What do you call a Mexican with a lawnmower? The guy I'm thinking of is named Pedro. He works hard and takes care of his family.

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Y' can't spell rape without ape.

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what did the short man say to the shoe? i sincerely hope that someone wouldn't try to carry a conversation with an inannnimate object, or else he is socially disturbed

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Q: What did the farmer say when he coudn't find his tractor? A: "where's my tractor?"

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what time does the japanese guy go to the dentist? well his appointment was for 11:30, so he might show up approximately 5 minutes prior to the appointment time, just to make sure everything goes steadily as planned

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Where did the banana go? -Nowhere, a banana can't walk.,

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I have an excuse why one leg and one arm ar shorter than the ather two. I was born sideways and pulled out by an arm and a leg, trust me im not stupid or gay... ASSSSSSSSSSSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..........................That was my turrets kickin in and i have dislexia if i didnt spell turrets right

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tight butthole 4 lyfe.

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Why did the Mexican jump the border? Because his mom told him the grass was always greener on the other side... She lied.

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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What did the boy say after he got hit by a bus? Nothing. He's dead.

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Nock nock Who's there K K who? You forgot the K

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Knock knock.* Who is it? The police. We have news that your daughter was molested and will never been seen again for the man who stole her has takin' her out of our jurisdiction.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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Why was the little boy's hair messed up on picture day? Because he was brutally stabbed in the face.

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Why is a zebra named gorge fat? Because it ate Mcdonalds

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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How is it you become the true badass you say? Its a very complicated process that takes decades of training, and many failed attempts on before you become the one, true badass on the entire planet. Once you had done it. People will love you forever, there would be parades, parties, celebrations, even a holiday, just for you and you alone. Too bad I'll never tell you.

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why did the zombie eat bob because bob was delicious

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what tall and looks like a jew?

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My girlfriend gave me her first ever blowjob last night. I came in her mouth and she washed it down with a can of Carling. Obviously she had to get that horrible taste out of her mouth, so she gave me another blowjob.

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Whats worse than a son killing his own father? His biological father finds him, 10 years later.

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Yo mama is so stuPid that she blew a man for bus money then walked home

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What is the most dangerous place to be right now? Rodney Kings pool.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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