Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock... Who's there? Not Suzy.

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A man goes to the doctor and is told, "you have cancer." He then spends his last days writing a bucket list, but losing his leg in a wood chipper before he could complete a single item on his list

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Once upon a time there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end.

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Your mom is so ugly that she had self-esteem problems and severe depression as a teenager due to merciless bullying due to her looks, however she overcame this, found a man who loved her for who she was, and then married him. She now lives a happy life.

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Knock knock Who's there? The Land Lord The Land Lord who? I am here to evict you.

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Q. How did the man with no legs get to places? A. He didn't, he died at his house alone

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A man walks into a barbershop. He gets a crew cut and leaves.

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Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

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What's grey and can't climb trees? A parking lot.

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The police, we have several warrants for your arrest.

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A fat mexican man runs a marathon. Later, he is hit by a bus and raped by a squirrel.

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What time is it when a cow walks into your house? The time that your mother arives.

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What did the catholic priest do to the little boy in the Confessions Took his confessions

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knock knock 'who's there?' 'just open the door'

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roses are red violets are blue oranges are......

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Why didn't the Irishman walk into the bar? Beacause he had killed himself the previous night as a result of his alcoholism.

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What's the difference between a red door and a blue door? Fat black people.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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Jonny runs with scissors. He gets hit by a bus.

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i was molested.

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police. Your father's been taken to county jail for his third DUI.

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I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

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Why shouldn't 6 guys sleep naked in the same bed? They would not fit

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I've got a dig bick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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