I love telling anti jokes rather than jokes because I was born with a rare case of ebola and suffer from alcoholicationism

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Roses are red, Stones are grey, This poem is obvious, You don't say??

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Knock. Knock Who's there? Jim. Jim who? Jim your best friend.

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What is worse than 50 dead babies stapled to trees? One baby stapled to 50 trees. What is worse than one baby stapled to 50 trees? One tree stapled to 50 babies.

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Why was Sally gone for her father's birthday? She went on a camping trip with her friends. Sally's friends were brutally murdered and she was kidnapped. The kidnapper cut off her arms and legs and left her in the middle of a suburban intersection late at night. The autopsy revealed that Sally died from blood loss from losing her limbs. It also revealed that she had contracted a fast growing tumor in her brain which would have most likely killed her within days of the murder anyway. Her family was living in the country illegally so her DNA did not reveal a computer file of her person. Her parents were not informed of her death for years because of this. When it was determined that the victim was the parents' daughter they were arrested for living in the country illegally and were not able to have a funeral.

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what do you call a man who makes fun of womens rights? Single

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

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Why are tests such a pain in the ass? Because your vomiting shit you'd learned the night before.

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What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Finding a repeated joke about no armed susy falling off a swing.

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what happens when Pinocchio says "My nose is growing"?

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Dan was friends with Dick. Dick likes to give massages to Dan. Dan's favorite is Dickie's special mixture. He will remember Dick, his favorite personal assisatant for life. CREEPER

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An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman walk into a bar. It happens frequently at UK airports.

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What do you get when you cross a Dachshund and a Nazi? Bestiality. Ew.

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What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? A Holocaust. What's worse than a Holocaust? 3 bee stings.

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What kind of cheese is not you cheese? Not your cheese.

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what do you call a black women that got an abortion a crime stopper

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Why did the sprinter lose the race He had no legs

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33

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there was a blind kid and a man wearing a WWJD & Livstrong bracelet touched his eyes and he could see. He wasn't used to the light and walked into traffic and died instantly.

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What's long and black? A line at KFC.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Well, she did.

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A hipster gets summoned for jury duty. The case is solved promptly and everyone goes home happy.

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how do you torched helen Keller? put her Ina round room and tell her the bathroom is around the corner

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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