Why didn't the 9-year-old girl go to school on monday? Because she lived in a country where women don't have rights and was traded as a commodity for 2 pigs to be a wife for a 43 year old man.

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What is worst than your girlfriend's mother?? Osama Bin Laden's One

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What's funny and arousing? This joke.

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whats worse tan loosing checkers getting lit on fire

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Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

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At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

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Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

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Man 1: What kinds of phones do snails use? Man 2:I don't know, I don't think they do. Snail: The snail said nothing, snails don't speak.

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im not black, im Joseph Kony

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Q. What do you call the person that graduated at the bottom of his medical department? A. Doctor

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My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

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Why did little Betsy have a stomach ache? Her alcoholic mother pinned her down in a drunken rage and made her drink bleach.

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Why are you a chicken? Because I say cock-a-doodle doo

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hard cheese

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Did you know Hellen Keller's dog ran away? You would have to if your name was RaAeltraERKAERMaelaefa

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, as it was crossing the road it tripped on a rock. When it was getting back up, a bus went through a stop sign and ran it over. After suffering for 3 weeks in an animal hospital, the chicken died.

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If you work at Penn State you might want to skip the annual "bring your kid to work day"

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me!

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Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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From the makers of Call of Duty 1, comes Call of Duty 2.

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What do you call it when a multiple personality disorder person masturbates? Rape.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? One is blonde and one is brunette.

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? A game of one-on-one basketball in a common physical education class in present day mexico city.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Nope.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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