Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did Michael Vick run? Because he was being chased by defenders.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I did your mom-A FAVOR-by making you-A SANDWICH-my favorite part was when she stripped-THE LETTUCE-then i touched her boob-OO-then we fucked

thumb_up thumb_down -14

your face

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the baby cross the road? Because ti was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock knock no answer, as the tenant of the house was out shopping.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

A man. That is all.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

E M I L Y L Y N C H B I L L I E J E A N L A R K I N YEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Two blondes are out for a walk when they come across some tracks, they realise they are train tracks and move out of the way to make sure they aren't hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Remember when the whole country was sad because Marget Thatcher died? No, me neither.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Yo mama's so fat she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock Knock Whos there? Your mom My mom died three years ago, please go away while i cry.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Knock knock It's open, come in

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the white guy say to the two black guys? I like oreos.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are red Violets are blue I like you Get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Find the b dddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A duck walks into a bar Its theoretical comical universe implodes from the destructive weight of inevitable punchlines and everyone in the bar dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the chicken cross the road? There is no possible way for humans and chickens to communicate with each other. Therefore we cannot know.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga? one of them is a women the other one is not.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

what do u call a Muslim flying a plane??? 9-11

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats 9 plus 10? 19

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What is a black, yellow like liquid that contains carbon dioxide, usually kept in a can, and is not coke? Pepsi.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What happened to the homeless man at midnight? He took a shit on the ground

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops