Your mother is so old that her prom theme was fire

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the man with five penises say? I have 5 penises.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Little Jimmy was afraid, and didn't like Santa Claus. So one Christmas Eve, he poured rat poison in Santa's milk. Little Jimmy no longer has parents.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

How did the fat woman survive the car accident? She had on her seat belt.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How many Jews can you fit in an oven? None, it's illegal.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Knock knock. Who's there? Josh. Lettuce who? I didn't say "lettuce"... I said Josh.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why, if you are blending a baby, should you put it in feet first? So you can look in to it's eyes when masturbating.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's brown and green, has six legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man and his dog walk into the park, the man grabs a ball and chucks it for the dog. The dog can not chase after the ball because he has no legs and bites his owners leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Ginger woodpecker throbbing in the moonlight

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How can you tell if a woman is a man? If she has a penis

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mother is so white that when she goes to the beach she has to wear sunscrean to avoid being badly sun burned.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

hey jimmy! hey bob -.- jimmy, pls pls explain how to do this.. ): see your mom? yea... do it like we did her (OOOHHHH!)

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What happened to the black man when his alarm went off? He got up and took a shower. Then he got dressed and went to church because it was Sunday.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Your mother is so fat that she's more prone to cardiovascular disease than other people who stick to the proper BMI or body mass index

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock. who's there? well, its not suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Guy 1: Why did Captain Hook die? Guy 2: Because he wiped his anus with a hook? Guy 1: No, because everyone dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, My Heart Skips A Beat, When I Think Of You! :D

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was tired of working for the man.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did Billy drop his ice-cream? He got stabbed multiple times

thumb_up thumb_down -5

JUST KIDDING^

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops