doctor doctor i have been having a sore head recently . doctor : have you hurt your head yes

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What did the clinically depressed man get for Christmas? He received many of splendid gifts and a joyous day with his family. He realized that his life isn't so bad after all, and went home with his head held high. He was then eaten by a vicious looking 7.

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Why didn't the man have a vagina? Trick Question. Everybody has a vagina.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

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Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

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Homosexual babies? It's a choice

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Found out my dad was gay the other day. Now I have to take him to dance clubs, take him to musicals and find the man who gave birth to me.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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When black people wore their pants low, white people called it "Saggin" little did they know that "saggin" spelled backwards is "white supremacy" those sneaky white people

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What did Bill go for his birthday? No where someone slashed his tires.

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Why couldn't he play piano? Because he is an untalented piece of shit.

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? Because he had no arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Johnny was a potato.

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What happened to the Californian who drove off into the sunset. He died. You can't drive in the ocean.

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What has 4 eyes and cant see? Mississippi

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69

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Why did the girl scream? She was being raped.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house red. Babies, especially dead ones cannot paint.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Did you know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes

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Knock knock. Who's there? President. President who? The President of the United States.

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A blonde walks into a bar. She is rushed to the hospital and treated for a broken nose and a busted lip. She now has a deformed nose.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead. Q: Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? A: Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Btw I have aids And now you too

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? Nothing. They don't live on the same continent.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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