Gestapo.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

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George Bush.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you suck your own dick.

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Your mom is so old, -just kidding. I know she died at a young age.

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The BCS

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Q:When a terrorist attack happened what did the woman with the 1 leg say? A: HOP for your lives!!!!

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your mama so fat she should go see a doctor.

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So, why is winter so terrible? Because, Napoleon was stopped by winter and we aren't all French.

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If you saw two cowboys in a kitchen, which would be the real one? Why do you automatically assume one of them is false, or that either of them is real?

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What did the man say to his wife at the funeral. Nothing, he was dead

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She didn't pass her driving test.

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? 2 weeks to live...

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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Why did the car stop? The driver had a stroke

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Every 60 seconds in Africa.... A minute passes.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Fetus Blood. Due to the low concentration of iron, it gives it an aroma of paint.

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Why are black people more athletic than whites? Black people originate from Africa, where they lived in a world where athletic ability created natural selection. The most athletic were able to escape dangers of the jungle such as dangerous animals, and were also most apt to find food to survive. Then when the slave trade occured, only the strongest and best fit survived the trip to America and the hard labor. Also, given the socio-economic trends of the United States, African Americans are more likely to grow up in an environment where they have limited opportunity to make a living, besides professional sports, so they play cheap sports like basketball.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? The chicken doesnt understand the concept of a street so it was most likely just wandering across the street

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So you into art? You been to Louvre by the way?

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Q: What did the homeless man get on his Birthday? A: Hypothermia.

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this is an anti joke so it has no punch line :D

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Person 1: "Broo my dicks like 19 inches!" Person 2: "Thas not healthy, an erection that big will deprive your brain of too much blood and kill you."

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Why did the blonde walk into the men's restroom? Because the blonde was a man who needed to expel his feculent waste.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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