Why did the boy bump into a pole. He was sleep-walking with his eyes closed.

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Why did the Asian man have squinty eyes? He was looking at the sun.

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. Deez nuts Ok

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A kid goes to the doctor and orders a salad. The doctor replies, "This is a smoking-free environment". The kid puts out his cigar and goes to Olive Garden to get his physical.

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What's worse than anti-joke.com? Non-anti-joke.com! Louis

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why was the black guy crying because he was getting whiped because he wasent working in the felids

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Once upon a time, a princess was hungry. and there was a frog wearing a tux for some reason.so the princess ate him. THE END.

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Kim Kardashian's Marriage.

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what's brown and sticky? a stick.

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

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A Quadriplegic walked into a bar,

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Bring him to shore and, if you are certified, perform cpr.

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Satan called. I put him on hold.

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25

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Two men are sitting in a bar. They finish their drinks and pay the bill before leaving.

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Whats worse than having no mother? Having no mother and father, enabling you to have to support a family at the age of 12, using the allowance that your parents are supposed to give you once a week.

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Whats worse than bad sex. Being nice raped in the anus by a teletubby.

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what do you call a needle with two heads? a two headed needle

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What do you call postman pat when he is retired? Pat.

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So this guy walks into a bar. He is promptly rushed to the hospital due to the risk of brain damage, concussion, or other serious head injury.

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What do you get when an Alabama and an LSU kid are mixed?A small child who grows up in a world of fighting and domestic violence.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? 9/11

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. Yes dyslexic people drink too.

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A: thats what your mom said last night! B: my mom committed suicide when i was three because she could not handle the stress of being a teen mother with an abusive boyfriend. A: oh... B: yeah....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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