What do you call a man who just came home from a 72-hour work shift ? You don't call him, you let him sleep.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

what did the teacher say to the kid? you failed the kid cried.

If you have read this its to late. You have already read this. Im am very sorry.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because I took a swing at it with a golf club.

So three black men walk into a bank, one of them uses the ATM, they all proceed to the exit after he is done.

Why does Beyonce sing "to the left, to the left"? Because that's where a box of everything you own is

Why did the cow go over the hill? He didn't. He was pinned and slaughtered in a private owned animal torture facility.

What's 9 + 10 19 AB

What did Newton say to Einstein? Nothing, Newton was dead before Einstein's birth.

Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

How does Hitler tie his shoes? With little Nazis.

What did the prostitute say to the cop? What? I can suck your dick for free Mr. Officer

Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

68

You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

what do you call a black man wearing a makeup? A clown

Why was the Asian so good at ping-pong? Disciprine.

Your mother is so fat that when she steps on a scale it shows her a weight that she is not very satisfied with

Why did the blonde buy a condom? Because she had a penis.

Why did Jenny fail her driving test? She was hit by a train.

How do you kill a blonde? There are a variety of methods, but I prefer a fine mix of insecure clowns and pepto-bismol.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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