Why does Toby suck! Because he sucks!

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I was walking down the street and a guy fell down right next to me. He woke up a hour later and asked "what smells like year old cat pee?" I said "year old cat pee retard honestly." Then he died. Morale don't ask questions you don't want to know the answers to.

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How do black people get rich? They collect welfare checks.

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What did Osama bin Laden say to the Navy SEALS? Nothing. There was insufficient time to hold a conversation before they shot him in the face.

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Why is the sky blue? You like men.

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What did Helen Keller do when she found a dead body? Nothing.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Why did the man leave anti-joke.com? Because he realized that it was time for dinner and the ham was burning.

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What's so good about being Swiss? Well.... The flag's a big plus

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What do you call two men kissing? Gay.

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Where do the biggest potatoes grow? the ground.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Ham and Cheese!

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How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it. Except that didn't work for the boy. He also lost his ice cream.

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whats hard long and you put it in your mouth everyday a toothbrush

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven beat and raped Six when he was child multiple times, and Seven threatened to kill Six if he told anyone.

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What's worse then forced to eat frog legs? Xbox one

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how do you kill chuck norris. you don't

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How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

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Asked by the court barber how he wanted his hair cut, the king replied: ‘In silence.

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What do you call a blonde with a broken arm? A cripple.

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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Why did the blond woman sell her water skis? She was in a horrible accident and will never walk again.

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Q: What's the difference between a black man from San Diego and a white man from Miami? A: They live in different cities, and in the presidential election, the black man voted for Obama and the white man voted for McCain

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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