What do you call a black man in space An astronaut

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*knock knock* Who's there? ...Who's there?... *opens door to find a dead baby on the front door step*

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I guess we will have to see, if I where to one day use my ways of thinking with the intention to become the most corrupt politician of them all, do you think I would succeed?

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrarri? A dead baby is a non-living human, while a Ferrarri is a brand of car.

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why did the lesbians shop at modell's? because they thought the store had reasonable prices and considerable discounts

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1 error prohibited this post from being saved There were problems with the following fields: * Body can't be blank

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What did the Homosexual say to the Southern American? I'm A Homosexual. What did the Southern American say back? I Respect That.

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Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

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Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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how now brown cow. WTF.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

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Period Blood

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What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? Wow, I need to lighten up on the acid.

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Jesus steps out of a boat, and walks across the water to shore. He's such a show of. Only an attention whore would leave a boat and walk across water for no good reason.

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Why don't women drive more? Because statistically the man offers to drive more frequently

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Q: What is George Harrison's favorite hairstyle? A: How can we know? He's dead!

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Why cant helen keller drive Because shes a woman

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What do you call a clock with no hands? Broken.

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How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? Purple because, ice-cream has no bones.

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Why did Sarah fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

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What do you call the man with no arms and no legs? Jeff. Because that's his ****ing name.

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brandon ya twwat

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What do you find....... there's a..........

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Mr.Green walks into the class. He is alone with no wife and no kids and suffers from depression. His salary is below average and he can't pay the rent this week so he'll probably get evicted. He has aids. He will die in 2 weeks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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