Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" *dies*

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? No. Well, neither has he

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What is sticky and smelly - a stick

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How do you make a baby eat his food? Make one first

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side

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A horse walked into a bar. Several people got up and left as they spotted the potential danger in the situation.

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What does a black man do when drives up to a STOP sign? Stops.

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Why did the chicken cro- Oh. He got run over.

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So a man walks into a bar. Well, he trips over it because it was very low to the ground and he didn't see it.

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jam ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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I can still remember the last words my brother said before he kicked the bucket. "Hey you guys,how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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I look back at all those hours I wasted playing those stupid video games, but then I'm reminded of all those people I brutally killed.

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Keira Knightley walked in to a coffee shop. The man behind the counter said "Wow, you're Keira Knightley!". Keira replied, "No, actually I am just one of your many masturbatory fantasies. You are currently staring at an old lady that just asked you for a latte". "Oh, by the way. You are drooling and have an erection."

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What is worse then finding an apple in your worm? Not a lot.

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Roses are 3:18 Violets are 3:18 I Just figured out a pattern. And saved peoples lives with the help of Keifer Sutherland.

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Why was the boy sad? He was harassed by his mum who died in the 1800's and went into a depressive state in which he drove himself to death using a pair of pliers and a rechargeable battery. No, he really just stubbed his toe.

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you are black i am black except for your big hairy ass

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Once upon a cross

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Whats the difference between a house and a truck? Ones a truck the other one is a house

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you dirty racist.

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What's worse then breaking your xbox? Going on a 24 kill streak and having itchy balls.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Minecraft!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops