If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

Do dead Elves know it's Xmas ?

What dosent kill you only makes you injured

Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me!

Miranda Lorenz is a WHORE!!! She has slept with three guys while in a relationship!! then when he broke up with her for cheating on him, she keyed his car!! Psycho Bitch!!!

Rebecca Black walks into a bar and gets shot.

Q:If an apple and an orange had a politicial debate, what would it concern? A:Nothing important.

So a seal walks into a club...

Why was the boy crying? Because he was told he would never find a wife

yo mama's so fat, she wears a big belt

what shoes do pedafiles wear White vans

Q: Why didn't Jack go up the hill? A: He had prior engagements.

what did the African baby get for his birthday?..... AIDS

Why did the Kitty stop meowing? Because its dead.

Why did Sally Drop here ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock Knock? *who's there* Not Sally.

Dont listen to your heart all it dose is BEAT BEAT BEAT

What did the the man, the dog, and the psychiatrist talk about? The man's childhood experience losing his pet as a contributer to his symptoms of psychosis.

What did the podiatrist say to the proctologist? That athletes foot fungus is clearing up nicely.

What did the blind man say to his wife? Nothing, for he was mute too

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Get out".

What happened to the Asian who ran into the wall with a boner? He ejaculated his sperm, impregnating the wall. The wall went to the authorities, and the man was charged with rape. He is now serving a 10 year prison sentence, with no possibility of parole.

Person 1 - Have you heard about the movie about constipation? Person 2 - No. Person 1 - It hasn't come out yet

roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

What do you you call a mexican that jumped the border? successful

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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