Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

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What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

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you go up your hole down your hole between your hole and you rock and roll

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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why couldn't the old man play basketball? he lacked the physical dexterity, had asthma, and had no arms.

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A man goes to a doctor and says , "My arm hurts in 3 places." the doctor says, "Dont go to those places.

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whats the difference between me and callum ? one soul.

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If you are my friend like it!

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A middle-class family went away on vacation. While they were gone, a pyromaniac burnt down their house. Their cat was still inside.

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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Today is my birthday.... Goodbye cruel world

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What did the little boy say before he succumbed to cancer? Nothing. It was too painful.

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Hej Erik och Leo!!

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Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

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Anti jokes are stupid Anti jokes are dumb I'm a pedophile, You better run.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died.

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The term "shots fired" often reminds me of the time a couple of buddies had a drinking contest and I shoved a lit cigarette down the loser's throat

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What do you get when you don't wear protection? A baby.

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How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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Why did the potato cross the road? It didn't. A potato is a vegetable. It cannot walk, think or speak.

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Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

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Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

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why did the chicken cross the road? to give a doctor the cure for cancer but some ass hole ran him over

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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