Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a convicted cannibalistic rapist.

What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

Knock Knock! Who's There? Interrupting Doctor Interru--- You Have Cancer...

yolo your orange looks orange

A man said to another man," you are so stupid you climbed a glass wall to see what was on the other side." The second man said," well you were on this side of the wall and I'm going to kick your ass." The second man had been drinking that night.

whats worse than getting caught by a teacher for chewing gum? getting kidnapped by a giant hawk.

Why was the ghast from minecraft crying? His family died

you go up your hole down your hole between your hole and you rock and roll

The teacher hands out tests to the students and some of the students say to the teacher "what does 'no grade' mean?" The teacher responds, "Oh I need to grade them still.")

Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

you pick up 10 students from a school, you buy a pish from the fet store, and then drive to new york whos driving the bus? a fat guy with a level 80 org in world of warcraft

What are the black specks in birdshit called? That's birdshit too.

Yo momma so fat, when she went out side in a red dress, everyone yelled "HEY, KOOL-AID!"

How many dead babes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? its not possible because there all dead

What worse than stubbing your toe? Getting raped by a panda.

What did timmy fall off the swings? He had no arms

Why 't the blonde dial 911? Because phones haven't had dials on them for at least 40 years or so. She can however punch it in on her keypad.

How many amish people does it take to screw in a light blub? None as the amish don't require artificial light

What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a wall? Ripping them off.

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

How much does a polar bear weigh? About 800 pounds

would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

Knock Knock Who's there Bannana O He lives next door

Mary had a little lamb And a side of fries.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...