A Gamer walks into the tavern, the bartender says to him, "just dont act like you control the place!"

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A very rich man had a daughter whom all of the men in town wanted to marry her for wealth. Except there was one man who wanted to marry her due to his love for her. The father let his daughter marry whomever she wanted from all of the men in town, and she chose a man named Wilson Fremblington who wanted to marry her for wealth, because he was physically fit and overall a friendly man.

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How did the mexican cross the border? He went through border patroll, and then later became a legal citizen of North America

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Which brains do zombie like most? Zombies dont exist.

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roses are red violets are indigo

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The continent of Africa is mired in corruption, poverty, food crises, disease, and the exploitation of its resources. Happy Kwanzaa

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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how do you make a baby cry? put a nail through its foot

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what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

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What do you throw a drowning guitarist? An emergency floatation device.

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What happened to the frog that broke down? It got toad.

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What Batman Said to Robin before getting into the car? I'll drive.

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if a fat man in a red suit puts you in a bag at night. its not santa your getting raped

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I've just been struck by an enormous bolt of lightning. I am covered in boils and my house is full of frogs. I strongly recommend that when referring to God, always use the upper case 'H' on all personal pronouns.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father, prepare to die.

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'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

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What do you call a blonde on anti-joke? Fairly paranoid because of the typical blonde stereotype.

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No thank you, I don't like violence

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell down and bumped his head He suffered a serious concussion and was never the same again.

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What has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

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Yo Momma is so fat she is at risk of contracting Type 2 Diabetes.

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*via text message* Me: Hey Trevor! You at home? Trevor: This is Trevor's mom. Trevor committed suicide today.. Me: OMG! Why?!? Trevor: Because when I gave him a glass of water, it had 3 ice cubes. Trevor doesn't like odd numbers.

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What happend to the girl in the corner? Idk that's why I asked!! :P

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A man is talking nonsense at a wall when another man walks up to him. "Why are you talking at a wall?" "I'm trying to appease the mighty wall god Kaleothayrhonka." "Cool, let me join you!" And they both talk at the wall for hours on end because they are stupid that way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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