What is the difference between a Jew and pizza? a pizza doesn't yell when it goes into an oven

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what is brown and sticky? a stick

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Cos crossing the road usually doesn't work out too well for chickens.

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Q. why didnt the boy get a christmas present from his dear grandmother? A. because she died on thanksgiving

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What's worse than finding gum stuck on the bottom of your desk? A clown following you around carrying a shotgun and throwing toothbrushes at you.

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Got milk? No.

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What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

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Person 1) Yo mama's so fat Person 2) My mother died in a horrible car accident last week

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face.

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What did the peanut butter say to the jelly?

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A Mexican and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a couple drinks. Then they leave because it turns out that wasn't the bar they were meeting the Jew at.

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What do you call 4 Mexicans hopping the border? 4 Mexicans in search of a better lifestyle from poverty.

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throbbing slobber

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Knock Knock Whos there? smell map smell map who?...really? I was in the middle of a phone call with my paraplegic wife's doctor, who was telling me that her condition has gotten worse and doesn't think she'll make it to the end of the month. You interrupted that in order to get me to say something that sounded like "smell my poo". Forget being allowed into my house, you should be worried about being allowed into heaven. Hopefully as you walk home today, someone will murder you.

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A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people up*. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

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The WNBA

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If you say gullible over and over again, it sounds like stupidity.

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Why did the man go to the restaurant? Because he wanted to get some food.

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What did the man say to his wife when he bought a dog? I bought a dog.

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A Poem that would be from a stocker: Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a Gun Get in the Van and NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A man has 72 cookies, he eats 64 of them. What does he have left? Diabetes.

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A purple kangaroo hops into a bar. There is no such thing as a purple kangaroo. The end.

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Roses are green Violets are yellow I have mental problems Doobah haga Blakatrabbit

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Whats 10+10? A mathematical equation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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