8============D PEN1S

What did the blind quadriplegic get for Christmas? Cancer.

What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

a man walks into a prostitute.

say cheese

What do you call a truck full of dead babies? Not enough.

what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

Why did the little girl have grass stains on her white dress? Because she was dragged into the forest and raped.

Why can't Jeff drive a car? because he is a rock.

How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the most direct path to his destination.

Roses are red, violets are blue; So give me head, or I queue you!

Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

What do you get hanging from an apple tree? Sore Arms.

Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

Once Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a guy so hard that he got a large bruise.

What gets bigger and bigger and bigger, then dies? A baby.

Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

=3

What would Bruno Mars do if he was on the moon? Gasp and grab his throat in an attempt to get oxygen flowing into his lungs with no avail.

Q. what has 2 tums and a boner. A. a horny guy <3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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