When life gives you lemons, you must also have a proportionally sufficient amount of both water and sugar in order to make lemonade.

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a woman gets hit by a motorcycle whose fault was it?......... the man's, he shouldn't have driven the motorcycle in the kitchen

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Yo mama so fat! Really she should get on an exercise program and watch her diet, as she is at higher risk for diabetes and other health issues

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You know that song "FIrework" by Katy Perry? Well, I ate a hotdog last night.

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What's the difference between shoes and a ginger? Shoes do the kicking.

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What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

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What do you call a group of geese? A giggle

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

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How do you call a guy with a school bus on his head? Dead. It's highly unlikely that a man would be able to withstand the weight of a massive school bus on his head and survive.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

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A duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Put it on my bill."

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Knock Knock Whose there? Get out of the bathroom Get out of the bathroom who? No, your in the bathroom

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What's awesome and rides a unicycle? Rollercoasters. I lied about the unicycle.

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What is more scary than an AK47,blood,and 99999 naughty children? Nothing problaly :p

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whats a worse movie than saw I don't know my mom won't let me watch any

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Did you hear the one about the bus driver? Me neither

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WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

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soccer

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A man walks into a bar and utters profanity because he's hit his head on a protruding metal object that cannot move out of the way and has therefore made him look stupid because he neglected to walk around it.

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Laura Pratz..

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whats the difference between a chicken and a grape? there both green exept for the chicken

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Chuck Norris doesn't answer the phone - he doesn't have one at the moment

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Yo momma's so fat she got her own zip code! except she doesn't because zip codes are reserved for much larger areas than that of your mother.

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What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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