Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness ... Hello?

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When life gives you melons, you know you're dyslexic.

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A man is walking on a beach when he finds a golden lamp. He rubs it and a genie comes out. The genie tells the man he will grant three wishes. The man wastes his wishes on material goods that do not bring him happiness.

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What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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husband; do you come here often wife: i live here

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OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Jessica walks into a bar jokes jessica cant walk

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Real jokes.

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GONNA

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Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your worst nightmare!! Ohh.... Do come in it's raining outside.

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how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

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What did the cat say to the chicken? Nothing. Animals are not capable of speaking.

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What is black, white, and red all over? Obviusly a sunburned panguin.

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Knock, Knock! Who's there? Matt. Matt, who? You're friend Matt that you texted twenty minutes ago telling me to come over.

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Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

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Noah is Smart.

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Why did Rose throw the clock out the window? Because she's a moron.

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Hey, did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? No He didn't either.

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Saddam Hussein is the father of the mothers of all cultchies.

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roses are red, violets are blue, fudge is sweet, heres some fudge.

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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