A man walks into a bar and the the llama next store sprouted wings and flew Then a potato says hi to a iPod but unfortunatly the iPod can't talk. Meanwhile hello kitty and ducks wage a nuclear war and the rise of ostriches Started. The a giant cucumber started falling of mt. Everest and killed many Flying platipuses were saved. Then aliens started invading and the world ended.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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a doctor came into the room after receiving a woman's test results for lung cancer. the woman says, "is it negative or positive doctor?" the doctor looks at the woman and says, "it's negative, congratulations."

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What do you call a sandwich that has sandwich on it? A sandwich.

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what do you call a a miget crossed with a vampire? A miget, vampires are a figment of you're screwed up imagination.

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Your mom is such a big whore that she sleeps with your dad.

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Why did the fly get off the toilet? It got pissed off.

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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So, there's three blondes. Two of them walk into a bar. The third one missed it.

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What did the black man do when i shit in he's pant? Changed pants.

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why didnt the dog bark? he died in his sleep

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A mexican Police officer walks into a crime scene. "Ouch." he exclaims, rubbing his forehead where a red bump is already surfacing.

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Little Jimmy was afraid, and didn't like Santa Claus. So one Christmas Eve, he poured rat poison in Santa's milk. Little Jimmy no longer has parents.

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What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

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Whats Green and Smells Like Grass? Grass

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Why are Jewish men circumcised? Because it is the norm with that particular religious group to circumcise male infants shortly after birth.

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Q.what happens if a fat man see's a black man? A. the fat man eats the black man thinking that he was chocolate

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why did the chicken cross the road? orange you glad I didn't say banana

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A horse walks into a bar. The waiter asks: 'Why the long face?' The horse, not understanding English, takes a crap on the floor and walks out.

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Two men are making sandwiches, one man is spreading peanut butter over the bread and the other man is spreading honey and Italian raspberry jam over rye bread. the man with the peanut butter sandwich looks over and says "HEY, where did you get the rye bread?" and the man with the rye bread says "well my wife made it yesterday and I would be delighted if you come over for some tea, and tried some of my wife's homemade rye bread".

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

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What is black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, bleeding, mixed race babies.

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How do u make a fat person cry......... tell em mc donnalds is closed (^_^)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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