A traveling salesman breaks down on a rainy night, but spies a farm house. he knocks on the door and the farmer answers. the salesman asks if he can spend the night. the farmer says "sure, but i gotta warn you, i don't have any daughters."

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Why did the personal trainer get fired from the gym? He lacked good customer service skills.

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I like my coffee like i like my woman.... with big titis.

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How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

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Q: Why didn't johnny get any Christmas presents? A: Because he died in a house fire 3 years ago.

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Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

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What did the business man say to the homeless person? Get a job

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How do you stop a plane? Land it.

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

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Are you trolling with me? I mean how can you know where I live if you have not even picked up the phone yet? Listen, if you wanted to make me upset, you did it okay? You won, I like you a lot and I would never do such a thing. I understand you being upset Nero, I am so sorry, I never meant nor wanted for this to happen, I hope you can forgive me someday.

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Why did the woman buy peanut butter and a puppy? Her husband just died. She was trying to fill the void in her soul with junk food and companionship.

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An orphan falls off a cliff.

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What's worse than being swallowed by a blue whale? Being swallowed by a bule whale with herpes.

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What's worse than carrying a heavy suitcase? Poisoning children.

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What's worse then listening to Nickleback? The Holo- On second thought, nothing.

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Q: How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A: Depends on the size of the tub and the size of the babies.

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What did God say to Abraham? Nothing, because God doesn't exist.

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How did Hitler make the world a better place? He died.

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Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

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Dont be mean Dyslexics are teople poo

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What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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Q:What time is it when you have to go to the dentist? A: It varies. But most dental offices are open for service between 8am and 4pm

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Why do people waste time reading these jokes. Because they like anti jokes.

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Why do black people cuss so much? Because f#*% you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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