why did the boy have to go to the dentist he was hit by a brick

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did little susie fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock who's there? not susie

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did one cat say to the other cat? --------- Meow --------- What's pink and fluffy? --------- Pink fluff --------- What's green and yellow? --------- Grass. I lied about the yellow part.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

knock knock. who's there? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are green I'm bipolar

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q-How do you kill an elephant? A- An elephant gun Q- How do you kill a blue elephant? A- A blue elephant gun Q- How do you kill a red elephant? A- Strangle it until it turns blue then use a blue elephant gune Q- How do you kill a purple elephant? A- Don't be ridiculous purple elephants don't exist

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Why did they bury the fireman on the east side of the green grassy hill, to the left of the old well, underneath the huge apple tree? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Part 1 - Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms! Part 2 - Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzy!

thumb_up thumb_down +123

Why was Jenny walking home alone from school? Because three years ago her parents were murdered brutally by a drug dealer and social services haven't yet realised that Jenny is still living in the empty house.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How many TV shows are there? A lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did the long term smoker suddenly stop smoking? Because he had a heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the black guy get on the SATs? Who knows, that isn't a specific person

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A man fell off a cliff... He died a vicious death.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why is Diarreah genetic? It runs in your genes.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A: u wanna die B: that is a stupid question because unless u are suicidal u will not, retorical or not A: i do wanna die B: u should get some help u freak person a never did get help, while walking to a certivied psychiatrict evaluater he got hit by a truck. his body can be found at the intersection of church and flatbush, brooklyn. JK he got shot, he was in brookly, duh.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Humpty Dumpty didn't fall I pushed him

thumb_up thumb_down +4

smug face >:}

thumb_up thumb_down -185

Two girls are sitting quietly.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

One time at band camp.............tha'ts it........

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Scenario - Two astronauts are kayaking down the Sahara dessert. Question - How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse? Answer - Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Your muffins smell good! Oh you is just nasty.

thumb_up thumb_down -60

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops