Kevin was very nervous going into his job interview. So he pretended he was a salad and ate himself.

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i like potatoes

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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Leave her alone...

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Two Jewish men are walking when they see a penny on the ground. They continue walking because pennies are not worth picking up in today's economy

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What do you get when two chickens cross a road? -Salmonella stricken hobos

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Nothing exceedingly odd happened at a bar

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an irishman an american and a jihadist get a plane were did they go right through my house

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what did the black man eat for dinner? whatever his wife makes for him to eat

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Dr. Fishbourne Dr. Fishbourne? Yea, I've come to inform you that your son has committed suicide due to lack of parental care and love.

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender says ouch.

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Dr. Dick Howard Long visits a friend in England. Arriving at his friend's house, he knocked at the door. A butler then lets him in and asks, "Sir, would you like to wait while the Master bathes?" The doctor then replies, "Sure thing, I'll wait until he's done."

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How did the blind man know when to open his parachute when he went skydiving? The leash went slack.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the slaughterhouse was on the other side.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Okay

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my hand is a DOLPHIN!

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was simply tired of being mocked and judged by society.

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Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

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Get off my porch.

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What's funnier than the Holocaust? Most things, as the Holocaust was a terrible tragedy.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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A husband said to his wife, "If you want to have sex, stroke my penis one time. If you don't want to have sex, just say so and I will respect your decision, though I may be disappointed."

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"hey those pancakes look pretty good." "thats a cat steve."

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Why does Gandalf have special powers? Because Dumbledore died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops