What did the sphinx say to the Minotaur? Nothing, as they are fictional creatures and in according to probable science, don't not exist.

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what do an elephant and a grape have in common? One of them is purple.

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why did they make a new iphone? because individuals like to be connected to local and world wide media so they can stay in touch with all news, friends and family.

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Why couldnt the dog bark? The dog didnt exist.

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Tin is a chemical element with symbol Sn (for Latin: stannum) and atomic number 50. It is a main group metal in group 14 of the periodic table. Tin shows chemical similarity to both neighboring group-14 elements, germanium and lead, and has two possible oxidation states, +2 and the slightly more stable +4. Tin is the 49th most abundant element and has, with 10 stable isotopes, the largest number of stable isotopes in the periodic table. It is a silvery, malleable other metal that is not easily oxidized in air, obtained chiefly from the mineral cassiterite where it occurs as tin dioxide, SnO2.

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Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

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A man walks into a bar. He says ow

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A man walks into a bar and is shot in the face

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What did the strawberry say to the grape? Nothing, inanimate objects can't use verbal communication.

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How do you scare a bonde? tell her you want to be her uterus?

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Why doesn't Michael Jackson like toast? Because he's dead.

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Why was the mom happy cause her daughter had an abortion

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What did andy say when he went down on burger nips? Welcome to the jungle

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Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

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Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Why can't the t-Rex clap..... Because it is dead

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24... wait i thought of something better than 24... let me hear it... 25!!!!

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Why do firemen wear red suspenders? To keep their pants up.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimers Roses are red Violets are blue Cabbage

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Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

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Why is mario red? His mother beat him as a child.

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Q: What's green and goes through walls? A: A pickle, you just have to throw it really hard.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a bmw? I don't have a bmw in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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