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Why did the world end? Because of Jim Layhey's whispering winds of shit.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

whats black and doesnt work? a broken black toaster

What do you get when you cross a rabbit and a pair of scissors? Nothing. That's not possible with current technology.

Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? People cross roads all the time, each for their own personal reasons. Questioning their motives is generally accepted as being unnecessary, as it is a relatively safe action as log as one is careful and heeds the laws of traffic.

Why did the little girl stop riding her bike? She was hit by a car.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

. HAHAHAHA I have control of you I don't enjoy that picture.

Dont be silly, you know that everything is relative, and that relativity is as unlimited as the subconscious mind, give me ten more minutes, and I can hypnotize you in five minutes in order to see life in slow motion yourself for as long as you feel like. Just dont expect your body to adjust like mine, meaning that if you try to run, your brain will use its old habits while your perception is used to the slow ones... In other words, you will end up on the floor or smacking into a wall.

How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None we have mexicans for that

Want to know how the dyslexic man with no left arm and no left leg? All left

Are you thinking Arby's? No. My grandmother died of tuberculosis and it's troubling me.

In Soviet Russia, the political system was very different than it is today.

What comes after 69? Mouthwash

lol

What does an elephant and a plum have in common? They are both purple... except for the elephant

How do you teach a kid to ski you strap it to the back of a polar bear

What's worse than loosing your pen? Getting raped by a pedophile.

A hispanic lesbian couple accidentally walk into a country western themed bar. And leave immediately as a bar is no place for their 2 year old son.

A man calls 911 911: hello? Man: sorry wrong number.

Why was Timmy so unpopular at school? Because he caught aids of his pet rock

Haikus are easy They are simpler than you think Just don't run out of...

Q: What do you call a man driving a van with a bunch of stuff in the back that doesn't belong to him? A: A delivery man

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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