There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

What happened to the man who jumped into a puddle? He contracted hypothermia due to the low temperatures of the water. He died the next day.

How come Michael Jackson can draw a perfect circle? He likes little BOYS.

why girl die cancer

a man and a woman walk into a alley. They get mugged the man fights back out of pride and then gets stabbed the woman escapes and then goes to the police the man is then found two days later. *gasp* what a weird dream.

How do you make a little girl cry?

Q: What were Peter's emotions after he bought his $2 million house? A: None, in fact he has no home, family and anyone to help him. his leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

Womens rights

Smoke Day, Every Weed.

What do you call a boy with no arm and no legs in a fire? Screwed.

Three old ladies were sitting on a bench. A man walks up and flashes them. The first old lady had a stroke. The second old lady had a stroke. The third old lady called 911 out of concern for her two friends.

Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks.

how did harry styles get in one diretion god

how many tentacles did the mentally retarded octopus have? answer: 8!

what can keep u alive for many years- -not being shot

YO MAMMA IS SO STUPID, she was recently diagnosed with severe mental retardation and will have to be cared for 24/7

What is the worst part about being a blonde? Random green painted strangers throw forks at you claiming it will confuse you, because they got it off of an anti joke website!

It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

Knock knock! Who's there? Elton. Elton who? Elton John

A man walked into a bar. Too bad he didn't see it.The man was sent to the hospital 2 hours later when a friendly elderly lady found him badly wounded on the ground.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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