What is the difference between 1000 dead babies and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

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What did the boy find on his laptop? -Nothing, he comes from a broken home and can't afford one.

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VAGINA.

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Dick spice

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being disabled.

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What do flowers and people have in common? They both die.

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amy baked 35 sugar cookies and ate 25, what does she have now? diabetes.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a firefighter.

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why was the black man blind? because he was black.

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How do you stop a black kid from jumping around in your bedroom? Chuck him out of the house.

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What is the result of a couples' feud? 96.

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whats black with purple?nothing no animals or humans have anything like that

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Guess what? The Game.

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A guy reads the bible Another guy shouts "spoiler alert, the main character dies"

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A man with a mustache enters your parents home to tell them you were kidnapped and taken to the pier 1 hour away. They leave and he goes upstairs to rape you for 1 hour. Never trust people with mustaches.

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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Well, I'm naked so I'm going to go.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, Flappy Bird is no where near as annoying as you!

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What can eat, sleep, and reproduce? Not a rock, that's for sure.

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Why did the little kid use pillows at night? Because he was constipated.

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What's (333x4)-198+(456x100,432)-10+5? Bet ya said i don't know! I don't either.

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Why didn't the boy run the marathon? He was cripple.

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I died shortly after writing this.

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If Jimmy has 50 pieces of candy and eats 40 of them, what does he have now? Jimmy has diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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