Why was the blonde fired from the M &M's factory? Her Masters degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the job she had.

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What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To find some grain.

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Man hears son masturbating in room. The dad enters the room and tells him "Son if you keep jacking off you will go blind". The boy replies "Dad I"m over here".

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My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

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What is white and flies upwards? A retarded Snowflake.

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There was once a man who went to the store and walked across a bridge and bought toothpaste and yelled at a hobo and went home and took a nap and then he went back to the park where he talked to an english teacher who told him not to use run-on sentences or she would slap him with a fish.

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Why didn't Megan do her homework? Although Megan was an intelligent girl who had always done well academically, she remained unconvinced that anything taught in school held practical or philosophical importance.

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what's worse than a kitten scratching your arm? A dead baby scratching your arm...

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why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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What rhymes with 'stick' and is brown? A stick

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What do you call a pig and a ball when u come across both of them? A ball hog!

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Womens rights.

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Dear 6, Please stop hitting on me, I heard you've done some pretty dirty stuff with 9. Sincerely, 7

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There are 3 people in a car, shit, manners, and asshole. They are driving and shit falls out. They pull over and manners gets out to help shit. Then a cop comes and pulls them over. The cop ask asshole what his name is. He said asshole. The cop said what. Then asshole said asshole. Then the cop says where are your manners. Asshole said over their picking up shit.

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What is the best way to kill Kony? Shoot him in the head.

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Why did the fat guy survive the plain crash He didn't he died like everyone else

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whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

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A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: A serial killer B: I don't feel comfortable opening the door

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Q: What's the best way to get a woman to stalk talking? A: Ask them nicely.

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

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why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

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When you give your homecoming date flowers, you're really handing them a bouquet of sex organs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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