What do the angels say when god sneezes? Chuck bless you

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why the f*** do so many people ask this question?

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Q: What did the homless man get for chritsmas? A: Frostbite

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You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

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What's worse than bombs? Nukes

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How do you make a car? You build it.

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Why couldn't the horse open the door? - Because it was locked...Beeeeeeeeeeeeeef Jelly

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

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If you were an octopus what would you? Say "I an octopus".

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What's dark, scary, and full of puppies? My van. I lied about the puppies...

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my penis, so suck it baby.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

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Why did the baby cry? Because his parents dropped him on his head.

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What do you call a cheese that's not yours? Cheese

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what can't you see but stalks you all day and night? ME!!!

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if she is old enough to bleed, she probably wears tampons.

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why was it sad that 3 men were crossing rail road tracks in a toyota and got hit by a train? they ruined the Toyota

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What's black and white and red all over? An interracial couple in a car crash.

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Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Kncok Whose there? Not Sally

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yo mamas so poor she should probably consider finding a job

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What did the black do when a man robbed his house? He called 911

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How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

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Chuck Norris died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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