How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

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roses are blue violetrs are green im shooting heroine into my head

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Why did the child get an 100% on a test?? Because they got all the questions correct.

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How do you catch a unique animal? You get professional hunters to catch the animal.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Grim Reaper. The Grim Reaper who? Joking with me will not postpone your death.

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A Rabbi, a Priest, and an Atheist walk into a restaurant. They receive terrible service, and do not leave a tip.

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A duck walks into a doctor's office, and says 'Quack!' The doctor is offended and resigns.

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A man walks into a bar. It was a salad bar, so he left.

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you know what hurts.... PAIN

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the world flooded and everybody died how did they die? the all fell into lava!

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What do you call a Jew reading a book in the library? Steve Goldberg. .

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Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

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What did the doctor say to the pregnant mother? Your babies dead

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whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

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What do you call a man with no friends? Terry

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how did the horse fall into the river? he sliped

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What do you call a Jewish dinosaur? Fossil Fuel

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-Knock! Knock! -Who's there? -Bob. Is Brian's here? -Wrong adress. Brian's home is the first one at your right. -Oh sorry. Have a nice day.

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What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the world series? No Cubs!

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did you know hellen keller had a dog? niether did she

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There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

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What do you call 4 Mexicans at the bottom of the ocean? Cuatro sinco.

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What did the horse say to the other horse? Neigh

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A tree fell in the forest. The person in the house it hit heard it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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