In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

Why did the man have no friends? He mudered and ate someone in '86 and is rotting in prison.

How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the floor. How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail the other one to the floor.

A boy is eating with his family. A man in the next booth tells him "You are very handsome and you will be a movie star when you grow up." Then the man leaves. On the way out, the boy's mom says "You know he was drunk, right?"

Okay, this is a real joke: A guy slips on a banana and falls down in the most funny way ever, so a girl nearby starts laughing when she suddenly realizes the guy is bleeding profoundly, so she runs over to help, but it turns out the blood was just ketchup so... Just then they both got run over and killed by a car.

whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

What did the penis say to the other penis? What? Penis motherbucker

Poop

Why did the black man lose his leg? Because he was kidnapped and tortured.

Did you hear about the boy with the treehouse? He caught his mom cheating on his dad in there.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 witnessed while hiding in a closit 7 rape and kill his mother.

Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he overslept and missed a job interview and a chance to support his family.

What is the worse joke to tell a Orpahn Knock Knock Whos there not your parents

A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's hard to tell, but i could really use a cigarette.

What's brown and sticky? Brown paint.

Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

How do Elmer Fudd take a shower? Without a shampoo, he's bald..

Women's Rights

There was a peice of lasagna. He knew he tasted great. So he constantly feared for his life.

Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

Guy 1: When your Justin Beiber af. Guy 2: What Guy 1: Do you mean

How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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