What did Goldilocks say to the three bears? She asked them how bears make porridge without opposable thumbs.

What did the human say to the human? You are a human.

A kid with no arms or legs is stuck in the desert. Sucks to be him.

Who is Red and White and comes on Christmas? A Russian Candy Cane

What's long and hard on a black man? First grade.

Why did the boy miss a day off school? He was in a coma

3 black men walk into a bar. They order their drinks, tip the bartender, and could not have been more courteous.

A white guy and a black guy are standing in a room. Which one of them is a murderer? I don't know, there is not enough information given in the question. However, according to Bureau of Justice murder statistics over the last 30 years, the black guy is 7.6 times more likely to be a murderer than a white guy in the United States.

Why aren't jokes funny in base 8? Because 7, 10, 11.

Why was the black man sad? People were frequently talking and whispering about his dark colouring behind his back. Also he had no legs.

What is the first step in making an ugly girl pretty? Shave her genitals.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 1

What did the college kids drink at the party? Soda. Alcohol is illegal for people under the age of 21 to consume.

Whats funnier than a real joke? An anti joke

What's worst than Rick Perry? Two Rick Perrys.

What do you call a fat Mexican? Whatever his name is.

Q: What do you call a ghost with a broken leg? A: Hoblin Goblin.

I had sex with the Earth, and out came global warming...Imagine what will happen if i had sex with Obama?

What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? *awkward silence* What did the deaf guy say to the mute guy? *Awkward silence....huh?*

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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Why did an abusive childhood affect the little boy's behavior? Beats me.

What do a large mouth bass and my wife have in common? They are both in the Animal kingdom, both are vertebrates and they share many other traits such as eyes, a notochord, and epaxial/hypaxial musculature.

What begins with "f" and ends with "uck"? A curse word.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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