Robin, get in the Batmobile.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A tragic accident waiting to happen.

Why do vampire's from 'Twilight' sparkle? Because it's a really bad movie.

Patty cake. Which was a pretty funny catchthingie.

Why are cemetaries gated? Typically, to prevent vandalism and the emotional trama it inflicts on the deceaseds' families.

what's red and fluffy ... red fluff

What's green and invisible? Nothing; green and all other colours of the rainbow have wavelengths that occur specifically in the visible range of the electromagnetic spectrum. Therefore any invisible object cannot be green.

What's dried up and smells like potatoes? Potato ships and school french fries.

A:Why did the chicken cross the road? B:To get The Daily.....Do you get it. A:No. B:Me neither..I get The Times.

Knock Knock Dude there is no door

Whats worse than sourcraut? Casey Anthony.

How do you make someone cry Take all of their belongings

All this fuss about drink driving is a load of crap! I frequently drink and drive, and I've never had an accident, apart from one small collision in which my wife was paralysed from the neck down.

There's a car about to hit me.

A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being the worm.

Why doesn't Michael sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

Little Jack Horner sat in a corner, Dead.

if a green person is sitting on a green couch in his green room in his green house on his green lawn in his green town, what color is the sky? blue of course. while it is possibe to paint or make all things described in the above paragraph, you cannot paint the sky green because it is actually the color of light when the suns rays reflect on the water droplets within the ozone layer, thus forming the sky. the sky is not a tangible object, so therfore the paint would not be able to properly rest and dry onto the surface.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a large dog on its side of the road attempting to harass it.

What do you call a gay dinosaur? Megasoreass What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Lickalottapuss What dou you call a gay dinosaurs dog? Megasoreass Rex

Roses are red violets are blue come on love show me you boobs/by kw

What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing. Fruits can't talk.

A fat mexican man runs a marathon. Later, he is hit by a bus and raped by a squirrel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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