What did Tommy's father tell him on Christmas? Nothing, he was violently stabbed to death on Christmas Eve.

Q: why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: what 10 year old WOULDN'T?

why did the chicken cross the road? he was stapeled to a cow and the cow got hit by a bus so they died.

What's worse than falling out of a tree and landing on a dog? Rape.

Why is Dominic's nick name big D? Because the first letter in his name is D.

i know the best knock knock joke! you start! other person: knock knock me: whos there ........

THERES AN APP FOR ANTI JOKES ? now thats not funny !

Ask if I'm a aardvark. Are you a aardvark? Yes.

What did the kid with cancer get for christmas. Nothing. He was Jewish.

Why did the car cross the road? Green light

A blond walked into a bar. A guy picker her up and then they had sex.

what's bad about pushing your friend off a cliff? you can't do it twice

what did the boy with no arms get for easter? a cane.

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

Want to know how the dyslexic man with no left arm and no left leg? All left

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor.

What's red, loose, and easy to wear? A rock. I lie about everything.

Who has lots of friends, but smells like urinate feceas? Smelly McD, I lied about the friends.

Know what's worse than being publicly embarrassed in front of your crush? Jeffrey dahmer

Why did the woman call 911? Fire.

Q:What did I get for Christmas? A:You, put on this leash.

You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

Whats black and hangs from the my tree? A tire swing.

A man walks into the doctor's office and says, "Doc, every time I drink coffee, my eye hurts". The Doctor then tells him, "You have an infection called conjunctivitis, also known as pinkeye"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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