Your mother is a man.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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I just witnessed a horrible accident today! It was like a silent movie, but with SOUND!!!!

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Why did Joe wake up screaming? Because his wife cut off his penis.

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What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One you can smash with a hammer and the other is just a watermelon.

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What happens when you eat all the strawberries? They are GONE...

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being held for random.

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I work for a Jewish Carpenter. He pays me minimum wage.

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Q: What did Michael Jackson do while he was preparing for his newest world tour? A: He died.

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If Donald Trump was in Game Of Thrones, he'd probably be a part of The Wall.

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What store adopted the dog ? The Pound

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Q: What did the dog say to the owner when he took him to the vet? A: Nothing. It's a dog. It can't talk.

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What's the difference between girl scouts and boy scouts? Girl scouts are usually females and boy scouts are usually males.

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What is makes you more happy to see than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed up as a clown.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall of the second time? I pushed her.

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person 1: i have a good knock knock joke person 2: ok what is it? person 1: say knock knock! person 2: knock knock person 1: trollollollollollollo

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How many nails does it take to build a house? As many as it takes to get the job done.

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What's long and sexy? The Eiffel Tower

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Quaint? Oh yeah? YOU ARE QUAINT! No seriously, whats that word all about.

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Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

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knock knock whos there boo boo who? stop crying its only me! its not you, my mom has cancer, my dad was killed in a car accident, my pregnant wife has been murdered, and my uncle touches me.

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Why was the man worried? because he had a shotgun up his ass

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how much c o c k could a n i g g e r lick if a f a g g o t licked a d i c k

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Why was the Chinese Man mistaken for the other Chinese Man? They were twins.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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