What did the bride do on her wedding day? Get married.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The man walked into the church and stayed there.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Two fish are in a tank. The first one says, "How the heck do I drive this thing!".

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why was the boy laughing? Because

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A thief stole a calendar. Later, feeling guilty, he returned it to its owner, admitted his misconduct, and went to a local minimart to purchase his own.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's Black/White and red all over? Obama when he gets a little flustered.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How did the boy fly? he had wings.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats the difference between Whitney Huston and rubber duck? The rubber duck dosent smoke crack. hmm to soon?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Think of the worst thing you know of and add dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down -18

This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well shit whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

thumb_up thumb_down -33

why did the white guy go to a black mans yard sale? to get his stuff back

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the penguin say to the fisherman? Nothing, they are different animals, and thus, unable to communicate.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This joke is stupid, Chuck Testa.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

knock knock who's there? doorbell repairman

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did one sexy babe say to the other? We are sexy

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Your momma is so old that she might die soon!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

i bought a knock-knock joke book, and was unamused.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops