Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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Q: a man in a camry runs over his wife. who's fault is it? A: toyota and their breaks.

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What do black people and tables have in common? Nothing.

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what did the blind, deaf, retarded child, without any arms or legs get for Christmas? nothing, his parents are dead

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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A fish walks into a bar Fish dont walk

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On a scale of 1 to drunk how ten are you?

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Why do dead Republicans float? Their corpse's mass-to-volume ratio is less than the water they displace. It is very sad.

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Why was the little boy late to school Cause he walked on a landmine

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What is a vampires favorite desert? Vampires aren't real.

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Knock knock Who's there? I'm the Dick I'm the dick who? I'm the Dick Cheney

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Why did Dave buy a playstation? Because he wanted one.

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Your Mum is soo fat.

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A boss walks into a bar and hires the first man he sees. He fires everyone else, no matter what their occupation.

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Who invented the Iceberg Salad? The Titanic

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

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What's big, hard, in the water, and isolated? Shutter Island

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If a tree falls, and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? No. While the falling tree surely creates mechanical oscillations in the air, sound is defined as the mechanical oscillations in the air perceived by humans. Therefore, since no humans were around to hear the tree fall, it did not create a sound.

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A man walks into a bar He's an alcoholic and it's ruining his family

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Ask me if I'm a giraffe Are you a giraffe? Yes

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Did the chicken cross the road? No because it was in a fenced in area like all farm animals should be

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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