What did the policeman say to the man robbing the bar? Stealing is wrong. Then the police read the man his Miranda laws.

What kind of a prediction is THAT?

Q:Howd the blind kid find his way home? A:He didnt, he got lost and died of starvation.

What did one bunny rabbit say to the other bunny rabbit? I'm a bunny rabbit!

How many cows say moo? All of them

What is orange and smells like oranges? Oranges.

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

#IHateHashtags

di you hear about the man that got his whole left side cut off? no well he died

Mexicans are inferior because! BEECUZ! Listen buddy, to be honest, I get girls every now and then because I am what they all want me to be, myself. You are a great friend as far as I am concerned, and I care a lot about you considering I saw you once like... 13 years ago, but I do not spend an entire night chatting with someone on horsehead network out of all things unless that person means a lot more than sex for me... Hell, if I did not feel that nice about you, I would not even have wanted to, and that sounds really awkward for a guy like me to say, believe me, you wont be losing a friend. AS LONG AS YOU KEEP GIVING IT TO ME! I am joking, but this is who I am (sadly) I have many female friends, and yeah well, some I well you know, I am just not the kind of guy that listens to girls sob stories, and pretend to be their gay best friend, while I watch someone bad ass come and bang her... Nah, I am more like that bad ass banger, except I dont break girls hearts afterwards. Seriously, I am really fond of you, to the point where I will say something guys mostly do not say: If you are feeling pressured into stuff, then dont do it, you wont be losing a friend, I wanna spend an intimate night with you (day, shower, on the breakfast table all that) but thats because I really like you, we have built some intimacy in pretty short time if you ask my opinion... See? Now I am being honest and leaving myself vulnerable, and I do that because I honestly care about you.

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

Why did the kid fall? He got pushed off of a building

A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

What happened when the boy fell off of the bridge? He died

The

Why did Willy kill the black man? Because not.

what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

A guy walks into a bar. The bartneder says, "Wow, buddy, you look awful. What's wrong?" The guy responds, "My life is a joke."

What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

Why did the black man get kicked out of his hotel room? He did't pay and was in debt so they couldn't allow him to stay.

Q. How many people use MySpace? A. Pfft who uses MySpace

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well you should really try some.

A bear walked into a bar, unfortunately there were no survivors.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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