why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

How do you make your children nice? You dont have any.

Penis

poo

Your mom is so poor; she doesn't have a job.

roses are red violets are blue i have aids and so do you happy valentines day!

Why did Jimmy get off of the park bench? he wanted candy from the man in the white van

What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

You know whats better than 24? 25

How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to file a lawsuit.

What do you call a young fortune teller who just escaped from jail? A small medium at large.

how many baby's does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

How did the baby cross the road? .......... It was stapled to the chicken.

What is large, heavy, tastes like poptarts, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A semi truck full of poptarts

Theres a man with 2 eyes.

What happened when the princess kissed the frog? She died, the frog was highly toxic.

How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? As they can't find any, they are just squirrels, they can not asist little timmy choking on the lightbulb rolling around on the floor.

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

what happened to the polish man that was running late for work he got their late apparantly

If you had to go blind, would you go blind? If you said no, then you are wrong. You had to go blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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