A black guy and a white guy are in a car. What is going to happen? They will arrive at their destination.

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Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

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Burger King cashier: Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? Man: I'm on team I'm freaking hungry; now give me my food!

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What's worse than breaking a leg? Breaking two legs.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far from its body.

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What follows 2 days of rain? Statistically more rain, but you'll have to check the weather report to be sure.

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roses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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Roses are red Violets are blue These are facts that many people know

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Knock knock. Whos there? The police, your wife is dead. The police, your wife is dead who? Sir, this isn't a joke.

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TIMMY

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What do you call a black doctor? Doctor.

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What is the difference between an obese white man, and a physically fit black man? Their weight and skin color.

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I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

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*******A CELL JOKE******* Mommy Ribosome and Daddy Mitochondria are watching baby nucleus play around in the cytoplasm, when all the sudden baby nucleus falls down and breaks its cell wall. Mommy ribosome is like freaking out like, "OH NO< WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO WE NEED TO TAKE HER TO THE E.R.". Then Daddy Mitochondria says, "The smooth ER or the rough ER???"

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Roses are red, Violet are violet, not blue, dumbass.

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A man walked into a house, He never came back out as he fell down the stairs and snapped his neck, His family mourn him everyday.

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Whats green and smells like ass? My ass. I lied about the green..

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What has an orange t shirt A dick I lied about the shirt

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her

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How can you kill a blonde? Hack her to bits.

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Why was the firefighter carrying a hot girl? Because her house was on fire.

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what did the 14 year old boy get for christmas? nothing because he his sitting in prison for killin his parents and is serving a life sentence.

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Why did Michael Jackson like 24 year olds? Because they are apart of humanity and he had no reason to dislike them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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