A bass player walks past a bar.......... "hey, it could happen"...

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Why did the chicken cross the road. ... So he could be hit by a car.

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Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all fall on a small boy below, putting him into a 20-year coma.

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A man walks into the local grocery store on his way to work. He stops by the pastry section to buy a bagel. As he is paying, the cashier says "and here's some blueberries, they're complimentary." The man looks at the blueberries expectantly. When they don't say anything he looks up, feeling foolish, pays for his bagel and heads off to work as a partner in a lawyer firm.

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A ghost walks into a bar. Nobody sees it because it is a supernatural entity.

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What did the American call the Arab? Nothing the American could not talk because he suffered from throat cancer because of the effects of 9/11 and thus causing his hatred towards Arabs and led to the Arabs death. Green

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? George. George Who? George Smith.

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How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

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Kony 2012

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Q.what is worse than finding a worm in your apple? A.finding two worms.

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If I have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, we both have the same monetary value.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he.

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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LET'S PLAY CARDS SHUFFLE THE DECK *person with a deck-patio* no please don't

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Your mom.

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Two fish are in a tank. It is an average sized tank designed to hold aquatic animals.

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- have you heard about the guy who got the left side off the body cut off? - no. - He died

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Barman: Why the long face? Horse: To support my twelve molars and twelve premolars which help me chew grass so I can swallow it properly.

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how many people with ADHD does it take to screw in a light bulb? wanna go ride bikes

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What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

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Q:What does a black guy say when you steal his fried chicken right in front of him? A:"please restrain from taking food that does not belong to you. If you had kindly asked i would have kindly given you some, and right in front of me too! In all my life I've never seen such rudeness and i grew up in the Bronx."

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Finding out that your girlfriend is really a drag queen and that that is why you have never had sex. -Harrison

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A guy walks into a bar and thinks of a superlative anti-joke. After having an enjoyable time at the bar he then promptly goes home and posts it for the world to see.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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