People Order Our Patties

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink. What does he order? Nothing. The horse was incapable of speaking English then shat on the floor, kicked over a chair and then left.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Who like vibrating dildos? Cammy

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor? -Cody Williams

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hey i just met you and this is crazy... but loose my number and keep the baby LOL

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i read the terms of service when i posted this

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How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

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http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&start=148&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=L4yN-90F2S2nXM:&imgrefurl=http://www.britishbeautyblogger.com/2012/05/justin-bieber-nails.html&docid=yYdBShdYVODKdM&imgurl=http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-YFyj_mKUypY/T6VP6iGQeCI/AAAAAAAAJjI/y6cpVYjn9Gs/s1600/harry.PNG&w=573&h=413&ei=ZY7HT_XqHo2c8QStiY2IDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=724&vpy=140&dur=435&hovh=191&hovw=265&tx=75&ty=135&sig=110416686013590693091&page=12&tbnh=148&tbnw=229&ndsp=13&ved=1t:429,r:7,s:148,i:142

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Why did the beautiful girl get the job over the not so beautiful looking girl She was more qualified

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Knock Knock *Opens door* Hi John, you got here right on time!

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Why was 2 afraid of 3? Because 345!!!!!

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Yeah, I know too, its as if "Omg he has not replied in 5 seconds something must be wrong", sorry about that. Not endorphin person? That cannot be too good.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The Holocaust. And also cancer.

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"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

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Why was the house on fire? A dog peed on it.

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When you are swimming across the ocean, and you lose your wheels, what's the difference between a duck? ... Because bananas have no bones.

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when push comes to shove, shove repeatedly explains to push that she needs to stop stealing his money and find a new place to live. Push then leaves, allowing shove to return back to his sofa and finish watching the basketball game.

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A pig and an elephant walk into a bar. But the pig doesn't even make it into the bar because the mentaly insane elephant ate him. Ouch

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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what is the only thing in the world that can pick up 1000 jews at once? A vacuum cleaner

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What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

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Whats worse then getting stabbed in the trachea by a aids infected knife? getting pounded anally by satan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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