one day there was an ugly barnicle. he was SSSOOO ugly that everyone died the end -patrick

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, You Have A Face That Belongs At The Zoo, Don't Worry I'll Be There With You, Not In The Cage But Laughing At You!!! :D

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What do you call an old lady walking down the street? Widowed.

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Gary: Hey Bill, wanna hear a joke? Bill: Yes Gary: Okay.

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What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

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Three bitches walk into a bar, and die

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Your mother is so fat that people make rude comments about her behind her back, but they shouldn't because she's a really nice lady.

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Want to hear a joke? So do I.

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Q: Why was the little boy upset? A: His nose was glued to the sidewalk.

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Any idea of his whereabouts Nero? I am the leader, I fund this myself, as you know money is not my problem, its rather loyalty.

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A man walks into a bar. It was his push-up bar that he didn't install high enough. He bumps his head and it hurts.

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How do you scare a Jew Hold your lighter up and blow out the flame and I've toward him real slowly and see how much drama he'll cause

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What makes you hate life and feel good at the same time? A rapist.

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What did one snowman say to the other? Hmm...smells like carrots.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a fetish for sniffing your shoes.

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what happened to your carpool? they died.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A bike.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting stabbed.

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Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

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"HEY DUMB FU** THIS STUFF IS SUPPOSED TO BE FUNNY!!!" SAID SIMON COWELL!!!

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What did the plane say to the twin towers on 9/11 - Nothing, how do you expect planes to talk, stop hallucinating and stop with the drugs

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What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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I read the terms of service.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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