A man was late for work, he came to a stop for his third red light. He stopped and waited for the red light to turn green then continued on his way to work.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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identical jokes get different votes.

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A: why do elephants paint their toenails red? B: why? A: so they can hide in cherry trees B: I don't get it A: have you ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree? B: no... A: exactly

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Ammy Winehouse walks into a bar Don't you said we should stop jocking about dead people ?

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Whoa! A talking carrot!

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Knock knock *the family is on vacation and doesn't answer*

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JAmie stegman loves making love with his sister... he loves inbreeds so much

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brainfart

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Why would a woman be out of the kitchen? Because she is busy working, being outside, resting, or any other activity that does not include food.

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a young boy with no arms or legs log rolls himself outside where he gets struck by lightning

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If you have 10 fish and you drown 5 how many do you have left? 10... you can't drown a fish, and even if you could you would still have 10 because there would still be there, they would just be dead. 5 alive, 5 dead

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How do you break your fan in the summer You dont its hot and you need it

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Why did the fat guy smell bad? He just farted diarrhea.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? None, because feminists can't change anything

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whats the difference between a frog and a toad ones a frog

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A guy is in Weekends Millionaire. He says: I could use a lifeline. Quizmaster: Which one would you like? Guy: Anyone, I have AIDS

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Why was the giant scorpion sad? Because the Holocaust killed his entire family.

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Your everything I've ever dreamed of you sing like a bird your gorgeous your funny your friendly your sensitive your caring your unique and one day I will kill you.

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A man driving through a thunderstorm said, "look, it's rain, dear." His wife, being a reindeer, took offense to that statement.

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Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes? A: Fsh

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Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

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Why did the little girl miss 7 straight days of school? She died.

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How many are in a baker's dozen? 12 bakers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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