A Horse walks into a bar. Bartender:why the long face? Horse:I have terminal cancer.

Whats worse than finding an worm in your apple? 1942 BERLIN

q; whats small and high pitched a; rory johnston

Netflix and chill

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

Why did the fish bite the house? Because he wanted to eat the house

What do you call a banana? A banana.

Q: Why didnt the irishman walk out of the bar? A: He died of severe alchoholism and had a heart attack and died istantly

2 brothers were arguing, both had anger problems to the point where one started war with the other. Boy1: I HATE YOU Boy2: MOM HATES YOU Boy1: ....Wait why? Boy2: YOU WERE AN ACCIDENT SHE TRIED TO SELL YOU TO A MEXICAN AND HE SAID THAT THING WAY TOO DAM UGLEH ITD BURN THE FACES OFF MY COWS.

Q:how do you save a black guy from drowning A: you shoot him

What is the difference between a black man and a white man? The pigment in their skin.

What's room temperature and tastes like ice cream? Melted ice cream

Why is my grandpa always so grumpy? Because he has diabetes and life is very difficult for him.

Get in the van

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one.

P1 : Yo mamma's so fat... P2: My moms dead

What do you call a former pope. Dead!

what do you get if you cross the mafia and the yakuza? a hefty bounty on your head

He was as tall as a 6 foot 3 tree.

A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

Knock, Knock Who's there? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith

A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar. It's an average bar. However these men don't drink. The priest ordered some onion rings, the minister fries and the rabbi poutine. They're good friends despite their different religious views.

Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To retrieve his dead relatives in the middle of the street.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...