whats green and falls from trees, pool tables.

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A duck flew calmly through the air and landed softly on a beautiful lake, where he was then shot for trespassing.

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what did the boy in the blue hat do? wear his blue hat

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left the gate open, letting all his livestock escape, and crushing his prospects of trying to keep his family fed.

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Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why did the hipster burn his mouth on a piece of pizza? Because the pizza was on fire.

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What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

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A kid finds a bag of heroine. He is a good Samaritan and asks the nearest junkie if it belonged to him.

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Bad grammers.

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What is a gremlin's favorite snack? Gremlins aren't real.

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Obama being reelected.

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Your mum is SO fat... She died of a heart attack

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Lacrosse

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Why did the man eat a human heart? Because he was part of a dangerous, religious cult.

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Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

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What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

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Roses are red Violets are blue you smaell funny just like my poo! this came from the BOTTOM of our hearts!

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A black guy and a white guy are walking down the sidewalk. As it suddenly begins to rain, what does the white guy say to the black guy? Nothing. They did not know each other.

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Roses are red Here's something new Violets are violet NOT F**KING BLUE

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your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

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So a Mexican a Jew and a Philippino walk across the street What Happened? the border patrol shot them

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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1: Hey whats better than bacon? 2: What? 1: Nothing. Nothing is better than bacon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops