How do you say cabbage in Spanish? You don't.

What did Jim do after the police gave him a ticket? He followed them home and used their children's limbs to rape them.

How do you find the population of Mexico? You take a census count by mail and/or a door to door questionnaire.

Mary- Hey Dallas, do you have a suitcase? Dallas- Yeah, why? Mary- I need a suitcase

yo mama so fat that when she jumped on her tempurpedic mattress the wine did spill

You know how they say cats have nine lives? They don't.

What's the difference between above job and below job? Below job sucks

Q. whats piggy called A. Patrick gearthey

How do you make the perfect anti-joke? Don't tell it.

Fun Fact: If humans stood in a single file line around the equator, most of them would drown.

If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests? Tests.

Q: Why did the wihte man buy a burger? A: cuz he was hungry

How do you tell a crazy man that he is on fire? You're on fire.

when life gives you lemons you make lemonade when life gives you a homisidle brige you clearly have done something to make life angery

If Chuck Norris was really so awesome he would come and slam my head into the keyboard.

Joe diragi is gayer than elton john

A retarded man speaks jibberish, because he is retarded

Whats black, and chrispy inside...? A black guy with bonecancer

Who lost World War II? The Jews.

I supported my sisters decision to get an abortion. Still would have been cool to be a dad :/

What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? *awkward silence* What did the deaf guy say to the mute guy? *Awkward silence....huh?*

Why did the man with brain cancer die? He drove his Segway off a cliff.

What's the difference between a duck and a belt? One floats in water and I don't remember the rest but you are a whore.

How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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