What did the snowman say when winter was ending? -Nothing you dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q. How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A. Actually woodchucks can't chuck wood only beavers can

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender stands speechless due to the ridiculousness of the situation -Tag

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do Chinese people call Chinese food? Food.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Roses are red. Violets are purple. Haha. Purple.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why are black people so fast? They probably practice.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme but this one doesn't

thumb_up thumb_down +10

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. What about the vampires?

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Do you know what has always angered me about people not choosing to control their own lives Nero?

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's worse than spending time with Inlaws? Spending time with outlaws.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why was the black man arrested? Tax evasion.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Q. How do you get a black man out of a tree? A. You get a ladder and help him down

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q.What's green and smells like grass??? A. Grass

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why is there velcro on the edge of the table. Because its there to hold the microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Whats worse then getting caught in the rain with no umbrella? Aids.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Roses are red Violets are red Bushes are red Why's my garden on fire?

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops