What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

thumb_up thumb_down +7

hi patrick

thumb_up thumb_down -23

If you give a mouse a cookie... you're destroying their natural diet.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

You think I'm pretty without any makeup boy..... Let's bang.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a horny horse? A unicorn.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

The chicken crossed the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do fat kids and whales have in common? Ruth burden

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -133

What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's black, white, and red all over??? A penguin in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the duck cross the road? Because it was going to the destination he wanted to go to.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are red, Violets are violet,

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whats worse then getting robbed by a black man? -getting hit by a bus due to not having the needed currency to get a ride home

thumb_up thumb_down +14

A white guy drives to Home Depot in order to get supplies for remodeling his kitchen. He notices a few Mexicans standing around outside. He decides to go to to Lowe's instead.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

69!!! (its funny cause i made a referance to 69)

thumb_up thumb_down -6

who farted i did :]

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A man who can't spell walks into an Arab.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q: How do you win the tour defrance if you have one nut? A: Hard work and dedication.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's brown and sticky? Shit

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops