Q: Where did little Suzie go during the bombing? A:Everywhere

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What do you call a man with no home or family? Charles Manson…He currently resides in jail.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car

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A man was complaining about not getting enough sleep. He was then raped.

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You're pretty... PRETTY UGLY

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What is an antijoke? Not Knock

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what is hollow and bloody? Vagina when it gets genital herpes

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A hispanic walks down the street. ICE quickly arrests him, as he is here illegally. 5 months after deporting, he crosses the southern US border to try again.

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Who's looking for judicial toenail clippings?

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A Starfish walks into a bar. He sits down next to a man with a concussion. Q: What did the man say? A: Nothing because he was in a concussion and was no longer able to say words.

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I'm going as the joker for halloween

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A small plane is carrying three passengers: a young boy scout, a priest, and the smartest black man on earth. Due to improper planning, there are only three parachutes on the plane. The engines cut and the pilot takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The black man says, "I am the smartest black man in the world. I need to live." He takes a parachute and jumps out of the plane. The priest says to the boy scout, "Son, you take the last parachute. I have lived a full life." After a very touching moment, the boy scout puts on the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Minutes later, the priest dies a horrific death as the plane crashes into the desert.

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what do you say when you see a winner weaner

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How do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family...

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Because he thought it was a game. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it had no arms. Why did Little Timmy fall off of his bike? Because he was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator. Knock knock Who's there? Not Little Timmy.

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Roses are red violets are blue, he is for me and not for you, he's too ugly you can have him

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If life gives you lemons, squeeze it in life' s eyes.

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Q: How do you confuse a blond A: You don't they are born that way

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whats the difference between a male porsche driver and a porcupine? with porcupines,the pricks are on the outside.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You like penis, That's what you live up to.

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I like my women how I like my salad. Without a penis.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why did Hellen Keller get hit by a car? She didn't see it coming. (TD)

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A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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