Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? She was a mother catering for her child's sporting event.

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What did the cool guy say to Kelly Clarkson? Nothing, she's fat.

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How many jews can you fit into an ash-tray? none because the volume of a human is much greater than an any ash-tray

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What's worse than a baby in a blender? Two babies in a blender

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96

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what is red and lies on the floor? the boy that jumped out of the plane

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A man walks into a bar wearing large and baggy pants. The bartender asks him, "Why the large, baggy pants?" The man replies, "Because they're comfortable."

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Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Because of the green pigments in the leaves known as chlorophyll which are used to capture sunlight.

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Q: How did the woman die in the black neighborhood? A: She suffered a fatal heart attack while visiting one of her friends. Everyone mourned their loss.

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What color is cotton? White Well in Afrca, they grow black cotton

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Do you want to hear a knock knock joke? (Yes) Okay, you start. (Knock knock). Who's there? ...

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How do you kill half the Mexican population? through a penny of a cliff. How do you kill the other half? Tell them its still down there.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

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A man runs into a bar and warns everyone about the hurricane.

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What is the worst thing to say to a dying person? After you die I'm going to defile your corpse, nan.

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Why did the man lose his job at the orange juice factory? Because the economy is shitty and none of the higher ups are willing to take a pay cut and they’re still paying themselves massive bonuses, the result of which are layoffs across all departments.

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A horse walked into a barn...

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bike

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"You must defeat Shen Long to stand a chance"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was being herded into a slaughter house to be killed, then packaged and shipped out to restaurant venders all across the country.

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What do you call a baby impaled on a stick? Lunch.

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what if i told you that leonardo decaprio didnt need an oscar but an oscar needed a leonardo decaprio!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(_)_)=============D

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How is a raven like a writing desk? It isn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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