Jesus once got nailed to a cross, beaten and gave his life in order to prove he was immortal. Safe to say, people remain impressed even 2000 years later. Moral: Lol, hey, its quite a feat, but what life did he give if he was immortal? Jesus is a okay dude though, he stole donkeys from stables (for transport) and when his disciples asked if stealing was bad he replied: God will provide for them. Awesome.

Amedeo Clemente Modigliani was an Italian artist who worked mainly in France. Primarily a figurative artist, he became known for paintings and sculptures in a modern style characterized by mask-like faces and elongation of form. He died in Paris of tubercular meningitis, exacerbated by poverty, overwork, and addiction to alcohol and narcotics.

What did the old man say to the young man? Nothing, the old man was dead.

if dave has 50 candy bars and eats 45 what does he have? diabeties.

What do you get if you mix razor blades with babies? An erection.

What is yellow, has wheels, and lays on it's back? A school bus after a traffic accident

Cum on guys, gay jokes arent funny!

Q: What do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

an islamic man with a strange bag walk into thr airport. he is probably heading toward his flight like any other person.

Then help me understand Nero, people had the free and legal right to decide to be a part of our, or your society if you prefer, where has that option gone now? Where is the people that choose to believe in their own potential and in the one of their equals? Today we live in a society where its basically pop culture to dislike oneself, where it is considered narcissism to like oneself, and you know that we have both been affected, while those we considered allies before, have joined the same people that branded us evil.

A guy says to a palm reader "You look like you've seen a ghost. Palm reader replies "You've got cum on your hand."

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he's not gonna come

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

Whats red and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket Whats blue and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

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What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

A: Knock Knock (pause) B: Please use the doorbell, it is very late and I like to be considerate of my neighbors

How is an elephant like a grape? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

Q. What do you call a dog thats deaf? A. A horribly abused domesticated animal that needs a kinder owner.

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they have an in depth understanding of astrophysics and interstellar travel.

A rooster lays an egg on the tip of a roof. Which side does it fall to? Roosters don't lay eggs

Why did the gambling addict go into the casino? To use the bathroom

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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