What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

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what do you give a little girl with no arms no legs and who lives in a orfanidge for christmas?.................................... nothing because no parent wants a freak kid

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Knock knock. Who's there It's Jim O ok come on in

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Did you know Hellen Keller had a dollhouse in her backyard? Neither did she.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Whats the thing you least expect to find on Anti-Joke? A joke with a punchline.

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Why couldn't the asian man drive? He had no arms.

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What do Australians and New Zealanders have against pods anyway?

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What's the difference between a gay and a homo?...........WTF I DON'T KNOW!?!?!?!?

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How did the suicide bomber die? Cancer.

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Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Duh!!!."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he (assuming he bears male reproductive organs) saw some corn on the other side (using the light rays refracted primarily by his cornea onto the retina) which is his staple diet as he is a herbivorous chicken. As corn is the producer of the food chain in question and the chicken is the primary consumer, a fox being the secondary and an angry farmer being the tertiary, he needs to ingest this food source in order to obtain the glucose required to produce adenosine triphosphate by the process of aerobic respiration in the mitochondria of his chicken cells. Thus, the chicken crossed the road.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it was suicidal.

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Little Timmy walks up to the teacher during class and asks "Can i use the restroom?" The teacher says "I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy says "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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hey jimmy! hey bob -.- jimmy, pls pls explain how to do this.. ): see your mom? yea... do it like we did her (OOOHHHH!)

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Whats better than a panda? A panda with an ice cream cone.

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What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

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What's worse than a spider bite? Two spider bites. What's worse than two spider bites? The fact that 1/3 of people get cancer. What's worse than that? Three spider bites.

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How many baby's does it take to paint a wall Depends on how hard you throw them

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A man is driving the speed limit of 55 on the highway. He gets pulled over and the cop says, "Do you know how fast you were going sir?" The man replies "Well yes I was going 55, the speed limit." The cop says, "No you were going 80." The speedometers broken.

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Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

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What's tastier than a dead baby? An orphaned dead baby.

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How do you make a tissue dance? You really can't, but you could grab it and shake it around so it looks like its dancing.

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Ahem. Testicles. That is all.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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