What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? Whatever his name happens to be.

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Why did the catholic priest get sent to jail? Tax evasion.

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Domestic violence is a crime. She should leave her abusive partner and seek help.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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How many Manatees does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, assuming Manatees have hands.

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what did the homeless guy get for christmas nothing!

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Why are young girls better at school than young boys? Because young boys think about young girls.

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what's the difference between a white man and a black man? their skin color

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What did the blind, deaf and dumb kid get for his birthday? Broken arms and legs

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Keep up the fun Nero!

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Knock Know Who's there Interrupting ghost Interu--BOO!!! Ha HA!

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what do you call an astrounaut in space? an astrounaut you racist bastard

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What's the difference between red paint and blue paint? One looks like blood and is used a lot in restaurants. The other is blue.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to prove he wasn't chicken

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What happened to that guy who fell? He died from car accident 3 days later.

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What happens when you are a fat 37 year old virgin, with a small penis, poor bone structure, pale skin, a horrible personality, and no friends? You spend all night writing anti-jokes...will someone please like me?

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Why didn't the disabled kid cross the road? He didn't make it.

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why was the black man in jail? He stole food from a store due to the fact that his family was very poor and could not afford to fend for themselves.

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What's long, hard and full of semen? A penis

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What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

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Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

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what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

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How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

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Why was the pig squealing? Because all four of its legs were tied together and it was about to have it's head chopped off so the meat could be processed for people to enjoy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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