Whats blue and flies? A suffocating baby strapped to a fan.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple ? Finding out your apple is rotten on top of that.

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3 men are walking down a dirt path. One is a retired member of the US Air Force. The other of the Marines. The last one of the Navy. They are arguing about why their respective section of the military is the best. They lose track of where they're going and fall off of a cliff onto the spinning propeller of a US Coast Guard helicopter.

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Roses are red, violets are blue my neighbor is black he will jump you too

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What's worse than shoveling dead babies??? Using a pitchfork...

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What's worse then biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your apple and finding two worms.

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Q:Why did the kid drop his ice cream A:He was hit by a car

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Want to know how the dyslexic man with no left arm and no left leg? All left

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Why did the chicken cross the road. Because most living organisms eventually cross some form path that is commonly known as a road. Roads are hard asphalt that is very good for cars and other wheeled road licensed vehicles.

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What do you call a dumb friend? Sam.

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Your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you're just a figment of my imagination.\

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What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

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A bus with 11 passengers is making its final stops for the night. At main street it drops of 6 people and picks up 2, at broad it drops of 3 and picks up 4, at 3rd street it drops of 5 and picks up 1, and finally at 6th street it drops off 4 and picks up 0. How many people are still on the bus? 13 if you include the dead bodies in the back

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. You wife was killed in an accident.

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Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

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How do get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

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What did the bartender say to the three-legged Irishman? What can I get you?

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Roses are black, violets are black, we are all black Shit i'm colour blind

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why are black people so good at sports? hard work and dedication

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There is a bunch of penguins and they fall of a cliff

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Jesse gets back at people who takes his job, by trying to get with their sloppy seconds.. Emphasize trying.

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how do you know a chinese person has been in your house? #1 your homework is done #2 your computer is upgraded #3 when you get home there still pulling out of your driveway

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A man returns from the army and finds his wife in bed with another man. He kills them both.

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SQUID DOMINATION!!! Squids WILL Take Over the World!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops