Why didn't the women make her husband a sandwitch? Because she was struck by a car as a young child and was told she could never walk again. Her family couldn't afford a wheelchair so therefore she is bedridden all day.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A white player in the NBA. Wait...

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you say to a cashier? How much is it?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats worse than finding bubba in your house? Getting raped by a rabid racoon..

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Barney is a dinosaur We see on medication! And when we are high on drugs He's a hallucination!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: why didn't johnny do his homework? A:because johnny is dead

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

How did the baby cross the road? The baby got stapled to a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock, Knock! Go away!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A creationist, an evolutionist, and Neanderthal Man walk into a bar. They order two beers and a glass of red wine. The bartender asks: "Will that be all?". The evolutionist says "Yes"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

yo mama is so fat she broke a branch off the family tree

thumb_up thumb_down -13

There were three elephants in a bathtub. One said, "Pass me the soap." The other one said, "What do you think I am? A Radio???"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a dinosaur that doesn't lay eggs? A male dinosaur

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q. Why did the teacher trip and fall? A. Because his left foot was gnawed off by a camel, and he often finds it difficult to walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +58

What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The teachers cat is a fat cat and his name is ... why do even whant to know you stalker

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you fit three gay men on a stool? You don't, that would be very uncomfortable.

thumb_up thumb_down -63

My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

thumb_up thumb_down -73

A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the hockey cross the road? To get to KFC.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do dogs and cats have in common? They eat dog food, accept for the cat.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops