what is the best thing to do if you are stuck in a cave with ten lions that haven't eaten in ten years? well the lions aren't the thing to worry about because if they have not eaten in ten years then they would have starved to death

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Dear Chase. You are retarded Your jokes suck Violets are red jump off a bridge

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What do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? Take the pin out and throw it back. Then look down and realize there's still an active grenade in your hand. You've just become the joke

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What's the difference between camping and molestation? I wasn't taken camping as a child

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork. Whats better than catching a baby with a pitchfork? Eating it afterwords.

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You know what's addicting? Heroine.

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1: Knock, knock 2: Go away!

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what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

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What's worse than a tornado that kills your whole whole family? Nothing.

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So horse walk into a bar. The barkeep says "Look horse. You cant be in Here. You're too big and you're going to hurt someone....Its just not gonna work out."

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Knock knock. Who is there? My wife. My wife who? My wife is a prostitute, selling her own body for money so we can afford drugs for my son who has cancer.

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What do you call a secret agent that lives in a bottle of washing up liquid? Bubble-0-7

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Why did the police officer arrest the baseball player? He raped and murdered a thirteen year old girl.

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why did the kid get chemotherapy? because he had cancer

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Gotta disappoint you there, you see there are hundreds, perhaps thousands of similar organizations which work for the government, and those I work for are black ops, meaning that I would be putting my life in danger if I told you anything about it besides that fact. Its not listed anywhere, its not FBI, its not legislated by any government yet many governments invest their funds there, you could call it something like the interpool, and something like the underground society, except its multi-government driven... A term I sincerely do not fully understand myself, I have certain talents I put to use, but I lack the education in order to be more than a employee for these people.

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Why was the little boy nervous about playing with the little girl? Because she had gonorrhea.

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What do babies and caterpillars have in common? They're both dead. Except the caterpillar.

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*knock knock* Who's there? ...Who's there?... *opens door to find a dead baby on the front door step*

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What did one dog say to the other dog? Nobody knows as humans are unable to understand the way dogs communicate.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks. The rest of the bar patrons are thoroughly confused.

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'Knock knock' 'who's there?' 'Whinny the poo' 'Whinny the poo who?' 'Whinny the poo'

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Q: Why did the girl fall off the swing? R: Because she had no arms.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Presents

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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