How do you stop a rhino from charging? An ak-47

WANNA HERE A JOKE? (no, i purposely clicked in this joke website to simply here to fulfill my demonic internet pleasures.)

Why did the black man die? He drove off a cliff.

Straight men can be bronies.

Why doesn't Gary like me? Because I killed his family and fed them to him.

Why did the little boy stop looking for his ball? Because he found it.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimers, Bus....

Q: knock knock who is there A;dunno go check

A blind man walks into the girls bathroom.

What's the difference between erotica and kink? Erotica involves simple arousal; kink usually has an added element of masochism.

What do you call a black guy riding a unicycle? A black guy riding a unicycle.

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

Once upon a time there was a magical duck in a magical kingdom. Nothing interesting ever happened to it and it was eaten by a magical fox.

Peas

A Chinese man walks into a bar. With his thick accent, he finds it difficult to order drinks.

How can you tell if your blind date is going to be good looking? Go on the date and see if they're good looking.

A bar walks into a man. The drink orders a bartender. And then the money walks home. End The.

how do you get lady gaga to wake up in the morning? Hit her with a brick

A chicken rode into town on a horse named Friday. He was later shot by a dyslexic Russian dinosaur.

Why did the fat guy survive the the plane crash? He was late to get up due to a malfunctioning alarm clock and so missed his flight, sparing him of the tragic outcome the other passengers suffered. To this day he still thinks about how a completely random occurrence saved his life.

Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

How do you kill Chuck Norris? Short Answer: You can't.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Whats blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz. Whats pink and fuzzy? Blue fuzz that's embarrassed.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...