How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

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I was once raped by an Asian... it didnt hurt

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We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

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Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

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Q. What happened when a mouse ran up the clock and it struck 12? A. It fell off and got raped by an 80 year old Asian lady with breast cancer

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Doctor, I am afraid of getting sexually abused. Hmm, sounds serious, take off all your clothes so we can get a proper look.

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what did the blond say to his mother?? Nothing. He is deaf and has to use sign language.

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Q: what do you call a person who's ass is dumb A: a dumbass

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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Why was the man lying under a sheet. Because he was dead.

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Do you have liquid tape? No ( But he really did)

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Joseph Fritzl.

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the bully said, you're just small fries. the fries couldn't help it someone ordered a small!

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What has four legs and starts with the letter D? A cow.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall?? A: It depends on how hard you throw them!!

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Knock knock Who's there Evan Evan who Evans erectile area is largo with Sarah plains pudding

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Q-What happened to the kid who thought he could fly A-his head exploded while he was sitting in a microwave

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so a kangaroo a piece of cake and a whale are all doing... ...nothing they would not hang out together

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What do you call a pig sizzling in a pan? BACON!

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A black guy and a white guy are in a car. What is going to happen? They will arrive at their destination.

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Q. What do you call a guy who only drinks lite beer. A. His name.

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One day there was 2 black guys in hoodys with knives in there hand. They tapped me on the shoulder and took my groceries. They then made me a jam sandwich and went on there way

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Why did a mass amount of people move to Florida? They came to murder their children and get away with it.

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ARGH! LADY THAT SNAKE BIT MY PECKER! YOU HAVE TO SUCK THE POISON OUT NOW! OMG SURE, err...Meh, thats not a poisonous snake... Oh... dammit! I mean phew! Ouch ouch ouch!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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