What did the stop sign say to the no smoking sign? Stop

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Why Do Girls Have holes?? For the guys poles.

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A: Knock Knock B: Who's there? A: The Police. We have a warrant for your arrest.

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How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail it to the ground

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? -- Because it was dead Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -- Because it was stapled to the squirrel

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is a rapist.

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what's the difference between a pogo stick and a traffic cone? well for starters, traffic a cones main function is to cordon off areas or alert drivers to certain areas of road that are not to be breached and pogo sticks are used as toys to heighten bouncing. I'll stop here but the list goes on.

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Woman are equal and deserve respect just kidding they should suck my ****

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Yo mama is so fat she has a gym membership and a diet plan to lose weight

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what's black? a lot of things.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

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How types of people are there? One, we are the only homo sapiens.

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

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What did the mute girl say to the other mute girl?

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I've got a joke for you. The people writing these jokes. Thats a joke.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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i don't hate you because your fat ...your fat because i hate you

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Q: how many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: two, one to hold the ladder securely and the other to screw in the lightbulb.

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What did Justin Bieber say when he lost his tampon? Where's my tampon?

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why did the clown cross the road? to kill everyone in the dark knight midnight premiere

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Is that a baby in your carriage or are you just happ..... WTF. WHERES ITS EYES!? **purges**

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Women's Rights

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What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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