Why did the chicken cross the road? Because having been born Chick L. Sanders only three years before, his dream (as advertised by his dear old mother, Mrs Sanders (who was suffering from a poor but luckily passing bout of measles)) was to make it in showbiz. He was a poor chick, Chick, growing up in Indianapolis (the chick kicking capital of the world) but he learned how to cope and how to toughen up -- this chick, Chick, kicked when ticked off. After reaching the dear young age of three, this chick (still Chick) headed west to make it to Los Angeles. He arrived in Iowa a couple of years later, having grown stubble and achieved chick puberty. In search of pressing and more immediate desires, he raped a duckling. Although he knew such a deed was morally polarizing, he kept it out of his mind until he received a telegram detailing that his mother (Mrs Sanders) had been killed by another bout of measles that did not pass and proved ultimately fatal. Overcome with grief and regret, he castrated himself and told himself to never again seek pleasures of the flesh. Because of this action, he became forever known as Chick the Dickless. He worked in Des Moines for a time, but knew he had to continue on his journey to achieve his dreams. Crossing the Missouri, he found himself embarrassingly in Kansas, a place he did not want to go and was famed for its stoning of anything castrated. He avoided Topeka and traveled through some hills before getting hit by a twister. Chick the Dickless twisted until Chick clicked that a kick and a lick to the prick would hick him from such a predicament. He eventually landed in New Mexico, on the border of the Rio Grande because he forgot chickens could fly if they were castrated. Chick the Dickless flicked through a prickly dictionary and found he was not in Kansas anymore. He continued his journey west, eventually finding himself in the Copper Canyon. It was blisteringly hot and in the heat he forgot his own last name. He did, however, remember his nickname; Dickless. So he created a new persona under that unforgiving sun, even if the name was nicked from his nickname; Chick Dickless. In the heat, he realized he had no use for his heavy feathers and so tore them off himself, making him look like a skinny prick. Name-nicked Chick Dickless skinny prick shortened the Dickless down to Dick, because syllables waste breath. Name-nicked Chick Dick skinny prick licked his heat-blasted limbs to recover energy, using the memory of his mother and sheer will power to get out of Arizona. He finally arrived in California, just mere miles from Los Angeles. But he eventually came to a road that split him from the City of Angels. Name-nicked Chick Dick (skinny prick, who-licked limbs, tornado hick) was sick of obstacles. But it was the last one... So why did the chicken cross the road? Ask Mr Sanders, you lucky bastard.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The Police The Police who? We're sorry Ma'am your son has died in a car accident... --------- Knock Knock! Who's there? Not your son

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Dead baby jokes aren't funny, dead babies are though.

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Man frantically runs into a bar, he suffers brain damage and cannot remember anything about his life. Though he tries to make everything go back to the way it once was, he and his wife grow distant and their family falls apart.

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A bear goes to target, soon after animal control came and put it in a nearby zoo

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Why did Johnny fall down? Because I threw tropical fruit at him.

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A boy asks a wolf, "whats the time mr wolf?" The wolf does not answer. Wolves possess neither watches, nor the neurone in their brain required to talk.

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There is a bus full of puppies and babies with a plane flying above it carrying 2 tons of explosives. The Bus arrives safely at its destination.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he knew that the neighbors wouldn't "touch him there"

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Why did the nerd cross the road?? BAZINGA!!!! xD

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Roses are red, violets are blue. This is a poem about flowers.

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Who enforces the law strongly and forces people to obey them? Terrorists that have seized control of a town.

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What would George Washington say if he were alive today? WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH THIS COUNTRY!

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2 nuns were in a bathtub. One says to the other "Could you pass me the soap please?" The other replies, "What do you think I am, a radio?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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A brick bent down to suck my flapjack, Then he got stuck, oh what the unpleasant, This angered the brick, he lay on the grass, he shoved a stick straight up his bellybutton.

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Q: How many vaginas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Just one.

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I knew a little girl once. She was ate before she was seven.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Adolf Hitler. Adolf Hitler, who? Be quiet and hand over your Jews!

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What did the framer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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A man walks into a bar, purchases a beer, and leaves.

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what does a granny look best in? 1950

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Why was the Jew evicted from his home? He forgot to pay the rent

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If i was given a penny every time i hear "It's not my fault". I will have the money equal to the nominal price multiplied by the count of times i heard that phrase.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops