knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... Your mom's a wh0re.

What did Helen Keller say? Obcojbcidjbcidjbdijcbd

A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

G:nock nock B:come in!

What did the man say to the other man? yummmmm

why did the chicken cross the road? it was making its way home after a long day of luckless job interviews

A man walks into a bar and orders an alcoholic beverage. The bartender serves him and inquires about the man's day. The man says nothing, drinks his beverage, pays his tab and walks out.

Whats the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

What's the difference in a big brother and a wee brother? Ones big, ones small.

Where does piglet look for Pooh? The hundred acre forest, you creep.

Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

How can you make a little boy tell the truth? Threaten to murder his family.

A guy walks into a bar and finds a genie. The genie says he'll grant him 3 wishes. He wished for a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. POOF! All 3 wishes were granted to him. The blonde drinks a shot a tequila, the brunette drinks a beer, and the redhead drinks a whiskey. They had a great time.

Science fact: what would happen if you lined up all the veins in your body? You would die.

So Helen Keller walks into a bar...

Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

What do you do when there is a truck on the interstate? Nothing.

A man asks a young boy to get in his van. The kid, being very well-educated tells the man he cannot talk to strangers. So, the man tells the kid he understands, and drives away to another nearby child.

RULES: #1) have fun #2) safety first

What's funny about water, food, and shelter? Nothing, those are essential necessities to live your life, unless you have chains attached to your ankles with bricks on the other end and you're thrown in the middle of the ocean with no chance what so ever

Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had brain cancer.

Name a country that begins with the letter U A. True B. False C. All of the above D. None of the above

Whats worse than finding 2 worms in your apple? 2 Holocausts.

Why did the spider cross the road? He was stapled to the chickens back.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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