What did the poor boy get for Christmas? Orphaned.

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Q: What drug did the addict do at the Grand Canyon? A: None; after years of battling substance addiction, he came to realize the social, financial, and health consequences had significantly degraded his quality of life and was apalled by his bad decisions.

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how do you make time fly? throw a clock out a window.

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Wanna know way i don't eat grapes? I hate Grapes.

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whant to hear my best inpression of a hijacking ok kjgnkdgsjikdfhjnknkdfngknhfkfbnkf

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Your mom is so fat, she has diabetes.

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Hey

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What happened to the little kid who went surfing? Answer: he gOt eaten by a shark

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You know what's funny about table salt? Not much.

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i said call 911 and they said whats the number?

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How do you keep black people out of your back yard? Just like you would anyone else: buy a dog.

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What did the girl with two broken legs give her parents for Christmas? Medical bills.

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A possesed goat: "moo"

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Why did the first monkey fall off the tree? becuase he died Why did the second monkey fall off the tree? because he was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall off the tree? monkey see, monkey do

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Billy's alarm clock went off at 8:00 AM but Billy was really tired but still his Dad forced him to go to school.

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Knock knock! Who's there? ADHD ADHD wh-? SQUIRREL!

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Christians

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Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

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whats worse then a truck full of babies? if it went off a cliff into a canyon full of knives.

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A black guy and a hispanic guy walk into a bar they sit down and happily have a drink CHEESE ON TOAST

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Who would win in a fight, Godzilla or a Tyrannosaurus Rex? It doesn't matter because Godzilla is fictional and a T-Rex is extinct.

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I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

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A Muslim, a Jew, and a Christian find a magical lamp with a genie inside. He offers each of them one wish. The Muslim wishes that people didn't look at his people as terrorists. The Jew wishes that the Holocaust never happened, and the Christian wishes for world peace. Actually this didn't happen, Genies don't exist.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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