What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A unicorn

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Why did the black man laugh at my joke? k.

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Two women were sitting quietly.

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Roses are red violets are blue your dads got hair what happened to you

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how do you see the difference between a ceiling and a floor? people dont walk on a ceiling

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

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What's orange, looks like and orange, probably tastes like an orange, and has no brain? Donald Trump

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How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

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What is a chicken? Because 7, 8, 9.

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A hispanic priest with a huge boner walks into a bar.

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what is white on top and black on the bottom? society... ha ha

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What do you call a man or woman who has sex, records it on video, and sells the recordings for money? A porn star.

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The more I learn to understand myself, the more true I am towards my values the less human I feel. The irony is, that there will always be other humans feelng the same.

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Tell you something funny.

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Why couldn't the drunken man walk in a straight line? Because someone shot him in the face.

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Have you heartd about the blond that confused winow putty for KY jelly? Her windows fell out.

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A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

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Knock knock Who's there ... Hello? Is there anyone there? (In the bushes) Ha! He'll never suspect us!

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? One is a tasty Italian food the other is a respected member of society

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Did you hear that the actress, Reese what's-her-name, got stabbed to death? Witherspoon? No, with a knife.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

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What's red, white and blue? You're mother on her period after she had sex. I don't know where the blue came from.

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"Have you guys ever seen Derrek Ashmores sisters? They are DTF if you know what I mean" - Jesse Ziegenbein

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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