The sandwich asked the girl to make her a boy.

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what's retarded and has red hair? You. ;)

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What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

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Who wants $300? Me too.

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What do you call a cross between a dog and a bumblebee? One messed up lab experiment!

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Elise's parents have four children. The first's name is April, the second's name is May, the third's name is June. What's the fourth children's name ? July. Elise is adopted, and thus does not count.

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...and I'm a Mormon.

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''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -To. - To Who? -To whom.

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What happend to the Jew when he was near the fire place He very carefully tended to it

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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what did the homeless kid get for christmas? nothing he probably doesn't know what christmas is

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Why did the blonde fail her science test? Because she spent all day at the hair salon getting her hair died from brown to blonde when she should have spent the time productively studying.

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Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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Roses are red violets are blue you're the middle child no one cares about you

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Your moms so dumb that she has cancer..... wait thats racist

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What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

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Why did the dog in Detroit die in the street? It was stabbed.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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what did the african child get for his birthday? water, it is a very scare resource were he comes from and is considered a great present

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A chicken met a chicken, And they were chickens two, Two chickens met two chickens, And they were chickens too. Four chickens met a boiling pot And they were chicken stew.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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