Why don't mummies take vacations? They're dead.

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A man is training his dog. He tells the dog to sit. The dog sits. "Good boy!" said the man. The dog did not thank the man for the compliment because dogs cannot speak.

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What's worse than eating spinach? Dying.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? No Ok

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I'm funnY!!! Haha pënis

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A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

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What other than water contains H2O? The condensation reaction between two alpha glucose molecules to form Maltose.

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Someone threw a hippo at the pilot.

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What is the meaning of life? 42

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snooki from jersey shore walks into a bar and gets arrested.

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A man goes into a bar. He leaves drunk and beats his wife to death and burns the house and kids.

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

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What do two zebras look like next to each other? Two zebras

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What do watermelons taste like? Sand.

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What would happen if you put a marshmellow in a tractor Because 7, 8, 9

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An American man stopped me the other day and asked for the time, I looked at my watch and said: 5 o'clock.

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wnna here a joke, toby limbers playing basketball

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

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When life gives you gators, make Gatorade.

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When the clock strikes the bell at elephantasourous during my erectionn i screw myself CC

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Who's white and tries his best? Steve Nash

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I spilled spot remover on my dog. Needless to say he received a bath that night.

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How do u tourcheer a fat kid? Make him chase a dounout

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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