Why did Jake have a bad spring break? Because he got hit by a car and died

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A traveler gets a flat tire on an old farm road. He goes to the door of the neasrest farm and knocks. The farmer and his beautiful 21 year old daughter answer the door. Traveler: "I'm sorry, but I have a flat. Is there any place I can stay until I get it repaired?" Farmer: "Why yes. Our church sponsors a homeless shelter and rehab center down the road.I can give you a ride there if you like?"

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Chuck Norris watches TV.

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Q: How can you tell when your selling a Blondel a microwave A: she will keep asking how many chandler the Tv gets

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Chuck Norris witnessed a crime.What did he really witness? A Jehovah's witness. xD

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? I don't know. He couldn't open it.

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What do you call a fat legless over weight black man called Tom. Tom.

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Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

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What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

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How do you turn a frown upside down? You cannot do such a thing because frowning is the act of sadness. Therefore you cannot nor should not change a persons attitude.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He then proceeds to ask his wife not to leave her clothing around the house.

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why do some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because they can be extreamly delishus and satisfying to eat. Why dont some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because then we would all be too big to fit on earth.

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Why shouldn't gingers smoke before they are 3? Because they have souls and still abide by the same rules!........................................................................................................................................ If you laughed at that you either don't like gingers or should be shot. And by the way... Why did Snape kill Dumbledore? Because he had to.

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Why did the frog die? Because I stapled it onto a boy's face.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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What is white, sticky and tastes great? Milk

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mark lawson likes boys

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Well... My reputation is still kinda exaggerated apparently. What you experienced is called astral projection, some people claim it is the same as lucid dreaming, I beg to differ, the difference is vast. You basically just admitted that people believe much more in you, than you believe in yourself, without believing hypnosis does not work, people are like "bah its just suggestions", its true, but underestimating the power of suggestions is a pretty bad call.

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What's orange and hurts when you get it in your eye? An orange knife.

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What came first the egg or the hen? your mother did, when I had sex with her last night.

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Why is Justin beaber so white? Because his mother and father both are.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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11111

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why did the lady take anti depressants? because she was depressed

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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