How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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What do you call a dragon with no wings? a dragon with no wings :(

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why did the parakeet eat the cracker? because it wanted to.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Pussy... Do you get it? Think about what you just answered.

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A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

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The snake rides the bicycle in the forest, the rabbit sees this, and says "hey snake, you don't have legs" "oh damn" replies the snake and eats the rabbit because of the insolence

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What do you say if you see your TV floating in the middle of the night? Wow, I need to lighten up on the acid.

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why did the chicken cross the road? why should a chickens motives be questioned

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A person was born on may 5th 1955 and one day noticed that they had $555.55 in their bank account. The person went to a race and betted all their money on the 5th runner in the 5th race. What happened? The runner came in 5th place.

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Roses are OK, Violets do the trick, C'mon and let me whip out my Dick.

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Haulocaust Whats worse that the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

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How are eagles and jellyfish the same? They both fly but jellyfish don't.

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Why was jimmy crying? He had a frog stapled to his face

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knock,knock who's there? the postman didn't answer as he is deaf

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

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Why did nick and tyler visit anti-joke.com? Because they have nothing better to do.

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whats blue, saggy, moldy and smelly? Will Nealis' Vagina

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So you're flying around in your bathtub, how pancakes to shingle a doghouse? Airhockey, because pizza bagels can't cry.

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knock knock "who's there?" "boo" "boo who?" dont worry its only a joke dont cry.

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Yo mamma is so nice, when she bakes a batch of cookies, there's enough for everybody.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

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Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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