- Anti Joke

Long ago, when sailing ships ruled the sea, this captain and his crew were always in danger of being boarded by pirates from a pirate ship. One day while they were sailing, they saw that a pirate ship had sent a boarding party to try and board their ship. The crew became worried, but the Captain was calm. He bellowed to his First Mate, "Bring me my red shirt!" The First Mate quickly got the Captain's red shirt, which the captain put on. Then he led his crew into battle against the mean pirates. Although there were some casualties among the crew, the pirates were defeated. Later that day, the lookout screamed that there were two pirate vessels sending two boarding parties towards their ship. The crew was nervous, but the Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, "Bring me my red shirt!" And once again the battle was on! The Captain and his crew fought off the boarding parties, though this time more casualties occurred. Weary from the battles, the men sat around on deck that night recounting the day's events when an ensign looked at the Captain and asked, "Sir, why did you call for your red shirt before the battle?" The Captain, giving the ensign a look that only a captain can give, explained, "If I am wounded in battle, the red shirt does not show the blood, so you men will continue to fight unafraid." The men sat in silence. They were amazed at the courage of such a man. As dawn came the next morning, the lookout screamed that there were pirate ships, 10 of them, all with boarding parties on their way. The men became silent and looked to the Captain, their leader, for his usual command. The Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, 'Bring me my white flag!"

What are the two words that once you hear, You will feel a sudden gush of euphoria followed by immense depression? The Game

You know what you can do with your offer to 'help'? Await another opportunity please I appreciate it much.

Yo momma is so ugly, that your father can no longer stand her. They are getting divorced.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coast of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has Stevie Wonder.

I will create more jobs for americans

ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

"Why do children's movies show everything in that happens in the movie in the trailer?" "The same reason I show children everything that's inside of my trailer."

Why did the black cop pull the white guy over? He was going approximately 52 miles per hour on a 40 miles per hour speed limited road.

what's white and long and hairy? -Dean when hes on his period

What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

What would happen if an asian guy and a black guy had a baby? Nothing. It is impossible for a baby to be born since men produce sperm cells not egg cells and for a fetus to form, you need an egg and a sperm, so you would need a male and a female so since they are both men it is physically impossible for them to produce a child.

A Chinese man walks into a bar. With his thick accent, he finds it difficult to order drinks.

A black man has a woman up against a wall, and she is screaming. they are passionate lovers and he is pleasing her greatly.

Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

Have you ever had Kenyan food? Neither have they.

Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

A guy walks into a bar and orders a water because he's the designated driver

Why was the orphan crying? Because his parents are dead.

drugs.

what did the blind, deaf, retarded child, without any arms or legs get for Christmas? nothing, his parents are dead

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair because he had cancer

What wuld u do for a klondike bar? Nothing taste like shit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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