Asian son: "I'm using a calculator for my math" Asian mother: "Why not you calculatnow!"

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Nero? You are alive? Holy shit! You are like so my hero! I love you man! I was so saddened to hear you where tortured and killed, but then I read about this "Axel Knight" and hoped it was you, it sure sounded like you! Please tell me its no joke, you are a hero around these parts, and we really miss you, honestly sir, is it true point zero has become some sort of utopia or are the painkillers making you a bit Hazy? I am Erica by the way, still with the order, but what is this about your empire?

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David entered a radio contest to see who had the best pun; his pun was insufficient and he did not win.

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My wife told me that I should see things from a woman's point of view. So I looked out the kitchen window.

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Why did the women cross the road? I dont know.. why? no clue.. why was she out of the kitchen

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What do you call a bear in an elevator?...A fire hazard.

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how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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A stoner walks into a bar. A few minutes later he is asked to leave by the bartender because he is disruptive and uncoordinated. The stoner leaves because conflict is not in his nature.

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What is the difference between a fridge? I'm sorry, I have a severe mental disability and telling jokes is not... F'tang F'tang Zoop Pong Wii!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw a fridge at it

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A man lying in bed at night rolls over and starts rubbing his wife's back. She says, "Not tonight, honey, I have a headache." Her husband respected her wishes and went to sleep.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? He said "Get in the car".

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What is invisible and smells like cheese? Cheese. I lied about the invisible part, because cheese is not invisible.

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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Why did the black kid fail his math test? Because he had down syndrome

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ur gey

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What's the difference between a duck?

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What did the tractor say when he lost his farmer? Where's my farmer??????

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If you share rice between 30 Africans what do they each have? Aids.

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An man walks into a bar and then proceeds to purchase an alcoholic drink.

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What do you get if your mailman drops your letter in black paint? Blackmail

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. That is highly improbable, due to the fact he is in a wheelchair.

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What did one blind person say to the other? Nothing. He is also mute.

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A catholic priest invited one of Sunday school students to his house one night. They watched a movie and the boy was home before his bedtime.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops