What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

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Hey Eliza, thanks, while I appreciate the help, Alice is crying in a corner and refusing to get up, I wont lie, for a moment there I could "see voices and music" and valium has taken care of the ptsd (and blown most of my brain, which is nice for a change). With that said, im on 40 mg ritalin which is a lot, but I need it, besides I can handle the anxiety. I have no idea who the guy typing this is, but he is following me to the letter, so thats good enough, except his typos being worse than mine, which is pretty good for a guy that barely speaks english. Sorry Eliza, but Alice is having a breakdown here, ill talk her down a bit first, she tries to hide it, but she is far more worried about me than I am, which is nice, just not like this, ill be right back with you.

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what did the cerial killer get for christmas an electric chair

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Knock Knock Who's There? No One You're Crazy

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven raped and murdered his family.

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How do you get a black man down from a tree? Cut the rope!

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what is an antijoke? a type of comedy in which the joke ends in an antivlimax that it is funny in its own right GDS*

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How do you make transportation in Harlem easier? Fix the roads and put in more stoplights.

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What do you call a baby with no future? A baby dying at birth.

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What did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They didn't. She was a blind deaf-mute, there was very little she could do wrong

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Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

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what do a parrot and a hippo have in common? i want to kill every non white human being!!!!

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Whats the difference between a soccer ball and a baby? Babies cry when I kick them.

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poop

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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What is black and white and red all over? Yemen's national flag.

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A young man spent his summer as an intern at a school. He eventually became a real estate agent but it was a pretty cool experience.

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did u ever hear a bird joke "no" hawkword

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Wheres my hood? Behind your neck.

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Whats a dwarf running A running dwarf

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What starts with N, ends with R, and is a black guy? NeighboR!

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A red-head, a brunette, and a blonde are playing hide-and-seek. Hide-and-seek is a fun game, so they probably had a great time.

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How many people does it take to screw a light bulb? One, it's all the sex they can get.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are rather unintelligent animals which clearly underestimate the dangers of crossing a busy road.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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