if life throws you lemons you must be dyslexic

What did the Asian say after he had a nightmare? Nothing his nightmare was actually reality and a dishwasher fell on him and killed him.

what happened to the black man that fell of the bridge? he drowned due to the fact the african-americans do not swim very well.

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What did Washington say to his men before they got into the boat? Men, get in the boat!

my mom texted me telling me that my dog died... then she texted me the letters LOL... i texted back asking wat was funny!? she thought it ment 'lots of love' :p

why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

What do you say to a very ambitious dyslexic child? You're ambition is inspiring and I encourage you to follow your dreams. Some of the worlds greatest people, including Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, and Winston Churchill were dyslexic. Your drive is much bigger than your disorder.

A dirty joke Three white horse's are walking down a trail one falls in the mud

Q: WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A SKINNY PERSON AND A JESSE? Answer: THE SKINNY PERSON IS VERY LEAN AND THE FAT PERSON IS VERY JELL-OUS

Who's there? Knock Knock.

People are a lot like slinkies. Not really good for anything, but still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

The EPA.

Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

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-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Granny -You don't sound like Granny... -Just let me in little boy. -MOM!!!!!

Knock Knock Who's there? Boo To whom is Boo?

Q. why did the boy who just had his first kiss feel no emotion? A. He got hit a Croquet mallet and died

Whats worse than a truck full of dead babies? A live baby trying to eat his way out.

I just found my mum has Alzheimer's, I hope it isn't contagious cause my mum has it too

How many elephants can you fit in a mini? None. There are no affordable cars large enough to fit a fully grown elephant.

Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. It is ignorant and offensive to judge the world of cardinal numbers, where protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary, by the standards of human societies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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