A man walked into a bar and said ow.

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A man and his son are in a store, the man says to his son, "That candy bar has your name on it." The son replies, "I wish that you didn't name me Butterfingers." The dad answers, "I wish that you were never born."

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Q: Imagine you are driving a boat, and the wheel falls off. So how many pancakes can you fit in that box? A: None, because the oranges couldn't talk.

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There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane..."

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Q: The president is driving down the road, when the wheels of his boat fall off. How many ping pong balls does it take to fill the Empire State Building? A: False. Vests don't have sleeves.

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A Priest, A Rabbi, and an Imam walk into a bar. They promptly sit down and have a friendly theological discussion.

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How do you get babys to paint a house? depends on how hard you throw them

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being held for random.

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Every human being has some kind of penis <3

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what black and white and read all over? a woman who has just been beaten and raped covered in semen.

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How do you make Justin Bieber handsome? He already is!

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What's better than ice cream? Anal sex

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Jeff was a very hard working accountant, after a very long day he drove to burger king, he looked up at the menu and said to the lady. I'll have a burger please.

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What's 6+2? 16

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Two black guys and a Latino were walking down the street. One of the black guys says to the Latino, "You have some lint on your suit." The Latino brushes it off and says, "Thank you. I have an important meeting with the board of trustees this afternoon, and it would have been embarrassing if I had lint on my suit."

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Why is brennan goldade such a loser? Cause he likes men

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Why didn't the skeleton go to th party? Because he was dead.

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Why do black people have a bad reputation? Because they do bad things.

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Two fish were lying on a bank. One said "I can't breath." The other one was dead.

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Whats the best part about 23 year olds? Theres 20 of them

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What's big, black and long? The line in KFC

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What did dick Cheney say to his friend that he accidentally shot in the face while quail hunting? Sorry for shooting you in the face

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What is the difference between Charlie Sheen and Michael Jackson? One is dead, one is not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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