What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

What did the brick say to the wall? Nothing, as they are both inanimate objects that lack knowledge and the sense to speak.

What's the difference between a fat person and a whale? The quality of the fat. -Japan

heads up!

Q.What does chuck norris eat as breakfast? ans.FOOD

Q. Why did the boy get so fat? A. From playing Pokemon Pearl Edition

What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender say, "Sorry, we don't serve your kind here." The man continues to order a drink when he realises the comment was directed at the elephant standind behind him.

I hate when Harry Potter showers in my Potatoes....

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

A black man walks into a store. As he leaves, the detector goes off. It turns out the sales clerk had forgotten to take out one of the tags on his purchase. The sales clerk promptly took it off, and the man left to enjoy the rest of his day.

Who ya gonna call? ... Whoever you need to talk to at the current time.

what do you call a woman who has sex for money? smart.

why did the baby die? It was born with cancer

There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They were driving with a gorilla when suddenly the car crashed. All the women died but only the gorilla survived. The police investigated with the gorilla and did some simple sign language. The police, using hand motions, asked the gorilla what each individual female was doing before the car crashed. The gorilla ran away for reasons unknown.

How many blondes did it take to screw in the lightbulb? Just one. She did a fine job.

Knock knock! Whos there? Me. Now open the door.

What is rainbow-colored, makes no sounds, and smells like a banana? A rainbow-colored banana

Why did the cow cross the road? He probably saw a delicious looking patch of grass on the otherside.

2 guys walk into a bar the third one ducked then proceeded homeward where he murdered his whole family by ax

I love boobs

What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

Why did the boy who didn't do his homework fall out off a tree? Because his overly obsessive mom threw a rock at him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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