Whats whats black, yellow, wnd green all over? The Jamacain flag

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why was the man on the roof? he was about to commit suicide.

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Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: Hahahaha! I can't read.

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What do Ethiopians do at night? Starve.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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You ever hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither has she.

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Obama 2012

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A man walks into a bar, but it was a gay bar, and the man was a homosexual so he stayed and had fun then later that night he went home to his girlfriend

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Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Set a firework off on her face.

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How do you get a black man down from a tree? If the man cannot climb down himself, perhaps call the fire department.

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Why did the black guy buy watermelon? It was on sale.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They beat her mercilessly.

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This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

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Fun fact: Steel wool comes from the fleeces of iron sheep.

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What is computers and smells like thin and fragile? dyslexic nipples.

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what do you call a tall skiny kid with a very big ego autistic

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knock knock who's there? roses are red, violets are blue, i shit in a bag and now its in flames on your porch

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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Q. How do you know when an asian has robbed your house?? A. Like any other thief, most of your expensive belongings will be gone it depends on duration of robbing and their morality

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was playing Pokemon Go.

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What did one socially awkward kid say to another socially awkward kid? Nothing

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Q: what did the common cold say to the cough? A: you are SO annoying!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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