A man walks into a bar and utters profanity because he's hit his head on a protruding metal object that cannot move out of the way and has therefore made him look stupid because he neglected to walk around it.

What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

An englishman, a german and a ginger are in a band. they play some creative music that some people may find enjoyable to listen to and would like to purchase a track.

A Mexican got stopped by the police. Turns out it was a mistake and the man lived a happy life in America

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Thomas the Tank Engine could see Express up ahead on the tracks! His driver shut off steam and applied his brakes. Ahead of him Gordon groaned "Ohhhhh stop your train! Stop your train! His driver and fireman jumped out quickly. Thomas tried his very hardest and eventually found himself slowing down. But there wasn't enough time and Thomas smashed right into the express. Seven people were killed and Thomas himself was smashed to pieces.

what was the biggest game of hide and seek? World War II and the Jews won

When life gives you Live Aid, celebrate the fact that you've just gone back in time 27 years and somehow cheated death temporarily.

whats worse than a 6 dead babies in a dumpster? You were babysitting them.

what do you use to blindfold chinese person? dental floss!!

Cows go moo.

2 muffins are in the oven. After about 15 minutes, they both died.

why did the chicken cross the road ask jake darby

why can't you hear a pterodactyl pee? Because the "p" is silent

whats a worse movie than saw I don't know my mom won't let me watch any

Huh? Whats wrong? Why are you mad at me for? Its my name, it has always been so.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cross light said signal said "GO"

Q: What do you call a group of asians riding their bikes while carrying large bags of merchandise filled with an ample amount of video games? A: Obviously, a few enviromentally-friendly entrepreneurs who managed to make enough of a profit via their established buisness to the extent that they could buy what they required and get some other desired items as well.

What do you call a tub full of water? A bathtub!

What did the kid tell his father? Go away, I'm watching elmo!

what's black and white and red all over? nothing... it's red

What did the orphan get for christmas? Tuberculosis

Why was OJ Simpson's knife covered in blood? Because he just murdered his wife.

So theres a man, a horse, and a piglet in a helicopter. Upon noticing this, the pilot jumps out of the plane and the animals go crashing to their doom.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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