What did the three-leaf clover say to the four-leaf clover? "FREAK!"

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Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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What happened to your face? I walked into a tree

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What did one musician say to the other? "We should have gone to college."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme Others just don't

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roses are red you are dumb no one will care when you die

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Knock knock, COME IN!

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What did the Carbon atom say to the Oxygen atom? Nothing, basic elements are incapable of speech. It requires a culmination of many atoms to form a living human capable of speaking to another human.

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Why was the black man lynched? Because he was found by angry racists in the 1930's.

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if youre reading this its probably because youre on anti-joke.com

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You: Why did hitler go to hell? Them: Why? You: You're an idiot.

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roses are red violets are blue i use refrigerators to keep my food cool

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What's funnier than Carrot Top and Dane Cook combined? Almost anything.

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How do you fall off a building... JUMP.

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I hate Mondays, the man said as he drove to work. Fortunately for him, it was a Wednesday.

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"You know what sucks?" "Vaccuumes?" "You know what metaforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "You know what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? Cause it was dead. Why did the second Koala fall off the tree? Cause it was also dead. Why did the third Koala fall off the tree? It thought the other two were playing a game. Why did the motorcyclist end up in the hospital? He was attacked by falling Koalas!

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Why do jewish women like to get their sons circumcised? They like anything 25% off.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing, but he did purchase whiskey with the little money he had to drink away his misery, and to suppress his suicidal thoughts that were a result of his alcoholism which stemmed from his father's abusive nature.

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What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Ferrari? That was my Ferrari by darragh hamilton

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Knock Knock Whos there? I dunno I didnt answer the door

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What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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