Whats brown and a fag? A bundle of sticks

what do JFK, plato, and a dead penguin have in common? theyre all dead.

Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

why did the black guy where orange shoes? Because he likes orange.

Why did the kids put pirahnas in Mr. Hermann's fish tank? So they could eat him.

why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

Q: Whats red and bad for your teeth? A: a brick

Holocaust jokes are not funny. And I don't see the humor behind them.

Whats eight feet tall, purple, smooth, delicious, uses proper grammar, and likes dolphins. I don't know.

Roses are red violets are blue I have AIDS go get checked

Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

what do you call a black man on a killing spree? whatever his xbox live gamertag is. that would probably be most appropriate

Nah Nero, nothing wrong here, I mean I am down to earth, you made me realize that, and sincerely you are my best friend, I mean I hang out with geeks all day, and yeah I might be a bit nerdy or even geeky myself, but not like this, I want to be more like you, spend time with you, not playing dungeon and dragons telling myself I am some warrior princess... I thought playing that crap was gonna get funnier but thats not true the least. What I am trying to say is that I look up to you, what you achieved, and still do, while if you look at me, I am literally several grades below you, so yeah, you are looking down at me. And yeah, I might be falling in love with you to be honest, but I know you have a wife and I am the jealous insecure kind, so I would not want to share you with anyone in fear of losing you if you where my husband, but I dont love you for what I want you to be, I love you for who you are. And yeah I know it must be awkward hearing me type my heart out here, but if you want to know me for who I truly am, as sincere as you are, you deserve it. And no, you are not blunt, you are what people would call "honest to a fault", and I adore that side of you, I mean if I want to hear what people think they want me to hear, I ask anyone else, but you, you are different, you are honest to death, and that makes me feel safe and trust you when you say things, I mean you are a free spirit, if you thought I was ugly you would have told me, and that would have been okay, if it where you actually. So I am sorry if I sound weird or desperate or something, its just whats inside of me right now.

knock knock, whos there? the repo man.

A polar bear and a seal are sitting on an ice floe. The polar bear looks at the seal and says, "RAWRRRRRRRRRGGG" and then kills and eats him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? ... it wanted to cross the road.

Q: Why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: What to year old WOULDN'T?

what do you call a gay guy in a sleeping bag? a fruit roll-up. GET IT? because gay guys like fruit roll-ups.

Q: What do you call men at sea? A: Sailors

A girl that had Malaria couldn't play with her friends, whys this? She died.

I wish you were never born. Me too. Then I wouldn't have been raped today.

What's blue and looks just like water? Water.

Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

a fat black man walks into an aquarium he was quickly shot down because he was mistaken for a whale.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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