(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? - Nothing This homeless man got a gift for his Birthday. What happened to the gift? - It got stolen the following day What did this homeless man get for New Year? - Still nothing Get real.

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Why did the plane crash? Cause the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

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so if you need 20 dollars and you just kicked your cat how old is your mom. cake because you are a 666 member.

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Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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What's worse than no wifi Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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How do you get a Blonde to switch seats with you? Ask her politely.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas?

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Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

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why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

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What do you call a really dumb girl with downs? Ashley Howard

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Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

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What's short, white, and is sick and tired of your shit? A toilet. What's white and killed Elvis? Also a toilet.

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Two families of pedophiles go to the beach. One of the dads lays down to suntan and looks at the other dad. "Hey! Get out of my son!" he exclaims.

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Man U

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What did Helen Keller say? Obcojbcidjbcidjbdijcbd

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What do you call a jew with no money It doesn't really matter because all jews have money

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I don't believe in giraffes.

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Knock knock! Who's there? ... There was no reply because the person who knocked was the mailman delivering a package, and he had a tight schedule so he couldn't stay around to chat.

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What did the jew get for christmas nothing because he doesnt celebrate christmas.

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Q: What happened to the man who died? A: Nothing, there is no afterlife.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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