Your mother is so fat that when she sits around the house she is likely to be there for some time.

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Whats the defination of cruelty

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What did Frodo do when he realized that he needed to destroy the ring? He simply walked into Mordor

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what do you get when you cross an elephant with a lake? swimming trunks.

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Why did the man try to lick his elbow? Because he read a chain email saying no one could lick their elbow and he wanted to see if it was true. You will probably try to do it now too.

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Wife: Does this make me look fat? Husband: Honey, your already fat.

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What's worse than your dad dying in a car crash? Your mom being in the same car.

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WHat did REAAAALLLY Jesus say when, walking on, wat, er?, Will somebody please get me of this floating piece of ice? Please? Stop screaming HALLELUJAH! People: HALLELUJAH!

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Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

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Why doesn't Bella like airplanes? Because her family crashed in one....

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

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How do you confuse a blonde? Beat her with a spatula while in a mankini with a dildo up your ass!

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How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

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How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

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What did the alien say to the parachute? We're connected

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Why was the girl crying? She had just been severely raped.

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Wanna hear a joke? Me to.

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? -Nothing, he doesn't know sign language.

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What's your guys names?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Certainly not to have its motives questioned!

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Oh my God, my friend just got hit by a truck. Lets go get ice cream

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Yo mama so ugly she's ridiculed daily and has frequent suicidal thoughts.

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Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

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I love Ciara!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops