Q: What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A:One is fun to hit with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you make a baby cry Throw a brick at its face

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Q: Whats black white and red all over? A: A dead penguin

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is pink and smells like red paint? Pink paint

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A stand-up comedian quits his job. He has social anxiety and can't stand the pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Nah, could not care less about how I sound on "The network", its just that I spent all night finishing the core concept to my new novel, and all the capital letters and stuff sound like Jim Carrey in my head as I type. So Redcunt, where you going? When you coming back?

thumb_up thumb_down -28

It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you know when a Mexican has died? Well based on the large mass of people inside and outside the funeral home who mostly seem to be of a mexican background and cultue, it would be safe to say that those are his/her friends and family who care deeply about them and therefore you could conclude that a Mexican person probably passed away. It's actually quite sad and going to be a rough few days for those closely connected to the person who died.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Your mother is so fat, that recent test results have proved she is morbidly obese.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

sadf

thumb_up thumb_down -23

I am awesome, you are not, i am awesome, you smoke pot!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the girl run to school Because a lion was chasing her

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" he shouted after he stubbed his toe on a table.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock. Who's There? Oh wait! i don't care!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why didn't the boy eat his vegetables? he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +13

69

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the squirrel say to the dog? "I have AIDS."

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you do to get someone to shut up? You hit with a brick

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A man walks in to a bar, remembering he was actually going to the hardware store, he heads out and leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what do you call a disabled black man getting beat up? an unfortunate human

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Your momma's so fat, she died on the operating table during her bypass surgery.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Have you ever had Ethiopian food before? No? Well neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are red, Violets are blue. False. Violets are violet

thumb_up thumb_down +11

You know what happens when you assume. You jump to a conclusion that could conceivably have severe consequences.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops