Guess what? I like trains.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, purple is a color, I like grilled cheese

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Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

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How many are in a baker's dozen? 12 bakers

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Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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Knock knock Who's there? Hi I'm John from the jehovah witness society down the street and I'd love to talk to you about your beliefs! Would you like a pamphlet?

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? You don't call it anything. You don't drive a plane you fly it.

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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Yo momma so hot she won a beauty contest and was later shot and killed by the jealous losers

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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how how does a black man jump. the same way anyone else does

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Lacrosse is the best sport in the world

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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why are black people so good at sports? hard work and dedication

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"Hheheheh Hey Butthead"- "Were Gonna Score!"

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Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

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What do the Irish do on their birthdays? Eat birthday cake and sing happy birthday

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What is brown and smells? Poop

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How do you put 4 elephants inside a Volkswagen? You'd have to the change the interior design of the car and probably cut most of the roof. How do you put a Giraffe inside a Volkswagen? You ask her nicely to squeeze in between the four elephants...

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Q: Why was the blonde in a black car? A: Becasue the car was a herse and she was killed a week before in an accident where the other driver was drunk Becasue his wife had left him with no money and no kids to come home to.

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What's white, black and can't fly? Nothing important.

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Why did the cops beat up rodney king? Resisting arrest.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops