What do you say to a horse at the vet? Good god, look at that ear infection.

being sober in a bar fight

Q: What's worse than finding a hundred dead babies, in one bin? A: Finding one dead baby, in a hundred bins.

I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

Friends are like lettuce; If you eat their head, they die

Why can't penguins fly? Because their wings are adapted to swim and not to fly

What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

Why couldnt the black guy swim? He couldn't swim because he had no parental figures growing up. His dad was part of a gang and his mom was a crack addict. He had noone to teach him how to swim.

meh

A grasshopper goes into a bar It is stepped on and crushed.

Why did the chicken protest? He wanted to be able to cross the street without getting his motives questioned.

why did Bernard have a bold because I ripped his Mohawk

dildos are red, vaginas are blue, mother, what have I done to you?

.sdrawkcab siht gnidaer era ouy ,siht daer nac ouy fI

Whats worse than the Holacaust? Stepping on damn Lego's. MrBounty44

A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Doctor B: Doctor who? A: Doctor Johnson, i'm here to check up on you. How's the medication going? B: It's going well thank you, it's working. A: That's very good to hear. Hope you recover soon. B: Thank you!

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem doesn't make sense Potato

Q. What is worse than being raped A. Being raped twice

Q: How do you make sweet sexy love to cow and make her come several times and then have her lick your stick clean without nobody ever finding out? While secretly keeping her as your girlfriend forever? A: Wouldn't you like to know...

So I was walking down the street the other day, I went to the shop.

Hello penis

Why is ya dad ya dad? ........ because of ya cousin

what do you call a needle with two heads? a two headed needle

Q:Whats yellow and white and sits at the bottom of a pool? A: A baby with slashed floaties Q:Whats red and gory and sits at the top of a pool? A: Floaties with a slahed baby

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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