what has two eyes and a face? the 5 year old who got raped on his way back home last night.

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what is the difference between joe diragi and jerry sandusky sabdusky only targets human little boys

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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A man and his horse walk into a bar, he is told to leave because animals are not allowed on the property

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How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?. I dont know either it was dark.

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A dermatologist walks into a strip club. He tells the stripper she has hives on her back and that she needs to go to a clinic, then gets up from his lap dance and reports her to management.

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How do you call a cat for it's dinner? Come here cat!

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I avhe dyiaexls.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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whats worse than one bee sting? two bee stings whats worse than two bee stings? the halocaust whats worse than the halocaust? three bee stings

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what did the poor guy get for christmas POVERTY

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Q: What faster than a black man with a t.v A: A jew with a coupon

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Diarrhea

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Why was the man cold? Because he was dead.

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Goat balls.

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An old man walks into a movie theater, has a stroke, and dies as his family screams for help and attempts to revive him to no avail.

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What do potatoes wear to bed? Potatoes don't sleep and don't wear clothes.

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Nah, its fine, I just went to get a popsicle, and its square, so don't get any ideas. Honestly? When I first met "some jerk" calling himself Nero here, I began calling myself Nero, because I thought that the jerk that turned out to be you, Nero himself, sigh. was screwing over his own reputation. But now I realize that what makes you who you are, is that you say whats on your mind without going "oh no what will others think about me, what if this or that happens", you accept yourself for who you are, and if the rest do not, well screw them right? As you told me at first and proved to me during our conversations, you respect and value individuality and integrity. And well, you are a guy, you think like a guy (I honestly dont think we girls think that differently, we are simply socially indoctrinated or "engineered" in order to think that we do), I mean let me say something really honest here. Nero, I only dare say this once, so take me seriously I really want you to fuck me, and yeah, I may say that when we meet too, considering I have not even said it yet, just in my head... Anyway, its not something I am insecure about nor ever was and blahblahblah, the end, oh, and yeah, I really want and need a friend like you.

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What do u call a short Mexican Nothing that's normal

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Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

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What's funnier than seeing a baby falling from the empire state building? Stopping his speed with a shovel

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Your mother is so fat, that the doctor said, "Go on a diet or you will get a Cardiac Infarction."

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Q: What's the difference between black and white? A: A lot...

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What did the Mexican parents name their first born son? Nobody knows. He was adopted by a nice family due to the fact that his biological parents were murdered in cold blood. His foster parents named him Kevin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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