there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

What do you call a smart blond? A golden retriever!

i feel like i will die some heroic death, but its more likely i will trip over my dog and choke on a spoonful of frosting.

Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had terminal brain cancer.

Why did the black man go to the back of the bus? The only unoccupied seats were back there.

Why did the schizophrenic chicken cross the road? He had to go to the clinic, the poor dear.

A Black guy and a Mexican guy walk into the bar. The bar tender offers to buy them a round of drinks because he can tell they had a hard day at the office.

Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

How do you make a Muslim mad? You burn the Quran.

What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

Wanna hear a joke? Me too.

What do you call a thirsty girl? H2Hoe

Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

What is white and can't walk? A PVC Pipe.

What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas

How do you make someone to go away from you? You rape them How do you get santa to not give you presents anymore? You rape him How do you get the easter bunny to stop coming to your house? Friend: you rape him? No, you ask him politly to leave.

Two people walk into a bar, the third one ducked.

A man walks into a bar the bartender looks at the man and says "Hey son you wanna make one hundred bucks?" the man looks at the bartender and says "Im not your son."

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? "Get in the Batmobile"

Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

tim tebow is a great quarterback

What's wanted by none, wanted by one, and is worse than Terran Hansen? Brooke Colbert. Go you Jesse.

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzy.

Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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