Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

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What do you call a deer with only one leg? A one legged deer. What do you call a deer with one leg, one eye and lives in Rome? Still a one legged deer.

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

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How many Stephen Hawkings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He can't.

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Shaun Sutton Call me: 1-800-tryhard ;)

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A terrorist. What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. What are you racist or something?

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What do you call a black man and woman with a little white girl? A Family.

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'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' That's fantastic because Peter Piper was paralyzed and the doctors said he would never be able tomove is arms or legs again, and there he is picking a peck of pickled peppers. I applaud you Peter Piper.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

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what did the chinese man say to the other asian? he said ??????

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A young couple just gave birth to their first child and the doctor says, "I’ve good some good news and some bad news, what do you want first?" "Give us the bad news first", the parents reply. "Your baby has red hair", says the doctor. "Well whats the good news", ask the parents. "It’s dead", says the doctor.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Q: Why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: What to year old WOULDN'T?

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What's the difference between a baby and a pineapple? Pineapples were not shot by nazis during the holocaust.

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whats white jizz

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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How do you wake a clown up? By pouring vinegar in his eyes.

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Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

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A horse walks into a bar... just kidding the doors were to smal.l

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Your Mother

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How do you stop a group of black guys from fighting? go over to them and ask them politely to stop.

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How did they wake up Lady Gaga? They p-p-poked her face p-p-poked her face......!

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How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

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Why was the man eaten by a tiger? Because tigers are carnivores, but why are they carnivores? Because they eat meat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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