I scream, you scream, we all scream when hit by an ice cream truck

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what is the vent wound on the ladies that can never heal???

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

how do u know when your in west virginia? when the houses have more wheels than the cars

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What do old people really like? Anal sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

¿Por qué seis de los siete miedo? ¡Porque siete ocho nueve!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happened when the kid tried to hang himself? He was overweight, so the ceiling fan that the rope was tied to fell out of the ceiling. When he explained this to his drunk mother when she got home, she reinforced the fact that he was overweight (his low self esteem was the root of his depression) and beat him. The next day, he just chugged antifreeze. This isn't a true story. Just calm down.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why was the guy with six fingers called John? His name was John.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why Did The Girl Fall Off The Swing. IDK maybe she fell asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

You know what's a real drag? A club foot

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what did batman say to robyn before he got in the car?... "get in the car"

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what is worse than finding a worm in your apple being tricked by your best friend to mule drugs over the boarder and then imprisoned in a Vietnamese jail, where you will most likely will be traded for sex and other horrid act of sodomy, only to escape and work as a sex slave to earn your way home, because that is the life you know now there is no way out you will die here.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did I get raped

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why did the man blink because i put a gun to his head.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

how does hitler drink soup ? with a spoon

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says" why the long face". The horse, unable to comprehend English just shits on the floor and leaves

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's worse than rain on your birthday? Dying

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Knock knock GET OUTTA HERE! Jesus Christ dude I just came for some eggs!....

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas? Because his parents are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q:When a T- Rex walks into your house what does it mean? A: Your on pot, T-rex's are extinct

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

This anti-joke below is hilarious.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops