How would you punish Helen Keller? Make her read a basketball.

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Knock Knock! Come in.

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Why did the man suck at basketball? Because he is white, 5 foot 2, and has no arms. Posted By: Lram

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What did the dinosaur say to the centipede? Its funny cause the dinosaur is big and the centipede is small. Also dinosaurs can't even talk!

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I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

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A man is cheating on his wife. His wife finds out and is instantly distressed and begins to cry.

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What is the worst thing about a couple of white kids playing with a couple of black kids? There are no parks or recreation centers within walking distance from there houses.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Anal.

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Why did the terrorist miss the flight he was supposed to blow up? He forgot his passport.

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why was the gay person gay? he liked penis in his bum.

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Why does Helen Keller only masturbate with one hand? Because she's moaning with the other.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interru--- MOO! I'm so sorry, I have Tourette's Syndrome and cannot control these sudden outbursts. Please continue.

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How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? Purple because, ice-cream has no bones.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A blonde, brunette, and red-head were on a deserted island. The blonde said, "in thirty years or so, we'll all have gray hair."

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What smells like weed? the person who smoked it.

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What's small and red that sits in a corner? A baby with a razor blade.

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What's worse then three frogs playing leap frog? Nothing that would be awesome

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A: What is worse than a melted chocolate bar. B: An eaten one.

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Whats similar between a grape and a duck? They're both purple. except not the duck.

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Bean.

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Who's the cutest girl in the world? Claire Seiter.

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What's white on the top and black on the bottom? Society.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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