Why is it bad to smoke in a public place? Because secondhand smoke may cause lung cancer.

why did the chicken cross the road? IDGAC

Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

Q. How do you break into a store that's closed? A. You walk in, I was lying about it being closed.

What is Lady Gaga's real name? Who the crap knows?

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are you But the roses have wiltered The violets are dead The sugar bowl is empty And so is your head

whats better then 10 babies nailed to 1 tree... 1 baby nailed to 10 trees!

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A Stick!

A 10 year old underpriveledged boy goes to the second mile camp and meets his new counselor: Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. The two bond very much and talk a lot. Sandusky invites the boy back to the locker room to shower because the boy got muddy. The boy takes a shower, gets clean, and goes back to his cabin. The boy has a great time at the camp and goes home.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was stuck in its coop on the farm. Also, chickens aren't sentient, so they can't reason the same way we do.

whats green and has wheels grass and i lied about the wheels

Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

knock knock. Who's There? Cancer.

One dark, stormy night, there was a man, limping slowly down the road. He looked across the road and noticed a little girl on a park bench. He carefully moved around behind , creeped up, and slowly tapped her on the shoulder. I tap 2 tap 3 tap The little girl slowly turned her head, and as she did, the man uttered 3 sentences.... "Would you mind helping me get back to my apartment, my hand was cut off in the war, while I was serving my country, which is why I have a hook as opposed to a hand. I was heading back to my apartment to greet my wife and 2 little children, since I just got back from a long day's work at the soup kitchen, helping those in need, and I sprained my ankle. By the way, my name I John Thompson."

What did Katniss say to her sister? hi

Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

A Jew, A black, and a Hispanic jump off a building. Who hits the ground first? Who cares.

What did the transvestite hooker say when he/she saw a robot fighting a dinosaur? That's strange.

Q:what is the most annoying word that means nothing? A:every word has a meaning your question is invalid. ~Phish <3

What do you call someone who thinks they're funny but in reality isn't? Adam chapali Knock knock Who's there? NOT adam chapali

What did the fish say after he swam into a wall? Dam

What's the difference between a North Korean and a South Korean? Nothing, they're both chinese.

-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Carl -Carl wh-wait... carl...CARL OH MY GOD!!!! WE ALL THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD ,CARL!!!! Where have you been? Oh my god... Mom's DEAD! When we all thought you were dead she hung herself! IT'S YOUR FAULT SHE'S DEAD, CARL! YOUR FAULT!!!!!! YOU ARE AN UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT CARL! YOU KNOW THAT? I hope you burn in hell.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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