Why couldn't the women cook for her family She had no arms, therefore incapable of preforming the task.

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares i dying from cancer

Hey Jay, did you here the one about the 3 hookers at the bar? Jay didn't reply because he was deaf

Roses are red my shirt is blue don't take my money, their not for u -_-

Oh," the boy says. "Well BUENOS DIAS to you too!!!

Knock knock. *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

Roses are Red Violets are Black Why is your chest As flat as your back

whats the same about a spider and a grape? they both have eight legs, except for the grape.

What do Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder have in common? They're both well known figures who have inspired many.

A Mime travels to Africa for a vacation. He meets a Zebra in his travels and the Zebra says "Hey we both are wearing black and white stripes!" The Mime did not understand the Zebra because he cannot talk his language so he continues on with his vacation.

So many dudes win with your mom who even knows if i'm your father!!

Q: A black man is walking down the street with a television, where did he just come from? A: Best Buy, he just got a bonus, and wanted to reward himself.

split your ass cheek

Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To see if it could.

Went to a zoo there was a asian shouting GOOZILLA at the reptile house I said no 2 frickly pickles please He said helwo I'm wo pong th pow wice to weet you I said does he come with subtitles Old priest said no the said hello little boy want a mint I said oh thanks I'm not a boy I'm 19 Old priest said no no you can't have one of my special mints I said wait those mints have R's on them are the rainbow mints Old priest no there raspberry I said ok don't be a stranger Old priest said oh I will I said wait your THE PRIEST He said oh I'm just a priest looking for little boys I said no your dead now jumped 30 feet in the air sat on a bird dove into him bird went threw him we made a team promised to clean the world of evil only to find out that we killed the mother of all priest Bird said tweak tweak I said yeah let's hunt them all down Shall the be a part 2 you decide

A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

what do babies and prostitutes have in common they will both cry if you hit them with a brick

Why did the chicken cross the road? It tried to to commit suicide.

Do you like cats? You gotta be kitten me.

Why did the black man rob the store? Because he was hard on money for a reason not associated with race or stereotypes whatsoever.

Whats the difference between a hoover and a harley? one is a vacuum, and the other is a motorcycle.

What was the pirates grade? Arrr That isn't a valid grade

What's red and screams? A peeled baby in a bag of salt.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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