Roses are black Violets are black Im Helen Keller WWWHHAATTTTT!?!?

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Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

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Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have cancer."

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Best reaction to Anti-humor joke me: whats green and has wheels Friend: idk Me: Grass i lied about the wheels Friend:wow dick

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Your mother is so fat that people make rude comments about her behind her back, but they shouldn't because she's a really nice lady.

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for keeps?

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Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

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Q.What's green and smells like grass??? A. Grass

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Q:Why was the blond so dumb A: She had downsidrome

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knock knock who's there boo Jenny had a heart attack due to the scare, she was taken to hospital and died

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he had more fat than average, so he was very buoyant

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If you know someone with the last name Schmidt. ALWAYS ask him to take a Schmidt on your chest

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Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

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Seriously, all your new jokes are shit. They are either repeats of stuff previously on the site or they are just so unfunny you'd struggle to get a sympathy laugh from your mother. Please actually take the time to think of something worth submitting or do not submit at all. We know people with no arms can't knock on doors enough now, and many things are better than the holocaust. Do something new!

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When you try to go to anti-joke.com but get redirected to Horsehead Network...

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

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Where did the kittens go on their class filed trip? Nowhere, animals are not permitted to enter a museum unless they are eye seeing dogs helping a person who lacks vision.

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Rachel: Wanna hear a conundrum? Robby: Sure! Racheal: Vampire Value card.

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What's big, white, and red all over? A refrigerator that happened to fall on a small child.

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Is that a gun? Or are you forcing your boner into my back? Or is it something completely different that shares the physical characteristics of guns and boners?

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Isn't it funny that we think it's totally normal for females to not have penises but for literally EVERY OTHER group of people, it's weird and not ok double standard?

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Who hacks darts? • Jack Nolan aka Bowlbot 300 J-Bowls

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What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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