"I can sell this watch for $500 dollars on the black market!" Well, you could sell your liver for $500 dollars on the black market too.

roses are red violetes are blue you need to shut up or I will kill you

What's worse than being a Packer Fan? Walking around with cheese on your hea... oh, wait....

Why did the Chicken cross the road Because he was not happy with his life at a chicken due to the fact take he was going to get eaten by a black man so he hoped that if he crossed the ride and got hit by a car and die he would regenerate into a poisonous frog

An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a gin and tonic. The bartender gives him a sprite and charges him $12.

Why did the man get in a car accident? Because he was blind.

what did the man do when he fell off the top of a building? Nothing He DIED!!!!!!

What happened to Timmy went to get ice cream from the ice cream truck? He was raped and never seen again, his family now mourns there loss

What did one dog say to the other dog? Bark.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

A man walks into a bar... And orders a drink

Why did Tigger look into the toilet? He accidentally swallowed a dime the other day and wanted to keep an eye out for it.

wetly sucks dick just like teh boowb

How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

Knock knock. Who's there? To. To who? To whom.

What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

What's big, red and eats rocks? A big, red Rock-Eater

roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

How many wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None. They prefer digging burrows for hibernation.

What's black and dangerous? A fridge, I lied about the black part.

Hey you wanna hear a joke? Sure! Well first, do you want part of my sandwich? No thanks.........Are you going to tell your joke? Joke? Um sure. I didn't know I was telling one. Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have Alzheimer's. Would you like part of my sandwich?

What is worse then failing a test? Cancer

What is white and will kill you if it fell out of a tree? Charles Manson

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...