There's a plane with 5000 bricks in it, one falls out. How many bricks are on the plane now? 4999 How do you get an elephant in the fridge? U open the fridge,put the elephant in and close the fridge. How do you get a deer in the fridge? Open the fridge, take the elephant out and close the fridge. A lion is trowing a party and the whole animal kingdom shows up, what animal isn't there? The deer cause he's still in the fridge. A little old lady is walking threw an alligator and snake invested swamp. *The snakes and alligators eat her (wrong answer) The brick falls on her head

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Knock Knock Whos there? Your mom My mom died three years ago, please go away while i cry.

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How did your baby die. She suffacted by your smell

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The economy sucks. REM broke up. A man killed himself.

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What does a person and a tree have in common? You can knock them down if you hit them repeatedly with an axe.

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What happens to a banana after it gets sunburnt? It peels.

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Why was the man scared? Because he was being attacked by a giant tiger.

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What does a carrot and a potato have in common? They're both not chocolate

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What did the elephant say to the whale? Nothing, neither can talk and they live in very different biomes.

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What did one friend say on his friend's myspace page? You need a Facebook

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A duck flies to someone's backyard pool. Moments later it takes a dump , then suddenly flies away.

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What did the white guy say to the Mexican guy? Nothing he realize that the Mexican guy probably didn't speak English and he couldn't speak Spanish so conversing with this man would have been pointless.

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What do you call an horse? A horse, because horse does not start with a vowel and that would be grammatically incorrect.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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Who won the race? I don't know look it up.

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What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

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Roses are cars, violets are rude, this poem makes no sense, neither do you

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Where do you find a good lawyer? In the cemetary

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What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

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The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

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What does Helen Keller order at McDonalds? Food.

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what"s short , has a tail , and is amazing ? maddy cartwright i lied about the tail!

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The chicken crossed the road and died. The end.

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Jacob loves stroking his gf's doodle every lunch break. He was embarrased cause it was bigger than his.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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