I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot, black, liquid, and in a cup.

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What did the teenage girl get for just sweet 16? An abortion

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A king's son's birthday came one day and the king asked what he wanted. "You can have anything in the world son." He would say. The prince answered,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." So for his birthday he got a rollar costar, a new car, a water park, a castle, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. The same answer went out of his mouth for three years. One day the prince was driving in his car, and he got into a terrible car accadent. And while he was in the ER and saying his last words, his father asked,"Son, before you die, i must know, why did you want purple ping pong balls for your all of those birthdays?" And the prince said,"Well I wanted them because-" and then he died.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are rather unintelligent animals which clearly underestimate the dangers of crossing a busy road.

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A daring man proclaimed "Well, here goes nothing!" as his FaceBook status, and all his friends were annoyed.

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Why was the manspenis big Cause he was a lucky bastard

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Roses are red My name is Dave This makes no sense MICROWAVE

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Somewhere in prison- Germany 1940 Janurary, Tuesday, 630PM: "Why doya' think you're so innocent" "It was only a jew!"

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Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Raped

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Chayton

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Why did the black man go to portugal? Because he was very hard working and needed a vacation.

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Why did Mr. Cannon dies Because he got shot as an undercover cop in south america

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When you're climbing up a ladder and you feel something splatter, you may want to see what happened, and then promptly clean up the mess so one one slips.

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What did the smiley face say to the other smiley face? Nothing. They just smiled.

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My name is Jeff

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What's worse than finding an apple in your worm? Lebron traveled

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What is a grammatically incorrect equestrian? An stallion.

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Why did the bunny hit the drum? It didn't because it did not have the mental capacity or physical capabilities to do so

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"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "On your face"

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Why did the baby stop crying? It had been smothered to death by it's sleep- deprived single mother.

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Two peanuts walked into a bar... One was a salted.

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Why do Indian people smell like curry? They don't. Its an ignorant misconception.

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What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods They both have beards... EXCEPT FOR TIGER WOODS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops