What happens when an old lady bumps into a black man in the middle of the night? He politely offers her help getting home and she accepts.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why was the little girl crying. Her dad wiped his bloody penis with her teddybear.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Girl: I wanna get yo pants. Boy: but im wearing shorts.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Rozes r read Vilets r blew iy cahn noht spell becuase i am blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

a blonde does something stupid. she dies. its funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is small, black, and loved by children? An oreo.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Knock Knock Get off my property or I'll call the cops on you!- Napoleon Dynamite

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the man fall off his bike? He ran into a pile of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you get when you mix a burrito and an earthworm? Diaherea

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Do you want to hear the best joke ever? Me too!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

There is no "I" in "TEAM" However, there is a "T" an "E" an "A" and an "M"

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How do you know if an elephants been in your fridge? It's completely destroyed.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A dyslexic man walks into a bra. His face bumped into something that was soft, squishy, smooth, and round... It was a balloon. Someone was having a birthday party.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

When someone throws a rock at you What do you say? A:Oww

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did one blind person say to the other? Nothing. He is also mute.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How do you get a black guy to learn how to read? Find a stolen book and tell them that it's the recipe for the spices in fried chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Arrow in the Knee!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I get more excited then my dog when I give her a treat

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What is the difference between a black person and an elevator? Well, there are many differences such as the fact that an elevator has a series of wiring and mechanics, while a black man, and white men alike, are human beings.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Well I do want it to end now but...WHAT? How did you get that trough? I thought hypnosis was supposed to increase awareness and focus.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

An old man walks into a bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops