Guess what I was with your mom last night so I wraped her in foil and put her in the oven.

Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

Word play, punch-line, joke.

So a girl says "I want to be a banana when I grow up". She's set unrealistic goals and her parents fear she may be autistic.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was crossing the road it tripped on a rock. When it was getting back up, a bus went through a stop sign and ran it over. After suffering for 3 weeks in an animal hospital, the chicken died.

A cow walks into the butcher shop, he looks around then mourns the loss of his brothers

How did the little boy break his arm? He was trampleed by elephants.

How do you make a sandwich out of clay? Shape it like a sandwich

wat do call a joke thats funny a funny joke

What's worse than eating a baby? Eating two babies filled with maggots.

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Stewie: MOM! MOMMY! MOMMY! MOMMA! MOMMY! MOM! MOMMA! MOMMY! MOM! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! LOIS! Lois: WHAT!!! Stewie: Hi, hehehehehehe. Family Guy -Louis

Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

Whats worse than a man who has had a hard day at work, he goes to a bar and gets drunk, he goes home and beats his wife? I his wife was fat and had cancer

Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

whats hairy and fat? I DONT KNOW YOU TELL ME RETARD

A blonde, brunette, and red-head were on a deserted island. The blonde said, "in thirty years or so, we'll all have gray hair."

There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

Ask me if im a truck. Are you a truck? Yes.

What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

Why was Joe afraid of Steve? Because Steve raped and killed all of Joe's three children two weeks ago.

Why can't Helen Keller just kidding she's dead

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

why did the man french kiss the horse? because he was high on l.s.d and confused the horse for an attractive male because he himself was homosexual ps vagina monkeys and chili

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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