Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I was on the other side. And I'm a chick magnet

How do you kill chuck norris? With a gun...from 40 feet away

What's worse than being the last man on earth with thousands of women to please? Realizing that you are gay and there are no men left.

What has eyes but can't see? A blind person.

What did the carrot say when he was Chopped. Auch.

Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

I'm HIV positive.

A man sat down Then he stood up

A man works at a brick factory. He is told by his boss that if he is to steal any brick from the factory, he will be sacked. But every day the man steals one brick and puts it in his lunch box to take home and is not caught. One day he has enough bricks to build a house, and he says "When I build this house there will be none left over". The house is now built and while the man is taking a look around he stubs his toe on something, he looks down to see a brick and he sighs, picks up the brick and throws it in the air. There are two pilots driving a plane, one has a dog and one has a wardrobe. One pilot says to the other "I don't particularly like dogs" then the other pilot says to him "I don't really like wardrobes". They then make an agreement and throw both the wardrobe and the dog out the window. Five minutes later one pilot looks out the window out onto the plane wing, and guess what he sees? A brick.

Wanna hear a race joke?.....whoops, ya missed it

Why does Shaun's dad beat him? Because Shaun is an asshole.

I forgot how to throw a boomerang and then it came back to me.

Q: "How does a monkey hide in a jungle?", A:"Paint its balls red and sit in a cherry tree" , Q:"What is the loudest noise in the jungle?", A: "A native picking cherries"

Knock knock Who's there? Osama Bin Laden

I don't find blind jokes funny. Honestly, I just can't see the humor in them.

there was a black man his head looked like a peanut

Q How do you make the fire fighter sad? A Kill his dog

How do you stop a black man from drowning? Take away his glass of water.

why did the kid get in trouble. Because he put this up in typing class -charles hall aka chuckles

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? It doesn't matter, the only chuck that matters is Chuck Norris.

Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Obviously not Bob, Idiot What did Bob get for christmas? A glove Actually, I lie. He hasn't unboxed it yet.

As if it helps your self esteem: Nothing yet, Be the first to comment.

Hello, I'm Mark and I have multiple-personality disorder. Don't listen to him, no he doesn't.

why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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