What did the cat say to the dog? - meow!

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What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

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There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

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How do you hook up with a really hot chick? This website is intended for Anti-Jokes, Not Dating Advice.

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Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? All of it.

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Why did the man staple his own scrotum to his left thigh? He didn't. His friends did.

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Ok so a black guy is packing his bags for college and then......... wait a minute?

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wat did the candle say to the lighter? nothing candles cant speak because they are inamimate objects, even so i think a candle would just scream anyway, would you buy a screaming candle?

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what is a present you would give a werewolves? I said... OBAMA!!! tee hee

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What do you do when a burglar breaks into your house and tries to kill and rape you and you family? Nothing, he as an AK-47 and shoots you all dead and then has sex with your corpses.

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What's the difference between 10 dead baby's and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

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A negro named Kanye walks into a Tavern... He's stoned to death.

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What drops its lunch every day? Yo mom

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Some blind tall guy asked a rich dude about time when the rich dude looked at his klock he remembred many things in his ugly terrible life so he said to the blind guy : its 5PM

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why did every one in the world die? a Train pooped it's pants.

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Hmmm, how would Sherlock Holmes solve a crime?... Oh wait. He doesn't exist.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The gay man came out of the closet.....Not that he wanted the world to know about his alternative lifestyle but because he is fairly wealthy and keeps his trousers on hangers in the rear of his walk in closet.

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Knock Knock? Who's There? Not a Jehovah's Witness, let me in!

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How can you tell if a calendar is popular? From stock order lists and also from accounts records.

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Why did the guy lose the race? Because he had explosive diarrhea

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Why was the black man eating fried chicken? He was on death row and it was his last meal request..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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