How do you stop a black man from spitting? People of all races and colours are quite within their right to spit on their own property whenever they wish. However if anyone spits on or near you, you could report him to the police, but don't expect to be taken seriously.

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A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to prom. First he goes to get a tux but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he hast to get some flowers so he goes to a florist and there is a huge flower line there. It takes forever but he gets the flowers. Next he heads to get a limo, unfortunately there is a long limo line at the rental office and it takes a long time but he gets the job done. Finally the day of the prom comes and the two are dancing happily and are having a good time. When the song is over she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there is no punchline.

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Why did Stephen get an A on his test? He held his teacher at gunpoint and forced her to give him a good grade despite the fact he got an F.

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how do you get a black guy out of a tree? ask himnicely and if he doesn't promptly call the fire department

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A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

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Why Americans are so bad at League of Legends? Because they can't defend their towers.

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Your moms so poor that when she went to buy a bag of chips, she couldn't buy the bag of chips, because she didn't have enough money to buy the bag of chips

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What do you call a car with a sunroof? A car.

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Why did the black man walk across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

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Your social life

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yo momma so fat i abuse my wife

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A black man walks into a bar. He is then beaten upon and hung, as this is the 50s.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because I pushed him.

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What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

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What's funnier than one anti- joke? Two anti- jokes.

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Guy finds lamp in the desert and rubs it three times. No genie appears because there's no such thing as magic.

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You might be a redneck if you are from a rural area and act as such.

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A man went skydiving and tragically died.

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What did the blind boy get for Christmas? The same toys from last year.

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Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?

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If monkeys ate trees, than what would trees be made out of? No one knows because that will never happen.

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A cat starts grooming itself How many sprinkles does it take to cover the moon Cabinet because whales live in water

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Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

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an alien is walking down the street he can't breathe our air and quickly suffocates and dies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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