Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he could beat the oncoming car.

Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have alzheimer's Hey I just met you Coopn8r

What did batman say to robin befor they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

If I crash my car, how many trees does it take to cover my yard in orange juice, yellow, because a cat pissed on my foot.

Adam eats ginger nuts the fookin chicken

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tied to the first monkey.

I flipped through the Yellow Pages, made a few calls, and found the Chinese man I was looking for.

A grandmother in her late seventies is walking to the grocery store. Then out of nowhere,she stats getting pelted by bananas. One hits her hard on the head,and she dies.

What's the difference between a pizza and a jew? A pizza is an Italian food and a jew is a human that practices the Jewish faith

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Q: What did the skeleton order when he walked into a bar? A: A beer and a mop.

What did the Homosexual say to the Southern American? I'm A Homosexual. What did the Southern American say back? I Respect That.

"My c.ock is bigger!" "No! My c.ock is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger dick.

How can you confuse a blonde? Give her a calculus worksheet that she hasn't learned how to do.

What's red but smells like blue paint? Red paint.

What's the difference between my dog and my wife? I respect my dog.

What is Chuck Norris's favorite musical theme? Tanana na na naa naa na, ta ta ta tanana na naa na ta na na.

Why do women like NASCAR? They don't.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

A man was walking down the sidewalk. Then he turned into a drugstore.

What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

Q. What did the Muffins say to the man? A. Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects therefore unable to speak.

Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. What? You are about to die and be eaten. Asshole! i will murder you first!

How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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