Why don't women wear watches? In the technological age we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

Your moma's so fat, she has a considerable list of medical health problems, and she is very miserable.

What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

What happened to the man who dropped his soap? Nothing he picked it up and lived a happy life.

A man asked a friend at work if he could have $100, his friend replied "sure I'll give it to you when pigs fly", that man never received $100 dollars from his friend.

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

What did red say to yellow? Move over orange is coming now.

Q: What did the forgetful person say to the other? A:

Yo mama is so fat that she has to buy plus size clothes because small size clothes would be inappropriate for her to wear.

If a picture is worth a thousand words, what is a video worth?

why was the man denied his teaching job? because he is a wanted cerial killer in 43 states.

Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird

Come over here boy and have a cigar, you're gonna go far. Congratulations on being the first human cannonball, please use the cigar to light the fuse. Happy landings.

A man drives home from a bar one night, He is under the influence and his reckless driving will costs many innocent people their lives.

It takes a minute to know somebody, an hour to fall in love, but a lifetime to forget. Once, my mom forgot me at Disney World.

There's a football player who walks into a bar and sees a gay guy. The gay guy says, "So you're a football player, right?" The football player says, "Yes." The gay guy says, "I have a game of football myself. It's called fart football. It's where you drink a mug of beer in less than five seconds and then you drop your pants and fart for the extra point." The gay guy goes first. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds and farts. The football player goes. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds then he drops his pants and before he farts, the gay guy says, "BLOCK THAT KICK! BLOCK THAT KICK!"

A black man, an Asian man, and a Mexican man jump off a bridge. They were all suffering from chronic depression and couldn't take the pressures of life anymore.

When Josh moran was born he was thrown up in the air three times and was caught twice.

What did the black guy say after coming home from school? "I just got home from school."

Roses are gray. Violets are gray. I am a dog.

Why did the chicken cross the road? A chicken doesn't need a motive to cross a road, it just does.

Why did the dinosaurs become extinct? Because they wanted to.

FOX News: Fair and balanced

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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