in 1600 BCE - Westcar Papyrus) -You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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