KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called anti joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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What do you call a man with a horse? A man

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Why did the man wipe his bum with a sweat-shirt? Because they were all out of toilet paper

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Whats black, white, and red all over? Hot sauce on a checkerboard.

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Jimmy wanted a bike for Christmas He got cancer instead.

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What's white and hides behind a tree? Shy milk.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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Knock knock who's threre me, I kill you

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What shoots rockets but is not classed as a deadly weapon? A toy rocket launcher, I lied about the rockets.

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Q)A man and a women are hiking on a mountain trail. A bear appears. What do they do? A) Die.

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What happened to the turtle that was on land Dead

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When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

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Your dad is so gay, he does not have a girlfriend.

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What happended to the family in the hurricane? They died stupid

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Why was the blond looking at the orange juice box? Because she was reading the nutritional content of orange juice.

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someone called a frog a frog

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On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... Nothing, because I'm single.

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A. Do you know what they call Bing Crosby in Sweden? B. No. A. Bing Crosby.

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Why did the poorly educated man get fired from the M&M factory? He changed the M's to W's!

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Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? You don't. You just shut up and listen.

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How can you tell if an elephant has been in your fridge? Broken fridge.

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Whats sad about a black man killing himself? That shaft DVD that he rented will probably be late now.

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i'm on the sea food diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Whats Brown and sticky... Shit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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