so an apple walks into a bar... I'm terrible at making jokes...

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What's green and has wheels? A green car.

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What is funnier than 24 69

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Why is America so great? Because the continent is really large.

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What's the difference between a jew and pizza? A Jew is human and pizza is food.

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How do you confuse a gay person? How? 7

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Roses are red Violets are blue Deez nuts Ha goteem

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The doctor asks the patient how he's doing, the patient says fine. The doctor says "that's weird cause you have leukemia."

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The banana, the raspberry and the pear arrived to the party, then the carrot and the tomato arrived as well, but when the apple and the orange arrived the banana left... ...This where just getting to fruity...

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How come Tommy isn't allowed to sing anymore? Because he has a punctured artery, collapsed lung, fractured ribcage, and a failed organ...

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My piggy bank is empty. No change there then

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james schmitt whats your last name

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If Michelle rides her bike at 15 mph for 20 minutes and Erik rides his bike at 20 mph for 12 minutes, why is Michelle not in the kitchen?

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Noses are red, pilots are blue I am dyxslexic boo who

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What do you call a computer running Windows DOS? Obselete

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind

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What's big? Jupiter.

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Knock knock Who's there? Me. Idiot.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Matters the size of the bathtub and the size of the babies.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the most direct path to his destination.

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Why did the black man get pulled over by a cop? He was driving 12 miles over the speed limit.

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i stole a monkey from a man in a yellow hat his name is george now his name is i hate you

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died Why did the other boy fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third boy fall out of the tree? Prepressure

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sharks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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