Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is both blind and deaf, and doing so would put others in danger.

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What's green, long, and covered in forks? Grass. I lied about the forks.

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Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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There was a black person running down my street. He was celebrating because he just graduated from Harvard University.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's rich...

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What is black and white and red all over? Black people in a blender. I lied about the white

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roses are red, violets are violet.

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Penis

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Hey are you from Tennessee, 'cause you have a very nice accent.

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if I was a girl I would be touching my self everywhere if I was a girl as a boy I would make a diffrence in poltics but thats not gonna happen.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

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A: Knock Knock B: ...

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What did one volcano say to the other? Hey.... wana get some lunch... later, not now of course it's WAAAAY TOO EARLY!

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golf is so gay i mean look at what they name the different clubs 3 wood 4 wood 5 wood 6 wood just give it a beat and you got a catchy song

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Roses are red Violets are? blue I'm going to rape you in the ass with a rake.

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What's better than Westboro Church? Committing over 9000 sins.

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Why was the pencil case unzipped? Because it wasn't zipped up.

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what's the difference between a bearded man and bearded lady the bearded man has a penis

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Q: What genre is the bible? A: Si-fi

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I have a sandwich and chips for lunch! But instead of a sandwich I have macaroni, and instead of chips I have no friends.

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What is the #1 cause of pedophiles? Sexy children

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Why couldn't Sally ride a bicycle? She doesn't have a bicycle. She also doesn't have legs.

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Whats green and gets you really high? A green airplane

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96 there mad at each other instead its 69

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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