You know what the best part about sleeping pills is? No, what is it? Zzzzzzzzzzz

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What did the black man get for christmas? A present.

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If through some strange space-time paradox, Chuck Norris ever had to fight himself, Chuck Norris would-- What am I saying, that would never happen!

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why cant dinosaurs talk? because they're all dead.

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Why did the Mexican mow his neighbors lawn? Because the Mexican was 12 years old and his neighbor was paying him $20 to mow the lawn.

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One time at band camp.............that's it........

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how do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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Why couldn't the bunny hop? Because it lost both it's legs

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A Duck walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "I'd like to buy some peanuts." The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't sell peanuts." The duck turns around and leaves.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners unfamiliar with the Latin alphabet.

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Why did Stephen Hawking ask for pizza? Because he was hungry.

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What did the white man say to the muslim? Hi

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How do you make a Muslim mad? You burn the Quran.

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What do you call an Ethiopian with buck teeth? Lucky to have teeth.

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What do you call a black man that robs a bank? A bank robber

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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You know what helps with back pain? If you lick my butt hole.

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Whats 89 x 67? Sponge. Whats 10 + 9? 19 Whats 9 + 10? 21!

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what do you call a man with no @ss? d1ckhead

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Women's Rights

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Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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Why was the little kid bullied? Because his name was Hugh Jass.

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why did the baby cross the road...? cause he was chained to my bumper

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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