Who Lives in a Pineapple Under the Sea? No one, its physically impossible to live in a fruit and breathe under water

what do call a girl with a waterslide nose? Ava Sherman

What's worse than a shotgoun to the balls? Nothing.

life is like a box of chocolates... it doesnt last long for fat peopl

Meow.

A jewish lady is cleaning a house to make some extra money. Its great that she can still find work in this economy.

Why didn't Megan do her homework? Although Megan was an intelligent girl who had always done well academically, she remained unconvinced that anything taught in school held practical or philosophical importance.

A rabbi, a nun, a priest, a hooker, a stripper, 2 secret servicemen, a teacher, a midget, a ginger, a rodeo clown, a nascar driver, a homosexual native american, a heterosexual native american, 2 portuguese tuba players, an african american taxi driver, a blind man, his seeing eye dog, a bartender, 2 minor league baseball players, 3 lesbian mexican salsa dance instructors and a dwarf are all in a bar. They all had a good time and the teacher and one ol the portuguese tuba players ended up becoming facebook friends.

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

A blind man is jumped and doesn't see it coming

What starts with ''F" ends in "uck" and usually means excitement? A Firetruck

Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

roses are red pickles are green i like your legs and whats in between

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -To. - To Who? -To whom.

Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

Why did the priest blow a kiss and waved to the little girl? She was his daughter. Why did the daughter's mother call the cops on the priest? Child support

Why are Jewish men curcumsized? Because Jewish women wont put their hands on anything that's not 20% off

A Black Man Walks Into A Club.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What do you call a blue horse with two legs and five eyes? A blue horse with two legs and five eyes.

Why did the tourist cross the road? He was sightseeing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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