we should name the next hurricane alex rodriguez so it dosent hit any thing

Q. How do you stop a clown from smiling? A. You hit it in the face with an axe.

Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

Why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off. haha its funny

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Regardless of the number of dead babies present, painting a house will require at least one living baby.

A kid walks into a bar, everyone fled the bar because they were all afraid of goats

Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the nazis we have reason to suspect that you are harboring illegal jewish fugitives and would like to check your house if it isn't too much trouble on your part.

My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

Why did the white kids accept Morgan Freeman as a kid? All of his school-mates looked up to him

what has hair? Organisms, or at least most do.

SC Johnson a Family Company

Winking at old people

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

What do you call a beagle and an eagle mixed together? A beagle.

A guy walks into a doughnut shop and says "I'll have a small coffee and a doughnut." The shop keeper says, "I'm sorry we ran out of coffee." The guy says, "All right I'll just have coffee than"

Why did the man walk into a bar? Coz he felt like it.

chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

What does a person that is fasting get for Christmas? Food.

Why did the dog start barking? Because it was a dog.

pants on the ground pants on the ground lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground

Mary had a little lamb, the doctor fainted.

What is the difference between a mustache, and a pile of dead babies? Mustaches disgust me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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