Knock Knock Who's there Nobody is here. This is just a feeble attempt of your subconsious to convince yourself you have someone who cares about you in the least bit to mask the horrible wretched pain of loneliness and suffering that is the enternal damnation of your life.

What is the biggest killer in America? Death.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I

What would Steve Jobs be doing if he were alive today? Dying.

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms, legs, and an eyepatch A: Names

How do you know if you've been drinking too much? You find yourself in a closet screaming, "I'm in Narnia!!!"

why do you park in the driveway and drive on the park way

Why did the homeless man cross the road? The soup kitchen has just reopened after months of rebuilding from a fire. He was very hungry.

Q: What do you call a robot in a concert? A: Electric fan

Doctor: Knock knock. Patient: Whose there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor. Patient: Interrupting doc... Doctor: Your son has AIDS and will die soon.

A quadrapeldgic walks no where

The umpire asked the baseball coach "Who is that on 1st base?" The baseball coach said "Who." The umpire said "Yes, that's what I'm asking." The baseball coach handed the umpire a list of his players to avoid any further confusion.

What's ur favorite color? Cancer Made by mark

What did one muffin say to the other muffin... Nothing they are muffins.

What did the German say to the Jew? I'm not quite sure; I don't speak German.

The MLS

Women's Rights

What the did the man say to his boss? You are my boss.

Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? Fuck you.

knock knock. who is there ? nobody.you have no friends.

A man who was not blind, but could not see, walks around a metal bar, and proceeds to the bar, where he walks into the door without opening it first

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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