What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did the cute baby start crying?? because its feet were eaten by rats.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

I got a joke for ya. George W. Bush was our president. He is a joke, but no one is laughing.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Greg told a joke. It wasnt funny...

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why are Jews so tight with there money? They want to be finanically stable and provide a future for their familys.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

A black man walks into a Subway restaurant, and goes up to the counter. The cashier already knows that he's going to order the chicken, but how does he know? Because the black man is a regular, and orders the same thing every time.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's red and smells like a rose? Bumble-bees licking honey off of a stick.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is the opposite of pro? Con right? So what's the opposite of progress? Congress

thumb_up thumb_down -38

hey

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats white and cant jump? A refridgerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why do mexicans have so many children??? Because condoms resemble skinny balloons.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

In Soviet Russia it is normally colder than america and most people speak russian.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Q: Why was the cook put in jail. A: He has killed 2 people and robbed several stores

thumb_up thumb_down -2

1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into a bar, then he realized he didn't have any money, so he walked out.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

I wonder if God looks at the Earth all these years later and thinks, Man, I really went overboard with the water, didn't I?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What does Batman say to scare Robin? Don't make me get the bat!

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the black man jump out of the plane? He was going on a parachute dive with his friend.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock Knock. Whose there? Bond. Bond who? James Bond. na-na NA NA na-na na

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happened to the blind boy? He went deaf.. helen kellered....

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Ow, there's an arrow in my knee!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

So a black guy goes to college and doesn't steal anything or rape anyone. He has a 4.0 GPA and is one of the smartest students at Harvard University.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops