Why couldn't the boy see? He was dead

What do you do if you find blood in your poo? Stop stabbing yourself in the arse with a fork on wednesdays...

Q what r u eating under there? Aunderwear ewww thats nasty

Doctor! Doctor! There's a fly in my soup! Gross.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

A black man "walks into" a club. Several minutes later he is dead. The police, in a later press conference, refuse to admit that the club ever left the officer's belt.

What did the homeless man get for his birthday. Nothing. Get it: He lived a life along with a giant family and on christmas eve 2012 he broke his kneecap and was in the E.R. He got out of the hospital on christmas only to come home to find a burning house; his house. Every member in his family died except for him as they were all in the house when it caught on fire. The house completely burnt and crumbled, and that is why he is homeless.

What's the difference between you and yourself? Yourself has 4 more letter in it.

There once was a man from Nantucket He decided to sail to Portland Now he lives in Portland.

What is the least racist animal? A panda. It's black, white and Asian.

You: Want to hear a joke? Person: Yeah You: Me too

A Black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Who is driving? The black guy. Its his car.

How many licks did it take for the little boy to get to the center of the Tootsie Pop? Three, and then he choked and died.

why are black people so good at sports? hard work and dedication

If you are riding a horse, how many watermelons does it take to kill a giraffe? Platypus.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong WALKS on the moon. Michael Jackson rapes little boys

What is the different between going to church and reading a newspaper? You can take your shoes off when you read a newspaper.

What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

Roses are red, Violets are blue, sorry i gave you Herpes type 2.

Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

Hey I just banged you, and it was crazy, delete my number, and keep the baby.

How many kids with Asperger's does it take to change a light bulb? Tyrannosaurus lived in the Cretaceous Period.

Why wasn't Justin Bieber allowed in the men's bathroom? It was closed for maintenance.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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