Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Many men trespass on my property to taste my milk based beverages. They insist that it's quality is superior to yours. I could teach you how to make such milk based beverages, but I would have to levy a fee.

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Why did the leaf fall of the tree? Because it was fall

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a doorstep? A: Matt.

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Why did the unicorn cross the road? i dont know. unicorns arent real

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I don't have ADHD I just- Hey look a squirrel!

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A girl talks to her boyfriend about collage. What is his responce? Nothing. No one talks about college.

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How does a muslim make his parents proud? He gets good grades.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a nest of worms in your apple.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Nothing. Cats can't talk.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and mop. In turns out the bartender was a paranoid schizophrenic and was hallucinating.

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why did the chicken cross the road cause i fucked your mom

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Roses are red Violets are blue Dandelions are weeds

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for doing nothing? A black man

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umm idk what joke to write down so yea and so rate this a thumbs up! okay bc this is an awesome joke...right right right yea ik!

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We are unhappy, unfilled because we cannot complete our dream, it is always about us, then again, is wanting the best for others being selfish?

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anti jokes are gay...your all gay

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You have 6 basketballs. One rolls away. How many do you have? None because your family has a low income, lives in a broken down trailer, and has 5 other kids to supply for.

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

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Dylan is gay

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Cars were invented after her death, so she never had the opportunity to learn.

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there is a black guy and a mexican in a car whos driving? a cop

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops