How many Japanese people does it take to make a whirlpool? - None, because they're all dead.

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Q. Did you hear about the gay guy that's on the patch? A. yeah, that's a really big step, quitting smoking is tough

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Why did the Cookie Monster go to the Doctor? Because He had an inoperable tumor in his lower intestinal tract.

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How do you convince a therapist that he is crazy? Hide in a fortress made of sporks wearing nothing but a belt, and start hissing and throwing paint at him repeatedly.

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What's the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer nuts are $1.50 and deer nuts are under a buck.

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Why did the blonde jump over the glass wall? To see what was on the other side.

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How can you know your roommate is gay? His dick has the taste of shit

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What does an Israeli gun sound like? Jew, jew, jew, jew, jew

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

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What black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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whats red and bad for your teeth... A brick.

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You might be a redneck if you spent all day in the sun without sunscreen.

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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Q: What do you do when your friend tells you he murdered someone? A: Call the police.

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Q. what did the kid say to his foreign language teacher about the test? A: i dont understand this test, its like in a complete different language

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A Priest a Rabbi and a duck walk into a bar. The rest of the patrons continue to drink until the situation seems less strange.

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What do you get if you cross a bulldog with a schitzu? A half breed prone to allergies and breathing problems.

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he fell off a cliff

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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James walks into a room he then leaves as the room is full of hot women but he does not find them attractive as he has a girlfriend and is also bisexual.

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Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England? A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to buy plus size clothes because small size clothes would be inappropriate for her to wear.

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What is worse-losing your phone or failing school? Apartheid

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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