Did you hear the one about Steven Hawking into a bar? I havn't either, but its probably a hoot.

Why did the mechanic sleep under a car? He had narcolepsy.

A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

Why did the woman fall over? Because she had both of her arms amputated so when she lost her balance she had nothing to counter her weight going forward with an inverse motion.

So a frog and a penguin were talking and the frog says, " I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is we're freezing, but the good news is: We have a conoe!".

3 people walk into a bar. They order the same drinks. Upon receiving these drinks, they all promptly left. This is not a funny joke.

a tiger swims into the indian ocen and eats a tuna. the tiger shortly dies

How did Pikachu jump off of a 100 story building and survive? He's not real

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb. Two. But it would have to be a very big lightbulb to fit both of them in there.

what did the lesbian say to the man? I don't like penis

your mother is so lesbian

why did the man shoot himself in the foot? because he didnt have the safety on and he had no gun handling skills.

What happened when a fish rode a bike? It fell off and injured itself.

Elise's parents have four children. The first's name is April, the second's name is May, the third's name is June. What's the fourth children's name ? July. Elise is adopted, and thus does not count.

The speakers on my computer were broken, so I was going to replace them with John Boehner. Because he is the SPEAKER of the house.

whats sad about 4 black guy drivein off a cliff in a cadalic a wast of good cadalic

Guess what i realized when i became 18? I was 18

Melbourne Football Club.

how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

A fish swims into a wall. It does not say anything, seeing as fish do not possess vocal chords and therefore are incapable of speech.

What's the best part of any family reunion? Sodomy.

A Muslim walks into a bar He immediatley turns around and leaves as his religious beliefs forbid consumption of alcoholic beverages.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? The light was red, which prompted the chicken to cross safely.

Knock! Knock! Whose there? Chris Chris who? (There was never a response. Leaving the man to wonder who Chris was... Was it his high school buddy Chris? His former colleague? That guy who filled his propane tank down at the gas station? Was that guy's name even Chris-or was it Craig? Craig, it was definitely Craig.)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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