A man walks into a bar and has a wonderful time drinking with his friends, arrives home at a reasonable time and goes to bed.

1+1 =? Too

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal, and this wasn't just any road. It was the new highway built, with frequent traffic jams and a speed limit of 90 mph.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing because muffins can't talk. The other muffin replied, 'What an odd conversation starter!'

Yo mama so fat! She should be concerned because diabetes is a serious problem that can lead to a heart attack. Also STOP EATING MCDONALDS.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

Two ducks are sitting in the bathtub. One asks, "Hey, can you please pass the soap?" The other responds, "Sure, if you pass the typewriter."

What's the difference between a duck, an engineer, and a leaf? There are many differences between these 3 that I will not list them all.

How did Jimmy get hit by the car? He dropped his Ice cream cone.

Why was the manspenis big Cause he was a lucky bastard

TRUE COMEDY: "HOW ABOUT THAT AIRLINE FOOD!"

The holocaust

What does the latin maid does when I tell har to clean behind the couch? Nothing, she doesn't speak English.

A man, a woman, and a kid are sitting at a table. They are eating dinner, the kid turns to the man and proceeds to explain how he wishes to drop out of school. The man sends him to his room as punishment. The man and the woman resume eating their dinner.

roses are red violents are blue your dad is gay soon it all be you !

Whats worse than receiving a dollar? Receiving a penny.

A blond, a brunette, and an Asian take a test. They all get exceptional grades and pass college.

what did the robot say to the centipede. Stop being a centipede!!!! Its funny because robots have arms.

c:

Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

What did the black man drink on a hot summer day? Some water, it quickly replenished the liquids he was perspiring do to the temperature being sufficiently hotter than his body temperature

What are the black specks in birdshit called? That's birdshit too.

Justin Bieber's voice sounds like Michael J. Fox playing a theramin.

What did the tuna say to the fan I LIKE YOUR STOOL AHAHHAHAHHAHAH

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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