What do you catch a baby with? A pitchfork

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a father listens to his son while he was on the computer. he heard "BABBY BABBY OHHHHH" and busted in He was releaved to find him masterbating to porn because he thought it was Justin Beiber

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What did one umbrella say to the other umbrella? Nothing, umbrellas cannot instigate a conversation, because they cannot talk.

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Why did the plain crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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yo mama is so dumb, she got all Fs on her report

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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What do Ethiopian children do at night? Starve

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what did the special ed kid get on his iq test? drool

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What did the man say to the other man? Hi

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Q: is this the krusty krab? A: No this is patrick!

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Why was the boy sad? Because his mother and father had just disowned him.

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roses are red violets are blue, every 1 looks at you and call u a fool

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What do you call a man who leaves his wife and kids to be with another woman? A dick.

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Q: what do you call a guy named Aaron? A: Aaron

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Why did the road cross the chicken? The 2 nouns in the sentence has been switched.

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What's worse than discovering that you have contracted HIV? Stumbling upon a mass genocide. HIV's pretty bad though.

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Why does your mom moan and scream at night? She had a rough childhood, filled with all types of despair and disappointment.

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What did one tree say to the other? "Hey Phil, how's it going?

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Q: What did the psychopath dream about? A: An insane chimpanzee kicking his head off, or maybe something normal

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A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street when they see an orphanage on fire. "Oh my god!" says the rabbi. "We have to save the children!" "Screw the children!" says the priest. "Out of what?" replies the rabbi.

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I hear Lebron has a new phone. He has it on silent all the time. It's because he doesn't want to disturb anyone around him while they prepare for important games in which he will be an indispensable part of, especially during the 4th quarters of the NBA Finals.

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Three Black men smash windows to enter a house. They're firemen and are rescuing a young child...

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Why did the frog fall out the tree it was dead. Why did the second frog fall out the tree it was stapled to the first frog. Why did the third frog fall from to the tree peer pressure. Why did the fourth frog fall from the tree the third frog was his son. Why did the fifth frog fall from the tree he thought it was a game. Why did the sixth frog fall from the tree he shared the same body with the fifth frog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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