A women leaves the kitchen.

When the mom came home from work, she was very tired. Her son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She says sure and makes one for him. The boy was very happy and ate his sandwich. I was actually lying above. The mom was actually killed by three men in hoodies that were hiding in her backyard. The came inside and also murdered the boy. Worst of all the killers took all of the food and the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat, Guess it doesn't matter since he is gone...

(insert antijoke here

I called your friend gay and he hit me with his fist because he was angry at me for using gay in a derogatory way.

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Why was the mother sad? Because she had just watched her beloved baby get shoved in a blender.

Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

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Why was Adolf Hitler such a bad man? Because he never kissed his wife goodbye.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing...he found it.

How did the blind dyslexic boy find his way out of the cornfield? -He drew backwords numbers and letters in the dirt

Q:How do you know if you have a big enough oven? A: If the jew fits

A guy walks into a bar and hears a someone crying. He asks the bartender who is crying and the bartender says "It's my goat. He's been crying since Tuesday, I'm giving a $500 reward to whoever can make him stop." So the man walks to the back and whispers something to the goat's ear and suddenly the goat starts laughing. The bartender was so amazed at what happened and says "Wow, thank you kind sir! Here's your reward money." and the man takes the money and leaves. The next day the man returns to the bar and the bartender says "Hey, ever since you made my goat laugh he hasn't stopped. He's been driving me nuts. I'll give you another $500 to make him stop." So again, the man goes to the back of the bar and whispers to the the goats ear. Suddenly, the goat start crying again. The bartender can't believe it. He asks "How in the world did you do that? What did you say to my goat?" The man says "Well the first time I saw your goat I told him a joke." "Okay, that explains why he kept laughing..." the bartender asks "Now, what did you say to make him cry?" The man replies "I told him..." Suddenly the goat escapes and goes completely crazy and kills everybody in the bar with his horns. Till this day no one knows what the man said to the goat.

What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo. Moral: Cuckoo!

What do joe greene and joe biden have in common? Their first name

In Soviet Russia, joke tells YOU! ...because that is the syntax of the language.

Whats the difference between a person with cancer and breakfast? Breakfast is important

What do you call one black guy surrounded by eleven white guys? Wayne Simmonds

Why does Garrett have a small penis? He is not old enough to buy extenze.

this last joke was a correction to the other one

For anti-joke.com, there should be a section called "Hot" that shows new jokes which are given 5 thumbs up or up. This way we would get new jokes on the popular section instead of having the same ones for a very long time. I know this isn't a joke, but thumbs up if you agree.

asd

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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