Why are objects in your mirror closer than they appear? Because they are closer than they appear.

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How do you avoid being hit with a toaster? You don't walk past the man hitting you with a toaster.

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Whats funnier than Steven Yuhasz being Straight? Womens Rights.

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Why was Mrs. Clause mad at Santa Clause? Because he was hanging out with three hoes, Ho, Ho, and Ho

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how do you know when an elephant been in your refridgrator The door wont close

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Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8 knifed 10.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A: Cancer

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What happened when the Asain woman got in her car? A speeding drunk driver hit her and now she is paralyzed from the neck down.. Its a tragic story

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Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

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When life throws you lemons, duck.

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In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

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fatest boner fatest boner fatest boner to adam ramsden

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Where did the farmer take his pigs on Saturday afternoon? the Slaughterhouse

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I walk into a bar...

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Why was Soren gay? Because he likes to eat men's Penises!

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What's the difference between a dog and a urologist? A dog is a domesticated canine, and a urologist studies urine.

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If you have 5 dollars, and Chuck Norris has 5 dollars, you are both very poor.

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Whats white? A fridge

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Why is the country in a national deficit? Because the Illuminati want to control all human beings in a socialist new world order.

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What did the doctor say to the pregnant mother? Your babies dead

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have PTSD. Time to kill myself.

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roses are green violets are red im shooting heroine into my head

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lets have sex, ok, but itll have to be anal, cuz im a guy xoxox danni

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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