John Katzenbach were drinking a soda... He is the author of The Psicoanalist

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Why does Santa Clause eat cookies? Because cookies not part of a balanced diet.

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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How do you help someone stop drowning You take your foot off the back their head.

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What's clear and smells like alcohol? Probably alcohol, genius.

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squash squash who squash my ass

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What did Jim say to Bob? Hi Bob.

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There's a football player who walks into a bar and sees a gay guy. The gay guy says, "So you're a football player, right?" The football player says, "Yes." The gay guy says, "I have a game of football myself. It's called fart football. It's where you drink a mug of beer in less than five seconds and then you drop your pants and fart for the extra point." The gay guy goes first. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds and farts. The football player goes. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds then he drops his pants and before he farts, the gay guy says, "BLOCK THAT KICK! BLOCK THAT KICK!"

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Knock knock! Whose there? ... The person who was knocking suffered a fatal shot to the back of the head by a drive by shooter, if the person at the door had just opened it, instead whose there? (...which no one does anyways...) The knocker may have survived. He had a wife and 5 kids, 3 Grandkids.

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i used to take arrows to the knee,til i took one to the balls.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding a apple in your worm.

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what did "A" and "B" look for when they went to the beach? what are you talking about? letters cannot travel!

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A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Are you a tree? A: No.

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A turtle walks into a bar. The bar tender says "what will it be?" the turtle doesnt reply because its a turtle and the bar tender is sent to a mental hospital for talking to turtles.

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What's the difference between an old quarter and a new penny? 24 cents

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Why do horses read books? We are all doomed...

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Scenario- A wedding while skydiving. Problem- The groom lost his parachute. Question- Who stole it? Hint- The Maid of Honor didn't have one either, but he had one on his body when he hit the ground. Answer- The mailman, but he died of old age.

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2 men walk into a bar. The first man proceeds to fall on the ground and let out a string of obscenities, obviously in excruciating pain. The second man, fearing that he may have suffered some sort of concussion, immediately goes to his doctor and gets checked out. He is still awaiting results.

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What's worse than failing a school test for Peter? Nothing, because he is asian.

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How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

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Who didn't let the gorilla into the ballet? The people who were in charge of that decision.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Chinese. What? Knock Knock.

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what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

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Whats white and can't climb trees? Yogurt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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