Roses are red, violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Cheese on toast.

Why do beavers have flat tails? They don't know but their relatives certainly get upset

Knock Knock Come in.

What happens when you eat all the strawberries? They are GONE...

Isn't it funny that we think it's totally normal for females to not have penises but for literally EVERY OTHER group of people, it's weird and not ok double standard?

What direction do 5 gay guys walk? I am unable to answer that because they are all aspiring to work in different occupational fields.

There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

ask me if i'm a tree. are you a tree? no

A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Are you a tree? A: No.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah...

Q: Why wouldn't the other kids play with Timmy at recess? A: Because he was a burn victim and had no face.

Why did the black man walk into the catholic church? He was catholic.

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

What's brown and sticky? a stick

What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

Who is JP? A really smart kid! HAHA jk

What do you call a gay dinosaur? Megasoreass What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Lickalottapuss What dou you call a gay dinosaurs dog? Megasoreass Rex

Want to here a joke? Me to...

What do you call a black man climbing a mountain. A mountain climber.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. The Clouds are white. Thank God I am too.

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

Soccer...

What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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