Why was Little Billy sad? Because he got shot.

A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

what do you call a little girl next to a mexican? a rape victim.

(kid is eating a round fruit) friend: Get me an apple too. Kid: I wish I could The kids friend later realizes that his friend was actually eating a peach.

Why did my bed broke? Becaus i had sex with your mom!

How did the blind man know when to open his parachute when he went skydiving? The leash went slack.

How do you stop a baby from crying? Douse it in gas and throw it in a fire

Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

A child wasn't wearing knee pads when he was skateboarding. He proceeded to fall of his board and break his arm

What happens when you take a break from reality? Nothing, it's impossible, unless you live in a virtual world.

why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

How did the blond become a pilot? By attending flight school, graduating, applying to an airline to which she subsequently was hired to, taking frequent training courses, and beginning work.

What happened to the man who lost his job? He couldn't support his family so they all became homeless and eventually died of starvation.

Hello.

A:Will you be my valentine? B:No

What do you do when a blond ask you a question? Answer politely and thank her for her wonderful question.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What does a Chinese girl get for Christmas? New parents...

What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

The Princess is in another castle

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

A young boy walks into a bar and asks for directions or a map. The bartender takes him into a backroom and gives him a map he just happened to have. The boy continues on his way and the bartender is happy that he did a good deed.

A man walks into a Library and asks for a book on suicide. The Librarian says: "Do you have a library card?" The man says no and applies for one.

You know what rhymes with school? Hell.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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