Bill: ask me if i am three ducks in a man suit Jim: are you three ducks in a man suit? Bill: yes

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A black man and a mexican are in a car. Who is driving? The black man.

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Could switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance? Yes.

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How do you piss off a lion? You repeatedly poke it with a stick.

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Knock Knock Who’s there? Who Who who? Who who who Who who who who? Who who who who who who who who who who who who who who who…

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You had ONE job. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to support your dying wife and ill child.

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What's worse than failing a school test for Peter? Nothing, because he is asian.

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What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car> "Get in the car."

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Knock Knock. Who's There? silence... Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

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The real Justin Beiber reallly followed me on twitter I deleted my account, set my computer on fire, scattered the ashes and killed myself

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A blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who hits the ground first? The one that jumped first

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What's green and has wheels? The White House. I lied about everything, I'm so sorry.

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Where to, sir? Forward.

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Whats worse than 4 dead babies in a bucket? finding an actual joke on Anti Joke.

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All of the people in the burning building escaped except for one what was wrong with that one person? He was a blind, could not hear and was in a wheelchair.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will have her institutionalized as soon as they find her.

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What did the deaf-blind kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why did the baby boy start crying? He got hit with a toaster

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A tree falls over on an old woman. Mysteriously, the woman lifts the tree up and walks away. A man is amazed by this, so he goes and asks the woman how she managed to lift the whole tree. She tells the man that he is an idiot an walks away. Later inspecting the tree, he realizes it is a small sapling weighing no less than 10 pounds

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A very rich man had a daughter whom all of the men in town wanted to marry her for wealth. Except there was one man who wanted to marry her due to his love for her. The father let his daughter marry whomever she wanted from all of the men in town, and she chose a man named Wilson Fremblington who wanted to marry her for wealth, because he was physically fit and overall a friendly man.

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What happened after Will Ferrell took a dump? He wiped his ass and flushed.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? Physical abuse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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