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How many licks does it take to get to center of a tootsie pop? pickles, 7:00 pm, wood, shoulder pain

a man and his son pull up out side b&q and the man says to his son run in there and get me a black n decker and the boy goes in and is standing in the power tools isle and he looks round and there is a lady standing next to him so he hit her, the woman happened to be black and 2 minutes later a security guard rushes round and says son what did u do that for and the son said my dad told me to come in and get a black n decker!

What's the difference between a piano and a goldfish? One's a piano, the other is a goldfish.

A mentally disabled person asked a tree, "Are you a tree?" the tree didn't say anything because it can not speak.

What did the black man do when KFC got his order wrong? He gave his receipt to the cashier and kindly asked for the correct meal.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock knock? Whos there? Not Sally. What did Sally get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why did your mom cross the road? She Tripped and started rolling

Life is like swimming. When you drown you die.

Whats green and red, in a ditch, and has cookie crumbs all over it. The girl scout i ran over with my car.

What's worse than anti-joke.com? Non-anti-joke.com! Louis

Charlie, Charlie the drunk guinea pig! OUR BEST FRIEND!!! Angel Charlie: I'm already dead yah poof!!! Butt cancer killed me.....

A farmer accidentally trips his wife. She falls down the stairs and the farmer is quickly arrested for murder.

What do a tree and a boy have in common? They both cry when you hit them with an axe... except the tree.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a load of bread.

Beware of orange frogs with black stripes! They are dangerous! On the other hand, if you see a black frog with orange stripes, you're in no danger.

Three Jews walk into a bar... I lied, it was a gas chamber.

Q: Why did the prostitute have no arms? A: Because she was an amputee.

What happened when the blackman saw the white man. they both said hello

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? Cue annoying little kids saying WHAT!!!!!!!!! A: To check out all the chicks

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, he didn't my car got to him first.

What ticks like a clock and has numbers on it? A clock.

Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

what do you call an elevator full of white people. a box of crackers

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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