Whats blue, sticky and glows only during the morning? IDK -Lets go Mets

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Q: What time do you see a Chinese dentist? A: Never because China has a flawed healthcare system due to overpopulation. It is a sad and sobering reality of the plight of the Chinese citizens.

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How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

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How did the man with no legs get around? He was assisted by a nurse or relative who was kind enough to take on such a task.

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Scene:restraunt Me:can I have a coke please? Waiter:sorry we don't have any, is Pepsi ok? Me:is monopoly money ok?

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What happens if you roll a nickel down a street in Mexico? It eventually stops and lands on its side.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children falling off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

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I enjoy owboy butt sex with big black men please call me at 9528579236

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My mind is like full of holes so I cannot remember where I am anymore, and I am tired in addition, but say, what the hell is a tussle? Sounds cute, but what is that?

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Knock knock! Who's there? Sheryl Sheryl who? No seriously, it's me, Sheryl.

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A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

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Good for him. Thats wonderful!

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whats black dirty gross and sits on the porch all day? a trash bag

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Why did the man talk to the potato? Because hes stupid.

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Why didn't Jane text James? Because she was kidnapped.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Time to get a watch

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What's blue and fluffy? Pink fluff holding its breath

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I just met you! And this is crazy! I just took bath salts, and yor face looks tasty!

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So a Jew an Asian and a gay guy all walk into a bar... ...I lied. It was an oven.

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-Knock, knock. -Is it the pizza man? -No. -Then go away.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He was butchered on the farm for chicken fingers.

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What did the man give his wife for her anniversary? Nothing. The man is a raging alcoholic and forget her anniversary due to his high alcoholic intake during the past few weeks. Even if he did remember he most likely didn't care after seeing his wife cheat on him with another woman putting his marriage into shambles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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