How old is the old man? Probably how old he is

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Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? Well that would be crude and insensitive to ask a person with dementia to do a task so easily performed by a person who is not non compos mentis.

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What is white on the inside and red on the outside? An apple.

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jess always squints her eyes when making a point

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Two muffins are in an oven. After ten minutes at 375 degrees, they were pulled out, allowed to cool, and eaten.

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Your mother is so ugly that your father no lomger finds her attractive

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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What did King Tut say when he got scared? How would I know? It was over a thousand years ago.

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what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

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How many Legos can you stick up your nose? I'm sure its very painful and considered stupid so don't try it.

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A zookeeper, a shoemaker, and a guy named Billy Jones walks into a bar. The bartender says "sorry, we closed". So they left.

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Do you know what the cop said to the black guy? Your free to go

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whats the best kind of chocolate bar? a larsbar

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Set a restriction on something she enjoys that is equal to the degree of her misbehavior.

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What did the homeless man's sign say? It didn't say anything. You had to read it.

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Why did the girl fall down the hill? Her boyfriend pushed her.

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What did the black kid get for his birthday? A bike, just what he asked for.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He believed pedestrians had the right

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A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

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Why did the Jew go to prison. He slaughtered his family.

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Once upon a time, there was a a loving couple. When they first kissed, the girl's heart skipped a beat, but it wasn't because of love. It was a heart murmur. She died. The end.

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Q: What do you do when you see a half dead black guy on your front lawn? A: Call the ambulance because he is dying

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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