A.M.E.V.A.A A-ny M-essage E-xpressed V-ia A-cronym is A-wesome

Did you hear the one about the streetlight? It only came on at night.

I literally died laughing

Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

Obama = ebola

Roses are red the grass is green now open your legs and let me fill you with cream

What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't the farmer shot him before he could have a chance at freedom.

Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had leukemia

Three guys walk into a bar. They each have a few drinks. Then all three leave responsibly in a taxi.

What do cows in Africa say? Moo

Ben Affleck

Why can't antelopes fly? Because they can't

Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

What time is it when an elephant sits on your watch? About 3:26 PM Eastern Standard Time.

What do you call a kid with an eye-patch and a speech impediment? Names.

Today I was reading anti jokes. At first I didn't get it, but then I figured it out and...ah crap, why am I writing this, it's just going to get thumbed down...

a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z i left out p.

How do you get into USA from mexico? Climb a fence

What is the best way to run a race? Start out fast, run fast in the middle, and finish fast.

How do you shoot an eagle? You don't. The eagle is going too fast for you.

What do Batman and Harry Potter have in common? Their parents are dead.

What is the difference between 10 dead babies and a 1,000,000 dollar car I don't have a 1,000,00 dollar car

knock knock whos there. no one your hullicinating, heroine is hell of a drug

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...