What drink is dark yellow and freshly squeezed from one of the most healthy snacks? Piss.

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What's Mackaulay Culkin's favorite salad dressing? Neverland Ranch.

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What did you say? I'm blind. (Did not write this meaning to be offensive)

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Why did the gay man buy a prius? because it is a very fuel efficient car and will save him a lot of money of gas

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What do you call a man with a gun? An accident waiting to happen.

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

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Q.Why was the fat man sweeting A. Because he just ran and his body is trying to maintain thermal equilibrium

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a passing car.

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What do you call a person who uses food stamps? Poor. What do you call a black person who uses food stamps? Still poor.

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A man walked into a bar 2 hours later he died from drinking and driving

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What starts with P and ends in O-R-N? Popcorn.

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why did the little old lady die? she was mugged then shot in the head 5 times.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

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how come the jews were not laughing? because they were in a concentration camp

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he got hit by a fridge. Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she got hit by a fridge. Why couldn't the cat drink its milk? Because it had no face.

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What did the student say to the teacher, after being assigned homework? This isn't my best subject, can I stay after class for tutoring?

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What's round, has two hands, and tells time? Some fat guy I know, with a watch.

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Wanna hear a really dirty joke the boy fell in the mud

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Q: what do you call an icy road? A: dangerous

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Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels.

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A buissnes man walks into a meeting and says hello i'm a buissnesman

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What's the best way to pick up girls? Lift with your legs, not your back.

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Q: If a Hungarian boy grows up to be a very successful payroll manager and learns to love and hate, show compassion while firing someone, and how to re-image the entire white house's security system, how many pickles are in the doghouse? A: 17

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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