how do you get an old man to fall? tip over his wheelchair

What did the football coach say to fire up his team? Nothing. He was not legally allowed to say anything to his team as they were being locked out by the coach's boss, the owner of the team and anything that he said to them could lose him his job.

Why can't the little girl ride a bike? She has Osteoporosis and falling would shatter her bones.

Why did the chicken cros- oh he got hit by a car.

What happens when you run over a mexican? The country gets one less illegal immigrant.

The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

Why did the blind man itch his knee? He has cancer

What did the furnace say to the Jew? Nothing, as it is an inanimate object and cannot communicate.

Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

Why did the American run over the black man. Because he didn't see him standing there.

What's tan, red, black and brown? Your face. Two days later... In the mausoleum. "Your face"

Whats funnier than a pile of dead babies? A young girl you know personally, completely alone with leukemia.

Take My Wife- Because as it stands, I'm having frequent, toe-curling, unprotected sex with your wife. And that just doesnt seem fair.

*Knock knock* Who's there? *Silence* (The person knocking is deaf)

What is the most confusing day for chavs? Fathers day

How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

Why did the chicken cross the street? I don't know really

I banged your mom so hard that she got a urinary tract infection.

Q. What do you get when a banana and a person mate? A. The banana suffocates

Dead baby jokes aren't funny, dead babies are though.

A black man and a white man crash their cars. they promptly exchange insurance information and apologize to each other about the inconvenience.

A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest is a former alcoholic, and has the strength to turn around and leave.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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