why did the man have an axe in his car he kills children with it

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What's white and sticky? Glue.

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WITH YOUR RED THUMBS COMBINED! I AM CAPTAIN MORAL! You: GOOOOO (AWAY) MORAL! CAPTAIN MORAL MAN, IS A HERO, GONNA TAKE GREEN THUMBS RIGHT BACK TO ZERO... Moral: Okay that is all I remember about the Captain Planet Theme song... GIVE ME RED THUMBS MUAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA! PS: Redhead, three months have passed (more or less) I wont call you because we agreed you would get of this fucking place, but I can visit you if you are a good little girl! And yeah I am calling you Red, Tifa just reminds me of Final Fantasy and your big bosoms so yeaaaaah get your little red haired cunt over here so we can chat yes?

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What is a black person's favorite food? It varies from person to person, just as with any race.

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Whats funnier than 24? 25

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You just glass her.

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An Italian, a Mexican, and an American are sharing a meal on the Titanic. They all died for the women and children first.

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What do you call a 5000 pound gorilla? Obese - gorillas should weigh around 400 pounds.

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What do you call a man with a limp? A limping man.

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Please don't tell anybody about me, or I will be hunted down, taken from my family, and be objected to a life of cruel exploitation.

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What did the zebra say to the giraffe? Nothing, they can't talk dipshit.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. You are under arrest for sodomy.

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Three penguins are at the top of snowy hill. The first penguin slides down the hill, and yells "RADIO!" The second penguin slides down the hill, and yells "RADIO!" Finally, the third penguin slides down and hill and yells "RADIO!"

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whats worse than getting raped by your mom getrting raped by a giant scorpian

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What do you call a newborn son? The proudest moment of your life. What do you call a newborn daughter? A disappointment.

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I'd rather kill myself than commit suicide.

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whats the difference from a jew and a christian the jew got arrested for rape

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what is pink and fluffly? pink fluff

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How come grilled cheese?

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Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

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What's the fastest animal on earth? An Ethiopian chicken.

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How did Ronald McDonald die? He was hit by a big mac

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Guess what! What? huhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhuhu

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Why did the beautiful girl get the job over the not so beautiful looking girl She was more qualified

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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