Three gay men walk into a bar and there is only one three-legged stool. What do they do? --One man politely tells one of the other men to have a seat and then the two remaining men leave and have a one-night stand.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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What's worse than losing something? Dieing.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke her face

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Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

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If pro is the opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress? Digress

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What do you say to a black man driving a car? Taxi

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Why did the sperm cross the road? It didn't, as sperm cells have tails not legs, and are therefore incapable of crossing roads.

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The ability to live the life of a dead person.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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Hello Braydon I am at home where are you?

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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed? At the bottom.

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Why wasn't the black woman allowed on the bus? It was rush hour and the bus was full.

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Q: Why couldnt the kid feel his legs A: He had no arms

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What did the doctor say to his dying patient? Shit happens.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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Johnny just finished his pie.

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A theif walks into a blonde ladies apartment. The theif takes all of her valuable belongings, leaving her life in shambles.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all stuck on a desert island together. They eventually succumb to dehydration and heat exhaustion. They lasted five days.

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Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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What do you call a dirty black person? Unhygienic

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Are those two people having sex? Yes, I think they are.

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Whats gay and has wheels? Alex Egbert, I lied about the wheels

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what is a bracket? a bracket

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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