Why did captain hook die? He wiped asss

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Why did Patrick buy an apple? So he can eat it

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In Opposites Land, you might think the opposite of small is big. But no, it's nail clippers.

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What do you call a Muslim man flying a plane? The pilot.

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What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

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Why did the old lady start crying? Because her daughter was raped and killed.

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Ok so, we have bread , tofu, coolwhip

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Go away nothing to see here,. I said go away

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What do Tom Cruise and Santa Claus have in common? They're both Tom Cruise.

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Q: How do you confuse more than 80% of the population? A: Mushrooms.

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Keith figured gasoline burns, doesn't it? He was wrong.

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Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Jokes about the Holocaust

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roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

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When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

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A boy walks into a shop He buys some sweets.

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How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Who knows? They all just sit and bitch about it.

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IF circles are squares and squares are purple and i dont know what im talking about does that make all potatoes orange?

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Have you seen the flock of birds? probably not because they hit a window and all died at impact.

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i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

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What's worse than a good anti-joke? A bad anti-joke.

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If life hands you lemons you're probably a hippy because you know someone named 'life'

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? My cheese

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What did Canada say to America? We will not become apart of the United States where people are known as Fat Nascar lovin hicks!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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