A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

your birth certificate was an apology letter from the condom factory

bronson watt walks into a bar.

What's better than sex? Nothing

You're as useful as Baby P's dummy.

What do you call a jew with no money It doesn't really matter because all jews have money

If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled yo his face.

They say animal behavior can warn you when an earthquake is coming. Like the night before that last earthquake hit, our family dog took the car keys and drove to Arizona.

WHY DID THE MAN FART HE WAS A FARTY PANTS AND WE CAN CHAT HERE ON THIS WEB GO TO ANTI JOKE SEE ME I WILL GIVE U JOKES

A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

Guess what? Chicken butt? Poultry gluteus maximus!

Narrator: A ghost walks into a church. It is a Jewish church during a Friday night service. Huh. That ghost looks a lost like Hitler. Oh crap, everyone run for your lives! Stranger: GHOSTBUSTERS! Narrator: what, the, heck? Ghostbuster: let's kill some ghosts! Wait a minute. Adolf, is that you? Hitler ghost: John? Ghostbuster: Adolf, Buddy! Narrator:...... Hitler ghost: Hey, John! Wanna grab a drink? Ghostbuster: sure. let's get out of here. Narrator: This joke has officially lost all meaning. I don't even know why I'm submitting it any more! And get this! I AM HALF JEWISH!

What does Steven Hawking and Justin Bieber have in common? Absolutely nothing.

If you go to an animal shelter to get a pet god, you may be dyslexic.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

Why was the girl crying? - Someone pooped on her face.

Why did the chicken cross the road? there were no more cars in the way

Butterfly is standing on a flower. Cow comes and steps on that flower

why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got run over

How do you make a Russian baby cry? Punch it in the face

There are two types of people in this world: those who can count and those who can't. I happen to be one of those who can.

What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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