Your momma is so short, she needed my help to reach something off the top shelf.

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Know what's funnier than the holocaust? Almost everything i can possibly imagine. The holocaust was a terrible case of mass extermination due solely to naxis racist views

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What do you call a cross between a dog and a bumblebee? One messed up lab experiment!

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Me: did u here the one about the girl got hit by a car? Man: no what happened? Me: She is in the hosspital with slight fractures and a broken wrist, but she will live

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Why not zoidburg? Because Zoidburg is a alien from another planet and the human population is probally afraid to talk to him do to the potential danger of alien contact.

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Hitler was in a shampoo advert that everyone bought Now people must be dying to take a shower

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Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Colorblindness isn't funny And neither are you

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What do you call somebody with no arms or legs and they are stranded in the middle of the ocean? Answer: screwed

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roses aren't red, violets aren't blue, they're all black, cause i'm colorblind. what about you?

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i love antijokes

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Why didnt the boy eat his ice cream? Because he is dairy intolerant

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:y do people talk? ;idk :oh then nevermind

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q. what did the fat guy get from burger king a. heart disease

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If Jimmy has 60 candy bars and eats 50 of them, what does he have? Diabetes.

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You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Q. How many puns does it take to make a cup of tea? A. None. A pun is a grammatical construct and as such is incapable of combining the ingredients necessary to generate a hot drink which has been popular for hundreds of years.

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What's the difference between meat and fish? You can't beat your fish.

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What's brown? My toilet hahaha

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What is green and has wheels A blue bucket, I lied about the green and the wheels

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What's black, white, and hungry? The population of Zimbabwe.

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"Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's parents?" "No" "Neither has he"

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzhiemers Wait, who are you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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