A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

Why was 7 afraid of 6, because 6 raped 5

Why didn't the black lady become a doctor? After being awarded a Guggenheim Achievement Grant for film, she decided rather than going to school for her doctorate to instead spend time traveling in India, doing service work with the country's rather large homeless population.

What is black and white and red all over? A black, red and white picture

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was getting chased by nazis.

Three men walk into a bar. They order drinks. This joke isn't funny.

My nipple is bleeding

What would make a black guy sad? His mom dying on death bed...

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

Doctor, people always laught at me at work! :( What do you do for a living? I am a comedian...

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? There are many things that could be considered worse than finding a worm in one's apple. In addition, the matter of better or worse depends upon the point of view of the person in question, so what is worse than finding a worm in one person's apple may be preferable to finding a worm in another person's apple.

1: I know a lot of people hate Mondays, but my least favorite day of the week is Thursday. 2: Can I ask why? 1: Of course you can. Everyone has free will.

what do you call anybody eating at mcdohnalds? hungry, diabetic people

Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, Jack sat on his candle, and burnt his ass.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name's Dave, Microwave!

There was an old man from Limerick. He was of scottish ancestry and nearing his 76th birthday.

womens sports...

Which is the closest animals to humans? Black people (nig3gers)

So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

Do you like cats? You gotta be kitten me.

Your Mamas So Fat That When She Jumped Into The Ocean All The Whales Swam Around And Started Sinqinq (We Are Family Even Though Your Fatter Than Me.)xD

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why did no one help him up? Because nobody liked him.

why was the asian kid the only one to get an A+ in the test? He spent the longest time studying and was therefore better prepared than the other students.

Knock knock Who's there? Not you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...