What's the difference between Harry Potter and the Jews? Harry Potter can escape the chambers.

Why did OJ SImpson never get convicted of murder? Because after going to court and proving his innocence a jury of twelve people found him not guilty.

why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

Wife: Do you know what the most untruthful lie I've told you? Husband: What? Wife: That I love you. By the way I'm leaving you for your father. The twins are gay and in love with each other and your daughter is a hooker with AIDS. Your mother killed herself upon hearing all this news. She suffered a lot. Oh, the dog died by rat poisoning that your dad put in the backyard. Bye.

What's the difference between an orange? A bycicle you fool, a vest doens't have sleeves

yo mama so fat, she wheres glasses to see better!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the city on the other side. He hoped he could find work in one of the city's cheap factories. He needed money for his family: he could not bear to see them slowly starve for any longer. If he could get a lowly-paid job he may be able to just sustain them. But he knew it could not last for long. He would probably die on the streets or in the slums, cold, lonely and starving. But it was a risk worth taking - he could not see his own family waste slowly away like so many of his friends had.

A blonde girl walks into the local dry cleaners. She places a garment on the counter. "I'll be back tomorrow afternoon to pick up my dress." she says. "Come again?" says the clerk, cupping his ear. "I said 'I'LL BE BACK TOMORROW AFTERNOON TO PICK UP MY DRESS'," says the girl, this time louder.

What do you call two black people on one bike? Unsafe. Regular bicycles are typically not suited for use by two people at once, black or otherwise. Riding on the handlebars is dangerous and can lead to serious injury.

what did the left foot say to the right foot? Nothing, feet don't talk

why are elephants gray? to tell them apart from blueberries.

How many people does it take to make a fun party? Idk, that's why I asked you, you see I'm throwing a party and wantedto know how many people I should invite.

Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

Why did the little girl drop her teddy bear? Because she was being sexually molested. Why did the little Jewish girl drop her teddy bear? Because gas came out of the shower-head.

Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

One day, John ate some food. He quickly realized he had an upsetting feeling in his stomach, so he stopped eating food and used the restroom. Then he drew a picture.

Writing is hard Poems are strong I am muslim And this is a bomb.

How do you know it's a Mexican's birthday? They bring cupcakes to school for your entire class to enjoy.

-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

One day a mans computer was unusually, when all else failed, he had to go to extreme measures. He then refreshed his page.

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping that at least one of the puns would win. Unfortunately, none of them did.

Yo mama is so fat she could be a plus size model because she's big and hot.

I've always hated people saying "last one there is a rotten egg" because don't you want to be a rotten egg so you don't get eaten?

Where do five gay guys walk? Where ever they choose to. this is a free country, where people are free to travel as they please, despite what their sexual orientation may be. Jerk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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