What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack, due to her poor eating habits.

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why did the black man rape the little girl? no reason, its just a part of life. oh well

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How many friends did Jeffery have? 0 because he ate them and put them in his fridge.

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What's better than winning a Gold Medal in the Special Olympics? Not being handicapped in the first place.

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A chicken walked into the bar...

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Do you need a life...? You can borrow mine! lol JUBIE! :()

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Why I am at the hospital now: True as it gets. I found on my working desk a small box of fluoride pills, I was like meh, but it said banana, strawberry, mint and pear, so I was like yeah! And grabbed a mouthful before going URGH! Then my friends entered laughing saying "I hope you do well on that test tomorrow!" So yeah, I passed out, and it turns out my "friends" (victims ill torture to they beg for death). 80 MG OF VALIUM!!! Yeah good trucking luck on my test eh? I nearly died twice, somehow, I think I should ask doc if my heart is okay or something, my head is fucked up the floor is all wavy and I cant differentiate numbers Seriously, one guy was gonna come visit say sorry, but he sent his girlfriend instead... My wife was so worried, that when I said: Mind if I have my vengeance by screwing his girlfriend? My wife said: I was so worried, you still okay? That actually sounds like a good scheme... So, yeah... I am typing this because, I am totally going to have a threesome... When and if my ever wakes up again... She agreed... She was always kinda into me but still! If you dont understand this, well... Next time, if you want to poison me, USE SOMETHING THAT KILLS ME! BECAUSE I WILL BE BACK!

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Why was the chubby bird that you were staring at you angry. Because you were looking at him.

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Whats big, yellow and red? a school bus with a bunch of dead children.

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How many Muslims does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Q: Why did Rapunzel fall out of the tower? A: Because she was a dumb bitch.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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a chicken and a rooster walk into a bar. and then walk out because a bar is no place for a chicken and a rooster.

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How do you catch a unique animal? You get professional hunters to catch the animal.

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Q: What happens when a Jew with a boner runs into a wall? A: He breaks his nose.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Spanish Inquisition.

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Did you know Hellen Keller had a tree house? No Neither did she

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I like to use vasoline during sex. I put it on the doorknob so she can't escape.

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Q: why did a sanke have a rattle A: it was born wiith it

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Why did Susie fell off the swings? Because she didn't have any arms or legs.

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How do you call a gay that is playing poker with friends You say "call" and place the right amount of fiches on the table, at that moment you are still in the race to win the pot.

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What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

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What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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