your moms my other ride

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What do you do when you see an ostrich playing tennis? I don't know as I have little experience in the areas of ostriches or tennis. Frankly, I'm not quite sure why you're even asking me

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Yeah its just my way of saying that I appreciate you worrying so much about me, you are a sweet girl, Honestly I do not understand why the hell you guys are using Horsehead AntiJoke out of all places, there are far more terrible forgettable sites available, I mean this sites connection suddenly went from disgustingly terrible to fine and dandy, the Feds, the Interpol and even fucking Al Qaeda might be reading every single message, but there is no way in hell anyone can decipher the code format, if they could, they would have done it when I invented it sixteen years ago, Myself mind you, nothing subtle about me today apparently.

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What is the worst part about being a blonde? Random green painted strangers throw forks at you claiming it will confuse you, because they got it off of an anti joke website!

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roses are red violets are blue most poems rhyme but this one doesnt

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What does the color 9 smell like? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like lead, I did a poo.

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Your future.

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Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are green I'm bipolar

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guess what chicken butt

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: Banana! B: Not you again..(slams door)

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Why do Jew's have long noses? To dig out of the ashes.

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Roses are red Violets are blue So is your face Cuz I just gagged you

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What's worse than the holocaust? An open-minded black man.

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What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

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ROB SNIEDER ISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS A CAARRRRROT! rated pg-13

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What starts with f and end in uck Firetruck

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A green-painted man walked into a bar and confused a blonde, bar-tending horse with a tale of rape in the holocaust involving an amputee child riding a fridge on a plane with a pig, a duck, a chicken, a lawyer and countless men of various ethnicities, religious faiths and sexual persuasions. Together, they changed a lightbulb, ate wormy apples and agreed upon the colour of roses and violets respectively.

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Nero, I can barely stay awake, can we chat more later today though? I would really enjoy that, and sleep before that.

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Noobz -wondering why your valid anti-joke is getting voted down? Simply because it's a repeat, someone else has already submitted it. Only the original is valid for positive to votes. The regulars on here willallvote a repeat down immediately. I have 3 accounts set upwith different IP's just to do that. You have been warned. Search first mo fo's

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What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

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What's brown and adhesive? A stick

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whats my name? Matt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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