Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah!

im jewish

What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff. What's not pink and fluffy? Rape.

A politician from the National Country Party keeps interjecting - "I'm a country member, i'm a country member' "yes we remember" says Gough whitlam

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

what did the kid say when he didnt see the ice and sliped and broke his arm ouch that beep hurt

Knock Knock Whose there? Lemons Lemons who? The fruit

You are so ugly that when you were born the doctor didn't say anything to your mother because he has social manners.

Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

Why did the bunny cross the road? It didn't, It was hit by a truck...

A woman asked a man in an elevator, "Did you fart?" The man honestly replied, "Yes. I didn't expect you to notice because it was the puffy kind."

A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

What's worse than dividing by zero? Chuck Norris dividing your face!

Knock-knock. Who's there? Steve. Steve who? I just said it was Steve

What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

I'm Stephen Hawking, and I'm a PC. I can't walk or talk, and I'm a Stephen Hawkings

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

What did the person say to the other person? "Hello."

Knock Knock Who's There? Bill Bill Who? Builder

Why did the Muslim suicide bomber commit suicide? He was nervous and didn't think he could hijack a plane.

Robin, get into the Batmobile.

why did hellen keller kiss a girl? another blind date

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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