Every sixty seconds in Africa... a minute passes - plz like to save Africa!

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A man was mowing the lawn. The mower stops, so he look to see if something stuck in the blades. What did he pull out? Nothing, the gas ran out.

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So a hispanic man and a black man jump from a tree, which one hits the ground first? The hispanic man, the rope caught the black man.

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(This is a joke made up by the young son of a friend of mine many years ago. It is still one of my favorite jokes.) Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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An elderly man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey Dad!" The old man replies, "Hi son. I'll have a Bud Light." The bartender serves his dad a Bud Light and says, "I'm thinking about going back to school to become a doctor." The old man says, "I'm an alcoholic." The bartender replies, "Great, another Bud Light coming up!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? THE CHICKEN!

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How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

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nock nock " whos there" , "open the door and you will see

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What is big and wet and smells like mushrooms? A big wet mushroom.

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Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

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What's the difference between oreos and your opinion? I asked for your opinion.

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Why did the mexican mow the lawn. Because the grass in his front yard is longer than he likes it .

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Remember IRON MAN 3! Subscribe to www.prettypleasehelpmeforgethatpieceofshitmovie.com

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How do you find out the population of Mexico? The census.

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How do you save a drowning Asian teenage boy? You get him out of the water.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Houlocaust. What's worse than the Houlocaust? Nothing, the Haulocaust was one of the most horrible instances of inhumanity in recorded history.

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So Helen Keller walks into a bar...

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Q: What is George Harrison's favorite hairstyle? A: How can we know? He's dead!

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Why was the chicken sad because it lost it's family

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life is like a penis, short but feels long when it's hard.

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How do you make Al Gore cry? Kill his daughter.

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What the best part of having sex with twenty-eight year olds? Theres 20 of them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops