Real jokes.

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why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

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POOP.............................................. ITS THE FUNNEST WORD OF ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What's the difference between a woman and a car? A woman is merely a useful object, whereas a car deserves love, care, and respect.

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How do you teach an old dog a new trick? Answer: You can't

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because if you subtract 6 from 7 only one would survive.

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Knock knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Mike Davis from across the street. Come in.

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'A blonde', 'a brunette', and 'a redhead' are ways of referring to women who have hair of a certain color.

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Boy: what to hear a joke? girl: sure. Boy: woman rights.

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What do you call a blind guy in a library? Kevin. Unless his name isn't Kevin.

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? Firetruck. What starts with P and ends in ORN? Popcorn. What starts with S and ends in HIT? Shit.

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roses are red grass is greener get in the bed and suck on my wiener

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A caterpillar and its mom (a butterfly) come upon a lion eating an antelope. The caterpillar says "Mom, why is the lion so mean to the antelope?" The mom replies: "it's the circle of life." The next day, the caterpillar and his mom witness a bird of prey swooping down and eating a mouse. The caterpillar asks why the bird of prey is so mean and the mom responds by saying its the circle of life. The next day, the caterpillar and its mom come across a trail of dead animals. They follow the trail to the end where they see a great lion. The mom opens her mouth to say its the circle of life when her son jumps up and eats the lion. THE END.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

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Say silk 5 times. Silk Silk Silk Silk Silk Now what do cows drink? Water.

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whats stupid and likes dumb jokes? you.

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What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

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What's black and white and eats like a horse? A zebra.

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why did the old man lose his hair Because he had cancer and needed kimmo therapy

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The game!

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What happened to The Guy when he got pissed on he was wet

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What do you get when you cross Bambi and a ghost? Bamboo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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