Whats the difference between a cow and another cow Help my dogs eating me

knock knock Dave's not here.

I was just entering the toilet in a transport cafe just as a lorry driver was coming out. "I wouldn't go in there mate if I was you" he said "Why does it smell?" I enquired "No I've just murdered a prostitute"

You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon

Why did the girl fall off her bike? Someone threw a piano at her.

Whats red and eats like dog? A fox.

rocky is staring at us from outside...

What's more annoying than Minion quotes? That the girl in the basement keeps screaming for help.

why did the Japanese father cry? because when america bombed japan in wwll it happened to kill the rest of his family

Listen, I do not really care anymore, I admit it, I dont mind screwing with people, but if your name is Tifa, my name is lets see... Solid Snake, yeah, but call me big boss. Listen, be honest with me, if you do not trust me, just do not give me a random name, Tifa as in Tifa Lockheart? Final Fantasy? Wake up, girl/guy, you are losing your touch at this.

How many jews can you fit in a buick? 6...only if you squeeze 4 in the back.

Why did the man pull out his chainsaw? To get rid of a tree in his front yard.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? Lick his dog's penis.

Why did the atheist start snoring in his sleep? He has a naturally small airway and fairly large tonsils.

Why did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

What is hotter than a lightbulb. The Sun.

Why was the little Latino boy sad? Because his father sexually molested him earlier in the evening.

What do you get when you cross an alligator and a kangaroo? Nothing. An alligator is a reptile and a kangaroo is a mammal, therefore it is impossible for them to breed.

What's more fun that being raped? Not being raped.

Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

Knock Knock Come in. Thanks.

A black man walks into a KFC. He buys a bucket of chicken, then distributes it to several homeless men he supports off of his meager income because he knows their situations are much worse than his.

What do family members and a loaf of bread have in common? If you smash them with a hammer they die.

What do you call a redneck in a propane store? A customer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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