Why is the sky blue? I don't know I thought you knew

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what is red and lies in all four corners of the room? a baby that was playing with a chainsaw.

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What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

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What's the difference between a screwdriver and DJ Pauly D? One's a tool and one is an inanimate object.

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Your mom is so cheap, that she eats her cereal with a fork to save milk

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What is a bull like in a China Shop? Calm, because generally any bull you would find in a China shop is probably made out of porcelain.

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how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

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What do you call a sandwich that has sandwich on it? A sandwich.

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Hi.

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Q: what did batman say to robin before they got into the car? A: get in the car (:

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Why isn't eating an Olympic sport? Because that wouldn't make any sense.

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Q: Wy couldn't the T-rex grab the other Dinosor? A: Because he is extinct.

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roses are red violets should be purple

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

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Nero Octavios reporting, so far all of our sectors worldwide excluding Spain, Italy and Ground Zero are secure, Nero Augustus is severely wounded but will make it, and despite the our intel Necrissa Angelo is alive and well. We have one single worry though Nero7 the brunt force of the terror attack was large and powerful, yet resistance was incredibly light when we went for the counter-strike, too light, we might have to ready ourselves for some sort of reprisal here.

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What was Dillon's old name? Dillon, I lied about the old name part.

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How do you stop a drunk driver? With a minivan and family of four.

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a bed? A: The victim of a serious car accident in a hospital bed.

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That dress looks amazing on you considering how fat you are.

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Why did the weiner dog that punctured Doris' bladder get carried away during an oral sex session? Because the dog had a terribly troubled childhood which led to a faliure to adequately function in adulthood

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Why'd humpty dumpy fall of the wall? Someone threw a fridge at him

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because this chicken had a mental disability and saw on the news that there was a hospital on the other side of the road that could treat his illness and possibly save his life, allowing him to fulfill his life-long dream of retirement. But knowing that chickens do not possess the brain power capable of understanding the situation that this chicken was in, it had probably gotten lost and just wandered off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops