There was an Irishman, an American and a French man standing at a bar. They all ordered drinks and struck up conversation with each other about what they do for a living and their families. They all go home to their partners and have a peaceful nights sleep.

You stink so bad that you should cleanse yourself via shower and/or bath.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has two legs

Knock Knock Who's there? Pussy... Do you get it? Think about what you just answered.

what does wtf stand for? what? i was asking you!

Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

Why couldn't the kid get in to see the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.

What is the favorite song of Lady Di? no, that is a dead person and must be respected.

I am white, you are black, we can be friends, racism was abolished.

What's slippery when wet? A wet slipper.

What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a PS3? Michael was a succesful dancer, singer-songwriter, musician, and philanthropist, whereas a PS3 is a games console.

Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

Person A: I think your father might be a thief, I'm not sure though. Person B: How come? person A: I cannot find my virginity. Person B: I apologize my dad taught me well.

what did eric foreman get for christmas? a foot in his ass.

Roses are red, violets are blue. This is a poem about flowers.

Whats worse than being bored, Being you.

Are you from Tennessee? Because you look like a product of incest

Q. How many infants does it take to paint a wall? A. Depends how hard you throw them...

What's black and white and red all over and can't turn around in an elevator? A nun with a spear through her back

Roses are red my name is Dave this poem makes no sense, micorwave

There are three guys on an airplane, a Korean, a Mexican, and an American. The pilot comes on the speaker and syays,"The plane is to heavy, throw out the thing you have most in your country." The Korean throws out an AK-47 and says,"We have to many of these in our country." The Mexican throws out a taco and says,"We have to many of these in our country." The American throws out the Mexican and says,"We have to many of these in our country."

You.

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Immobile.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...