What has 389,236,587 arms, has rainbow colored fur, and fornicates on your front lawn? Absolutely nothing. That's pretty much physically impossible.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A lot of things. Dead babies are not funny.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am not using commas That is improper punctuation.

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Why does Logan Cole beat off to Yo Gabba Gabba! ? Because Tim Tebow.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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knock knock whos their? kevin kevin who? knock knock huh? queef

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whats 7+4? 74

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A guy walks into a bar, orders a drink, and nothing interesting happens.

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2 black people and a mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The black person because they decided it would save gas if they all carpooled to their job.

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Q: What do you call an alligator in a vest? A: An investigator

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Excuse me waiter! What the hell is this fly doing on my soup? I believe it's swimming on it, sir.

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What does a grandmas vagina taste like? Depends.

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Chuck Norris screams in pain.

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knock knock. who's there? someone.

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whats the difference between an orange and a dead baby? one is a tasty treat and the other is an orange

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WHATS A CRUM AND LIVES IN A SLUM ?? A BOY CALLED KEVIN CRUMMY

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roses are red, violets are violet

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AAAnd that did not totally send a rush of sweet endorphin's up my spine, I think myself of as really really blunt, I value individualism rather than complete assimilation, I think that, if people want to hear my opinion, they ask me, and if they want to hear what they want to hear, they can ask... Pff, anybody else. I end up insulting a lot of people literally asking for it, but moments like these make it all worth it. I am also extremely superstitious, the catchphra states "Grain of salt" so I wont take your comment completely... I am just screwing around...

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What happened to the man that jumped off the cliff. He died....

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What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Roses are orange Violets are grey I love penguins Damn Jews

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Your mom is soooo fat..... She'll most likely suffer a heart attack

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Whats black and crying after 10 minute my wife's eyes when she left the kitchen

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Your mom is soo black , she can go naked to a funeral.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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