Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's a woman.

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Why did the man give money to a drug dealer? He lost a bet.

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Clyde: Hey John! :D John: Hey clyde! :D Clyde: :D! John: :D! Clyde: :D, :), :|, :(, D'X John: ? hey man, are you ok? Wtf is going on with you? Clyde: Man, it's not me... :'(... It's you... It's your... Your... John: My what? Clyde: YOUR FACE!!!! D'X

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A guy walks into a bar and orders 4 shots. The bartender promptly pulls out a gun and shoots him 4 times.

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Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

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Knock knock who's there? Hi! where from the church of latter day saints!

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What's the difference between a Gay Man and a Straight Woman? Anatomy.

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Kenneth kaniff takes his hat off then he meets cosmic panda with kevin the zebra because chuck norris ate a chili pepper.

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Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

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What do you do when you're surrounded by 15 vampires and 15 werewolves? Stop pretending.

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Today I looked at a clock and realized that I was late.

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What did the sick kid get for cancer? Christmas

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What do you call a black man with a PhD and loving family? A nigger

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why the f*** do so many people ask this question?

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A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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What word starts with N and ends with R that you never want to call a black person? Neighbor.

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What did the vapyre eat for dinner? Nothing, they dont exist.

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What Did Sally Get For Christmas? A Bicycle

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What do you call a Black man sweeping the floor? A janitor.

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What did the boy with no mom get for Christmas? He was beaten by his drunken and abusive father.

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How do you get a nun pregnant? Artificial insemination.

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What did the deaf person see? He was blind too, so he didn't see anything.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops