why did the geman man hit the jewish man? because the jewish man swung a punch at the german man so it was an act of self defense.

I have alzheimers and one day me and my nephew were............................

Mohamed is driving a taxi to the airport at 20mph How many pounds of explosives are strapped to his chest?

There were once two horses names Bill and Ed who lived on a farm. Every day Bill and Ed would race from the old barn past the broken tractor to the tall oak tree. Bill was very fast, but Ed always beat Bill. After many months, Bill was fed up. "I've had it with you!" he shouted to Ed. "I won't race with you anymore." Ed was very sad. He liked racing very much. The next day, Ed asked Bill, "Hey Bill, come race with me to the tall oak tree!" But Bill said, "No, you'll just beat me. I won't race with you." Ed thought for a moment, then said, "Fine, I'll let you start 5 meters in front of me." Bill pondered the proposition. Finally, he agreed. They started at the old barn, with Bill 5 meters in front of Ed. They both started running at the same time. As they passed the broken truck, Bill was happy to see that he was beating Ed. But at the last second, Ed sprinted forwards and beat Bill. "Ed!" shouted Bill, exasperated. "I can't believe you beat me! I'm never racing you again." But the next day, Ed asked Bill to race again. "This time, you can start 15 meters in front of me." Bill pondered the proposition, then finally agreed. 15 meters was a long way to catch up. They began to race. Bill was winning, but at the last second, Ed caught up and beat him. "Ed! I can't believe you beat me! I will never race you again," said Bill. But the next day, Ed asked Bill to race him again. "No way!" said Bill. "This time, I'll let you start at the broken truck," offered Ed. Bill thought for a moment. The truck was very close to the old oak tree, there was no way Ed could beat him. So he agreed. They began to race again. Bill was winning, but at the last second, Ed beat him again. "That's it!" shouted Bill. "I will never, ever race with you again!" But the next day Ed asked Bill again to race him. "This time, you can start 10 meters from the oak tree." Bill thought about it. There was no way Ed could beat him if he started 10 meters from the finish line. But his thoughts were interrupted by the dog running over. He said, "Bill! Don't race him, he will surely beat you!" Bill was silent for a moment. He looked at the dog, then to Ed. Then back to the dog. Then back to Ed. "Ed," he said perplexedly, "I didn't know dogs could talk too!"

What's the difference between a bike and a black man? I don't know how to ride a bike.

steven hawking walks into a bar just kidding he has a horrable disiese preventing him from walking

Whats better than sex? Not dying. Ha

when debbie meets downer

Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

what is the difference between two trees? it doesn't matter because motorcycles don't have doors

Knock knock Who's there? The interrupting doctor The interrupting doct... You have Cancer

Benevolent villain.

What's worse than having a friend in a car accident? Laughing at their funeral.

In soviet russia...the abundance of natural oils and rich agricultural land provide it with a thriving economy

whats worse than 4 dead monkeys? 5 dead monkeys.

Pigs have the emotional capacity of a five year old think about that next time you have to dissect one in biology

What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

Roses are red. Waffles are blue. Blue Waffle.

The street outside of my house is covered in jelly. I have done this.

Why do black people like fried chicken? There's cocaine inside.

some dude: weed is bad Other dude: then why do they prescribe it to people are you dumb or are you stupid

Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: None. Bees make honey, not milk.

your amazing just the way you are... even though you have aids.

How did the old guy die? Of death and death related symptoms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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