Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

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A man walked on the street where he saw an other man. The two men said: "Hi!" to each other and walked together down the road. Then one of the men got ran over by a car. The other man said: "ROFL".

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To clowns walk into a bar. They don't notice each other because as soon as they walk to a 5-yard radius, the length that was said to be the range of a clowns eyesight (which was actually said by a controversial scientist, looked on as a madman; he created a whole clown-eyesight-range conspiracy), when a fire starts, creating a huge apocalyptic event. However, the two clowns go into the bar unphased. Both clowns then turn opposite directions. The clown on the right sits down with his drink and takes out his book about the Victorian Era. He constantly checks his watch. The clown on the left disapears into the croud, and steals french fries from table 36. After three hours, they both walk to the back of the bar, simultaneously tying their shoes not noticing their similarity in career choices. They both open a door marked PRIVATE (while tying their shoes). After sixteen days of exactly the same thing happening repeatedly... Both clowns see eachother on the way out of the bar. Little do the know that they are being watched by the scientist I mentioned earlier. Two Years Later Both clowns die instantly after being attacked by a giant war hammer-wielding octopus on the way home from the circus.

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a Jew had a small nose

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Theres a blonde and a brunette at a party. The redhead is left out because she has no soul.

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How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

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Why did timmy fall off his bike? Someone threw a fridge at hm

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What happened to the homosexual jiggalo? He ended up getting aids from having anal sex with various men which is not the best idea because the anus where poop comes from.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

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Why did the chinese doctor get fired? Because he was involved in a malpractice suit.

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Q: What do you call a half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building? A: A half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building.

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roses are red violets are blue count my five damn finger , and the third one is for you!!!!!!!!

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Yes, I did not begin this alone, but things got complicated, you know who Alex Knight is right?

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Chuck Norris can fly around the world in under 2 days. In an airplane.

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Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

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Yo Mama is so white, people call her caucasian.

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A redhead and a blonde both go out to smoke a cigarette. They are both at risk of lung cancer.

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Q:why did the girl fall off the swing set? A:she had no arms

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*Knock knock! "Who's there?" "Jehovah's witness" .....

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue,All you HATERS of J. Bieber, Go suck your MOTHER.

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Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

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why didnt you take a shower? because my house burnt down

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what can you say about a midget dressed as a clown? he had a terrible childhood.

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Why is Justin Bieber gay? He prefers the companionship of homosexual relationship to that of a heterosexual one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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