Your momma is so ugly... Yeah, yeah, yeah my momma's ugly, but guess what, at least I'm not an orphan asshole.

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What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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Have you heard of the Armenian genocide? No? Me neither.

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Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

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Roses are red Violets are red My lawn is red My fences are red It appears my garden is on fire.

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ROMEO ROMEO WHEREFORE ART THOU ROMEO

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What is exceptionally dangerous? Shaving while taking a bath, because the risk of electrocution is extremely high.

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting black lady. wha....... ehmmm hmmmm!

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What is small, green, lives 10 meters under the ground and eat rocks? The little green rock eater!

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knock knock. whos there? the police. we have news about your daughter. She has been tortured and raped and you will never see her again for the man that took her has taken her out of our jurisdiction.

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What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? Wanted by the police.

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What do you call Americas first black president? A change.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had down-syndrome

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If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

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Your mom is so old, she was able to have children around the time you were born.

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Did you hear about the Blonde who fell off a cliff You Have? Oh Ok, Have a nice day

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What do you call a blonde falling off a cliff? Screwed.

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A Man, a chicken and a horse walk in to a bar and sit down at the stools near the jukebox. The jukebox is playing Love Me Tender. The Bartender notices the man pull something from his pocket and hand it to the chicken who takes it in her beak and then turns to the horse and passes it to him. "What'll it be?" says the Bartender. "methamphetamines", says the horse ironically.

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Wanna hear a hot headed retard? call and listen carefully 6196342668

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What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

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Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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your mom is so fat that she should probably try a deit in the neer future.

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How many juice does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops