a man walks into a casino, it's the third time this week and he's contemplating suicide.

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Knock knock Who's there? The mailman The mailman who? The MAILMAN The MAILMAN who? I'm the Fu*king mailman now here's your MAIL!

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How did the black kid pass his exam? He studied.

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Roses are Verbotten Violets are Verbotten Anti-jokes is Verbotten Everything is Verbotten boats aren't Verbotten

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How do you find a jew amoung italians? Through a dollar and see which one whines its not enough!

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Do you know the reason people like sleeping? It's because they have good dreams. Ooh la la.--

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How old was the baby when it took its first steps? That question is impossible to answer due to the fact the parents had an abortion and the fetus remained unborn.

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long in the tooth!

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What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd probably pay in cash.

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If you call a quiz a quizzicle, what do you call a test? A set of questions or problems used as a means of evaluating the abilities, aptitudes, skills, or performance of an individual or group.

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Women. One of the genders a human can be.

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A chicken crossed the road.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Gregory Pelnick

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Q: What is soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

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what did the fat guy say to the girl ill make fun of you because i have bigger tits than you

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When life gives you AIDS! Make lemonAIDS!

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What did the hunter say when he saw the elephants coming? Here come the elephants. What did the hunter say when he saw the elephants coming wearing a pair of sunglasses? Like wearing a pair of sunglasses as a dhitty disguise would confuse me. I took law at UCLA before becoming a professional game hunter and I've been in this business for almost 10 years. I think I know an elephant with or without sunglasses.

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A black man goes down to Alabama in the 1960s; He gets lynched.

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Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

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What did the no-arm, no-leg, paraplegic orphan with cancer get for christmas? Pregnant.

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Knock knock? Whose there? Colin Come in

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How do you stop a Polish army on horseback? With artillery.

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A bar walked into a bar. To get to the other horse.

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Why was darren too late for school today...? She got hit by the bus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops