How do you a baby into a small bowl? Put it in the blender. How to u get it out? Tostitos.

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Who looks like Justin bieber, and is really cool? Justin Bieber, but I lied about him being cool.

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Q: Why did the singer stop singing? A: Someone threw a car at her face.

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how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

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Caca.

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How Do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door put the elephant in and close the door. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door take the elephant out put the giraffe in and close the door. The lion king has a meeting with all the animals but one doesn't turn up, which one is it? The giraffe because it's still in the fridge.

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Light Yagami. I'm a gay light bulb :D

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This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

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A man walks into a music store and hears dubstep playing in the background and he says, "Ugh! I hate dubstep!" Suddenly the clerk gets extremely offended and says, "Haters gonna be gay!" The man chuckles at the clerk's remark and shakes his head. "No no no silly," He said. "Haters gonna not be deaf." He says shaking his head as he walks out. The clerk tries to elaborate on what the man meant, but he realizes he cannot hear his thoughts.

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1657 is a cool number, when a leprachaun sings it sounds like pie drinking an obese penguin (do you know what I mean....) :D

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men

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Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

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What's black, white, and red all over? And interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

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Why does Jeremy Kyle love his job? Because he gets to make idiots look like bigger idiots.

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Q:Whats big, red and eats rocks? A: A big red rock eater

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you know what hurts, a revolver bullet in your brain.

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Why did the black man commit suicide last tuesday? he was just fired from his job, his sister passed away, and he became depressed

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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead.

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why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

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How many apples fit in a garbage bag? I actually don't know. I was asking you.

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Why couldn't the black kid buy a bike? He had no money.

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What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, oceans and beaches are both not alive, thus incapable of speech and feeling emotions

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Chrysanthemums our orange violettes are musical

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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