Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

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Whats black and blue and doesnt bruise? a bruise.

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What did the boy say after smoking weed for the first time? -"I don't really feel anything" and his friends explained that is sometimes the case for a first time smoker.

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01010010001010010100100101001001010010100100100100100100100100100100100100010010101010101010101011010101010110010101010 Dolphin

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Sticks and stones may break my bones because I have osteoporosis

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Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

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Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

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Why did Bob fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Obviously not Bob, Idiot What did Bob get for christmas? A glove Actually, I lie. He hasn't unboxed it yet.

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A mexican Police officer walks into a crime scene. "Ouch." he exclaims, rubbing his forehead where a red bump is already surfacing.

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What's purple and eats rocks? Scientists are still looking into this question.

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knock knock! who's there? a fat salesperson here to deliver your supplements

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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What is red and has wheels? Grass, I lied about it being red and having wheels.

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What do you call George Mills? A very kind, sensitive person with a poor music taste.

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What is rectangular, white and has two wheels? A limo getting its wheels replaced.

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What is cowboy say

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what is the best invention ever created ? ............ PORN !!!!

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Me - Ask me if I am a Frog. You - Are you a Frog? Me - No.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are due to transportation issues. (What if there are no replacement light bulbs in the house, and the nearest store was 10 miles away? It would be ridiculous to expect someone to walk twenty miles to replace a light bulb) In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

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what was the first thing Barack Obama said to the people of america? ... hi

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Why did Tyrone attack? Because he was getting made fun of

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit it with an axe

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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