Correct grammar and proper use of capitals on the internet. Oh yeah, and a horse walked into a bar. It didn't think much of it.

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A man has had too many beers late at night. The bartender says "Sir, I'm going to have to cut you off"

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How do you get a Jewish man out of a pool? Ask him politely, for I'm sure he's a pleasant and reasonable fellow.

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What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

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http://richardfigures.com/

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How did the little boy get out of the forest? -He didnt, he was devoured by a pack of wovles.

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What is worse than being paralyzed from the neck down Nothing

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why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7-8-9

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A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

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I tried to play soccer a long time ago. I didn't score and managed to get red card... Then I realized it was not my thing

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Two condoms walk into a gay bar. The people in the bar are perplexed that two inanimate objects are capable of locomotion.

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finding nemo didnt make sense how could a shark go on a no fish diet

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What happenswhen a geman shepard jumps into a lake? it gets wet

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I like my kids how i like my coffee I dont like coffee

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a pack of wolverines and decided the best idea was to run away, and this decision just happened to involve him crossing a road.

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what do you call the quadriplegic man who went water skiing? Skip

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Why did the fat man cross the road? Because he felt that being overweight, he had to do something about it and go to the gym.

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Roses are bitches Violets are two, your mother is a bigger bitch then both

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What do an elephant and a grape have in common? They're both purple... except for the elephant.

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Why did the baby fall out the window? Because the parents left the window open by the crib.

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Why did susy give up in the corner? Cause she couldnt fight off the black man.

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chuck norris and superman had a bet. Chuck norris immediatley won because superman is a fictional character played by an actor. Chuck norris then decided to have a bet with the actor that played superman and lost

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What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

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Why didn't the boy get what he wanted for christmas? His parents had killed him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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