Why did the baby cry? His dad was holding him upside down over a fire.

That's what he said.

Hey Patrick Yeah? I found something funnier then 24 Give it to me buddy 25

How do you put a baby in a blender? Feet first, so you can see its expression. How do you get a baby out of a blender? With chips.

why did the chicken cross the road? because colonel sanders was chasing it with an axe

A businessman notices an attractive woman sitting at the end of the bar so he buys her a drink. She kindly accepts and spends a few minutes making pleasant conversation with him. When she's finished with her drink, she promptly begins to flirt with another man at the bar who's not twenty years older than her and horribly out of shape. The middle-aged businessman, realizing his own mortality, proceeds to spend the rest of the evening drinking himself into vortex of loneliness.

It's Christmas in Iraq. Merry Christmas

If an atom bomb falls in a town, does it make a sound? Not to most people, as they would be killed in a massive catastrophe that will be etched into their ancestors minds for years to come, not to mention radiation poisoning and deformation.

whats made of wood and floats? everything made of wood floats

What did grandma receive for her 75th birthday? Alzheimer's.

Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road? He wasn't, and in fact was entirely unaware that said road existed given the fact that he was deceased; and therefore lacked any sensory organs and motor functions associated with crossing roads.

Why did the kid poo his pants? Because he was Matt Daly

Whay was 6 afraid of 7? 7 had an extra penis

What did obama say to the united states of america YES WE CAN

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

why did the black guy talk to the monkey? they were in the same cage.

whats the difference between a white jew and a black jew the black jew is treated poorly and is sent to the back of the gas chamber

Why did Martin have to retake his exams? Because Martin is a right royal Dumbass.

You idiot.

Smelly Indians.

Why is Lewis hayphore gay Answer = because he sucked hos brother off #Cameron Hayphore

Two clowns are walking down the street The first says, "Whats better sunshine or rainbows?" The second says nothing, then casually picks up a brick and beats the other clown to death.

a tiger swims into the indian ocen and eats a tuna. the tiger shortly dies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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