How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

What did the muffin say to the other? This isn't logical

patient: Doctor, It hurts when I go like this. doctor: Don't do that.

Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

Part 1 - Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms! Part 2 - Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy!

Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

How many WOMEN does it take to change a light bulb? YOU ALREADY KNOW ITS GONNA BE MORE THAN ONE!

roses are red, voilets are creepy, i can beat you in call of duty

Why did the little boy and the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because they were dead.

What's black and buried in my backyard? An African American, I'm a member of the Ku Klux Klan

ObamaCare

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

What do you call a mexican riding a bike? A cyclist.

7>6

What do you feel when you kill a terrorist? Recoil -USMC

Knock Knock Who's there? It's actually much safer to look through the peep hole than it is to let a stranger know you are home.

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy Wuzzy died of cancer

How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

Why did The chicken cross the road? To get ran over.

what happend when a blind guy tried to save a guy from a fire big mistake they both died

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

Why couldn't the 10-year-old go to the moon? Because it's the Moo-oo-ooo... no you can't come!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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