Q: how many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: two, one to hold the ladder securely and the other to screw in the lightbulb.

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What did Justin Bieber say when he lost his tampon? Where's my tampon?

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why did the clown cross the road? to kill everyone in the dark knight midnight premiere

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Is that a baby in your carriage or are you just happ..... WTF. WHERES ITS EYES!? **purges**

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Women's Rights

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What is green and fuzzy and can kill you when it falls out of a tree A pooltable

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have you ever noticed that when geese are flying in a V, that one side is longer? Do you know why? no...why? There is more on one side

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A very ugly man with has sex with a lamb because he is so ugly. He subsequently gets ghonorhea and dies 2 years later of brain cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was in the oven

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If Voldemort was gay who would be his partner? Happy potter

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Hello penis

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Why do black people like chicken? Because it's tasty, nutritious and easy to cook.

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You know you're drunk when you've spend a significant amount of time consuming alcohol.

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What the difference between a ferarri and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage. That would be murder.

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What did the bear say to the mouse? Roar.

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Q: why did the plain crash A: the driver is a loaf of bread

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A man walks into a bar. The barman says, 'why the lo-, wait, i thought you was that horse again.'

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A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

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What did Chuck Norris say to the puppy? Aww what a cute dog.

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Why did the woman call 911? Fire.

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Q:how do confuse courtney A: give her a beer

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have u ever have to clean up ur own poop? me niether.

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What is the difference between being a serial killer and a doctor? I'm not a doctor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops