four little monkeys jumping on the bed... one fell of and bumped his head... mama called the doctor and the doctor said... im calling child protection services.

What's the difference between a black man and a pile of shit ? One is a black man, the other is a pile of shit.

How do you escape a vicious tiger? You cleverly create a distraction so the tiger's focus is not on you. Then, you quickly run away because the tiger doesn't know you are leaving.

What has two wings and a halo? A chinese phone. WING WING HALO?

What did the cat say at his mother's funeral? Nothing. He was too grief stricken over the loss of his beloved guardian.

Friend: Hey dude, you wanna come to my house after school and do some Meth? Other Friend: Nah I dont wanna get scabs all over my skin, disgusting teeth, and im not in the mood for dying early. Im good here.

Make little things count Teach midgets math

Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

What does the ice cream man say to the kids? Hey kids want some ice cream?

A Priest, A Pedofile, and a Rapist walk into a bar. He Orders A Drink

Mean while... at Jerry Sandusky's house

What do you get if you cross a football with Theo Walcott? A goal kick.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

Why are elephants big, grey, and wrinkly? Because if they were small, round, and white, they would be called 'asprin'.

Q: Why is there a crack in the liberty bell? A:Because someone droped it and it broke

Knock, knock. Who's there? A black Russian.

an man of hispanic descent ran into a pole his white friends proceeded to laugh at him not because he was in pain, but because he was different

Why does a black person buy water? Because everyone needs water to survive SKH RZH

Knock knock. Who's there. To get to the other side.

What did it say on the banner for an international dyslexics support group? Dyslexics of the world unite.

What's the difference between a black man and a monkey? Millions of years of evolution

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

Some of the people on this site who write these "jokes" are complete morons. Many of them believe that racism, sexism, and spamming is hilarious. Each one of them is a ****ing dumbass and needs to be removed from this site. Racism is not funny, people are murdered because of it! Those who think that they are being funny by insulting others need to get a life and stop ruining this site for others who want to read good jokes free of racism. Africans, Hispanics, Jews, and everyone else deserves better than to be insulted like this. And I'm a white, so take that you racist whores! I apologize for those of you who have good humor that have to read this, but those other jerks need to be told off.

This is a racist joke but who cares!? What is the difference between a black guy and a bag of shit? The bag I apologize to all my fellow black friends. -Lets go MEts

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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