What headphones does the farmer use? He is going through a financial struggle at the moment and cannot afford such a luxury.

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When life gives you lemons, you are most likely in the fruit section of the grocery store.

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I just missed my bus. At least I haven't got cancer.

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What does Mr. Newell have? - Diabetes. Mr. Newell has diabetes.

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Ryan O'Sullivan likes to suck his own penis. - Ryan O'Sullivan.

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roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a corvette? I didn't get 20 years for owning a corvette.

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Why do basketball players wear bibs? They don't.

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Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with other men other than her husband.

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Yo mama is so stupid... She didn't graduate high school.

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What did the man do with his bread He ate it

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What floats in the toilet and looks like a log? A log.

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Q:What were Helen Keller's dying words? A: Speaking is difficult when you have no way of hearing others. Apart from that, just hours before you die, you become unaware of your surroundings, and have a harder time communicating. Both these problems merged together made it basically impossible for her to speak before death.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom likes dick and so do you

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I ASKED YOU FIRST!

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whats my name? Matt

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A priest and a rabii walk into a bar. Both men, despite both being good people and well respected in their communities, aren't able to overcome their differences which are signified by their religions. Both men later leave the bar and surround themselves with people of their own kin.

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girl: Daddie, what's at the end of a rainbow? Dad: No sweetie, a rainbow is acually just an illusion constructed by the refraction of light white as it passes through a water particle in the stratophere. Acting as a prisom the particle will seperate the different components of light, ordering them by the rank of the light energy and the intencity of it's frequency and wavelength.

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Chuck Norris' farts are silent and deadly. Deadly because he's Chuck Norris, silent because his butthole is extremely loose

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what do a heater and a dead baby have in common? a dead baby is only warm for a small period of time

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a mulslim wlaks past a bomb shop on his way to join the international peace club

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Slug on ya tooth Gavin David Newman

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How does a blonde get pregnant? (I don't know) And you thought blondes were dumb.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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