A hayride would be fun.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion getting raped by 2 giant scorpions

thumb_up thumb_down +23

what is the difference between oral and anal? anal makes your day and anal makes your whole weak

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a black guy driving a Mercedes through New York? A U.S. Citizen

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the manager fire his black employee? Because he was stealing office supplies. Why was he stealing office supplies? Because he needed the money for his family. Why did he need that money? Because he wasn't being paid his full wage. Why wasn't he being paid full wage? Because his employer was a racist. Upon this analysis, the state of California ruled the case of Jones vs. Smith in favour of Mr. Jones, and ordered Mr. Smith to give Mr. Jones a cash settlement of $500,000. However, Mr. Jones was still convicted with a single charge of petty theft and was sentenced to six months in prison. His family was still awarded the settlement of $500,000. Mr. Jones made parole three months early for being an "idol inmate."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had legs and knew how to walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse then me banging your mom? The fact that I gave her HIV

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Your Mommy is a gas pump.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's 1+1? Window! Just kidding it's 2.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why do elephants paint there feet yellow? so they can hide in mustard bottles. Have you ever seen an elephant in a mustard bottle? exactly

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you convince a therapist that he is crazy? Hide in a fortress made of sporks wearing nothing but a belt, and start hissing and throwing paint at him repeatedly.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why couldn't the boy talk? He had his fathers hairy scrote was in his mouth

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what did the 35 year old man say when he walked in his home last night? Nothing, he started crying because he saw that someone had viciously killed his guinea pig.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she has no arms Why can't she get back up? Because she has no legs Why won't anyone help her up? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What's black and self-describing? The words of this joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Society.

thumb_up thumb_down -63

press a,s,d,f,g,h,j,k,l feel like a pianist

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was Michael Jackson seen shopping at Kmart? Because he heard little boys pants were 50% off the original price.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

a man walks into a bar, and gets mauled by a bear..... and gets a concussion

thumb_up thumb_down -10

"Guess what I was doing in my room last night with the door closed with my hand?" "Please don't say what I think you're going to say" "What? I was just cleaning my room."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops