how do you kill a blonde? -a gun, knife or any other lethal object

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My dog has no nose, so how does it smell? It can't, I just told you it has no nose.

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I tried to post an unfunny punch-line-less joke on anti-joke. It worked and I got tons of emotional affirmation from it and stuff, so thanks.

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A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people up*. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

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A Jew, a Muslim, and a Christian walk into a bar, they then sit down and discuss the various political factors driving a wedge between unity, peace, harmony and understaning between their religions. They resolve that despite the differences in religious belief, essentially they are all the same, and want happy existences with family and friends, and that equality and peace between religions should be a prime focus of religious institutions and governments. They then band together to criticize aetheists, who present a much more probable explanation for why the Universe is the way it is. An eavesdropper then mulls over the idea that the various religions represented behind him are willing to debate philosophical standpoints, so long as their monotheistic beliefs are not contradicted.

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drugs.

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OK, A plane carrying 200 passengers crashes on the border between America and Canada. Which side of the border do you bury the victims? Well, it would depend on where the passengers where from or what they had stipulated in their living will. I suppose some would be cremated which opens up a whole other can of worms entirely.

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Why did the black man not tip his waiter? Because she provided terrible service and was undeserving.

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how many fish does it take to turn on a lightbulb None, lightbulbs dont work in the ocean

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Why does my girlfriend pee standing up? Because he is a man.

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What happens if you throw a red ruby into the black sea? It gets wet.

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A black guy and a Mexican jump off a bridge. Who dies first? Nobody cares.

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Q: How do you surprise a newt? A: Jump on it while shouting, "slippers." This may not work as the newt may die before it has the chance to be surprised, however the slippers should be intact.

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Why did the passenger plane crash? Well, if not mechanical failure or human error, probably because a bomb was detonated onboard.

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Why did the white man rub the black man's hair for good luck? Because it's good luck to rub a black man's hair.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She was shot Knock knock Who's there? Sally Aren't you dead? Oh yeah K Well imma go be dead now Have fun K

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am.

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Shit.

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One time i ate a sandwich it was good

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Q: What is worse than loosing your arms? A: Dying

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What's the difference between a train and a lamp? A lot

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No, I don't have ADH...- Oh look, a butterfly!!

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Why dont you ask the chicken.

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Why couldn't the kid get into the Pirate movie? He died in a car crash on the way there because of a drunk driver.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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