Rubies are red Some diamonds are blue I have candy so get in my car

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Q: what are very funny A: Jokes

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The President, the Pope, and a small child are in a plane when the pilot announces that they are about to crash. The plane hits the ocean. They quickly remember that there is a life jacket under their seats and they promptly put it on, but wait to inflate it (by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs) it until after exiting the cabin.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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Why don't cannibals eat clowns? Clowns do not populate the area in which cannibals reside

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your momma is so stupid she failed math class

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how do you keep a bunch of black kids from jumping on the bed? your real firm with them and tell them someone may hurt themselves if they don't stop with the horseplay..

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What's funnier than slapping a girl? Calling the cops on the person who slapped her.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

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Boxing on Boxing Day

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A women go hit by a car, what everyone woners though, how did the car get in between the bedroom and the kitchen?

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What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

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That awkward moment when you thought this joke was going to be good but you thought wrong. Keep looking for good jokes.

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Josh Brown loved coressing his mums doodle at night.

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Why did the little girl cross the road??? To get away from the strange man

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what do you call a mexican being baptized? a mexican becoming christian.

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What's the difference between Jesus and a painting? It only takes one nail to hang up a painting.

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Why dont blind people go skydiving? Because they dont live when they hit the ground

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What happened to the guy who took more lineage then he should have? He went to sleep.

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Q: How do you make a cat bark? A: Douse it in gasoline and throw it in a fire.........WOOF!!!!

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how many jews does it take for me to be able to have sex with my cousin's girlfriend? idk, but that's how many I need. actually let me have some extras. couldn't hurt.

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Q: How do you make a clown stop laughing? A: Hit it in the face with an axe

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Ring. Ring. Hello? Hey, It's Sean Oh hi! How are you?

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Everybody love food when they are hungry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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