Q: What's gray and comes in gallons? A: Gray paint.

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96

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What did the librarian say to the rude man who was talking very loudly? The librarian said "shhh keep it down."

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How do you make a plummer sad? Kill his family.

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How do you say vampire in spanish? Vampiro.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Dave I don't know a Dave, Please leave.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to see its chicks that got run over by a car.

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It's all Taggart

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a man runs into a bar and screams, he is sent to a doctor for a minor concussion and receives some stitches. He recovers over time and gets on with his life.

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there's a bus full of black people what do you call the white bus driver? coach.

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Why did the toilet paper roll? Because it isn't rock!

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What did the scientist call a spider? An arachnid.

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Every first letter of an innappropriate body part is how it actually looks like: Penis, Vagina, Boobs

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Let them think that you are insane, vulnerable, and they wont bother leaking a lot of shit about you, this "shit info" will remain inaccurate and reveal weaknesses where there is none. I had to draw them away from you, but as soon as he began selling Intel regarding my missing eye, I figure our "not so friends in the unknown" would have eventually begun searching for "The one eyed man" among you. And had they not found one, they might just as likely made it seem as if there was one for the money. None of the thugs sent to attack me nor the "Nero decoys" where professionals, but those behind them sure are, considering that they paid these thugs more than what I make during a year. Gotta go pretty girl, hope we meet again in not so long. Moral: This is all a joke, get over it, Moral has left forever, mission complete.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? I have cancer.

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Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

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What really killed the dinosaurs? ME!!!

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Let's write an anti-joke. K.

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Wanna know who doesnt no how to right a joke? Who ever wrote this...

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Have you seen Ray Charles' new house? Neither has he...

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Yo mamma is so fat, that she's going on a diet and is exercising regularly to lose wait.

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What did the psychiatrist say to the man wearing nothing but Saran Wrap? - "That's for food. You should wear clothes instead."

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what happened to walt disney when he died? nothing he was frozen and has been for many years now

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What is the difference between a rock and a pencil? Your Mom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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