What do a black man and a dog have in common? They're both going to die some day.

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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Why didn't children go to their grandma at summer? Cause, they were hit by a car earlier that year and they are dead.

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Whats funnier than a black guy dieing? Everything thats not funny

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If at first you don't succeed, go kill yourself

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When is a tree not a tree? When it's a rock.

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whats worse than the halocaust? disney channel.

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A fish swims into a bar The town is flooded and thousands are dead

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Why aren't anti jokes funny? Idk. Watermelon in your pants, you're adopted.

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the battle of waterloo

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Roses are red Violets are blue we're going to have sex because i'm stronger than you

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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A man spoke in a high-pitched voice. Another man said "Are you gay" He responded, "Why, yes"

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What did the father give to his son with terminal cancer for his 5th birthday? Nothing the kids going to die anyway

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A Dog walked into a bar and the bartenter said 'What can i get you' the dog dident say aneything cuz its a dog!!!!!

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A sign at the drug rehab centre said keep off the grass. Jimmy thought it was a joke. So the groundskeeper chopped his legs off.

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What happened at the finish line of the marathon? People collapsed in exhaustion, it was a marathon.

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What rhymes with shuck and starts with an f flamethrower

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"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

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There is a terrorist attack. Muslims are blamed for it.

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if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

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So there's this white guy with a huge dick.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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Why did the retarded man jump off a building to commit suicide? He didn't try to commit suicide. He was mentally retarted and didn't know any better.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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