What do you call a watermelon in Africa? A watermelon.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish

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Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

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Long joke Your such a downey

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What did the clock say to the book? I have no batteries.

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Roses are dead Violets are too Were all gonna die So are you.

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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Why couldn't the elephant ride a bike? Because he had no thumbs...

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Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

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Whats the difference between harry potter and the Jews? Harry potter could escape the chambers.

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A man comes home early from work to find that his wife is in bed with another man, startled by his presence the wife quickly utters 'it's not what it looks like", the husband however, disregards this comment and later files for a divorce

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Roses are red Violets are blue One fish two fish Red fish blue fish

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What did the black do when a man robbed his house? He called 911

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A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

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Hey hey what did the bald man say to brian moccia? lOL!

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Why did suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock - who's there? Bob -bob who.... Bobs knocking for suzie!

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What's the difference between Michael J. Fox and a blender? Michael J. Fox is a successful actor starring in many movies, and a blender is a kitchen appliance.

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The horse said "nay."

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A man walks into a doctors office and waits for his turn. After his name was called he walked up to the doctor and told him that he kept having hallucinations. The doctor prescribed an antibiotic to help with the mans addiction to LSD.

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How many dislikes can this get?

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I don't have ADHD I just- Hey look a squirrel!

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What are blacks scared of? The kkk

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What did the salad say to the dressing? Nothing! Carrots don't talk!

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Why couldn't the 11-year old get into the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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