PENIS

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Wife: 'what did I put into the washing machine ?' Husband: laundry

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What does a man like. food.

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Want to hear an anti-joke?

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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What the diffrence between a jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven

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What's the difference between a woman and a cat? Numerous things

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What's worse than anti-joke.com? Non-anti-joke.com! Louis

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A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some chapstick, put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because as all people know, Ducks cannot speak, however, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need chapstick anyway, since he has no lips.

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what's black, long, and moves around a lot? a van.

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Q: Why did the paraplegic go to the gym? A: to watch his friend work out

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A black man walks into Best Buy and buys a Television full price.

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Satan called. I put him on hold.

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What's similar about a black person and an apple? Nothing, an apple is a fruit. It has nothing to do with hanging from trees.

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A man runs into a bar and warns everyone about the hurricane.

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I have no joke. u mad?

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why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

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A fellow walks into a bar very down on himself, so he goes into the bathroom and hang himself from the pipes.

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Who is Soulja Boy's best friend? YOUUUUUUUUUUUU

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What's sweaty, fat, and Italian? Italians

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What did the frog say Magican? Ribbet.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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How did the dog die? It was wet because of the rain so the little boy put him in the microwave for 30 minutes to warm him up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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