Q: Knock - Knock A: NO SOLICITORS!

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies? The one at the bottom is alive. What's worse than that? He's eating his way out. What's worse than that? He came back for seconds.

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Study from real life: My trip to Texas. (From the time when I was interested in mormon-ism.) Texan: And here is my gun collection, great for shootin yer Mexican scum. Me: Uh I am Norwegian but my ancestors where Russian or something so my skin is... Texan: *points gun at me and pushes trigger halfways* Just kidding der son, sure you aint no Mexican though? Okay just checkin ya know... Me *sweating bullets* Texan guys gun go off almost hitting me and breaking a vase.. Conclusion: He blamed me, everyone had lunch outside later, everyone kept looking at the "trigger happy MEXICAN"... Nero: By then I began grasping the fact that I was better suited for the study of the dark arts... And also learned that in Mormonism, Heaven and Hell are planets locked into war, where black people where neutral, and red people are demon supporters, but WE CAN ALL BE SAVED BY BECOMING WHITE! JUST LIKE THE ANGEL MORONI! Conclusion two: Moroni... Lol.

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where did you get those clothes? at the toilet store.

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Unnnnnnnn

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how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

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A circus clown riding the cutest miniture Shetland pony both fall over a cliff and die.

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Look down at your keyboard. Notice that U and I are together? <3 Also notice that J and K are together too!:P

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have multiple personality disorder And so do we

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What do you call an giraffe? Well, you should probably call it a giraffe if you want people to think you are literate and know your grammar.

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A man stuck his diick in a blender He had a "penis shake" for breakfast

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Jimmy said he would never beat his wife, so why did he do it anyway? Because he was a hypocrite.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, that was a turkey. Oh.

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whats the capital of congo famine

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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The verification for this post was debatable: "Which of these does not belong?" George Bush Barack Obama Bill Clinton Ronald Reagan Head of Cabbage Answers on a postcard please... [L]

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I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!!! LOUD NOISES!!!

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How do you get your sister to stop wearing your underwear? Throw up on her.

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Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

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How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

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What was the worst part when 3 Mexican men fell off a cliff? They each were active in the community and had jobs.

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What is spiky and opens up wide? The Mouth…what were you thinking you perv?

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What has two legs and two arms? A Human

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Q: What was the name of the armless elf in Snow White? A: Stumpy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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