what color is blue? green

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your momma so fat, that she secretly crys every night, because she is so self concious about her weight. and has to talk to a therapist because shes bolemic and has suicidal thoughts, because she cant stand the way she looks

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Why the long face? My face isn't long, it's the same shape as everyone else, retard. I meant why are you sad. I'm not sad.

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What do you call a dead cow? Dead Meat.

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Guess what! what haha u listened to me

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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how do you confuse a blonde? shes already confused Leave.Her.Alone.

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What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

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What do you call a truck full of dead babies? Not enough.

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Why did the man scream? He got his dick caught. In the zipper.

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Fact: Nine out of ten Americans believe that out of ten people one will always disagree with the other nine.

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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how do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family

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what do you call 4 black people pushing a car uphill? unfortunate

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What looks like donuts but stinks of shit. Sean Big Macs socks

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Roses are black. Violets black. Guns are black. My van is black.

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Roses are red violets are blue... Only not really. Actually light is reflected off them and these colors show up soo....

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What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

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I love alchohol!

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Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one with a dream.

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Chuck Norris once starred in a movie with Bruce Lee.

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a black man pays his child support

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What has eight wheels and cost more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a lightbulb? Because they're so darn stupid!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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