A woman walks into a bar and asks for a duck. The bartender is confused, assumes the women has some sort of mental problem, and treats her nicely, as his sister suffers from Down's Syndrome.

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Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

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What did the fat man say when he was offered infinite french fries for life? Yes.

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There is a dead guy on the road lying in a puddle of blood with a gunshot wound on his head. What happened? He died

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Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

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What do you call a half-Latino, half-Asian baby? The product of a healthy interracial couple.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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How did the man lose his arm? beacuse of the five year old with a knife obsesion standing right beind you at this minute...

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What has 389,236,587 arms, has rainbow colored fur, and fornicates on your front lawn? Absolutely nothing. That's pretty much physically impossible.

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Why did the penis cross the road? Because a man was humping the chicken

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So there's a black man riding a bike down the street. A police officer pulls him over to tell him that his back tire seems to be flat. The black man says thank you, and continued riding his bike. Later, he would repair his tire.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Six wasn't. He listens in on women's self defense classes and can deliver a kick to the crotch so hard that it will create for you a new vagina.

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how did the doctors try to cure stephen hawking? turn him off then back on again

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Knock knock. Death.

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Q: why do irish people like swimming A: because it's fun

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A young man spent his summer as an intern at a school. He eventually became a real estate agent but it was a pretty cool experience.

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Karen was an average high-schooler. When she got home she often went online to chat with strangers. One day she started chatting with a nice girl named Jami. They really got along, Karen could tell Jami all of her secrets. One day, Karen decided to met her new friend at a local park without telling her parents. When she arrived she discovered the gruesome truth about Jami. Jami wasn't in high-school. She was a ten-foot tall, vicious, velociraptor.

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how do you make a plumber cry?.... kill his family

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Gay jokes aren't funny Cum on guys

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Why did the bones cross the street? They didn't. The dogs ate them.

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A man walked into a bar. He broke his nose.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was among thousands of men who were also from Nantucket.

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Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

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Pitbull is Mr. Worldwide because his music sucks everywhere in the world

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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