Once upon a time there was a king who had a daughter. She eventually grew up and contracted aids got run over by a bus and shit her pants..

Whats green and has 4 wheels? A green car.

What did one alligator say to the other alligator? Ear

What did Death say to Life? Go die.

What do you get if you cross a river with a cat? Wet.

What's black and has a beary taste? A black bear.

A horse walks into a bar, the barman says why the long face, the horse says, my dad died this morning.

Whats worse than scraping your elbow and knee? Beheading and disembowlment.

"i see", said the blind man ... ...to his deaf wife... ...while his crippled children jumped for joy....

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Oh wait i screwed up, Because of u

Why are female badgers more attracted to the smell of cheese than male badgers? I don't know. Ask Bill Snodgrass

A man went to the doctor with a strange complaint. "Well it's like this Doc, when I drive to work in the morning through the country lanes I start to sing 'The green green grass of home'. If I see a cat then it's 'What's new, pussy cat?'. It's so embarrassing, even when I'm asleep and dreaming, I still keep singing. Last night, it was 'Delilah', and my wife was not amused!" "Yes, it would apear that you have the early symptoms of Tom Jones syndrome." "Well I've never heard of that, is it common?" asked the man. "Yes," replied the doctor, "It is very uncommon."

5 Jewish men walk into a bar and are expected to be treated nicely

Dude, i know this guy, who knew this guy named Ben, who knew this guy named Valen, who knew this guy named Chad and he said.... Ben's Dead.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and deaf, so it wold be near impossible for her to do so without seriously injuring herself or another human being.

There was three women stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

Q: What did Batman say when Robin was in the Batmobile? A: Robin, get out of the Batmobile.

You're pretty... PRETTY UGLY

What did the chocolate milk say? Yoo-hoo.

What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

How did the man open the car? He opened in.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...